Her last ins, still warm in style, took a photo of a fan gift and said, "I accept your confession." Two days later, she chose the most decisive way to say goodbye to this world.
According to the news report, Shirley tied a rope and hanged herself on the lighting in the second floor room.
It is hard to imagine what kind of pain she suffered at the age of 25 before she was willing to give up a good life. Su Li's last public appearance was at the film promotion activity on June 6th of 10. Wearing a white shirt with flounces, she listened attentively to the reporter's questions and smiled as happily as every girl when answering them.
Her death was not without warning.
On 20 17, Su Li posted a video of eating roasted eel on the Internet. She put the peeled eel on the baking tray, and the eel writhed in pain, while Shirley dubbed it with a smile: "Oh, help me, help me!" " "
At that time, most netizens accused Shirley of being too cruel. Shirley replied: "You are even worse!"
Looking back now, it seems like a fantasy. Those fierce cyber violence are not cruel. Like eels, Suli struggled before she died, with self-mutilation scars on her arms. The people next to her witnessed her pain, but they just sneered disdainfully and slowly typed a few words, "Are you sick?" .
People who are idols have always been regarded as bright, versatile and walking with the light, and the audience will instinctively refuse to associate them with words such as pain, depression and depression.
At the age of 1 1, Su Li won the first place in the appearance group at the SM Youth Selection Conference and became a trainee of SM. Although she is very young, she is very popular in the company. When SM celebrates, she can stand in the middle with the President and blow out the candles under the watchful eyes of An Qixuan and Hao Yun.
After joining the women's group f(x), she is the sweet responsibility of the team. 1.72 meters tall, with snow-white skin and a face of classical beauty, even in a sack, it is as beautiful as a fairy. At that time, fans called her "Sister Pocket", which meant I wanted to put her in my pocket and take her away.
Shirley chose to fly solo when f(x) was at its peak, and then let it drift completely. Falling in love, wearing very revealing clothes, talking and joking recklessly, she has stepped on these minefields of "idol disqualification". In the face of overwhelming doubts and abuse, she also appeared indifferent: "I am such a' unique' person, and I am doing very well."
Later, when she participated in the reality show "The Truth Shop", Su Li talked about the reasons for quitting f(x): because she started acting at an early age, no one around her treated her as a child, and the heavy responsibilities that were not in line with her age kept her living in pressure and fear. Until one day she asked herself, "Why did you do this? Why do you want to do this? " She realized that what she had done was not suitable for her.
Not long ago, when she was on the night of bad reviews, she was also very calm and didn't wear underwear, just for comfort and health. Someone asked her, "Is she a person who looks at others?" Su Li replied, "I don't look at other people's glances, and I don't want to look." It is very difficult to find myself, because I will be influenced by others, so it is also a kind of self-defense for me not to look at my eyes. "
She also told a story. In f(x), when everyone is tired, the dance is a bit perfunctory. But SM executives came, and everyone suddenly became very hard at dancing. Shirley is still dancing casually. "If I do this, I feel very hurt my self-esteem."
As a result, after saying this sentence, I was scolded by many people for being unprofessional and loving paddling, which dragged down my teammates.
Actually, many idols will face this problem. Glamour outsiders are made up for fans and businesses, not necessarily what they want. Their real negative emotions have nowhere to vent, and they can't vent. In the long run, like a dammed lake full of water, it will burst one day.
Leslie Cheung once announced his retirement from music. At the end of 1980s, fans clashed with fans in Alan Tam for him many times, which was later embellished by the media and published in newspapers. The siege of gossip made Leslie Cheung very tired.
He said, "Idol is actually a kind of existence that is easily broken after being hurt by rumors. So I want to stop being a singer. "
Leslie Cheung breathed a sigh of relief when he came back again. "I'm not young. There are no old idols anyway. " At this time, he can finally let go to play Farewell My Concubine, wear a long skirt and long hair at the concert, walk into the bright street with a cigarette in his hand, and sing the sentence "I am me, a different color fireworks" to the fans.
If you want to be an idol, you must debut at a young age. At that time, the three views had not yet taken shape, and the most important thing you did was to try your best to cater to the fans. But when they are old and have a self, they will face the conflict between personal hobbies and brokerage affairs and make a choice between family life and career development.
Many idols find themselves suddenly after "idol disqualification". Unfortunately, this self comes too late and too fragile to support the heavy life of dislocation. Leslie Cheung finally played the biggest April Fool's joke with everyone and went with the wind.
Child stars who have entered the circle since childhood are more likely to have such confusion. Ordinary children will have a rebellious period of growth. If they want to be presumptuous and occasionally do something out of line, their family and friends will forgive them. But child stars must never rebel. They must maintain the image of being cute and childlike for many years before they can be recognized by the outside world. The approval of fans. They must also rely on this image to support the family economy.
Roy, 18 years old, smokes a cigarette and attends CCTV news. He must also apologize to everyone. Judy Garland, 16 years old, has been using drugs to slim down and tighten her chest in the film The Wizard of Oz, in order to maintain the lively and lovely girl image in the film (later, drug dependence killed her).
Many child stars suddenly start to rebel when they are adults, preferring to break the jar rather than live in a vacuum idol world.
Britney Spears started dating and getting married at the age of 19. Later, she committed suicide by taking drugs and drinking several times and was in a state of anxiety for a long time. The wrong hairstyle will make her anxious. Rivan Phoenix, who started acting at the age of 9, died at the age of 23. In front of the bar, he suddenly stopped because of overdose. He had hoped to quit the entertainment circle and live on a tropical island. Justin Bieber, 19 years old, started taking drugs, and all his relationships failed. By the age of 20, he had been promiscuous, smoking marijuana, drunk driving and resisting arrest.
Su Li also started from the age of 20, left f(x) and suddenly rebelled. Playing jokes on friends, taking large-scale photos, forcing yourself to eat grapes that can't be stuffed in your mouth, biting cat skin, pointing at the scene and crying, all kinds of seemingly crazy behaviors, in fact, just want to distinguish yourself from the sweet and naive doll in the past.
It's just that wearing a mask for a long time will grow into the meat. The peeling process is very painful and bloody, and even the belt meat may not find a complete self. Some people survived, so they can heal and grow again. Some people can't do it and suddenly give up.
Su Li was still very sad when he talked about being scolded for the party photos. "I feel that many people just put on colored glasses for me, but they will still be sad. I have changed a lot and will change in the future. "
No one can be held responsible for Su Li's death, but I still can't help thinking that if we had encouraged her more and mocked her less, the result would have been different.
Earlier, Su Li went to a variety show, and the reporter asked her what her dreams were. She said, "I hope more people will believe me and then love me."