Comments on correcting the diary
Your language is so attractive. You have accumulated so many words that express the mood of the characters, which is great! Your metaphors are also so vivid and appropriate, and the ending is really wonderful!
Your observation records are more comprehensive. It would be better if you integrate these daily observations into your study work, but your description of the appearance of the turtle is very exciting
Because of your careful observation and careful records, your observation diary records the changes in plants at different times. The descriptions of each change are very vivid, some describe the appearance, and some describe the color, which is awesome! The beginning of the composition:
1. The beginning of the article is simple and appropriate. It uses the description of the environment to set off the character's mood, which is very artistic.
2. The beginning is concise and to the point
3. The beginning of the article is novel and has the effect of preempting others. So that readers can have an impression of the characters as soon as they meet them.
4. The beginning of the article is engaging and attracts readers. …The combination of points and aspects makes the article vivid, concrete, and detailed.
5. The language of the article is vivid and rich, and it is highly readable.
6. The beginning is extraordinary and attracts readers
7. The beginning is touching and has real feelings.
8. The explanation at the beginning of the article is very clear, which plays the role of leading the whole article.
9. The article’s selection of materials is novel and arouses readers’ desire to read on.
Composition process:
1. With full passion, it describes...
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2. The key points are highlighted, the details are appropriate, and the content is specific.
3. The metaphor is appropriate and the words are vivid.
4. The language of the article is easy to understand, close to the reality of life, and makes people feel warm when reading it.
5. ... told us in a relaxed and pleasant tone, which is endlessly memorable.
6. The narrative is natural and vivid, the structure is compact, the connection is natural and coherent, and the center is prominent.
7. When describing the scenery, the language is concise and accurate, and the association is to touch the scenery and evoke emotions, and the scenes are naturally integrated.
8. By enriching the character’s language and actions, you can bring out the character’s ideological quality.
9. The article is both narrative and lyrical.
10. Make full use of the writing method of combining movement and static, supplemented by metaphors, personification and other techniques
11. The young author observes carefully and narrates in an orderly manner
12. The use of some exquisite words virtually adds a lot of interest to the article.
13. The article is elegant, smooth and coherent, especially the characters’ language is humorous
14. The imagination of the article is reasonable and reasonable.
15. Through vivid and vivid language The description makes the readers feel as if they are in a dream.
16. The article has clear clues, prominent themes, and closely revolves around...
17. The detailed description is quite original. Very knowledgeable.
18. Carefully and delicately describe the characters’ language, expression, movements, etc. This is a major feature of this article. 19. The description is delicate, the flavor of life is strong, and the words and sentences are accurate and expressive.
20. The language is accurate, clear and vivid, and the content is extremely rich and specific.
21. The examples are described vividly and concretely, and the words and deeds of the characters are consistent with their respective identities.
22. The article comes from life, so although the language is not very beautiful, it is real and interesting, and the writing is emotional and reasonable
23. The article writes... in detail
24. The language is lively and interesting.
25. Use a lot of spoken language in daily life to make the article more natural and friendly.