When you reach a certain age, almost all the doubts in life can be condensed into one question: How should I live?

So how should we live?

I've seen you thinking about this problem myself, and I'm also confused by it.

Some people long for change because there will be a new beginning; some people seek stability because they want to spend the rest of their lives quietly.

There is a 63-year-old grandmother who has been living a monotonous and boring life. She gets up on time every day, eats on time, cleans the house with a specific detergent, and ensures that everything in the house is spotless. The kitchen tools and water glasses must be arranged in order.

She had to use coasters, etc., and she even worked one by one according to the recorded list to ensure that her day was foolproof.

Because she believes that as long as nothing changes, life can go on forever.

However, how can life be planned with a list?

In the book "The List Life", it is recorded how the 63-year-old grandmother Britt-Marie changed from such a single and boring life, what difficulties did she encounter, and how did she cope with her life in the end?

Author: Frederic Backman, born in Helsingborg, Sweden in 1981, started his career by writing blogs and columns.

After his debut novel "A Man Called Ove Decided to Die" set an astonishing sales record around the world, his second novel "Grandma's Apology Letter" sparked a reading craze again, and Bachman was elected Swedish Writer of the Year; the Chinese version was released only 6 months ago

It has sold more than 500,000 copies, making him extremely popular among Chinese readers.

Bachman's works are full of witty language and always keenly capture the details of daily life, making each character come alive through small movements and micro-expressions.

01 Her list-based life Britt-Marie often makes a memo, which is full of things she needs to do, and she relies on this list to record her day after day.

This is a woman who suffers from mysophobia and obsessive-compulsive disorder. She has formed a fixed view of the world and no one can change her.

Maintain a decent appearance at all times.

Even if blood is left on the floor, it will be too embarrassing. Tears are not allowed to drip on the floor, as that will leave marks and be considered impolite.

She doesn't want to change, and she doesn't want to travel far away to experience a different life. Her ideal is to stay at home and live the same life, making her own bed and cleaning it with baking soda.

She always cares about other people's opinions. For example, if she doesn't turn on the kitchen light at six o'clock in the morning, she will think that others think she will sleep in; if she tells others that she doesn't hate red wine, she will think that others think she is an alcoholic.

You see, there are so many things wrong with her.

Always live for others.

Have you ever met such a person?

Rigid, stubborn, mysophobic or even obsessive-compulsive.

I've been through this and it's really hard to accept.

Because no matter what you do, he will not be satisfied and can pick out the thorns. I remember during that time, I did all the laundry, cooking, and almost all the housework, but in the end he said that I was lazy and not good enough...

.02 Sudden accident, life change But one day, this 63-year-old old woman lost her husband Kent (her husband had an affair and divorced). She had to go out to find a job, leave the life she was familiar with, and live for herself for the first time.

To the town of Borg.

In such a run-down town, a group of almost barbaric and rude people, a drunken disabled woman who had to work together, a group of young football fans who love football and get dirty all day long, life is like that sudden football, a wake-up call.

Then she was forced to face everything in front of her.

From then on, life was no longer just about her husband. A group of children, a woman in a wheelchair, a blind woman who knew football, and a mouse entered her world.

Everything was full of unknown challenges, everything was incredible, and everything just happened. Her life completely changed when she was unwilling to change, and she gained new choices and new expectations out of control.

All marriages have a dark side, as all people have weaknesses.

She would still miss Kent often, and would often compare the people she met with Kent. She would miss some of Kent's habits, and herself living with Kent.

Sometimes it's easier to move on without even knowing who you are.

Mary's life was characterized by living for others.

It turns out that the reason why she became what she is today is because her sister died young and was taken away by a car accident when she was a child. Her parents were heartbroken as to why it was not her sister who survived but her. The family began to break up. She faced the problem since she was a child.

Indifferent parents, being alone, growing up and marrying a chauvinistic husband... The combination of all factors made her who she is today.

Living in the shadow of her sister, longing for her mother's approval, she hoped that Kent could see the clean and bright room because of her. They never said thank you to her, they always chose to ignore it.