Ye Qingcheng's anthology keeps missing (turn)

"Qiao Yan, I had a close relationship with you when I didn't know you."

When he 17 was admitted to the university, it was Kang Ding's first trip. The ticket is printed with "ride allowed". Children in rural areas only need to take the train and get approval. When I got on the bus, I suddenly realized that it was a standing ticket. In August, the tin car is a walking oven. It runs like the wind, but stops one station at a time, like life. Gradually, there was a sea of people. In front of him, a thin girl was pushed back and almost stood in his arms. He was too scared to move.

She didn't look back, but the temperature and smell of her body forced her to come over, slightly sweaty. His chest was attached to her back, and he looked down and saw a drop of sweat. Starting from her head, along her braided hair, like a child playing on a slide, he stumbled and fell on the chest of his T-shirt, and the cotton T-shirt was thirsty and immediately sucked dry. All of a sudden, I remembered "a drop of water wears away a stone". Kang Ding thought that the sweat must have penetrated through the T-shirt and penetrated into his heart. It was still deep underground, so he hid a well in his body from now on.

They met again on the platform. They are all freshmen in the Polytechnic University. She only looked at him, unmoved. Disappointed wind in the square, his sweat, inch by inch, so many people in the car, some people crowded in front of her. He doesn't know who is standing behind him ... The world is very complicated, and sharing a car is not fate.

The whole body is getting drier and drier, but there seems to be a faint greasy ring on her chest, which is just a drop of sweat. He never kissed, but he thought, this should be the memory of that kiss.

All registered, top row: Song Qiaoyan, English 923. Next row, Kang Ding, Building 92 1.

"Qiao Yan, most of the families are beautiful: osmanthus blossoms in October, as thin as cuttings. I think of your laurel yellow shirt; 1 1 When the bathhouse opened, the girl who came back from the shower had black hair and wet hair, which reminded me of your sweaty hair tips and a salty stream. I practice in the mold workshop every week. The texture of wood reminds me of your soft and stubborn face, which is ebony. ...

"I can't share this memory with you."

Yes, because nothing happened to them.

During military training, Qiao Yan was petite, which was the most outside of the girls' phalanx. Just walking, when the men's and women's teams meet, Qiao Yan often turns her head unconsciously, which means that the hibiscus is in bud in the fog. My brother, who slept in his lower berth, stared at him now and whispered to him, "I want to chase her."

It's really chasing. The university is in the mountains, and the path is steep and tortuous. My brother rides an electric bicycle at full speed every day, from the girls' dormitory to the teaching building, to the listening classroom, to the canteen, and then to the outside of the gym for a long time. My brother is an expert in sports, and his skin is as bright as paint. His pursuit is more subtle.

I don't say much, just pursue wholeheartedly. The girls laughed and whispered, and finally too many chefs pushed Qiao Yan out of the crowd. Qiao Yan bowed her head awkwardly for a long time, then sat sideways in the back seat of her brother's bicycle, lifted her floral skirt, and revealed her ivory and white two-color patchwork sandals.

Love on campus is often such a simple and clear beginning.

Therefore, Kang Ding and Qiao Yan are very familiar. Sometimes walking on campus, I hear the horn behind me, bypass my brother's bike, ride the wind and waves like a little shark, stick a smart face behind my brother's shoulder, smile at Kang Ding, and then bow my head; My brother also took Qiao Yan back to the dormitory. He was busy here and there. Qiao Yan sat by his bed, kicking the sheets unconsciously with one foot.

Without a word, Qiao Yan in my memory will always be a thousand hibiscus flowers. In the middle of the water, when one flower blooms and the other falls, she holds his heart, but she is a flower watcher on the shore and can't wade to pick it.

In the autumn of the second year of high school, Qiao Yan felt a bad feeling. My brother stayed by her bed all day. However, he can't wait any longer. As soon as I entered the door, I saw Qiao Yan's cheeks thinning. It seems that someone threw a big stone into his heart, and the water overflowed and choked him. Standing far away, Qiao Yan lay half-lying, put her hand in her brother's, and whispered to her brother, "I missed my parents very much when I was sick." When I was a child, every time I was sick, my father would ride a bicycle to the far-away free market to buy fish and cooked soup. It was so fresh ... "

The speed of thinking can't keep up with his footsteps, and the semi-decayed wooden floor of the dormitory echoes. He rushed to the small restaurant at the school gate: "I want fish." The proprietress greeted warmly: "Our specialty here is boiled fish." Poor students, where can I afford a restaurant? At this moment, they want the words to be meaningful: boiled water is naturally very clear soup, and they say, "Good."

28 yuan, his meals for three days.

Another 5 yuan was pledged to borrow someone else's sea bowl, and the proprietress carefully covered him, tied it with a rubber band and put it in a plastic bag. He is afraid of spilling water on the soup, so he must hold the soup in his hand. Maple trees in the campus are grayish red, with swallows returning late and bats flying low in the morning. The celadon bowl gradually warmed up in his hand, but he was sweating like a pig, only worried that my whole heart was cold when I was held in the dormitory.

When the lid of the box was lifted, the spicy fragrance was overflowing, and the red oil floated like wine, which immediately made a room full of people laugh. "Give the patient such spicy food, are you kidding?"

In the evening, my brother asked him out for a walk. There is a long wooden chair by the lake. It was under the wisteria in July, and the waves on the lake were photographed. My brother handed him a cigarette and went straight to the point: "Did you buy that bowl of fish for Qiaoyan today?"

His heart creaked, like a rusted gear, turning with difficulty and being silent.

My brother hit him. "Is it not a little love for children? As for this, can't you say? "

He was caught with stolen goods, retired from the land and waited for the final trial as punishment, but he let go.

"Did you buy it for Xiao Mo? You see, she ate half a bowl by herself today, and everyone will know. Hey, take the initiative and invite people to the movies. What? ..... "？

Xiao Mo? He tried to remember, was he wearing a red T-shirt or a ponytail? Qiao Yan's roommates, bite me, completely dry the fish, with red oil on your lips and thick petals of Du Like. He really can't remember who ate the most. Except Qiao Yan, the other girls make no difference to him.

He said, "Just say yes."

What does he think is love? Probably the same as hope, it doesn't matter if you have it or not. After a long time, there will be.

"Qiao Yan, at that moment, my heart suddenly wavered. The summer when the college entrance examination was released, my cousins shouted downstairs,' Here comes the notice.' I wore slippers on one foot and no slippers on the other, so I rushed out. Forgetting the existence of the stairs, I stepped on the air and rolled down from the second floor, and the hot concrete rushed at me. With a bang, my jeans were burnt, and I struggled to get up, but there was no postman outside the door, so my frightened cousins dared to admit that they were joking with me. My feet are cold, and when I bow my head, blood slowly flows out of my trouser legs, and I don't feel any pain.

"This time in my life, I played a cruel joke with me again."

He and Xiao Mo had been together for two years, and the year of graduation ended in nothing, just like brothers and Qiao Yan. My brother got a scholarship from Birmingham University after getting seven and a half points in IELTS, but Qiao Yan and Joe Yan Dou were silent, without saying goodbye or blessing.

On the day of dinner, my brother only drank two bottles of beer, and it was too high, surprisingly high, painful as hell, his string was broken and his voice was harsh and shocking. The two brothers lost in a row, scolded "shit", jumped up and fought for it, sobbed and dropped cups and plates all over the floor, disposable paper cups, spilled leftover wine and tea on Qiao Yan's skirt, and ignored them.

He avoided looking at his brother's purple and sweaty face and dared not look at Qiao Yan. He just gently handed her a tissue. She took it, didn't wipe it, pinched it into a ball and held it in her hand, lowering her head all the way, as if it had shrunk to nonexistence. She was sitting in the air conditioner, covered by a big cold air conditioner. She was almost out of breath, but still, she was sweating drop by drop, reflecting the light and falling to the ground like a broken heart.

Keep missing (2)

After drinking, the students clamored for singing. Qiao Yan stood up and whispered, "I'll go back first." The brother was so drunk that he woke up for seven minutes when he heard someone hitting him with a mallet. He said thoughtfully, "Go home by yourself." Go straight. It was the deep-sea black pearl that left the clam. From then on, I couldn't sleep in the belly of love, and no matter how painful it was, I never looked back.

Ding Kangdao: "I want to count things, so I won't go either."

Didn't say anything about sending her. Qiao Yan walked ahead, and Kang Ding followed him silently, tandem, just like when they were on the train. This time, they know each other's surnames, but they are far apart. He didn't even dare to step on her shadow for fear of hurting her.

After passing a high wall, Qiao Yan suddenly stopped and looked up. The moonlight was as bright as jade, and she saw a tree sticking out of the wall, with green round fruits hanging on it, such as pears and apples. He leaned down, recognized it for a while and said, "It's a persimmon."

Qiao Yan didn't answer, and her face flickered. Knowing that it was Ye Ying, she also had the illusion that it was tears. As soon as the wind blows, the leaves flutter and carve painful lines on her face.

He couldn't bear to find words: "Our family planted persimmon trees, which were on the threshing floor, so I knew that when I was a child, I used to play under the trees ..."

Qiao Yan suddenly asked, "What do you think of him ... Did he love me?" There are no stars in the night sky of the city.

Before he could answer, Qiao Yan said, "I'm going to return a book to my friend. No need to send it. " The wine stains on the white skirt are particularly dazzling; Just like his old T-shirt with her sweat on it.

That is, all traces of love can be left behind.

"Qiao Yan, you never know how much I want to tell you: every autumn, persimmon fruit turns red slowly in the autumn wind, and it falls out of control, red and sweet. Making wine with persimmons is an ancient custom in my hometown. Whenever we get married, we will take the bride out for dinner. Qiaoyan, you come with me, and I will drink your persimmon wine, which is as sweet as yogurt, and a thousand cups are not drunk. "

Goodbye Qiao Yan, it's been six or seven years.

At that time, he opened a small decoration company and often laughed at himself: he earned a toilet money. There are not many guys in Tong * *. As long as there is a list, he can follow. In July, there was a duplex room to be renovated, and he and his colleagues drove a minivan.

It didn't rain for many days, and the red land cracked countless thirsty mouths. When the nanny answered the door, he sat on the sidewalk and said, "Can I have a glass of ice water?"

Just holding a glass of iced coke, I saw a plain white calf coming downstairs step by step, followed by a dark green silk skirt, which gradually reached the waist with a thin bow, and then I saw a pointed chin. Suddenly, his heart was tied to one end of spider silk, and he swayed in the wind. ...

"Qiao Yan?" He blurted out.

My hands are still steady, and I haven't spilled coke. I can see that he has become a steady man in his late thirties.

Qiao Yan hasn't changed at all. She is as thin as ever, slightly timid, laughing and her eyes are as quiet as rain. But he saw the fine lines around her eyes, such as delicate white chrysanthemums and thousands of flowers. She is the coordinate of time, recording her age and mood.

Look at the house, talk about the details one by one, and sign the contract tomorrow. At dusk outside the window, the blue of the night sky spread out one by one. He gently coughed, "Would you like to have a meal?" Old classmates chat about the past. "

Give the car to a colleague and drive it back to the company. They went by taxi, and Qiao Yan only changed into a simple black dress with suspenders, which is very ordinary. He doesn't know whether to love or hate this family: they are so close, but nothing has happened.

Chatting while eating, talking about idle people, speaking of brothers, in the photos sent back by boys, he is fat, and a few abdominal muscles have turned into a belly. Two sons, one holding the other. Smile, you really don't care. In the corner of the dining table, a candle was lit in the red-violet cup, and the flame licked charmingly in the night, which was very sultry. The fire stopped in Qiao Yan's face, and she whispered, "Where have all our youth gone?"

It was getting dark and he had to get up. Going out to take a taxi, she said, "I haven't taken the subway for a long time."

With Qiao Yan, he went down long and long steps to take the subway. She stood in the carriage, holding the railing. He stood behind her again and couldn't help looking at her carefully. Suddenly, he found a vague, dark pink mark on Qiao Yan's right shoulder, a narrow semicircle, like a shell or an angel's wing. If you put your cheek on it, you will hear the sound of Eden.

Qiao Yan didn't look back and said simply, "Birthmark."

He couldn't help but put his hand on the birthmark, and his forefinger gently outlined its lines, like touching the carmine on lotus petals, red lotus seeds and white lotus roots.

The subway stops at one stop. If life goes on, they will never get off the bus if they want to. ...

Qiao Yan suddenly chuckled, "Kang Ding, do you remember? When I went to college that year, I was crowded in front of you. "

It turns out that she knows everything.

"Qiao Yan, at that moment, I almost want to die. Just like the elf movies I watched when I was a child, my wish has come true, and there is no persistence in this world.

"What I want is not to have it; But just, you know. "

For a long time, he asked, "and you, sir?" Did you tell him you were late? "

She looked up at the window, and it was black, and she whispered, "I'm divorced." It's plain and simple, telling a story that has nothing to do with her. The ups and downs of her life's rocks are in these four words.

When he shook, the earth floated in an instant, and the stars and the moon were lost. Suddenly, his cell phone rang.

Next, it was my girlfriend's crisp voice. When she spoke, it was like frying a snail. "I saw a beautiful wedding dress today and bought it. It is a petticoat embroidered with silver flowers and a gold net. Will you come and see it later? "

She's saying, "I'm divorced."

She said, "Are you here to see the wedding dress?"

He doesn't know which sentence to answer. He doesn't know how to answer. When the subway stopped, he smiled and said, "Here I am." Inertia bow The door closed behind her.

He didn't even have time to say "goodbye, Qiaoyan."

Goodbye, or never see you again, actually it doesn't matter.

"Qiao Yan, from the beginning to the end of the train. This is also a kind of perfection, and fate has given us the greatest favor.

"It's not that we have no chance, but we are ourselves and missed it, like dancing butterflies.

"In this life, we are all missing.