A: Salty egg, because salty egg superman (plagiarist).
Q: Which emperor was blind in history?
A: Kangxi (I can't see it).
Q: Why does Xiaobai look particularly like Dabai?
A: The facts are clear.
Q: I dropped the cake. Who encouraged him to come forward?
A: Pig, because of chocolate cake.
Q: What color is Spider-Man?
Answer: White, because Spider-Man (is white).
Q: Which flower has the least strength, rose, jasmine or lily?
A: What a beautiful jasmine (ineffective jasmine).
Q: Why is the mother of an elephant an orangutan?
A: It is born from the heart (just like being born from a gorilla).
Q: A pair of conjoined babies. My sister's name is Mary. What's sister's name?
Marilyn Monroe.
Q: An idiot took down the toilet on the plane and threw it away. Why?
Because he is an idiot.
Q: What are cloth and paper afraid of?
A: It's not that (cloth) is afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) is afraid of one thousand.
Q: Who was the first to be named and endorsed, the kitten, the puppy or the chicken?
A: Puppy, because Wang Wang Xianbei (barking first).
Q: Which is more urgent, the city or the countryside?
A: In the countryside, why should we rush to speculate with each other (the country river is too urgent).
Q: Among the 26 English letters, ET has gone. How many letters are left?
A: 2 1, because he also took away UFOs.
Q: How can I make the sparrow quiet?
Answer: Press it, because it is silent.
Q: Who has the best flying skills in history?
Answer: Cao Cao, because it is said that the devil will come.
Q: Who has the heaviest weight in history?
Answer: Dou, because Dou can't afford it.
Q: If we call a bear without a tail a koala, what shall we call a bear without a JJ?
A: The mother bear.
Q: Why don't monkeys like parallel lines?
Answer: Because there is no intersection (banana).
A medium-rare barbecue and a medium-rare barbecue. Why don't they say hello?
A: Because I am not familiar with it.
Q: Who gave you the water of forgetfulness?
A: Aha, because aha, give me a cup of forgetful water.
Q: What animals can be attached to the wall?
A: Seal (poster).
A rooster and a hen type three words.
Two chickens.
Q: What is the eunuch's favorite English word?
A: under (personal experience)
Q: What brand do eunuchs hate most?
I cut plums (no)
Q: What is the eunuch's favorite song?
A: Yi Song rested because Luo Ji …
Q: A person stands on a tree and sings rap, typing a word.
Answer: Sing, because that person is singing: again, again, again.
Q: If there is a car, I sit in the driver's seat and you sit in the co-pilot seat, whose car is it?
A: Yes, if.
Q: Four people are playing mahjong. Suddenly, the police rushed in to arrest people, and then took five of them away. Why?
A: Because those four people are playing mahjong.
One day, a penguin was bored, so he began to pluck his own hair. After pulling it out, he said, "It's so cold."
Another day, a boring polar bear began to pluck his own hair. After pulling it out, he said, "The penguin is right, it's really cold."
Another day, the penguin was really bored, so he swam from the North Pole to the South Pole to find the polar bear. When they arrived at the polar bear's house, the penguin knocked on the door and asked the polar bear, "Polar bear, come out and play." The polar bear said, "I don't want to play." So the penguin went back.
Several prisoners were bored in prison, so everyone decided to tell each other some jokes every day. But after a long time, everyone's jokes were repeated, and when they were tired of listening, everyone numbered each joke. One day, a prisoner asked, "Do you remember No.81?" As soon as the voice fell, a prisoner burst out laughing. Everyone asked him why he laughed like this. The prisoner said, "It's the first time I heard the number 8 1. It's so funny."
There is a man named Cai Xiao. One day, he was walking on the road and was taken away.
Xiaoming's hairstyle is like a kite, and everyone laughs at him: "Your head is like a kite." Xiao Ming was very sad, so he began to cry. He cried bitterly, and Xiao Ming flew away.
A bird flew over the corn field. As a result, the cornfield caught fire and the corn turned into popcorn. The bird thought it was snowing, but it froze to death
"The mad dog chased me after. I threw a steamed stuffed bun at it, hoping it would give up chasing me, but I knew it was in vain. Society is often so cruel. "
-the language "sausage memoirs"
There is a male deer, which runs very fast. He ran faster and faster, and finally turned into a highway.
Three rabbits found some radishes, and later found that they were not enough. One of them said to the youngest rabbit, "Go and find some radishes."
Little Nutbrown hare said, "No, I'm afraid you'll steal these when I leave."
The other two rabbits said, "Don't worry, we promise to wait for you."
So the rabbit left safely and didn't come back for a month. A rabbit said, "Let's eat these radishes." The other said, "Wait a little longer."
Half a year passed, and the little rabbit didn't come back. The rabbit said, "Let's eat these radishes." The other said, "Wait a little longer."
A year has passed and the rabbit hasn't come back yet. The rabbit said, "Let's eat these radishes." The other said, "All right."
Then the little rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby grass: "Look at what I said."
Home appliances hold a joke contest together to select the funniest joke, but once the joke is not well said, it will be eliminated.
The microwave oven talked about one first, which was very funny. All the appliances laughed, except the TV. It said, "It's so cold." As a result, the microwave oven was eliminated.
The oven tells another story, which is also very funny. All the appliances laughed, except the TV. It said, "It's so cold." As a result, the oven was also eliminated.
Then the tape recorder told a story, which was so funny that all the appliances laughed. The TV said, "It's so cold."
When others were puzzled, the TV suddenly turned around and said to the refrigerator behind him, "Please open your mouth when you laugh. It's freezing. "
A wolf met a rabbit. The wolf went up and gave the rabbit a mouth and said, "Let you not wear a hat."
So the next day the rabbit brought a hat and met the wolf. The wolf gave the rabbit another mouth: "Let you wear a hat."
The rabbit was anxious and went to the tiger to complain, but before he entered the tiger's house, he heard the tiger talking to the wolf inside.
The tiger said, "Wolf, you can't bully the rabbit like this. It is hard for me to complain to him. "
The wolf said, "What shall we do?"
The tiger said, "You can make some excuses. For example, if you ask the rabbit to find something for you to wash clothes, and he looks for soap, you beat him and say you want washing powder. " If he is looking for washing powder, tell him you want soap. Or you can ask him to find you a girl. If you find fat, you should be thin. If you find a thin one, you say you want to get fat. "
The rabbit left quickly after eavesdropping.
The next day, I met a wolf The wolf said, "Go and find me something to wash clothes."
The rabbit asked, "Do you want soap or washing powder?"
The wolf was surprised: "well, forget it, find me a girl."
The rabbit asked again, "Do you want to be fat or thin?"
The wolf was anxious: "You are a dead rabbit!" " "Then give the rabbit a mouth:" Let you not wear a hat. "
One day, a piece of candy was walking on the road, and its legs became soft and turned into soft candy.
In the refrigerator: an egg said to the egg next to it, "Look at that egg over there. It's covered with hair. It's disgusting. "
So the egg said to the egg next to it: Look at that egg over there, it's covered with hair, so disgusting.
All the eggs began to talk to each other. Finally, Mao Dan couldn't help it: "Are you idiots? I am kiwi. "
Once upon a time, there was a steamed bread. He ate a meatball and turned it into a steamed bun.
Q: A fat word fell from a tall building. What has it become?
A: Fat bastard.
There was a man named Worry, and one day he suddenly gave it up.
Q: Two people fell into a trap together. Dead is called dead. What should the living one be called?
A: Call for help.
Q: Why did the plane fly high without hitting the stars?
A: Because the stars will flash.
There is a polar bear who always thinks he is not cool enough and plans to find a sunglasses belt. But he looked for it for a long time and couldn't find it. Finally, before he found sunglasses, his hands and feet were dirty. After he put it on, he looked in the mirror and said, "It turned out to be a panda in our city."
Who is Amy's mother?
A: Flowers, because peanuts.
Q: If Hua marries a foreigner and gives birth to a child, what is the foreign name?
John, because of peanut butter.
In summer, a giraffe met a rabbit, and she proudly showed off her neck to the rabbit:
"Oh, little rabbit, do you know how good it is to have a long neck? Do you know how sweet the top leaves are? ... do you know that drinking cold in summer means that the neck feels cold water flowing slowly through the neck? ... oh ... "
The rabbit looked at her and only said, "Have you tried to throw up?"
Q: Which cartoon character always lives in the dark?
A: Robot cat, because it can't see five fingers.
Q: Which cartoon character likes to help others best?
A: It's still a robot cat, because it always lends a helping hand.
A buddy went to the ball game and kept shouting "Niu B, Niu B."
After the game, the staff sent him to the dairy farm.
Q: Why is there no Buddhism in the south?
A: Because there is no Amitabha in South China.
Q: How did Lin Daiyu die?
A: A sister Lin fell from the sky when she fell to her death.
Q: Why is the European Cup better than the Asian Cup?
A: Because the European Cup is an E Cup and the Asian Cup is an A Cup ... ...
Xiaoming said to Xiaogang, "It's raining outside, see?"
Xiao Gang said, "Yes, and you?"
A lemon was walking on the road and suddenly said, "Oh, my feet are sore."
A: "I'll take you to a place where all girls don't wear bras."
B: "Really? Where is it? Take me away! "
A: "It's in the kindergarten next door!"
One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruit.
He announced: "children, we can wash the fruit together after picking it, and we can eat it together after washing."
All the children went to pick fruit.
As soon as the assembly time came, all the children got together.
Teacher: "Xiaohua, what do you have?"
Xiaohua: "I am washing apples because I picked them."
Teacher: "What about you, Xiaomei?"
Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."
Teacher: "The children are great! What about Amin? "
A-Ming: "I'm washing cloth shoes because I stepped on shit."
A pair of nude statues have stood face to face in the park for decades. One day, Cupid, the god of love, came to them and said, "It must be depressing for you two to look at each other every day, but you can't do it. Today I want you to be human and do what you want! " But only fifteen minutes. "
Say that finish, the two statues turned into people, and the two men immediately jumped into the grass, and the haystack rustled. ...
Ten minutes later, they jumped out of the grass. Cupid said, "Alas, there are still five minutes. Enjoy it again. "
Say that finish, the two men looked at each other, smiled and jumped into the grass. ...
I vaguely heard the female statue say to the male statue, "I pinned this pigeon down, and now it's your turn to shit on its head."
Biologists investigate the living habits of penguins; So I found a penguin and asked, "What do you usually do?"
The penguin replied, "Eat, sleep and beat Doby."
Biologists think this penguin is very interesting and beat Doby.
I asked another one, and the answer was still: "Eat, sleep, and beat Doby;
The third asked;
The third answer is still: "Eat and sleep and beat Doby;
Ninety-nine penguins were asked this way, and the answer was: "Eat, sleep and beat Doby;"
When asked about one hundred, the penguin replied: "Eat, sleep;
The biologist was puzzled and said, "Why are you so special? Why not hit Doby? "
The penguin sneered: "Hum, I'm Doby;
One day, Face A and Face B met for a trip.
Suddenly a gust of wind blew.
Noodles A fell into the sea.
Noodles b laughed at noodles a.
Wow, hahahaha ~ noodle soup
Netizen A just changed her msn avatar and excitedly asked Netizen B: "Do you think my avatar is awesome?" Netizen B replied: "I like it very much."
You choose.