Zhao Benshan: I heard that he changed his job as an improper chef to an anti-fraud hotline, but he felt threatened and he would never be cheated again. The cruel reality almost pushed up my psychological defense. If I don't sell him something this year, I won't be able to fulfill the topic I promised the audience for three years!
Cai Weili: Master, let's go in.
Zhao Benshan: Don't worry, dial a harassing call first!
Fan Wei: Hello, this is the anti-fraud hotline. I am an old fan who has been cheated by myself. With years of experience, I can make a clear judgment on whether you are fooled or not. ~ ~ ~ Please press 1 for abductions, 2 for cars, 3 for brain teasers and1/kloc-0 for stretchers!
Zhao Benshan: Hello!
Fan Wei: Hello!
Zhao Benshan: Excuse me, are you Master Fan?
Fan Wei: Ah ~ Who are you?
Zhao Benshan: This is ~ ~ ~ I have a question to ask you directly.
Fan Wei: Ah, you're right!
Zhao Benshan: We have an old sow with white flowers in the dark. She got up in the morning, opened the door and ran like crazy at 80 miles an hour. She hit a tree and died!
Fan Wei: Killed? Is there anything wrong with the pig's eyesight?
Zhao Benshan: Both eyes are 1.5!
Fan Wei: Are you mentally ill?
Zhao Benshan: I am mentally healthy!
Fan Wei: Then how could it be killed?
Zhao Benshan: Because that pig can't think fast!
Fan Wei: I said you are not picky. You don't play by the rules. Press 3 for a brain teaser. In that case, I also ask a question!
Zhao Benshan: Say it!
Fan Wei: After the Spring Festival, our family didn't buy new year's goods, only a pig and a donkey were left. Do you think I should kill the pig or the donkey first?
Zhao Benshan: Then kill ~ ~ first and give you two a chance!
Cai Weili: Donkey meat is delicious! Kill the donkey first!
Zhao Benshan: Kill the donkey first!
Fan Wei: Congratulations on your correct answer, and so does the pig! ~ ~ ~ demo, ~ ~ hum!
Zhao Benshan: Sadness, I really sympathize with you. I intend to travel alone. How can this reassure me?
Wang Xiaohu: Master, kill the pig first!
Zhao Benshan: That donkey thought the same thing! I'm telling you, it's not good for you to kill anyone first on this issue! Why didn't I answer, just because I thought he had a problem! ~ ~ Yes, see? He has grown from a neck in those days to two calves now!
Cai Weili: Master, he is wonderful. I think we should go home!
Zhao Benshan: No, the kidnapper crippled him, and the seller fooled him. If I don't get rid of him in 10 minutes, I can't be a teacher with you two!
Wang Xiaohu Cai Weili: The master leads the door, and it's a fool!
Zhao Benshan: OK, look me in the eye and go in! Beautiful him, look, hahaha, he ran away, where did he go!
Cai Weili: Is Chef Fan there, please?
Fan Wei: Hey, who are you? You ask ~ ~ ~ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, the pig hit a tree. You hit a pig, didn't you? Did you rear-end the car? Why did you change it to 3 again?
Zhao Benshan: I have missed you for three years!
Fan Wei: Fool!
Zhao Benshan: I've come to confess to you!
Fan Wei: Keep joking!
Zhao Benshan: My apprentice is my witness!
Cai Weili and Wang Xiaohu: Hmm!
Fan Wei: I organized a group here to fool me. It's hard to fool me. What else can you do as long as our kind people are alert to you? Huh? Just a few brain teasers! There are/kloc-0 monkeys on the ground, and there are 7 monkeys on the tree, which are both two monkeys and eight monkeys!
Zhao Benshan: Maybe three monkeys, maybe nine monkeys!
Fan Wei: Why has it changed again?
Zhao Benshan: Pregnant with a monkey!
Fan Wei: Is it interesting?
Zhao Benshan: It's boring. I won't give you a brain teaser. I'm here to apologize! In the past three years, the most sorry person in the world is Chef Fan. What a nice guy! I always tell you, why do you think I lied to him? How honest and upright! You hit me twice, you can't do it, you scold me, you can't open your mouth, so, anyway, you forgive me, I will come, forgive me or not, I will come with sincerity!
Fan Wei: Yes, yes, yes, it's still paved!
Zhao Benshan: Help me up!
Fan Wei: Yes, I can stand up. There's nothing wrong with it. Okay, okay, okay. Take two steps. Take two steps, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh Everyone is watching, and everything has nothing to do with me! Why do you always hang around like this? Get up! what can I do for you? Let's get this straight, okay?
Zhao Benshan: Do you want to hear it?
Fan Wei: I want to hear it!
Zhao Benshan: Did you get your letter?
Fan Wei: As long as you stand up, I will believe you!
Zhao Benshan: Go away, I can stand up!
Fan Wei: Say it!
Zhao Benshan: It's a long story. I remember it was the first snow in 2003, a little later than in 2002!
Fan Wei: What did you do with the lyrics? If you have something to say, just say it!
Zhao Benshan: I won't play with you. I will apologize to you today. Get the goods! Look familiar?
Fan Wei: Is this the hundreds of dollars you cheated me of?
Zhao Benshan: Not a penny!
Fan Wei: Which watch is this?
Zhao Benshan: I have it in my hand. I haven't read it yet!
Fan Wei: Big Brother! ! ~~
Zhao Benshan: The feud between us should be settled. The chief culprit that has delayed our feelings in recent years is the wheelchair. Today, I must break it in front of you!
Wang Xiaohu: Master can't break it!
Cai Weili: Master, this wheelchair is a witness to your brother's reunion!
Zhao Benshan: Don't talk nonsense, I, you can't stop me!
Fan Wei: Brother, if you want to hit me, you are too sincere. The children are right! It is not only a testimony of our reconciliation, but also a wake-up call for me to avoid being fooled in the future. I have collected it!
Zhao Benshan: No, how can you accept what the children have given me?
Fan Wei: I'll pay!
Zhao Benshan: How much is it?
Cai Weili: Two thousand pounds!
Fan Wei: I'll give you two thousand pounds!
Zhao Benshan: I'll give it to 2,500!
Fan Wei: I'm three thousand!
Zhao Benshan: I'm 3,500!
Fan Wei: I'm four thousand pounds!
Zhao Benshan: I'm five thousand!
Fan Wei: Deal!
Zhao Benshan: Put it on Chef Fan.
Fan Wei: You shout 5000, and I'll finish with a hammer. Deal!
Zhao Benshan: No! You remember wrong. How did you shout?
Cai Weili: I heard it was Chef Fan!
Wang Xiaohu: No! It's the master!
Fan Wei: Look!
Zhao Benshan: What a mess! What a mess! Well, it doesn't matter who shouts! Look at us. Who shouted first?
Fan Wei: I called first!
Zhao Benshan: How much did you shout?
Fan Wei: I have two thousand dollars!
Zhao Benshan: I'm 2500!
Fan Wei: 3000 pounds!
Zhao Benshan: 3500!
Fan Wei: 4000 pounds!
Zhao Benshan: 4500!
Fan Wei: 5000 pounds!
Zhao Benshan: Look!
Fan Wei: No, I am an elf myself!
Zhao Benshan: Then you are in a mess!
Fan Wei: Stop it, 2000, 2500, 3000, 3500, 4000, 4500, 5000!
Zhao Benshan: Yes!
Fan Wei: Yes,
Wang Xiaohu: I remember wrong, the host shouted!
Fan Wei: No, no, big brother, I dialed 4000, but you dialed 5000 directly, right? Right?
Audience: Yes! ! ~~~~~~~~~~
Zhao Benshan: Well, it's a mess. Since my brother and I agreed to collect it, let's shout it again and find out who called this 5000. That! ~ ~ What's the starting price?
Cai Weili: In 2000!
Fan Wei: I'm 2000 years old!
Zhao Benshan: Deal! It's not messy this time!
Fan Wei: No, aren't you going to call?
Zhao Benshan: Yes, I'm afraid I'm confused!
Fan Wei: Ah! Don't move! This wheelchair is mine!
Zhao Benshan: I'm telling you, bro, you shouldn't ask you for money. You are still very proud. You should take care of people, but ~ ~
Fan Wei: But if I give it to you, I will be fooled!
Zhao Benshan: I tell you, I didn't think about it at first ~ ~
Fan Wei: Er, er, er, you changed it to Rob, didn't you?
Zhao Benshan: You are mistaken!
Fan Wei: Come on. From the moment you entered the room, you used a painful plan. When you were caught, you used many skills. Master and apprentice cooperated with the plan to smash the car and suddenly dropped the mallet. I only used one plan!
Zhao Benshan: To the end!
Fan Wei: This is a plan for you!
Zhao Benshan: Walking is the best policy!
Fan Wei: No!
Zhao Benshan: I failed. Do you know why I failed? He is a chef who only reads the art of war without reading the menu. Get out!
Cai Weili and Wang Xiaohu: Master! ! ! ~~~~~~~~~
Zhao Benshan: What are you doing? Where are you kneeling? I'm here!
Wang Xiaohu: Master, I'm sorry. Your flickering IQ is so low that I can't learn anything from you!
Cai Weili: What should you do? You will miss the no.2 bus soon!
Zhao Benshan: Sad!
Wang Xiaohu Cai Weili: Master, my disciples worship me!
Zhao Benshan: Aye aye! The world is crazy. Rats are the bridesmaids of cats! Oh, my God!
Cai Weili and Wang Xiaohu: Master, please accept us!
Fan Wei: Er, er, er, children, this book is still endless. It is good to learn it well. I'll give you a new year's red envelope, ah, a red envelope!
Zhao Benshan: Can you take this money? Didn't I pay you both last month? Sad, really sad!
Fan Wei: Come on, everybody, take it!
And: Master Xie!
Cai Weili and Wang Xiaohu: Master, take it down!
Zhao Benshan: Ha ha ha villain!
Fan Wei: Alas, it is impossible to prevent! But I refuse to obey you. I'm still in a wheelchair, aren't I?
Zhao Benshan: What do you want?
Fan Wei: What about your promise? Where is your stretcher?
Zhao Benshan: Develop it yourself!
Fan Wei: Hmm!
Zhao Benshan: This is customized for you. If it is short, it can be lengthened!
Fan Wei: Yes, you took great pains for me. Thanks to my superior plan, I opened the red envelope!
Zhao Benshan: Huh?
Fan Wei: During the Spring Festival, I send you a pair of couplets: "Turn around for a year and shake your destiny for a year. Thank you! "
Zhao Benshan: I'll give you another rhetorical question: "Self-taught"!
Make a new year call
Zhao Benshan: What are you dragging?
Gao Xiumin: Why are you so slow?
Zhao Benshan: How fast can I fly?
Gao Xiumin: Why don't you know that you are in a hurry? Our fish pond is about to expire, and the brother-in-law of the township head is in a hurry. He wants to sign a contract, so why don't we talk to the flight attendant?
Zhao Benshan: It's no use talking now that it's time to talk!
Gao Xiumin: Let's finally fight for it!
Zhao Benshan: You are too picky. Fight for your New Year's Day. It's a shame to bring two assholes.
Gao Xiumin: If you want to rely on me, you shouldn't take both of them.
Zhao Benshan: What are you filming?
Gao Xiumin: Gifts are out of fashion now. People pay attention to emotional communication.
Zhao Benshan: Check the ditch?
Gao Xiumin: Use language. Say something nice.
Zhao Benshan: That's it. You let me play with the fish pond, which makes me play with the language better.
Gao Xiumin: Compared with what?
Zhao Benshan: You can't find the north in the Antarctic with a blind pestle. You can't open your legs when practicing cerebral thrombosis. You can't see the beauty in cheongsam. You can't reach your mouth when you let Pan Changjiang kiss Zheng Xiahai.
Gao Xiumin: I'm talking about you, you, it's no use doing the same thing. Listen, old man. Don't talk about things after we enter the room. Let's put on our hats and say a few more words to celebrate the New Year. As long as the township head is happy, communication is almost the same.
Zhao Benshan: Does the man in the hat give you pleasure?
Gao Xiumin: Well, don't mention his township head. Even if the president puts a top hat on him, he will be happy, Charles de Gaulle!
Zhao Benshan: Oh ~
Gao Xiumin: Knock.
Zhao Benshan: Gee, I'm afraid to meet the leader ~ ~ ~
Gao Xiumin: Remember, don't talk about anything before entering the house. Look me in the eye.
Zhao Benshan: Yeah ~ You knock ~
Fan Wei: Oh, I'm back ~ ~ ~ And you are?
Gao Xiumin: I'm your aunt.
Fan Wei: Auntie?
Gao Xiumin: Ah, we used to be friends. Xiaomi raised you, and your beard is full of stories. Do you remember?
Fan Wei: Which family do you come from?
Gao Xiumin: Lao Gaojia in the east, the first one that comes in, three big tile houses, and my father.
Zhao Benshan: Nicknamed Tall Russian!
Fan Wei: Ouch ~ What is this?
Gao Xiumin: He is my father.
Zhao Benshan: The tall Russian is my uncle. No, I am his father's father-in-law. No, his father is my father-in-law We were originally a match.
Gao Xiumin: Township Head, if I am here, you have to call him an old uncle! Come and meet.
Zhao Benshan: Uncle ~ Happy New Year ~
Gao Xiumin: On the contrary, he called you an old uncle.
Zhao Benshan: Haha.
Gao Xiumin: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Fan Wei: Haha.
Zhao Benshan: Did you let in?
Fan Wei: This old man?
Gao Xiumin: Come in, flight attendant. What are you still doing outside?
Fan Wei: Whose home is this?
Zhao Benshan: Sit down!
Fan Wei: Oh.
Gao Xiumin: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Zhao Benshan: Ha ha ha.
Gao Xiumin: Township Head, do you remember?
Fan Wei: Oh, I still don't remember.
Gao Xiumin: Did I see you off the day you went to middle school? I'll see you off on the way when you leave. When you turned around, you waved to the villagers. At that time, my aunt was silent and tears fell.
Zhao Benshan: Do you have camel bells in your ears?
Gao Xiumin: Remember?
Fan Wei: Ah ~ I remember the lyrics ~ but you still don't remember them.
Gao Xiumin: No wonder you don't remember. You said I was in my thirties when you were in middle school, and I'm 50 this year.
Zhao Benshan: I am 56 years old.
Gao Xiumin: Who asked you?
Zhao Benshan: Whether you ask me or not, I am 56 years old. I am a chicken ~
Gao Xiumin: You said you wanted to talk about this man. Nowhere to see. We haven't seen each other for 20 years. You said you became a township head. Why go there to argue?
Fan Wei: I, the township head, have nothing to defend?
Zhao Benshan: What's it called? Fan Xiangchang was born to be an official. Have you forgotten? I chose you as the head of the township that year. Am I the representative of the village?
Fan Wei: Ah, yes, yes,
Zhao Benshan: I remember it rained in July that year. That guy was crying from morning till noon, and then there was a loud noise and Fan Xiangchang was born.
Fan Wei: You didn't say I was struck by lightning, did you?
Gao Xiumin: Oh, township head, he didn't mean that. What he means is: it thundered, and Fan became the township head and led the peasant revolution ~
"Ladies and gentlemen, hello everyone! Now you are watching the outdated column "Nonsense" of CCTV, and I am the host of the program, Xiao Cui! Today, I have the honor to invite two famous old people-Uncle Blue Sky and Aunt Baiyun. Here are two old people, welcome. (The song of the matador rings? Closed and steep? Narrow? Are Thumb and Baba dead? " Live broadcast?
& amp
Nbsp In Cui Yongyuan's introduction, Zhao Benshan and Song Dandan played the roles of "blue sky" and "white clouds" respectively, and told the audience about the life changes and social events of the old couple in 2006 by dancing the tango. Some focus events in the entertainment circle this year have also become the focus of these three people's "chatter". "
Zhao Benshan: "Hello, leading comrades, 0606 is amazing. Liu Xiang broke the record and beat the gringo. Yao Ming is a basketball player. He learned to use his head when playing. Shenzhou VI went to heaven, all by superb technology. People work hard to get rich, so they don't have to worry about food and clothing. The prosperity of the country depends entirely on the leadership of the party. Looking at the world trend, China has the best development! "
Cui Yongyuan: "In today's society, firstly, you can't trust advertisements; secondly, you can't trust weather forecasts; thirdly, you can't trust entertainment reports."
Zhao Benshan: Not to mention Xiao Cui, you don't know. Your aunt stares at entertainment reports on TV and newspapers every day. Very cute.
Song Dandan: "After Zhao Zhongxiang, I have been looking for someone to fill the vacant idol position in my heart."
Zhao Benshan: "You said that in this entertainment circle, yesterday, some people beat and scolded reporters and played big cards. Today, someone had plastic surgery and got pregnant ... You said, Xiao Cui, why are there so few female directors in China? "
Song Dandan: "After Zhao Zhongxiang, I like Huang Jianxiang who knows football."
Cui Yongyuan: "They all belong to the Xiang generation. Didn't see it, does Aunt still like idolization? "
Song Dandan: "I heard that Huang Jianxiang divorced his wife and gave up his children since he fell in love with that super girl."
Cui Yongyuan: "Yes, there was a commentary activity in the World Cup later."
Song Dandan: "After I came back, I couldn't understand football. I went to Deyun Society to talk about cross talk. "
Cui Yongyuan: "It is reported that he resigned in CCTV."
Zhao Benshan: "I said I was concentrating on writing a book. The title of this book has been decided. The title is "Why did I say this at the World Cup?"? "
Cui Yongyuan: That's it, "Penalty! Penalty! Grosso has done meritorious service, long live the great Italy! Long live the great Italian left back! At this time, the left-back was possessed by the soul, Maldini ... "
Song Dandan: "Yes, yes, that's right. I watched it with your uncle in the middle of the night. His howling woke up my grandson. "
Zhao Benshan: "Many car alarms broke down that night."
Talk about sth.
[Baiyun]: Don't eat. You said you ate three boxes in such a short time. You made the auditorium smell of leeks everywhere. You didn't like to come out with you. You said your score was too low.
Alas! Remember, when recording programs in the future, don't talk too much, do you listen? Don't tell the truth like Tieling platform. That's a real pity. Watch me deal with him, okay? Don't say anything, okay? Good boy.
Alas! Why don't you think this trav has come yet? It's so rude to treat people like wrists! When people waited for us at Tieling Station for several hours, you said it on CCTV. ...
[Cui Yongyuan] Ouch! Sorry everyone, sorry I'm late, sorry. You know, I didn't sleep well last night. Ouch! Aunt and uncle are here!
[Baiyun] is coming.
Hello, Aunt Cui Yongyuan.
[Baiyun] Ah, hello.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hello, uncle ...
[Baiyun] Oh, you should start soon. Ah, there are two columns below us. Ah, both. Come out. Both Beijing TV and Tianjin TV have to give some face to this. Say your opening remarks quickly. Let's get started, ah.
[Cui Yongyuan] is more familiar than me. Dear friends, welcome to "Xiao Cui tells stories" ...
[Black soil] Hiccup!
[Cui Yongyuan] Six years ago, I interviewed an old couple from the Northeast, so ...
[Black soil] Hiccup!
Cui Yongyuan: Six years have passed. What changes have they made? today ...
[Black soil] Hiccup!
[Cui Yongyuan] I ... I ...
All right.
[Baiyun] The wind is very strong. Keep talking about yours.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hey, I don't know what to say.
[Baiyun] You said you were a good host, and your adaptability was poor. You were cheated by several hiccups. Guess what? Sit down and I'll interview you first.
[Cui Yongyuan] Okay.
What's the matter, Trey? I haven't seen you for six years. I heard you were depressed?
[Cui Yongyuan] It's all spread to Tieling?
[Baiyun] Are you better?
[Cui Yongyuan] Much better!
[Baiyun] Don't pretend, you put your uncle and aunt here. What are you pretending to be? It's all written on your face.
[Black Soil] Yes, your face used to be in distress situation, but now it looks like an emergency party.
[Cui Yongyuan] Tieling people love to brag too much. Because:
[Baiyun] Take a present. I will bring you a holiday souvenir. Junior, you said ... (Black soil takes out lunch box) What the hell? This is really you ... (black soil takes out a book) quite memorable.
[Cui Yongyuan] Oh, auntie, this book Confucius has been published.
[Baiyun] Look at the title page.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hey.
[Baiyun] Title page.
[Cui Yongyuan] "I want to give this book to Xiao Cui who is bothering me. I hope you can finish reading this book ... If you don't wake up, Aunt Baiyun will be elegant. " thank you
[Baiyun] What else! What else! You take it ... you pay. (Black Soil takes out handkerchief)
[Cui Yongyuan] Ouch, uncle! Isn't this the handkerchief that those two people turned over?
[black soil] gatekeeper face.
[Cui Yongyuan] "Turn around, shake it, exercise and fall asleep every day, and the black soil is elegant." Thank you, uncle and aunt. You brought me a present. Thank you.
[Black Soil] I haven't seen you for years. Your aunt said to bring something for the children ... (Look at the white clouds, go back to your seat)
[Baiyun] Oh, we were just worried that you didn't sleep here.
[Cui Yongyuan] Gee, my uncles and aunts are still concerned about my sleep. How about your parents' sleep quality?
[Black Soil] I feel sleepy as soon as I touch the pillow.
[Baiyun] Heartless people have high sleep quality.
[Cui Yongyuan] Yes, a narrow-minded person like me can't sleep.
[Baiyun] didn't say you.
[Cui Yongyuan] Ah, uncle, have you been happy these six years?
[Black Soil] Happy! I sing a duet with a dozen old ladies every day ... (White clouds stare at black soil)
[Baiyun] He is engaged in his folk art and I am engaged in my publications. We care about each other in life and help each other in career. How can I describe it to you? ...
[Black soil] I can make do with it, but how can I leave it?
[Cui Yongyuan] Actually, I heard that there are some emotional problems between uncles and aunts.
[Baiyun] gossip, absolute gossip, leaders without news are not leaders, celebrities without gossip are not celebrities, it is difficult to be a man, it is difficult to be a woman ... [Black soil] It is difficult to be a famous old woman.
[Cui Yongyuan] As you can see, this uncle is full of truth. Fortunately, I have prepared a trick. Hey, let's do it another way, aunt and uncle. My aunt wore this earphone when I asked my uncle, and my uncle wore this earphone when I asked my aunt. OK or not? Listen to music and relax.
Button him up.
[Cui Yongyuan] Here, put it on.
[Black soil] (put on) Oops (take off), it's too loud!
[Baiyun] Why do you say so much when I tell you to shut up? Hey, hey, go ahead, Cui.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hey, Auntie, how did you get here this time?
[Baiyun] We ... came by special plane.
[Cui Yongyuan] That's too expensive, so we can't afford it.
[Baiyun] Don't report it, it's all small money. Now you have money. Look at what you're wearing. You're quite rich. Hey, it's so rich. Alas, they are all quite expensive. ...
[Cui Yongyuan] You are a mink!
[Baiyun] Wrong! Mink cashmere
[Cui Yongyuan] Is it expensive?
[Baiyun] Not expensive, 40,000.
[Cui Yongyuan] Forty thousand dollars is not expensive, is it? Aunt is really willing to spend money on herself!
[Baiyun] Woman, be hard on yourself.
[Cui Yongyuan] May I ask my uncle again?
[Baiyun] OK.
[Cui Yongyuan] Listen to music.
(Take off the black earth headphones)
[Baiyun] I asked you, it's your turn.
[Black soil] This sound is quite loud.
[Cui Yongyuan] Uncle, I heard that you came to Beijing by special plane this time?
[Black Soil] Ah, this is a brick tractor.
[Cui Yongyuan] It's so cold.
[Black Soil] She wears a lot. Everything is against the wind. Look at her clothes.
[Cui Yongyuan] Aunt, is this dress expensive?
[Black soil] Old and expensive! I rented it for forty-one days.
[Cui Yongyuan] Rent? How's it going? Did it work? Still have to ask. Ah, I'll ask my aunt again. Listen to music.
[Baiyun] What are you laughing at? I think something is happening here. Look at my gesture.
[Black soil] Got it.
[Baiyun] You ask, Cui.
Aunt Cui Yongyuan, let's talk about your book.
[Baiyun] Books?
[Cui Yongyuan] Mm-hmm.
[Baiyun] There are many things to say when telling stories. So, where do we start?
[Cui Yongyuan] Let's start with the signature book.
[Baiyun] Signing book?
[Cui Yongyuan] Ah.
[Baiyun] That guy had a big scene the day he signed the book! That's really: gongs and drums are loud, firecrackers are ringing, red flags are flying and people are crowded. Pushing me under the table, the pile of books fell.
[Cui Yongyuan] Oh. Then I'll ask my uncle again
[Baiyun] OK. Ask you, my book, my book.
[Cui Yongyuan] Ah, you were there the day uncle, uncle and aunt signed books for sale, right?
[Black soil] There is no signature to sell books.
[Cui Yongyuan] No?
[Black soil] It's all for nothing!
[Cui Yongyuan] So, did Aunt just say "a sea of people"?
[Black Soil] Oh, mom, when I heard that all the people in the town who gave books went to get them, I went back to put up the wall. That's in the left building, right building, left building, right building. Later, when I went to the toilet, I saw such a thick stack of books. [Parents high-five]
[Cui Yongyuan] Aunt, give me the earphone.
[Baiyun] The IQ is quite high.
[Black soil] Yes.
[Cui Yongyuan] That's the way it is. Just now, I asked my uncle and aunt the same question.
[Baiyun] Yes!
[Cui Yongyuan] But you two answer. ...
[Baiyun] Yeah.
[Cui Yongyuan] Not at all. Well, I'll put on my headphones and listen to music. You work in pairs.
[Baiyun] No, why, what did you say? How did we get here?
[Black Soil] I came by tractor.
[Baiyun] Where's my skirt?
[black soil] rented for forty-one days.
[Baiyun] Where's my book?
[Black Soil] I did what you did. Didn't you say you were completely glued to the wall? Finally, read in the toilet.
[Baiyun] I told you not to tell the truth. Why can't you remember?
[Black Soil] Then you can't help it. His things have been detained. The child doesn't behave well at school! I said he would go. Trav.
(Cui Yongyuan takes off her headphones)
[Black soil] You put it on. (Thumbs up) You are a bad student, you are so insidious! Don't blame you for not being able to sleep. You have too many brains. You should, ah!
[Cui Yongyuan] Ah, thank you!
[Baiyun] Their hosts are like this! I'm telling you, from now on, don't say a word, don't say a word, do you hear me, remember? Say something!
[Black Soil] Why don't you shut up? !
[Baiyun] It's too difficult to cooperate with you. You said I had no tacit understanding in my life! Trey, take it off.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hey (takes off headphones).
[Baiyun] Let's continue to talk.
[Cui Yongyuan] Good! Then I'll ask uncle another question.
(Black soil indicates that Cui Yongyuan can't speak)
[Cui Yongyuan] Huh?
[Baiyun] Huh?
[Cui Yongyuan] Ah, what's the matter, uncle? (Black soil covering her mouth)
[Baiyun] Ah, he has a stomachache. Say you have a stomachache.
(Black soil covers the stomach)
[Baiyun] Why is it still drooping?
[Black soil] (clutching his stomach) Where is the stomach?
[Cui Yongyuan] Oh, aunt, your family education is really strict! No matter where you hurt your uncle, he will get hurt.
[Baiyun] No, he's, uh, not feeling well. Ask me.
[Cui Yongyuan] I just read your book. The first chapter is called "going home". Probably the last time I went back to Tieling after the performance. Is it particularly spectacular?
How can [Baiyun] be called "special" spectacular? That is "quite" spectacular! That guy, it's a big scene, really: gongs and drums are loud, firecrackers are ringing, red flags are flying and people are crowded, so ...
[Black Soil] Xiao Cui, I beg you, let me put this thing on!
[Baiyun] (takes off headphones) Is what I said false?
[Black soil] Really.
[Baiyun] You don't listen, do you?
[Black soil] Yes.
[Baiyun] Then why are you hiding it? !
[Black soil] I have a stomachache.
[Baiyun] Why is it so annoying? Cui, keep asking. Ignore him, he has never seen the world.
[Cui Yongyuan] I know. In fact, my aunt has seen a lot of the world since she became a celebrity. Does she take part in many activities?
[White clouds] Quite a lot. All day, we just performed everywhere, gave speeches and cut the ribbon.
[Cui Yongyuan] A lot of appearance fees, right?
[Black Soil] She is eighty and I am forty.
[Baiyun] After tax.
[Cui Yongyuan] Where did you cut the ribbon?
[Baiyun] Both are large and medium-sized enterprises.
[Black soil] Pancake shops, blacksmith furnaces and so on.
[Baiyun] Ah ... There is a big chicken farm in our country, and I cut it all down.
[Black Soil] Yes, she got bird flu the day after she cut it. At that time, more than 10,000 chickens died, and finally she was nicknamed "Yijian".
[Baiyun] Will you suffocate if you don't talk? Can I choke you? !
[Black Soil] I can restrain madness.
[Baiyun] Why is it so annoying? You said you were. ...
[Black Soil] Tell the truth ...
[Baiyun] I don't want to say that your business has dragged you down and saved your face. (To Cui Yongyuan) I don't want to say anything about him! You said it was just him, so people could go out and sing. Can you sing with this voice? That day, I went to our nursing home to sing for others. There are seven old people sitting under this group of people. He shouted loudly and fainted.
Cui Yongyuan: Isn't there another one?
[Baiyun] There is another dean who won't let go of my hand. That guy can shake it hard. "Elder sister, this eldest brother's voice is too sudden. I can't take it anymore. Let big brother go home quickly. People sing for money. He sings badly! "
[Black Soil] Hello! You must give a speech in a mental hospital.
[Baiyun] Yeah.
[black soil] said a day and a night.
[Baiyun] What's the matter? All the mental patients were discharged from the hospital.
[Cui Yongyuan] Effective.
[Black Soil] The doctor is crazy.
[Baiyun] Which doctor is crazy, let me ask you?
[Black Soil] Dr. Cui is crazy.
[Baiyun] Dr. Cui? !
[black soil] Dr. Xiao Cui.
[Baiyun] How can you talk so irresponsibly? You said you ... Trey, don't eat your heart. He didn't say anything about you. So ... What about this Alzheimer's disease? I forgot to take my medicine when I went out. Cui, let's continue to talk about literature so as not to interrupt him. Why is it so annoying? You said you ...
Cui Yongyuan] So, Auntie, shall we talk about your book?
[Baiyun] Yeah.
[Cui Yongyuan] I heard that your Zi Yue Ⅱ is being written.
[Baiyun] There are more than ten thousand words 10 before the deadline.
[Black Soil] Oh, my God ~ ~ ~
[Baiyun] What's the matter? !
[Black soil] I have a stomachache.
[Baiyun] Hold on! ! (To Cui Yongyuan) You ask! !
[Cui Yongyuan] Ouch! (The book falls to the ground)
[Baiyun] Go ahead, Cui. You keep asking.
[Cui Yongyuan] I heard that, er, readers are particularly looking forward to it?
[Baiyun] How do you say "special" expectations? That's "quite" expectation! That guy, er, wanted to watch Zi Yue Er after watching Zi Yue Yi, but he held back.
[Black Soil] Well, it's true. That's quite uncomfortable! Well, when the village chief came to my house, he blocked the door and told you, "Don't let your wife go anywhere, just write Zi Yue II, because there is no paper in the village chief's toilet."
[Baiyun] Xiao Cui, I implore you that CCTV will ban me. I'm leaving. I'm not recording.
[Cui Yongyuan] Hey, how did Aunt leave again?
[Black Soil] What are you doing?