Sister Mei, who is 38 years old and has been married for 15 years, told me her story.

Fifteen years ago, when she had just graduated from college, she met her boss, who was 5 years older than her, and they soon fell in love. At that time, everyone was not optimistic about office romance, but Sister Mei got happily married after a year of dating.

After she got married and became pregnant, because the fetal heart rate was unstable, Sister Mei quit her job and devoted herself to home care. After having two children in three years, Sister Mei concentrated on raising her children at home. After her eldest daughter went to kindergarten and her younger son could walk, she wanted to go to work, but found that she could not find a suitable job at all. Moreover, hiring a nanny is expensive, so I don’t feel comfortable asking my mother-in-law to take care of her. After discussing it with her husband, Sister Mei started living as a housewife.

In those few years, my husband's career was on the rise, and the children were not honest when sleeping. They would get up and make trouble almost every hour at night. In order to ensure her husband's sleep, she took the initiative to sleep in separate beds.

In the first few years, my husband had a good career, was not short of money, and often loved Sister Mei. But later, my husband's company became less and less profitable, and his income became less and less, while the family's expenses became more and more expensive. Sometimes, when Sister Mei wants to buy something, her husband will get angry and scold her for not knowing how to run a household, thinking that the money comes from the strong wind.

Sister Mei, who had no financial income, would complain and argue with him at first, saying that being a housewife was not that easy. Later, I didn't even bother to argue. Since you are the father of the child and my husband, you have the obligation to pay for our lives.

Under this concept, Sister Mei and her husband went from sleeping in separate beds to a completely sexless marriage. For nearly 6 years, they had never lived as a couple.

At the beginning, Sister Mei felt that her husband was a scumbag, a man who had no ability and only blamed his wife for being useless. Later, when I was looking at my daughter's homework, I saw that in the essay "My Mom and Dad" she wrote, she said, "Mom is a useless woman. She only scolds me and my brother and asks dad to get money to spend." And "Dad It’s very hard, and I have to go home very late every day.” Sister Mei felt that her years of hard work had been a waste of time, but after thinking about it, her daughter’s description seemed to be correct.

Although there are many trivial things in the life of a housewife, it is not that she has no time at all. It’s just that she gossips more in WeChat groups or watches dramas on her mobile phone. The meals I cook are basically the same as they have been for several years, with no innovation. Even though her clothes are washed by hand and the floor is mopped every day, she doesn't have a good face. She often scolds her husband for not caring about the family and scolds her children for being disobedient.

Sister Mei said that if a woman wants to gain the filial piety of her children and the love of her husband, the key lies in what she does herself. After learning from the pain and feeling that if she continued like this, she would end up with divorce, she began her own transformation process.

When it comes to family eating and drinking, I have downloaded a lot of food software. I spend my time watching TV dramas and gossiping carefully cooking the food my children like to eat, and I have also learned more and more home-cooked dishes. Although there was a period of dark cooking at the beginning, gradually the children became better and better at eating. Even my husband, who had not had dinner at home for many years, often came home from get off work on time for dinner.

To lock a man’s heart, you must first learn to lock his stomach. The reason why most men are afraid of going home is often because they can only eat leftovers when they go home. Then I thought about it. During the day, I was scheming at work to make some money, but when I got home at night, I didn't even have hot food. Even if my wife was exhausted after a day at home, could he feel the same way? I just think she is incompetent.

Sister Mei has also begun to clean up her external image. Although she stays at home almost every day, she no longer only wears home clothes, but occasionally goes out to get her hair done and treat herself. Pay attention to personal care as well. Sometimes I even ask my husband on WeChat if a certain skirt looks good. Although he would not be very enthusiastic, but when he came back from get off work every day and saw Sister Mei tidying up, a smile gradually appeared in the corner of his mouth. Sometimes she would even joke about whether she wanted to do a live broadcast.

Men are still visual animals. Even if you have been with him for more than ten years, he still wants you to be beautiful. At least, once or twice once in a while, it would be a beautiful thing to be able to remind him of the way he was when he was passionately in love.

The mentality of a housewife is very important. After changing her mentality, Sister Mei began the path of self-improvement and self-improvement. Although her husband has always said that she does not need her to make money, when she actually achieved some small results in writing and gained some income through writing on self-media, her husband said that he did not like her, but he obviously cared about her. Sister Mei's attitude has changed a lot.

In marriage, men don’t actually need how much money you make. More often, they want you to feel the same way. Rather than treating a man as a cash machine, he hopes you understand that making money is not easy.

Sister Mei said that it took her less than half a year to resolve the sexless marriage for so many years. I originally thought that when the children grew older, the only option would be divorce. Now, her marriage is revitalized and her husband is interested in her again.

Actually, things in marriage are far from that difficult. When you notice something is wrong in your marriage, you can definitely find the reason. As long as you boldly admit it and solve it with your heart, a beautiful spring will always come.