I have been brought up in poverty spiritually. Even after I became an adult, I became a girl who was often praised by people through my unremitting efforts, but I know that I still live in the bottom of my heart with that self-abased, timid and sensitive child.

I've always wanted to get rid of my inferiority complex and become a confident, smart and smart little sister. This is my lifelong subject and my obsession. I've been working hard for it. I don't believe that the defects that go deep into the bone marrow will never change. I don't believe in fate.

What is confidence?

self-confidence is a kind of enthusiasm, and self-confidence is a positive attitude in self-evaluation. In a narrow sense, self-confidence is closely related to positivity. Positive without self-confidence is weak, incomplete, low-energy and inefficient. Self-confidence is self-affirmation and belief from the heart. Only when you believe in yourself will others believe in you.

Self-confidence is the conviction of one's own strength, and the conviction that one can achieve something and achieve the goal pursued. To sum up many experiences I can do is self-confidence.

What is inferiority complex?

inferiority complex, also known as inferiority complex, refers to the negative mentality that individuals experience their own shortcomings, incompetence or inferiority.

The expression of inferiority lies in the psychological state of self-evaluation, self-contempt or self-contempt and fear of losing the respect of others.

low self-evaluation, manifested in not seeing or rarely seeing your own strengths and weaknesses, always looking up to others while looking down on yourself, and often comparing others' strengths and weaknesses with your own. It is manifested as looking down on yourself, not liking yourself, not tolerating yourself, complaining, accusing and denying yourself blindly.

Adler said that inferiority is a character defect, and everyone has a sense of inferiority to varying degrees, so psychological inferiority is the basic situation that everyone has to face. It seems that what we need is to live with this defect of inferiority, rather than thinking about how to beat it and eliminate it. After gradually clarifying our own problems, we will know how to prescribe the right medicine.

First of all, we should correctly look at what we can't have and what we already have. What you can't have is the childhood that you can't go back, just like a cup of spilled milk, which can't be recovered, and the miserable childhood is the same. You can never go back and start all over again, but we must clearly tell ourselves that spilled milk has nothing to do with me, and I didn't spill it, so don't blame it. I'm an adult, and I can buy all kinds of milk I like. This stage is to accept my ordinary and imperfections and reconcile with myself. It takes a long time to accumulate. You have to be patient with yourself.

After reconciling with yourself, we need to move forward more bravely. I used to feel extremely inferior, and I have always avoided crowds, unwilling to link with others and disliked socializing. But in the process of slowly correcting myself, I observed that No one really cares about how you look at yourself. For them, whether he is willing to communicate with you or make friends with you depends on what value you can give, not on any point where you feel inferior from a personal perspective

Therefore, it is more important to build self-confidence. Don't always focus on how dissatisfied you are with yourself, because everyone will have shortcomings. In fact, in a sense, all kinds of negative emotions you have about your inferiority are also a kind of self-destruction, so don't think that you can block all the voices from the outside world. You only know that self-reconciliation is a kind of power. < P > If you want to gradually get rid of your inferiority complex and build up your self-confidence, the most critical step is to start learning to provide value to the outside world, even if it is very small value, even if it is some emotional value. In my unit, there is a girl. Because she can provide emotional value, she will always be the person who is emotionally stable and controls the rhythm, just like air, which you can't catch or touch, but it is indispensable!

I also have some caution on the road to becoming confident.

1. Don't deny yourself. Keep a success diary every day and record five things you successfully do every day.

2. Screen out outsiders, associate with people who give positive feedback and enhance your confidence, and don't associate with people who often belittle you, even if they are joking. People who don't like you or appreciate you, even if they are excellent, you don't need to change what you can, for example, figure, temperament, skin and thinking, which can be changed through continuous learning, and accept what you can't change, for example, family of origin, other people's views on you, lost youth

4. Don't take being the person expected by others as your life. Always ask yourself what you want

5. Don't listen to those who are self-satisfied with reading. Reading more is better than those women who only make up and take selfies. There is no contradiction between maintaining a beautiful appearance and inner richness. Girl, please do your best to make yourself look the most beautiful under the existing personal conditions.

6. Keep yourself when you fully know yourself. You don't have to pretend to be strong and cry. Self-confidence is not optimistic, but can be pessimistic, willful and let yourself go

7. When you feel inferior, don't hold on to your self-confidence

8. Keep exercising, release stress and protect a good sleep. Exercise is recognized as the best medicine for depression

9. In every relationship circle, Don't focus on self-reconciliation and self-encouragement, let the outside give you some positive comments and feedback, and completely block the outside voice. In fact, there is no way to really get rid of this inferiority complex. Go out and open your heart.

Be your own parents, love yourself and love you with your partner. How to love ourselves, even if there is no one, we already have ourselves, a fresh life, an independent soul and a healthy body. I am self-sufficient and perfect.