If you want to understand the customs of a place, it is best to take a look at the weddings and funerals in that place. It can almost be said that it condenses the local customs for centuries.

From the Qing Dynasty to the Republic of China, marriage between a man and a woman was based on "the orders of the parents and the words of the matchmaker."

The wedding etiquette is very complicated. The procedure is roughly as follows: the matchmaker first measures the family status of the man and woman, commonly known as "matchmaking". If they think they are equal, they will verbally introduce the situation to the parents of both parties. After both parties agree that they are "a good match", they will use red paper

The male and female niangengs are written and passed to each other by the matchmaker. Each person places the red paper under the chime of the shrine. If there is no serious accident at home within half a month to one month, the parents will ask someone to calculate whether the "horoscopes" of the male and female are mutually reinforcing and interfering. If they are not mutually reinforcing,

Only when they are in conflict with each other can they be recognized. This is called "harmony".

After "He Geng", an auspicious day will be chosen, and the parents of both men and women will prepare a "Bi Geng" gift.

The man will give jewelry or coins, and the woman will give stationery, shoes, handkerchiefs and other items in pairs.

The matchmaker guides the female representative to the hall of the male family, burns incense and candles, sets off firecrackers, pays homage to the ancestors and gods, and holds the "Pluck Geng" ceremony.

The parents or relatives of both parties write the birth year, month, day and time of both parties on red paper opposite each other, and exchange them with each other, which is called "Luan Shu" or "Geng Shu".

It has binding effect on both men and women.

Reporting the date: One month or several months before the wedding, the groom's family chooses the date of the wedding and writes it on red paper. The matchmaker is asked to use this to notify the bride's family and bring along gifts, clothing, jewelry, etc. as betrothal gifts. This is called "reporting the date".

If the woman has no objection, she will arrange the marriage according to the date set by the man.

One or two days before the wedding (sometimes on the wedding day), the woman will carry the dowry to the man's family in a carrying box, which is called "making a house."

The man then gives the woman's family gifts of cloth and silk, gold and silver jewelry, pastries, sweets, fish, meat, chicken, duck (or goose) (all in even numbers, meaning in pairs), which is called a "gift".

The woman then sends her son-in-law clothes and shoes, commonly known as "He Lang's clothes".

On the day before the wedding, the groom's family prepares wine to entertain the matchmaker. After the banquet, the groom or his parents prepare "three sacrifices" to the matchmaker's house to "invite a matchmaker", and the matchmaker also prepares gifts in return.

On the day of the wedding, the man prepares a four-person sedan, commonly known as "bridal sedan", with colorful flags and a band, blows fire and firecrackers, and is led by the matchmaker to the bride's home to greet the bride, which is called "bridal reception."

There are red couplets affixed to the sedan door; usually the man writes "Welcome the bride on a lucky day" on the side, and the woman writes "Return home in good time" on the side.

The male guest brought by the woman to see her bride is called "Master", and the female guest is called "Grandma". Depending on their family background, they either walk or ride in a sedan chair and follow the bride's bride and groom.

After paying homage, the bride's chariot is parked outside the gate and the ceremony of "cutting grass" is performed.

Lisheng read out the instructions for killing the grass, killing the chicken, and spreading salt, tea, rice and rice, saying that this would keep out the evil spirits brought by the bride.

Afterwards, the sedan chair is carried to the main room, where two women with many children and wealthy families (those who are taboo on remarriage) help the bride out of the sedan chair and lead her into the bridal chamber.

After a short rest, the bride is picked up by relatives and the groomsmen to help the bride to the main room. Candles are lit and cannons are fired. The master of ceremonies gives instructions to the bride and groom. They first worship heaven and earth, then ancestors, then parents-in-law and elders, and then the husband and wife bow to each other, which is called "making love".

"Bai", commonly known as "Bai Tang".

The He Ni Zan ceremony invites the newlyweds to the flower candles, takes two small cups (cups), sifts the wine into them, and the couple drinks together, then clasps the mouths of the cups, seals them with a red silk knot, and places them under the pillow, which is called "He Ni Zan".

fragrant".

The newlyweds in the tent, each holding the same knot and connected to each other, sit on the edge of the bed. The groom recites a poem while scattering red dates, peanuts and candies into the tent, which means "jujube (early) will give birth to a noble son" blessing, which is called

"Spread the tent".

After the ceremony, the guests exit the bridal chamber.

On the night of the bridal party, relatives, friends and neighbors gathered in the new house. The host served refreshments, played gongs and drums, sang and danced, forced the bride and groom to sift tea and pass cigarettes, and joked wantonly. The newlyweds did not take it as an insult, and the parents did not stop it. It was called "house quarrel"

", also known as "bridal chamber".

There is a saying that "there is no difference in the size of the house for three days".

Mao Banquet: The next morning, the man entertains the woman's "master" and "grandma" with wine, and is accompanied by the man's elder relatives and friends. This is commonly known as "Mao Banquet".

After the banquet, the kitchen cleaning ceremony is performed, the chef sings and praises, and the person sending off the bride gives red envelopes and other gifts to the chef and waiter as a reward.

Three days after the wedding, sweets, wine and food are prepared at the groom's house, and the bride and groom return to her parents' home together, either in a sedan or on foot, which is called "returning to the door".

The bride's family invites guests to accompany the groom, which is commonly known as "homecoming wine".

After drinking, the newlyweds went home without staying at the girl's family.

After the founding of the People's Republic of China, the new marriage law was implemented and men and women had independent marriage rights.

When young people choose a partner, their parents still have to worry about it. Relatives and friends recommend it, and I agree.

Before getting married, register with the local government, obtain a marriage certificate, and then choose a time to hold the wedding.

The etiquette for marrying a girl is basically followed in rural areas.

However, customs such as "combining eight characters", "chuan geng", "farewell to ancestors", and "cutting grass" were gradually abolished. Asking matchmakers and worshiping heaven and earth were streamlined. It was no longer common for brides to cry at the wedding, and people took the sedan chair instead of walking or riding in a car.

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The number of betrothal gifts, the number of banquets, and the specifications of banquets should be based on reality and within one's ability.

Most units and towns use new-style weddings, and they are often held on New Year's Day, Spring Festival, May Day, National Day and other festivals. They are presided over by parents or leaders of unit administration and labor unions, and are attended by introducers, colleagues, relatives and friends.

The ceremony is generally as follows: the ceremony begins, the cannon is fired (with festive music played by an ensemble of musical instruments), the officiant speaks, the witness reads the marriage certificate, the guests' relatives and friends give congratulatory speeches, the bride and groom deliver speeches, and the ceremony is completed with the firing of cannons.

After the meeting, a banquet was held to entertain the guests.