A love that is longer than life

2006-12-30 17:03:00 Author: Wei Xuanli Source: "Reader" (Rural Humanities Edition) 2006.05

一

Her memory of her father began when she was 5 years old. That night, her father and mother had a quarrel. After she was woken up, she walked out of her bedroom sleepily. A cup flew towards her and hit her on the forehead with a "pop" sound. Blood flowed from her eyes. Come down. Before she could cry, her mother was so frightened that she burst into tears. Her father also panicked. After being stunned for a moment, he woke up and hurriedly picked her up and ran to the hospital. The hospital was about ten kilometers away from home. Her father was running all the way, and beads of sweat kept falling on her face. Her father kept calling her name, his voice gentle but urgent. She deliberately ignored her father and slumped limply in his warm arms. Her father was so anxious that he shouted: "Yaya, don't scare me!" She suddenly put her hands on her father's neck and whispered in his ear: "Dad, please don't quarrel with your mother again, okay?" ?"

The father laughed, then cried again. He said, "Yaya, don't scare dad again..." His voice was choked, and he hugged her tighter after saying that.

Since then, my father and my mother have never quarreled.

That year, she was 5 years old and her father was 35 years old.

Two

As she entered adolescence, she grew into a slim girl. There were often notes in the desk drawer that boys secretly put in them. One day, she hurriedly picked up her schoolbag to go to school. The strap of her schoolbag suddenly broke and the books were scattered on the floor. Her father squatted on the ground to help her pick up the books. A piece of paper fell out of the book. It said: "Let's go on an outing together on Sunday. I'll wait for you." The owner of the note was the boy she had always had a crush on.

The father held the note in his hand and read it again and again. She blushed and her heart skipped a beat, her eyebrows lowered and her eyes lowered, not daring to look at him. My father said nothing, folded the note, and inserted it again.

On Sunday, she rode a bicycle for more than 20 kilometers and went on a date with the boy in the suburbs. On the way, the weather suddenly changed, with thunder and lightning and heavy rain. When she arrived at the appointed place in the rain, there was no one there. Standing alone in the wilderness, her enthusiasm was gradually cooled by the rain. Disappointment and fear were intertwined, and she finally couldn't help crying. Suddenly, she heard a familiar voice: "Yaya, don't be afraid, daddy is here."

From then on, she never had a crush on her male classmate again. She swore in her heart that she would never find him again in the future. As a boyfriend, you must find a tall, handsome, solid and reliable man like your father.

That year, she was 14 years old and her father was 44 years old.

三

That summer, she was admitted to a key county high school. Her father was very happy and took her for an interview. When taking the sprint test, she wore a pair of worn-out sandals because she had not prepared in advance. After running a few steps, the back strap of the shoe broke. The shoe was caught off guard and was thrown far away from the runway. She looked at the shoe and suddenly felt funny. She stood on the runway and giggled.

She got a "0" score in physical education. The teacher's reason was: her attitude was extremely unserious.

She could no longer laugh out loud. You must know that if she failed in physical education, no matter how high her score in cultural classes was, the school would not admit her. With tears in her eyes, she searched for her father in the crowd, but she couldn't find him. When she was feeling extremely regretful, her father ran over sweating profusely, holding a pair of brand new sneakers in his hand. He put the shoes into her hand and said eagerly: "I'll go talk to the teacher and let you take the make-up exam again!"

She sat on the ground to change her shoes and saw her father walking quickly through the crowd. , struggled to squeeze in front of the teacher, bent down, lowered her head, and said something anxiously, she vaguely heard the teacher's scolding. It was a day at the end of August, and the sun was as hot as fire. She silently looked at her father with his head bowed in the hot sunshine from a distance, imagining that he was smiling on his face and humbly apologizing for her, and suddenly there was a pain in her heart. ...

Her father's efforts finally earned her the qualification to take the make-up exam. When he ran over to her happily and told her, she was already in tears.

She passed the make-up test in the afternoon with the first place in the grade.

That year, she was 16 years old and her father was 46 years old.

Four

During the summer vacation of her sophomore year in high school, she went to play with her classmates. On the road, the car she was in collided with another car. When her father arrived at the hospital, she was already lying in the operating room. When she saw her father again after the operation, she could hardly recognize him. His face had become old and haggard, the corners of his eyes and mouth were shaking violently, his black hair had turned gray, and his tall body suddenly became rickety. Overnight, my father aged more than ten years.

The doctor had concluded that she would spend the rest of her days in bed. Her father did not dare to tell her the result. He held her shoes in the hospital toilet and cried loudly. The iron-clad man, At this moment, I feel completely like a helpless child. Her father stayed by her bed for three months, turning her over and feeding her. He carried her to the third floor for acupuncture and then to the fifth floor for inspection. Step by step, his clothes were soaked with sweat.

A few months later, her father noticed that the muscles in her legs were beginning to atrophy. He finally ignored the doctor's warning and stubbornly put on her shoes and let her go to the ground.

He said: "Yaya, we can't just accept our fate, you have to stand up!" He slowly moved her to the bedside, and he and his mother held one of her arms, trying hard to get her to stand up. But her paralyzed legs refused to obey her orders at all, her body kept shaking, big beads of sweat dripped from her face, and they were panting from exhaustion. However, her father still persisted and refused to give up. As a result, he fell to the ground and she fell heavily on him.

She finally despaired and fell on him and cried hysterically.

He sighed and burst into tears...

That year, she was 17 years old and her father was 47 years old.

五

Her temper became particularly irritable. Just because her sister wore the skirt she had worn before, she refused to let her go. She overturned the table and fucked a girl. The wine bottle was thrown at my sister. The father blocked his sister behind him, and the wine bottle hit his arm hard. The sharp glass slices cut his arm, and blood flowed out all of a sudden. Her father's hand was raised high, and his slap seemed to fall on her face. She closed her eyes and shouted hysterically: "Fight, fight, beat to death...what's the point of living like this?!" His slap did not fall, he stamped his foot hard and roared at her. : "How long are you going to keep making trouble? Look at your little potential..."

She lay awake that night. Her father played the erhu outside the window all night, and he absorbed all the melancholy. In the music, the erhu was played in a sad and desolate way. She cried in shame at her father's sorrow, and she could clearly see that his betrayed heart was bleeding outward.

When having breakfast the next day, she said to her father: "Dad, go to the library and get me a library card." Her father looked at her, and the muscles in the corners of his eyes and mouth trembled violently. When he got up, his hands trembled visibly, and the dishes he held fell on the table.

Since then, every afternoon, on the road leading to the library lined with tall ginkgo trees, I often see a middle-aged man pushing a girl in a wheelchair. Sometimes, the girl tells the story in the book with great interest, and the man listens and laughs peacefully; sometimes, the man sneaks into the small flower bed on the roadside and folds a sprig of white magnolia, and the girl suddenly calls him nervously. : "Dad, someone is coming!" He ran back in a hurry, only to realize that he had fallen into her "trap."

That year, she was 19 years old and her father was 49 years old.

Six

Her first article was published in the city newspaper. Her father ran to the newsstand, bought all the newspapers of the day, and then stood stupidly on the street. , handing out a copy to everyone she saw, repeating one sentence: "There is an article about my daughter in today's newspaper." She looked at it from a distance, tears blurring her eyes again and again. She said to her father over and over again in her heart: "Dad, I did not let you down.

"

That day, her father cooked a table full of delicious food and drank wine. It was the first time her father drank alcohol after she recovered from illness, and he was drunk. Drunk, her father grabbed her hand and said incoherently: "Yaya, you are dad's pride... You don't know how worried dad was about you..." He lay on the table like a child. , cried "woo woo".

She gently stroked her father's silver hair with her hands. Each strand of hair was written with a father's torment and struggle, worry and care. Tears fell from her eyes.

That year, she was 23 years old and her father was 53 years old.

Seven

She is in love. The other party was a primary school teacher who had been briefly married, but he had a good temper and was very attentive. Her father watched the man wash her face and comb her hair, buy her books and snacks, carry her up and down the stairs...then he safely handed the wheelchair into his hands. Once, she heard her father talking to someone else: "My girl, her boyfriend is a teacher, teaching mathematics. They both know each other, and they actually get along quite well..." She could hear that there was something in her father's tone. It means to show off.

On the day she got married, according to local custom, her father should carry her into the car, but she could not find her father anywhere. She wanted to kneel on the ground, kowtow to her father, and tell him seriously: "Dad, I'm leaving." However, her father did not give her such a chance.

When the wedding car passed by the small flower bed where her father had folded white magnolias for her, she suddenly saw her father squatting on the steps in front of the flower bed, looking blankly at the passing vehicles and pedestrians, with his hands on his hands. He wiped it on his face, and then wiped it quickly again, as if wiping away tears. The car was going very fast, and she kept looking back at the figure that was getting farther and farther away, getting smaller and smaller, and her tears fell on the white wedding dress.

Later, her sister told her that after she left, her father had been hiding in her room and smoking. He was in a trance for a while and always called his sister's name after hers.

That year, she was 26 years old and her father was 56 years old.

Eight

She became pregnant in the second year of marriage. Her physical condition did not allow her to have children. Her husband and mother took turns trying to persuade her, but she remained unmoved. So her mother "moved" her father in, and her father looked at her and said, "Yaya, you have to be careful!"

Her pregnancy reaction was very severe, so her father lived in her house and bought Related books, researching all day long on how to eat well for her and the children. For 8 months, she was raised by her father until she was as rosy as a flower and as beautiful as a flower.

As her due date approached, she suddenly became upset one night. She got up at around 3 o'clock and went to the study. When she turned on the light, she suddenly found her father sitting on the sofa. Seeing her, her father asked nervously: "Are you feeling well? Do you want to go to the hospital?" She saw the ashtray on the coffee table was full of cigarette butts. Her father smiled and said, "I can't sleep anyway, I'm afraid something might happen to you. ..."

When I was about to give birth, the doctor said that a caesarean section was required and asked my husband to sign the operation sheet. My father repeatedly told the doctor: "If there is an accident, I will protect you." During the night, my father refused to go back regardless of anything. , he sat on a bench outside the delivery room all night. At 3 o'clock in the morning, I finally heard the child's loud cry. The nurse came out and said, "It's a girl. Mother and daughter are safe." The father rubbed his hands and walked back and forth in the corridor excitedly, but he fainted after walking only two laps.

After waking up, the doctor complained to him: "You are so old and your blood pressure is still so high. Why bother?" But he grabbed the doctor and asked: "How is my daughter?"

That year, she was 28 years old and her father was 58 years old.

Nine

How long can you love someone?

Zhang Xiaoxian said: "We can love someone longer than his life, but we cannot love him longer than our own life. After the person we love dies, we can still love him forever, but we can only love him forever. Love until the end of our own lives."

But she wanted to say: "No, that's not the case. There is a kind of love that lasts longer than his life, even if one day his life has ended. His love and affection will remain with me for a long time - that is the deepest and most profound father's love in the world!"

Isn't this it? I found it quickly after searching. I also love reading magazines like Reader and Youth Digest, but I haven’t read them in a long time. Reading these again, I feel deeply moved that I haven’t seen in a long time.