God was in the clouds/only blinked/finally frowned/fell in love with a serious pastime at first/used a bloom's time

I couldn't keep it/couldn't calculate it/left a fleeting message

Foreword

I saw such a poem in a book because I liked it. So here's a quote to express my feelings along the way:

God is in the clouds/only blinked/finally frowned/a little bit

fell in love with a serious pastime/spent a bloom's time

couldn't stay/couldn't figure out/fleeting time

Last summer, when it was hot, a group of people were labeled as post-91s. At that time, I was wearing a messy hairstyle, a pair of white old jeans, a very, very authentic middle school student, and a huge backpack, walking lazily in this huge campus. Looking at people coming and going, walking at a high speed, they hurried by with heavy book bags on their backs, which looked particularly refined and purposeful. . . . . .

they are all seniors or seniors.

and I, with my messy hair, will soon become a senior. What did I do then? I remember repeating a sentence in my heart on the road at that time: "Heaven will be a great task to Sri Lankan people, so we must first suffer from their aspirations, work hard on their bones and muscles, starve their husbands, be empty of their bodies, and mess up their actions, so be patient and increase their benefits." The idea that followed was four words-work-study program.

My elderly parents and 91-year-old grandmother, who suffered from mental illness for 41 years, have a wish since childhood that they should be positive, study hard, change their life at home and repay their loving parents for their hard work. Therefore, I have been working hard, and I tried to work part-time during the summer vacation in high school: tutor, hotel waiter, office clerk. . .

after all, people walk on the road, fish swim in the water and birds fly in the air. Everyone is walking on his own road, with crooked footprints, but belongs to his real life. Instead of admiring others and imitating others, it is better to fight for life with all my heart, devote myself to my life with full enthusiasm and love, and create my own beauty-this has always been my belief.

This winter vacation is very cold.

The first winter vacation in college, the holiday is very early. After living at home for four days, my father still worked hard in his factory and didn't go home, adapting to the busy life at school, and suddenly he was helpless in the face of this long and empty holiday. . . . . .

despite my mother's pity and slight reproach, I got on the train back to school again, thinking: I can raise the living expenses for this semester by coming to be a tutor or a hotel waiter first; On the other hand, I try my best to get familiar with the part-time market here. In the future, if I have a wide range of people, I can also create a tutor intermediary myself. Universities have to let themselves try everything as much as possible and cultivate their comprehensive ability as much as possible. After all, people should know how to invest in themselves and make progress every month, so that we will be proud of ourselves and have more confidence in the future!

However, the dream is always far from reality. The school in winter vacation is very deserted, all restaurants and shops are closed, and only the aunt on duty is left in each building. In a huge dormitory building, only the girls who are away from home in Jilin with my junior family in another hospital are left, and there is always no one. During the day, I was busy looking for a job. I walked a long way to find a printing shop and made the first leaflet to promote myself in my life. After printing 51 copies, I was so scared that I posted more than 11 copies outside the teachers' apartments and the vegetable market in the school that I dared not post them. After all, such things that damage the environment are really immoral.

Because the bedroom window faces north, it is always cold air but not sunlight, and it is cold for a long time. In addition, it is empty and has no heating facilities. Soon, I got a gastrointestinal cold, vomited and diarrhea, and stayed in bed for three days. On the fourth night, I was sent to the school hospital by my friend who worked part-time at Pizza Hut, and I finally got better after intravenous drip all night.

After that, I finally got a tutor. I taught the teacher's daughter senior three math in the teacher's apartment, prepared lessons in the morning, and taught from 2: 11 in the afternoon until 12: 11 or even 1: 11 in the evening. In the evening, the teacher wants to send me back to my dormitory. I don't want to bother him every day, but I lied that my part-time friend from Pizza Hut would pick me up. I can only pretend to be afraid to walk on the empty road, and sometimes even dare to walk through the dark corner by pretending to be on the phone. Now it's ridiculous and scary to think about it.

Aunt Su Guan simply gave me the key to the iron gate downstairs because she was going home for the Spring Festival. Opening the iron gate seemed to enter a black hole, and she walked in a dark corridor with no end. The atmosphere did not dare to come out. She only knew that the frequency of footsteps increased exponentially with her heartbeat, groped for the door, and thought that a boy from the next school hanged himself in the dormitory. She only dared to close her eyes and turn on the light first to make sure there was nothing unusual inside, then rushed in and locked the door quickly.

Being covered in a quilt, being alone outside is all lonely, sad and tired. . . All come to mind in an instant. Grievance? Afraid? Regret? It's just that tears are pouring out. I've never been so scared, tired and helpless since I started boarding in the first grade. I lie under the quilt and pour out all my worries on paper:

"The world is actually so small, very small, and it has circled many times, climbed many slopes and walked a long way, but I still can't get out of my destiny, and I still return to my humble point, very tired, very tired." Stubborn with the strength in my bones, I have shed many layers of scabs and cocoons, and it is still so hard that people can't breathe. How to cope with tomorrow and give up? No way! Insist? It's impossible! My heart is only freezing cold. . 。”

The wheel of the day continues to slide forward. My aunt in charge of lodging left me a fresh fish and some meat and eggs the day before the Lunar New Year's Eve, invited me to cook something for myself in the management room downstairs, and gave me a phone card to call home when I was homesick. Her room had an electric stove, which solved the problem of cold in the dormitory. . . There are always fruits and sweets in the teacher's house, and they also say, "You can eat where we eat. Make yourself at home. It's not easy to be alone."

The temperature is getting lower and lower, but my heart is getting warmer and warmer at this time. I sincerely thank them for their kindness and make me warm in this cold winter.

On New Year's Eve, after the reunion dinner at school, I got on the train home. The word "home" is so warm and happy for every wanderer, which makes people look forward to it. However, when the year of 2119 was about to enter that night, grandma was burned to the bottom of her body. Fortunately, my father and I found it in time. . . The warm stove at home and the lively fireworks in the air outside the New Year's Eve make my heart even colder. . . . . .

However, in the morning of the second day of junior high school, I had to helplessly leave my grandmother who was injured in bed to step on the school train, and have classes in the afternoon. My poor grandmother, who has been mentally ill for so long, took my hand. "Who will change my dressing after you leave?" My heart ached so much that I wanted to cry. I was always very strong at home. I just held back my tears and said, "Although my aunt has to take care of my uncle who has been hanging an oxygen bottle for a year, there are still my parents at home. Don't worry, I promised to make up lessons for others. I can't delay my senior year. I will come back after teaching."

At the beginning of school, my skinny grandmother still failed to survive this cold day, and quietly left in her sleep after her parents helped her take a bath. . . I got a call from my crying sister at the beginning of school, and finally I couldn't hold my breath. I fell on my desk and sobbed, and my heart ached like a knife. . . . . .

this winter vacation is cold and icy.

It's like watching yourself suddenly change from Cretaceous to Chinese Dinosaur Park, and my heart ached and tangled. But when the school started, the senior three student I taught happily told me that she had improved by more than 31 points; And the relieved eyes when I saw my parents hearing that I could earn my own living expenses to support myself; Think of the warmth that my aunt, teacher and partner gave me when I was in school; There is also a brand-new self that is more independent, stronger, more mature and sensible; I can't help thinking of a poem:

Let Bud slowly open itself/Let a bloom go to the end/Let a drop of dew fall freely along the flower stem/Go home singing/Let your outstretched hand close/Touch a petal/Gently/Happiness is in an instant/Straight to the bottom of my heart. . . .

after all, isn't the pain of a broken glass cone a beautiful growth?

I have a website of my own.

The raw apples can be matured in long-distance transportation, so I can pack up and start as early as possible. Wine doesn't have to wait until it boils, so I can freshly bake it in advance; I don't have to wait until the spring to bloom, so I can set sail as soon as possible while I am young. After all, when the time is right and everything is ready, you may miss the opportunity to stand on the commanding heights. There is no mountain higher than people, and there is no road longer than feet. Success is a choice, and then persistence, to achieve a better self.

Schmidt, president of p>Google, once said that if you have an idea and don't try, it is the biggest loss. And a senior once told me this with his personal experience. A person's life will always be bound by a long rope such as many rules or spiritual imprisonment, and the process of continuous progress is also the process of self-unwinding. If you struggle with fixed rules, you may succeed, but if you want to create a miracle, you must learn to break through self-imprisonment. Some established rules may be long ropes that bind people's growth, so we should untie them without hesitation.

I happened to meet a classmate in my class who was making a home network. At first, I always had such a plan, so I was glad to join in. In a fashionable phrase, it is called "taking a share", because I have to invest a sum of money at a time, and I have been thinking about it for several days. I think that I am still working as a tutor anyway, and I have a certain income, and my family tutor has a certain amount of savings and some salesmen's commission, so I made up my mind to try. I'm mainly responsible for marketing issues, and I'm still in the initial promotion stage, not on the right track, and I'm working hard.

Bowman, the coach of Phelps, who was born for swimming, said, "Successful people have a habit of doing things that unsuccessful people don't want to do." Although many friends think I have too many things to do, I am a class league secretary, an office clerk, an association organization department, and sometimes I have to host some pen friends, and I have to take time to tutor and be a salesman. . . Everyone advised me that there is no need to do this. Some things can't bring me many benefits and improvements.

I really made myself very tired when I was a freshman, but the reason is actually that I am not good at arranging time, so I didn't get much results. However, even if a salesman listens to the endless training of managers above, he can also understand different management methods of different companies from a different perspective, and hotel waiters are similar. Of course, my college life is also heavy, full of harvest and full of happiness.

some moods may not be mellow, but they may also be faded if they are precipitated at a certain time in the years. Some opportunities, if stagnant in time, are likely to be missed, and then, there is no turning back or turning around. Some things, maybe we just chose not to do at that time, only to understand later, so we will lose a lot, for example, the opportunity of experience.

Although my knowledge has not been fully reserved, I will not feel guilty. I believe that passion is a knife, even if it has not been sharpened, it is itself sharp. Although I have not gained experience, I will not feel inferior. Opportunity is also a knife. Even if it is narrow and secretive, it is full of enthusiasm. Although I don't have a wise and mature mind, I won't be discouraged. I will learn to continue my' work-study program' and' life' with a cool mind and a warm heart, and of course, carry happiness to the end.

That's why I have a website of my own. . . .

epilogue

The triviality of daily life and the hardships of work-study always make us too busy to look around. The curiosity of discovering the world in childhood and the melancholy and longing of facing the spring flowers and the autumn moon in youth have gradually faded with the long years. Perhaps all we think about is rushing ahead, seeing distant dreams or goals at the top of the mountain, and we forget to appreciate the scenery along the way. Therefore, we will feel depressed, feel that our ideals are getting farther and farther away from ourselves, and sigh that life is very difficult. In fact, when we take off the telescope imposed on ourselves, we find that every corner that we ignore is sunny with flowers and birds.

It is true that life is a river that never looks back. How many beautiful moments and ordinary moments will slip silently from your fingertips without leaving a trace of memory. Although there are festivals every year, after all, they are different every year.

On the way to work and study, it is a lie to turn around and hide your tears. However, I can proudly say that' laughter' has been my symbol all the way, and it will still be in the future! People who know how to smile sincerely are happy people, but in the eyes of happy people, there is never anything boring. Shen Rubing, the host of CCTV, once said: "Smile is the most powerful weapon. Smiling contains respect, understanding and goodwill, and is the key to the soul. " A smiling person is also a strongman who can never be defeated.

Work-study program is not simple, but as long as we learn to appreciate the beauty around us, just like paying attention to every drop of rain around us, maybe it is pregnant with the beauty of the rainbow!

this, scattered all over the floor, is the "message" that I "linger" in the "fleeting time". . . . . .

Leave a message in a fleeting time.