1 Don't be a doll-hugging madman

In Little Painful Love, Shang Gege has been living with her mother since her parents divorced. My mother takes care of her at home full-time, and my father gives them living expenses every month. Anyway, Shangjia's father is the big boss, so it is no problem to give her daughter living security. Their mother and daughter lived together, and their father was not idle. They married a young and beautiful female graduate student twice in the middle, and divorced in less than a year. Later, they met a daughter-in-law who was married three times with a son, Niu Niu, and a daughter, Yi Yi. This fashion father has also changed, not only to look good, but also to be able to live. When he saw the divorced Yang Lan people look good, he also wanted to live a good life. They got married after getting along for more than half a year, and the days were smooth.

Who knows that one day Shang Gege came without saying hello, but she didn't tell Yang Lan the specific reason, that is to say, she would stay here for a while. Arguably, who doesn't want to live with his mother, but has lived in a house with a stepmother and a stepmother doll? One day, Yang Lan was not at home, and of course his father was not at home. Gege took Niu Niu and Yiyi to order pizza, only to see two babies wolfing down their food. Gege said, "My mother's pizza is even more delicious, really."

Niu Niu said, "Then why don't you stay with your mother?"

Gege just told me why she moved here from her mother. She said that her mother was a baby-clinging madman, more sticky than the cheese that Niuniu was eating. Because her mother didn't have a job, she became her mother's full-time job and the object of her work. She stared at her day and night, even if she sneezed a little, her mother was so nervous that she asked questions and asked if there was anything wrong.

One day after living in Gege for a month, her biological mother found Yang Lan, the third-married daughter-in-law of the husband she had never met. Mother Gege said that the child refused to see her, and said to her husband's third wife, "You help me persuade the child, she is my baby, and I can't live without her." As long as she can come back and talk to me, I promised her that I would adjust myself and not close myself to being a full-time mother. "

At this moment, her face is full of sadness and embarrassment. It is really helpless for her ex-wife to ask her stepwife to help educate her children, or who will? But so is Gege. She stays at her own mother's house and obviously wants to eat her mother's cooking, but she doesn't want her mother to live like this again. It's full-time, for her, but it's not what Gege wants.

2 Let go, my son is happy, and the family is happy.

Coincidentally, there is also a passage in Little Joy in which Feng Yifan, a sophomore, doesn't talk to his mother. In fact, his parents are the kind who sacrificed a lot for him. Both parents are ordinary workers. My father's salary as a proofreader in a publishing house is not high, and he is a part-time wedding host, but he did it secretly outside, and his family didn't know. Husband and wife have been separated for some time, but in order not to affect their son's college entrance examination, they should pretend to be a harmonious family every weekend. They thought the play was in place, but in fact, the children already knew it. That is, when the mother proposed to rent a house outside to accompany her, the children proposed that their parents live together. One is to see if they can promise, and the other is that if they promise, there is no possibility of getting back together.

When Feng Yifan didn't talk to his mother for nearly a month, Pan Shuai, the teacher, suggested a cold treatment. That night, Feng Yifan's mother Zhu Manyu moved out of the house they rented for her children's college entrance examination. When my mother was waiting for a taxi outside with her luggage, Feng Yifan actually hid behind and watched quietly. Looking at my mother's thin figure, a lonely person is waving for a taxi. He also knows that his mother saved money for his own good, and she didn't blink when she enrolled him in cram school, no matter how expensive it was. He knows that his mother loves him with all her heart, but now he feels that this love is too crowded and makes him breathless. He doesn't talk to his mother these days, he's not happy, and he's not in the mood to study hard.

After his mother moved away, Feng Yifan's father began to play. In his words, it turned out that his son was occupied by his wife, and now it was his turn to play. In daily life, he is not strict with his son, and respects the wishes of his children. The idea that his son wants to transfer to liberal arts has a long history, but his mother has been blocking it. Now that his mother is gone, Feng Yifan's father has no opinion, as long as the children like it, he will support it. Regardless of his parents' study, Feng Yifan is more active and has more motivation to learn his favorite liberal arts.

This dad, who doesn't cook much, searches for recipes from the Internet every day, and the food is even more unique. Sometimes it's childish Spongebob fried rice, sometimes it's barbecue that can only be eaten in restaurants, and sometimes it's instant noodles that his mother doesn't allow him to eat, so the children always eat cleanly.

I really lived with my father, and my son began to like and be interested in this father. Why did my father often come back dressed in fine clothes and turned his head upside down? After a follow-up, he realized that his father was presiding over the wedding. The father who was at the scene was no longer the father who could not argue with his mother clumsily, but the one who was quick-witted and sang beautifully. It turned out that his father was such a person.

Mother Zhu Manyu later wanted to compromise, and she couldn't live without this baby. She wanted to return to her family and listen to her son, and agreed as long as she liked her. After her mother let go, she also had her own time and space, and her son was happy, and their little family was reunited, and there was no more arguing. Feng Yifan's mother cares too much and sacrifices too much, but her children are unhappy. On the other hand, although her father sacrificed a lot, he is doing what he likes and letting go of his children. On the contrary, they get along very well and are very happy.

3 Parents are human beings, so to make children happy, we must be happy first.

Teacher Hong Lan once said that one night she met her colleague's child in the subway station, and the little girl began to cry as soon as she saw her holding her. It turned out that I quarreled with my mother and ran away from home, and then I didn't bring any money, only a bus card. She has been wandering around the subway station, and she doesn't want to go home. Teacher Hong Lan advised her to go home while learning about the situation. It turned out that her mother was too tight, and she always said to her, "How much I have sacrificed for you?" But the child thinks why do you sacrifice for me? I'd rather not have my mother sacrifice.

In fact, when Teacher Hong Lan said that her mother complained that I had sacrificed so much for you, I could especially imagine her mother. This is what many parents are doing and used to do. Just like Shang Gege's mother, Feng Yifan's mother, they all sacrificed their own people for their children, some sacrificed their careers, some sacrificed their hobbies, and some had to compromise and get along with people they didn't like in order for their children to go to school well.

You said you could act it and try your best to do it well, but now the children are very smart. He can see that. Just like Feng Yifan's parents separated not long ago, this sensitive child found out. He knew that his parents played for him, and his heart felt bad. His grades began to plummet, from dozens of students in the whole school to hundreds. And the dull parents are still smugly thinking that their children haven't found out because they play well.

In fact, the more you sacrifice for your child, the less happy the child will be. Therefore, parents should spend more time on themselves instead of focusing on their children. When you are happy, you will be healthy. When you are healthy, you will have the strength to earn more money for your children, and you will be more secure in going to school in the future. And if you are happy, the child will be infected with the kind of vitality in your words and deeds, and he will be happy from the heart.

The writer Wu Zhihong once said, "True healthy love is to work hard, give yourself love, and then share the abundant nourishment in your heart with each other."

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