Etiquette is a collective term for manners, courtesy and rituals.

1. Manners refer to the behavioral norms that people show respect and friendship in the process of mutual interaction.

2, etiquette is people in their daily lives, especially in social occasions to show respect for each other, praise, greetings, greetings, condolences, sympathy, as well as to give the necessary assistance and care of the customary form. For example, shaking hands, bowing, embracing, kissing, saluting, smiling, etc. are all etiquette. Different peoples and countries have different etiquette, etiquette also with the development of the times face development.

3, ceremony is a formal form of etiquette, is to show courtesy and respect on certain occasions, with special procedures, standardized activities.

Etiquette is a person and even a nation, a country of cultural cultivation and moral cultivation of the external manifestations, is the basic requirements of human beings. Since ancient times, the Chinese people have been very respect for etiquette, Confucius once said: "do not learn etiquette, not to stand." That is to say, if a person wants to achieve something, he must start from learning etiquette. In modern society, although the comprehensive national strength of a country or a nation includes a wide range of contents, when evaluating a country or a nation, we usually start from the quality of citizenship and spirituality embodied in the speech, behavior and civilized habits of the people of this country or nation. Because, from the point of view of the country and the nation, etiquette is a country, a nation, social style, moral standard, degree of civilization, an important symbol of the quality of citizenship. From an individual's point of view, etiquette is a comprehensive reflection of a person's ideological awareness, moral cultivation, spiritual outlook and cultural upbringing. Through the degree of a person's use of etiquette in social life, we can detect the level of his or her education, the degree of civilization and the level of morality. It can be seen that etiquette learning is very important to the formation of civilized and polite, moral and high quality talents.

The reasons for college students' misconduct

In recent years, the phenomenon of college students' misconduct has become more and more prominent, seriously analyzing the root causes, we think that it is mainly reflected in the following aspects.

1. Loss of family education

Contemporary college students' fathers and mothers, many of them have had a period of time, and thus they pour all their love on their children, hoping that their sons will become dragons and their daughters will become phoenixes, and in the way of education, they lack of rationality and correct orientation, and they regard their children as the apple of their eye and do a hundred percent of care for them, so that their children gradually develop a consciousness of "me-centered", which is the most important thing for them. This is incompatible with the core idea of etiquette - respect, care for others, and self-discipline, thus causing some defects in their thinking and character to appear prematurely, and forming a kind of resistance to etiquette; in some one-child families, when children are treated as "little emperors", the children are often treated as "little emperors", and the children are often treated as "little emperors". In some one-child families, when the children are raised as "little emperors", the above situation is even more serious. In the content of education, there is a certain degree of one-sidedness and blindness, quick success and quick profit. Parents mainly think about how to make their children into the key elementary school, the key middle school, the key university, relax or even give up the child's family education in the etiquette of this important content.

2. Lack of school education

In China's one-sided pursuit of the college entrance rate has not yet been completely transformed under the background of primary and secondary school leaders and teachers are mainly concerned with how to improve students' test-taking level, and constantly improve the rate of school entrance. Because the students are basically spent on learning books after school, and lack of necessary and sufficient interaction and contact with other people and society, so it is difficult to expose the lack of etiquette in the world, and naturally, it is not easy to attract people's attention. When they enter the open stage of university life, the lack of etiquette left behind by the hidden dangers of education, in some of the bad social atmosphere of the induction, it may be transformed into a reality of rude behavior, and even a slip and leave a thousand years of hate.

3. Negative social impact

Since the impact of the market economy, some traditional ideas are being challenged by all kinds of "new ideas", "new things", ethics, morality, some disorders in the field. All kinds of immoral, uncivilized and indecent phenomena exist in the society, which have a negative impact on the college students who are in the initial formation of various concepts. College students' recognition of traditional social and ethical values is generally lowered, showing anti-social norms, such as the generalization of indiscipline, alcoholism and fights are common, and theft is not taken seriously, etc. The intersection of traditional moral thinking and modern lifestyle makes college students feel at a loss. What's more, young people lack the ability and experience to integrate new and old ideas, and cannot effectively use self-defense mechanisms, which will inevitably lead to their moral confusion, cognitive

disorder and imbalance of mind. At the same time, there are also some college students' etiquette behavior in some lack of etiquette in the social temporary disadvantage, or considered silly and not be understood. For example, some college students complain that they are often looked at differently when they offer to give up their seats on buses, so even if they give up their seats, they have to look at the people, or not to let them. This situation greatly affects the enthusiasm of college students to cultivate etiquette.

4. Inadequate self-cultivation

Today's society is an era of high importance to the image of the contemporary college students are very concerned about their own image, they strengthen the cultivation of a variety of capabilities, the pursuit of fashionable dress, but did not realize that it is more important to meet the requirements of the etiquette of the way to express themselves, and thus relax the etiquette of the cultivation. Some college students although recognize the importance of etiquette or knowledge of etiquette have a certain or even higher awareness, but lack of standardized training and persistent training in practice, so that it becomes a personal habit of etiquette, and therefore often appear rude words and deeds. There are even some misconceptions: that wearing fancy clothes is the pursuit of "cool", usually intentionally swearing, think only enough "cool", to speak civilized manners as "childish behavior ", for friends to be a "warrior" style and so on. This is another important reason why college students' etiquette is out of order.

Third, the function of etiquette

1. Etiquette education is the starting point for cultivating the moral quality of college students. Etiquette itself is a kind of behavioral norms with both internal moral requirements and external manifestations. Modest attitude, civilized and polite language, elegant and decent manners and other aspects of expression, is the inner cultural cultivation, moral character, spiritual temperament and state of mind. Without inner cultivation, the external form will lose its foundation. Inner good moral character, cultural cultivation only through a certain external form of expression, in order to have practical significance and role in the reality of social life, leaving a certain form of external expression of abstract moral theory and thought is empty and useless. Therefore, etiquette education is the starting point for cultivating noble moral qualities and moral sentiments of college students. Without a correct understanding of etiquette, a deep understanding and grasp of the spiritual connotation of etiquette, it is impossible to produce positive moral feelings and correct moral judgment.

2. The study of etiquette can improve the psychological quality of college students.

Etiquette has been used since ancient times as a way for gentlemen to cultivate themselves. There are three purposes of learning etiquette in ancient times: the so-called "cultivate oneself, rule the country, and pacify the world", and cultivating oneself is the first purpose. And good temperament is a good psychological manifestation of the objective and mature state of mind, strong self-adjustment and self-control ability, able to properly and accurately set their own position, and as a starting point for effective regulation of behavior, reflecting a good sense of self and proper style of dealing with the world: manifested in rationality, strong control. Rationality is an important quality for career success. Some college students in the study and life due to the lack of etiquette and youthful exuberance is often difficult to control their own emotions, some students in the fist swung at classmates are often very remorseful after the time did not control their own emotions. And in the etiquette learning can be very good to cultivate students' self-control. Confucius' "Don't look, don't listen, don't speak" is to cultivate rationality. It is all about cultivating human rationality. Good manners is in the restraint and gradually eliminate their bad habits, desires, days and years of refinement to form, naturally exudes.

3. Etiquette education can improve the ability of college students to deal with interpersonal relationships.

The original function of etiquette is to regulate the social order and coordinate the relationship between people. The important content of etiquette learning is about the interpersonal communication attitude, way, method, etiquette learning, how to introduce themselves, how to interact with others, etc., which is the college students to the society they must master the "pass", otherwise they will be "rude and difficult to walk! ". Good interpersonal relations show tolerance, open-mindedness, with people, help people happy character, in and out of the art of communication, good with all types of people get along well, can gather around themselves a large number of like-minded, help each other to promote the cause of allies. A significant feature of modern society is that the interdependence between people is getting stronger and stronger. Any person's success, are inseparable from the help of others and collaboration. To get the help of others, you must first help others, good karma, "to help others is to help themselves," which is a golden rule. The American magazine Forbes publishes a list of 400 rich people every year. These 400 rich people are all kinds of people, however, they all have a **** the same point: excellent personality qualities. American psychologist Wechsler summarized more than 40 Nobel Prize winners, found that most of their IQ in childhood for the medium or in the upper, not a child prodigy, the success of the latter mainly depends on the quality of good personality. Relevant scholars believe that in the 21st century, in the case of the basic popularization of higher education and the general improvement of the cultural quality of human beings, the selection of talents mainly depends on the quality of their personality. From this point of view, as a modern person, should have three passports, namely, academic, professional and personality qualities. Only in this way can we adapt to the current high technology, fierce competition and frequent interaction between people in social needs. Etiquette is an important way to shape high-quality, high-quality personality.

4. Etiquette learning can improve the professional quality of college students.

Professional quality is the necessary thinking, knowledge and skills of professionals, including professional ethics, professional etiquette, professional knowledge, professional skills and so on. College students in the usual professional courses often rarely learn, but it is essential in their careers. Etiquette learning can make up for this lesson for them. Modern society is an open and globally integrated society, especially after China's accession to the WTO today, our etiquette is increasingly in line with international standards, our college students must be able to stand in accordance with standard etiquette norms, sit, line, call the phone, master the office etiquette, talks etiquette, ceremonies and so on. Only in this way can adapt to the needs of society. Good etiquette can enhance the competitiveness of students. Etiquette in today's, not only is the modern professional essential knowledge, but also the necessary qualities. Therefore, many employers in the recruitment interviews are in the etiquette of the investigation. Examination of the student's appearance, speech and behavior, often also in the students inadvertently set the etiquette of the test questions, the assessment of the students' etiquette. Mr. Tseng Hsien-chi of the Golden Lilly Company in the recruitment of staff interviews, to see if they can be placed on the ground in front of the broom picked up and put away.

5, etiquette is the fundamental guarantee of the organization's image

Etiquette is an important factor affecting the success or failure of social organizations. A person's speech and behavior, clothing and hat modification, not only reflect his personal, more importantly, on behalf of his collective, is an important window of the organization's image. If you go on behalf of a unit to do reception work, there are visitors will be impressed by your courteous and polite. On the contrary, if you behave rudely, fluffy face, he may think that you are in the low quality of personnel, and then suspect the entire organization's image and strength. (Example of my department students to engage in activities to pull sponsorship of the image of the problem) For example, in the early nineties, a foreign businessman to a province in the north of China and a county governor to discuss the feasibility of investing in the construction of a pharmaceutical plant. Before signing the agreement, the foreign businessman proposed to visit the pharmaceutical workshop, just in the moment of entering the plant, the governor will be a mouthful of thick sputum. Snap. A spit in front of the factory, caused by the foreign businessman's disgust and revulsion, and then withdrew the commitment to invest. On the way back, the foreign businessman wrote a long-winded letter to the governor, the letter said: "you as the head of a county are so uncultivated, it is hard to imagine what your 'subjects' will be like? The purpose of building a medicine factory is to cure diseases and save lives, while the lack of hygiene may result in 'seeking money and killing people'. Very subtle manifestations can result in results you would not expect." We, the graduating class, should have the deepest experience of this issue.

A Japanese company, due to the expansion of its business, needed to buy a plot of land in a residential area. By doing work, all the other tenants moved out, but only one old lady expressed her unwillingness to leave her old house where she had lived for many years, and she wanted to spend the rest of her life here, and the company could do nothing about it. When the old lady decided to go to the company to make her attitude clear, she was received by a lady in the company, which changed her mind. When the lady saw her, she bowed and welcomed her. After the old lady made her intentions clear, the lady led her to the general manager's office. In Japan, it is customary to take off one's shoes when entering a room. When the old lady took off her shoes, the young lady quickly gave her her own shoes to wear, because it was very cold at that time, and then helped the old lady to go upstairs. It was the lady's noble etiquette that changed the stubborn old man. The role played by the very simple etiquette in the organization is quite uncomplicated, as small as a store, a family, a company, as big as a country, slight etiquette will damage the image of the organization. For the organization, the country has a negative impact, the organization can not be based on society, the country can not be based on the world. Now many companies in society at any cost to hire or selection of "image ambassadors", "brand spokesman", for their enterprises to establish a public image, due to these "ambassadors", "brand spokesman", "brand spokesman", "image ambassadors", "image ambassadors", "brand spokesman", "image ambassadors", "brand spokesman". As these "image ambassadors" and "brand spokespersons" are dignified, well-spoken and positive, they are quite recognized and appreciated by the public. As a result, the visibility of the enterprise is also greatly improved. Visible, etiquette on the importance of the organization's image.

Four, the cultivation of etiquette cultivation way

1, consciously accept and learn etiquette education, from the ideological level of etiquette

In interpersonal communication, etiquette is not only reflecting a person's communication skills and abilities, but also reflects a person's temperament, demeanor and upbringing.

By learning etiquette, you can improve your own moral cultivation and civilization, and better show your own elegance and good image. A courteous, well-spoken person, his life path will be a spring breeze, respected and praised by people, and he himself is a spring light, to others, to the community to bring warmth and joy. Human self-consciousness is not innate, but depends on the teacher's instruction, depends on the continuous cultivation, depends on the healthy public opinion of the society and the good environment habit, etiquette education is the prerequisite to make the etiquette cultivation full and perfect. Through etiquette education and training, we can distinguish between right and wrong, distinguish beauty and ugliness, know common sense, set up standards, which makes the formation of people's etiquette behavior has the conditions of the external cause, for further self-cultivation of the internal cause to create the conditions. Through this important condition, college students are prompted to develop and produce a strong desire for self-cultivation through hard work and continuous practice, and finally achieve the purpose of etiquette everywhere. Ancient people emphasized that "I have three times a day to save my own body", which means that we must pay attention to self-reflection to improve personal cultivation. Similarly, the study of etiquette, should always pay attention to self-examination. In this way, will help to find shortcomings to identify shortcomings, and constantly summarize the skills, self-improvement.

2, through the books, the network and other ways to widely read works of art and scientific and cultural knowledge, so that they are knowledgeable

Strengthening the cultural and artistic aspects of the cultivation, to improve the quality of etiquette is very beneficial. The improvement of cultural and artistic cultivation can greatly enrich the connotation of etiquette cultivation, enhance the taste of etiquette, and make the level of etiquette continue to improve.

Generally speaking, civilized, polite and educated people are mostly rich in scientific and cultural knowledge. This kind of people have strong logical thinking ability, consider the problem thoroughly, analyze things more thoroughly, deal with the incident more appropriate, in interpersonal communication can show a unique charm without appearing dull.

China has always been known as the "state of etiquette", ancient, modern, modern books contain a vast knowledge of etiquette, with China's addition to the WTO, China's foreign exchanges more frequently. Etiquette and customs of the world's countries vary greatly, it is necessary for college students to pay attention to collect, organize, learn and comprehend, in order to facilitate the use of practice, over time, can make their own etiquette to a new height.

3, actively participate in social practice activities, and gradually improve etiquette

Modern society, interpersonal communication is becoming more and more extensive, only from the theory of the meaning and content of etiquette, but not to use in practice is far from enough, the key to etiquette cultivation in practice. Cultivation of cultivation, both to practice and to cultivate, leave the practice, cultivation will become a source of water, no wood. In the cultivation of etiquette, we must take an active attitude, adhere to the theory and practice, will learn the knowledge of courtesy and etiquette actively applied to all aspects of social life practice, in school, family, society and other occasions, and everywhere consciously from the perspective of the big picture, the small place to start, with the etiquette of the norms to regulate their own speech and demeanor, such as do not spit, littering, not in the dormitory alcoholism, late-night Loud noise or play the stereo and in the shopping payment, bank deposits or waiting in line to comply with the public **** order, in order. This persistent, will gradually enhance the sense of civilization, cultivate polite behavior, cleansing vulgarity and indecent bad habits, become a person with etiquette and cultivation. More practice, don't be afraid to make a "foreign appearance", through a variety of interpersonal contacts to strengthen, and constantly improve the exercise. To pay attention to both to overcome self-esteem, disdain for the stubborn disease, but also to overcome the inferiority complex, timid, dare not get involved in the general disease. We have a ritual in the Chaoshan region is: when a guest to the home as a guest, to brew tea to the guests to drink, and some students will not be or not familiar with and dare not brew tea to entertain guests, which is obviously not very polite. In fact, if we try hard to try, even if we do not do a good job, the guests will be touched by our sincerity. Some ordinary students meet teachers or leaders, think the other side do not know themselves or even will not care about their own, do not dare to say hello to teachers or leaders, in fact, no teacher or leader will somehow ignore the students who say hello to them.

V. Summary

Above, we discussed what is etiquette, college students' etiquette failure, and social etiquette in our daily life, what important role, and then we talked about how to improve our etiquette, that is, to cultivate etiquette cultivation way. Maybe not too comprehensive, but I hope that more or less helpful to you, but also a wake-up call to you. Of course, what we talked about today are more theoretical things, next, we will find time to give you (freshmen) to put some for a variety of specific occasions etiquette lectures on CD-ROM, to learn specific etiquette knowledge.