Today, we summarized some destructive "manipulation" personal behaviors, looking forward to looking back at our debugging methods for boyfriends. If there is something wrong with the direction, please make an adjustment as soon as possible.
1, guilty of manipulation
Guilt manipulation is that you habitually use your boyfriend's guilt to drive him to do something he won't do to get what you want. You create guilt by giving birth to them, making them feel guilty, then filling your mental state, and then doing things according to your intentions.
For example, if you plan to buy a TV with your boyfriend, we could have reached an agreement on which brand to buy, but you keep saying, "Just pick what you like, I'll listen to you when I'm free."
But you hinted to him your preference for another option while talking, and pretended to laugh it off to show your sadness and pay attention to your habits and devotion to him.
What are the routines for training boyfriends? Although it seems that you made concessions to your boyfriend, you are actually using this method to arouse your boyfriend's guilt, drive him to make the choice you really want, or at least let him make it up to you in other ways.
This insincere and highly targeted method has turned some things that should be handled according to communication into emotional kidnapping, which is very harmful to everyone's contact. Because of the overuse of this manipulation, it is very easy to leave your boyfriend with a "smart" experience, and then you can't feel trust in many ways.
2. Assembly training
There are also some girls who often hone their boyfriends in order to better study whether their boyfriends are good to them from the side, from burning their brains to setting a trap "fishing law enforcement".
For example, if you hate your boyfriend's going out to nightclubs and bars, you could have let him know what his personal behavior is that you don't allow, but you insisted on asking him a question, "What would you do if a beautiful lady came too close to you when you were dancing?"
When he answered "I can avoid it", you suddenly flew into a rage and asked "Why did you go dancing?" There are so many brain burning problems like this that your boyfriend will always be scared when he communicates with you. _ Either he is more and more glib, or he will think you have gone too far. How to cultivate a boyfriend?
Step 3 play the victim
Men are all protective, and properly exposed sense of need can arouse boyfriends' protective desire and make them more willing to invest. However, it is harmful to the association to kidnap her boyfriend from the perspective of the weak and the victim.
For example, my boyfriend is busy at work recently and spends too much time with you. You can communicate with him by expressing your experience and asking for it-"I haven't slept well recently, which may be mental stress." Spending more time with me will be very helpful to you. I understand that you are very busy recently, but can you at least talk with me every night? " How to cultivate a boyfriend?
And if you deliberately get drunk and call your best friend in the middle of the night to send you to the hospital clinic to have a transfusion bottle, and complain pitifully that your boyfriend ignores you to arouse his heartache and guilt for you, it is very likely that he will buy it once or twice. If you use the same trick too much, he will either feel numb or think you lack style. _ The result is that I really don't care much about you.
What are the routines for training boyfriends? I firmly believe that now everyone understands the difference between debugging and manipulation, debugging is in a positive direction, and it will correctly guide the mood to develop in a harmonious direction; Manipulation is negative information, which will cause irreversible damage to feelings in the long run. If you have been manipulating your personal behavior when you are in a relationship, the sooner you terminate it, the more you can immediately reduce the damage to your feelings.