For example, if the refrigerator plug is broken, she takes out a new one from the storage room and plugs it in. As a result, her parents were shocked when they found out that their daughter actually had super living ability. Her father quickly made a circle of friends, touting the local flavor. How happy it is to have a little gifted scholar at home.
Mopping the floor at home, dad said: A Zi wants to work when he grows up. I drank some wine excitedly while eating, and shed the most worthless tears of middle-aged macho men. She:?
My parents will whisper when they see beautiful ladies when they brush videos: it's not as good as my daughter, hahaha. She cooks instant noodles, and her parents think she is a living kitchen god, comparable to the gourmet Wang Gang.
I think it's funny and warm, but I didn't expect the praise comment to be: I want to know what it feels like to be praised since I was a child. My family says I can't do this or that. Not very flattering. I have a low self-esteem since I was a child, and I can't be confident in my twenties.
The second comment is that it is always better to praise the parents of children than to belittle and insult their parents. I envy them. I'm tired of growing up in denial.
Our tradition in China is modesty and introversion, which leads many parents not to praise their children actively. Growing up, I have never seen any parents praise their children. Even if outsiders praise their children, parents always find excuses to belittle them.
"Your children work really neatly every day and help you with the housework." "No, she is too lazy every day."
"Your son has a good academic record, unlike my family." "He won't learn. Just don't hold him back. "
It turns out that so many people have never been praised by their parents.
What is rainbow fart?
Some people say that parents' praise is an understatement, so I envy the feeling of being blown rainbow fart. What does rainbow fart mean?
Young people all know what this stalk is. Rainbow fart is a buzzword in rice circles, which refers to fancy touting one's idol. Idols are good at everything, but they are full of advantages. Even if an idol farts, it can be blown into a rainbow without changing color.
Whether for children or adults, rainbow fart can make people feel happy, break the embarrassment and close the distance.
Why do you blow rainbow fart on children?
1. Children who receive repressive education spend their whole lives trying to please others.
Scientist James said: "The most ardent requirement in human nature is the desire to be affirmed."
Man is a gregarious creature, and the relationship between people is complicated. Everyone needs to be affirmed all his life. If he was never affirmed as a child, he would unconsciously please others.
2. Children who are not recognized since childhood may lose the ability to love.
I once watched a program in which a man just couldn't love his parents, wife and children. Even after a long business trip, he won't think of calling home. He is very indifferent to his family.
Later, he revealed his wishes. This man has never been recognized by his parents or praised since he was a child. It's all denial and criticism. No matter how well he did, his parents were not satisfied.
Psychologist gary Chapman put forward five languages to express love in his book Five Languages of Love, one of which is "affirmative language".
When you find that a child likes to be praised and recognized, words of encouragement and affirmation represent the love in his heart. On the other hand, if he can't get the affirmation and recognition from his parents, he thinks that his parents don't love him or he doesn't deserve to be loved.
If a person loses the ability to love, how can he love others? How can a family be happy?
3. Parents' approval is the foundation for children to face life.
I once read a girl's self-report. Her family's economic conditions are good, and her parents have trained her to be a child of others, and her work is good. However, one problem is that she is always eager for praise, whether at work or at home. She said that although she was very successful, she always felt that she was not recognized enough.
Later, she talked to her parents, who admitted that although they were proud of her, they didn't like to praise her, and parents shouldn't praise their children.
Later, no matter her marriage or job changes, she was always unhappy and very insecure.
If a child can get enough sense of security from his family, it will be their greatest confidence in facing the society in the future.
Complete quotations from rainbow fart.
First, the rainbow fart of divergent thinking
Dig the key points: use questions to distract children's thinking and guide them to recall what they did well and how they did it.
1. You dress quickly in the morning. How did you do it so fast? I will be happy to think that I have improved my speed.
You finished your homework before seven o'clock tonight. How did you manage to be so efficient? I will be happy to remember myself and pay attention to it. )
Mom found that you played the piano fluently today. How did you do it so well? Do you practice secretly and try to surprise your mother? (Instill the idea of silently trying to amaze others)
While you were studying, your brother was talking loudly outside, which didn't affect your attention. What's the secret of your concentration? Use positive words, such as concentration, self-drive and self-discipline, so that children can understand their meanings and try to imitate them. )
Mom noticed that you have been stuffing autumn clothes into your pants these two days. How did you form this good habit? Didn't you always feel trouble before? (Help children to sort out their habits, and children will analyze why they do this, for example, their stomachs are not easy to catch cold in winter. )
6. Sister, you always help your mother take care of your brother. How can you help your mother share so much?
7. You made only one mistake in today's oral calculation. How did you achieve 99% accuracy?
I just saw you sharing your food with your brother. I think you are very generous. How did you come up with the idea of sharing? (Guide children to understand the meaning of generosity and sharing)
9. You got a hundred points in this exam. I admire you very much. How do you skillfully use what you have learned? (Guide children to sum up experience and summarize each exam. )
Second, intelligent rainbow fart
Tap the key point: what do you want your child to do, such as self-discipline, such as punctuality. Then use a magnifying glass to discover more advantages of children. Then tell him more about what you want him to do.
1. Mom found that when you did your homework today, you prepared all the school supplies and books before you started. This is called being organized.
It only took you ten minutes to get dressed and get up this morning. This is called efficiency.
I noticed that you picked up all the scraps of paper that you made by hand today. This is what we often say, how can we sweep the world without sweeping a house?
I noticed that you corrected the mistakes in oral calculation seriously, which is called self-discipline.
I noticed that you did the math problem and circled the problem seriously. This is called being serious.
I noticed that you took the initiative to drink two glasses of water today, which is called being responsible for your health.
I found that you only spent half an hour doing your homework today. This is efficient time management.
I noticed that in the past two days, because the teacher said you played the piano well, you practiced the piano more actively. This is called internal drive.
9. Mom saw that you corrected your brother's problem today, and his brother listened to you. This is called brothers and friends, and brothers respect each other like guests. Mom is very happy to see you like this.
10, mom found out that you ate all the rice in the bowl today, which is called not wasting.
1 1. It's called filial piety when mom sees you helping grandma with things.
12, I saw you watch two episodes of Peggy, and you turned off the projector yourself. This is called keeping the agreement.
13. Mom saw that you were sitting correctly in the class video today, and your answer was very positive, which is the basis for listening carefully.
Third, thank you rainbow fart.
Digging key points: with a grateful heart, look at the advantages of children with a magnifying glass, and sincerely thank them for choosing me as their parents.
1, thank you for doing your mother a big favor, studying by yourself and letting her mother handle the work at hand.
Thank you for taking my advice and sorting out your schoolbags in advance so that we don't have to go out in a hurry.
Thank you for taking your brother to study. The little teacher did a decent job.
Thank you for teaching my mother to play this song. Can you play it for me again?
Thank you for finishing your homework efficiently in 30 minutes, which didn't give us more time to do what we wanted to do.
6. Thank you for being so diligent, so that I don't work so hard.
7. Thank you for helping me manage my brother. My mother thinks you are my best assistant.
Thank you, brother, for giving each of us a hug every day. We should learn from our younger brother.
9. The last sentence is on my lips: Thank you for choosing me as your mother.
Fourth, competent rainbow fart
Knock on the key point: the feeling of being trusted is the best. Children should have competent ideas and be willing to take responsibility for everything.
1. Mom believes that you can get dressed and go out before seven o'clock.
I believe you can finish today's math problem by yourself.
I believe you can do the work of sweeping the floor.
Mom believes that you can recite this poem with your younger brother, and recite it quickly and well.
I believe you can actively raise your hand to answer questions in Go class today.
I believe you will get different results in class today than yesterday.
7. I believe you can do it well, no problem.
I believe you can handle this problem well.
I believe you can finish this difficult problem alone today.
10, mom believes that you know how to study is the most efficient.
1 1. We all believe that you can raise this question. Don't worry, you can do it.
Five, the combination of rainbow fart
Knock on the key points: fancy rainbow fart, use exaggeration, and ask for advice modestly.
1. I can't believe you did this. Can you share it? How did you do that?
God, I admire you so much. Are these your own shoes? How can you tell your left foot from your right foot so easily?
Mom, this question is beside the point. Can you tell me something?
Wow, you are really a beautiful little dinosaur. How do you observe so carefully?
6. Mom didn't expect that you really insisted on running 10 lap today. You know, it's really hard. You persisted. Are you tired? Do you feel anything?
Try it quickly, but praise and criticize it in principle, adhere to the principle of "gentleness and firmness" and give children a happy family environment.