How long is a person's life? Children expect to grow up, leave home and create a world of their own through their eyes; When I really grew up, I began to miss it and give it up. I began to be afraid of losing what I had gained in life, and I was afraid that the outside world would have unbearable ups and downs. Life is such a contradiction, life and death, love and hate, passion and dullness, persistence and abandonment, just like prosperity and adversity.

Look at others, look at yourself, think about others and think about yourself. In fact, prosperity and adversity are never absolute things. What is prosperity? Do you mean to be happy, get everything you want and see the hope of the road ahead? What is adversity? Is it just the opposite? I stumble in the reality I don't like every day, embarrass myself, miss something very much, but I can't get it. What I obviously got suddenly disappeared.

However, many times in life, just when you think this is a good time, when you think the road ahead is smooth, when you take everything for granted, unexpected changes will happen, and everything will be lost, even what you originally owned. Because the world is full of variables, the only constant is the change itself-this seems to be a sentence I often say, and I like to enjoy it.

From this point of view, prosperity is actually the most dangerous time for people. Because you are proud of the spring breeze, because you are in high spirits, because you have a plan in your heart, because you have too many hopes and demands for the future road, because you never think you will lose it, so you can't see the hidden crisis and trap on the future road, and you don't think there will be thorns behind the flowers. Therefore, there is only a thin line between prosperity and adversity.

Therefore, I believe that everyone will encounter adversity, and how to deal with adversity is the most important topic in life. Because adversity is the crossroads of life and the touchstone of life. Adversity is sometimes like a watershed in life. What kind of person you want to be and how to control your life can only be seen in a glance. Only after experiencing adversity can you become the person you want to be.

I often feel that in the face of adversity, there will be three kinds of people who take three different attitudes:

First, change yourself to adapt to the environment. Since I can't get it, I don't want it. I am content with what life has given me, and I will bear it. Second, unwilling to bow to reality, persistent in pursuit, changing the status quo and life, the more frustrated and brave; Third, maybe you sigh that you have no talent, complain about others, feel that life is too unfair, and always feel that others owe you.

For the first kind of people, I think it deserves respect and understanding. Their courage lies in bearing the pressure and heavy responsibility of life and being responsible for their own choices. The second kind of people are also brave in life, because they know how to devote themselves to their goals; There is only the third kind of person, and I don't think there is anything desirable.

There is also a kind of person who comes from prosperity or adversity and is tolerant and open-minded. From then on, there is no difference between prosperity and adversity. He is calm and indifferent, knows how to enjoy the process of life, understands that gains and losses are inevitable things in life, and will not be upset because of the success or failure of the result. This is what I yearn for, the fourth kind of person.

A stable environment, superior status, abundant wealth and comfortable life seem to be favorable conditions for the development of individuals, families and even the country. However, history and practical experience have repeatedly told us that a person in a superior position often has to pay a heavy price for all the superior conditions he enjoys.

In the writings of a modern historian, Hannibal's failure in the Second Punic War is explained as follows:

For human beings, Gapuyaping is kind, while the Roman plain is merciless. When the Romans left their hometown where they could not make a living to conquer one neighbor after another, Gabonese stayed at home and let one neighbor conquer them. ..... However, at the critical moment of the most important war in Roman history, the next morning after the Battle of Canny, Gabonese opened the door to meet Hannibal and "rewarded" Rome with this action. Both Rome and Hannibal agreed that the transformation of Capua was the most important result of this war, perhaps the decisive event. Hannibal entered Gapuya and spent the winter here-but at this moment, something unexpected happened. After spending a winter in Gabon, the morale of Hannibal's army completely collapsed, and his army could never win the battle again.

Compared with Hannibal, an oriental monarch is more cunning and wise. Herodotus, the father of western historiography, described King Ju Lushi of Persia as follows: A man named Arden Bells went to see him and made the following suggestions:

Now that Zeus has given his territory to the Persian nation and your majesty, why don't we move out of this rugged and rocky place where we live now and change to a better place? There are many good places nearby, and there are more good places farther away. As long as we choose, we can shine in this world. This is the natural way for a powerful country, and we have great opportunities today, because we have built an empire in a populous land in Asia.

Ju Lushi listened quietly, not interested. He told the people who asked him that they could do whatever they wanted, but for this matter, he said that if you change places, you should be prepared to change people in your mind. He told them that a comfortable environment will cultivate people who have no guts without exception.

Similar to the story of Hannibal in the history of China. During the Spring and Autumn Period, the dispute between wuyue was neck and neck, and Gou Jian, who made great efforts to govern, finally defeated Fu Cha, who was extravagant and indulgent. There are more philosophers who hold the same ideas as Ju Lushi in China. Confucius said, "Wealth is like a cloud to me. ..... A gentleman can't keep his place, and he can't eat enough. " Mencius said: "Born in sorrow, died in happiness. ..... The day is about to fall, so people must first suffer from their aspirations, work hard on their bones and muscles, and starve their skin ... "Despite the lessons from the past and the wisdom of saints, in the 5,000-year history of China, what we see is still the replacement of aristocratic families, and families will become a beautiful talk about managing families for five generations. In the eyes of modern people, the most typical example of the decline of Gao Liang's descendants is the children of the Eight Banners in the Qing Dynasty. This people on horseback used to be brave and brave, and "riding and shooting" is the tradition of their generations. However, only 100 years after becoming a parasitic ruling class, the descendants of these warriors on horseback have degenerated into useless mediocrities-caged people who haunt teahouses and theaters. Even without the Revolution of 1911, they had to hand over military power to Han strongmen a long time ago. In fact, several generations of rulers of the Qing Dynasty have long known the reasons for the decline of the Qing Dynasty. Yongzheng said that among the children of the Eight Banners, "the poor have good food and fresh clothes". Gan Long said that the standard-bearer "only knows fresh clothes and delicious food, squanders money and resources, learns from each other, and has no regrets. This is why the flag bearer is poor. " Jiaqing said: "I don't know how to save money on weekdays. If we can save food and clothes at any time, we can avoid want. " However, despite repeated orders from several generations of emperors in the Qing Dynasty, they advocated riding and shooting and frugality, but they still could not recover their decline.

Although the Manchu Dynasty was a latecomer to the Central Plains, their failure to carry out the Manchu Dynasty was a portrayal of the decline of the nobles in China. Due to the decline of nobles everywhere, strict family instructions and Zeng's family letters are regarded as magic weapons-this is almost a teaching of knowing what not to do. Please read some proverbs of Zeng Guofan's godson:

Every official family, from frugality to luxury, from luxury to frugality. You are still young, you can't be greedy for luxury, and you can't get used to laziness.

In my opinion, the more humble children from poor rural families are, the easier it is for them to grow up, while the more charming children from rich families are, the more difficult it is for them to succeed.

When the situation is too smooth and there is no difficulty in stimulating, it is difficult to expect its growth.

Basically, Zeng Qinghong believes that prosperity, wealth and luxury are not conducive to growth and perfection.

Many westerners hold similar views. Iacocca said:

The greatest and best people in mankind were born in poor schools. This is an inspiring school, and it is also the only school that can cultivate great people and talents.

Sociologist Pareto's words are more famous in the field of social science:

History is the tomb of nobles.

It seems a paradox that prosperity is not conducive to development. Because of this, prosperity turns adversity into development, and adversity turns prosperity. After all, success, prosperity and comfort are the goals that most people pursue. Once they get it, it will immediately lead to the opposite result, which is not overwhelming! But this is not a paradox, but a cycle that seems to exist in reality. As far as family and even nation are concerned, nothing is eternal; Historically, there have been more cases of prosperity and decline, and it has been repeated. As far as society is concerned, as Pareto said, "history is the tomb of nobles", corrupt nobles are declining or being eliminated, and new elites are emerging from civilians, and the position of elites is not in a vacuum. However, because the social pyramid is always "big and small, not all people at the bottom can participate in this' elite cycle'" Pareto's thought accords with our proposition of "the price of prosperity" and is also a perspective to understand the "elite cycle". From the historical experience, the more upstart you are in the cycle of social status, the more you have to pay a painful price for your status. First of all, because the status has changed too much, it is impossible to resist all kinds of pleasure temptations and maintain the old mentality. Secondly, due to their lack of contact with traditional culture, they failed to learn the way of self-cultivation and governing the country, so they are even more unruly.

Why do people in prosperous and superior conditions often have to pay for it? What do they lack? Objectively speaking, what they lack is proper pressure. Too little pressure leads to too little stimulation, which weakens the motivation of all parties to adapt and forge ahead. Many psychologists believe that stress is an indispensable part of everyone's life. Even Hans Selli, a psychologist who specializes in the harmful effects of stress, admits: "Stress is the stimulus of life. Stress cheers us up and keeps us alive. " Berlin's experiments show that humans and other animals are more responsive to complex, novel and unexpected stimuli. Lin Ze et al.' s experiment shows: "Compared with the littermates who were not stressed in their early years, the cubs who are used to being tested by electric shock and toe pinch seem to be more able to cope with stress when they grow up." The superior conditions in the early years will undoubtedly release heavy pressure, which is not conducive to the formation of the strong character of the parties.

We can also borrow the theory of psychologist Adler to see through this phenomenon. Adler believes that all people are inferior at the beginning of their lives; Inferiority is the main driving force for everyone to achieve success. He initially associated inferiority complex with physical defects, and people with defects may try to strengthen their organs or make up for them by developing the functions of other organs. An overcompensation made him surpass the level. For example, demosthenes in ancient Greece overcame stuttering and became a great orator; Caesar, Alexander and Roosevelt all made amazing progress after overcoming their physical defects. Adler also pointed out that inferiority complex will hinder a person's development. Later, Adler expanded the basic conditions of inferiority complex, linking it not only with physical obstacles, but also with mental and social obstacles. Adler also believes that the pursuit of superiority is the other end of motivation, rather than overcoming inferiority. From this, we can understand that the acquisition of superiority may weaken motivation, and because of superior conditions, there is less general inferiority and "excessive compensation" to overcome it, so it is difficult to cultivate extraordinary people.

So, do people need to pay for prosperity and superior conditions? We say that Ju Lushi's foresight is admirable, but his attitude is unworthy, which is a disguised form of cynicism. Perhaps it is because of his lack of enterprising spirit that he dare not venture into a new field. Finally, Persia did not make an unparalleled contribution to human civilization like Greece. When you enter prosperity and maintain your advantage, you should be prepared for change. The more fully prepared you are, the more likely you are to reduce the cost. In the final analysis, the price of prosperity is the weakening of motivation and the loss of enterprising goals. Therefore, once the environment changes, we should quickly find alternative pressure, alternative stimulus and alternative new goals. The conditions of inferiority and superiority are not isolated, but come from comparison-comparison with one's own past and comparison with people around. Therefore, managers like Zeng Guofan hope to weaken the contrast between family and people around them through strict self-discipline and frugality, weaken the contrast between their present situation and their past hard struggle, and constantly put forward lofty goals for their children to inspire people to forge ahead. No family or nation is immortal, but there are qualitative and quantitative differences in their respective prosperity, which shows the indelible role of choice, effort and consciousness.

It is precisely because of suffering, adversity and even physical defects that some great people have been created. In many people's minds, there is a worship of suffering and adversity, which is often blind and negative. First of all, an active and healthy life should strive to set new lofty goals for itself, and encounter new difficulties and obstacles in the process of pursuing this goal, so as to develop and express its personality; We can't and can't go backwards or stay in trouble (like Ju Lushi) to keep our thoughts. Secondly, adversity is far from a sufficient condition for creating a positive personality, and countless people in difficulties and adversity have no motivation to change the status quo. As far as the objective environment is concerned, we can at least find two reasons for this lack of stimulation: (1) This environment is closed, and the sufferings without comparison will not give the parties more stimulation; (2) This kind of environment is suffocating, and people in it can't see any chance to change and jump out, so they accept their fate. Stress in adversity will make some people, but it will also destroy some people. Excessive inferiority in adversity will disintegrate a person's vitality.

Different environments have different effects on people. Prosperity and adversity, suffering and comfort make the parties pay different prices. Our idea is not to make people change their minds or defend their depravity and depression after stating and analyzing these costs, but to help people understand this relationship and better adapt to the ups and downs of status and environmental changes.