blind date:
First, friends and relatives tell us that there is someone suitable for both parties, and then parents or others will make some unannounced visits to each other. If there is no opinion, they will agree to associate with each other. Some people get along with each other first, and then slowly introduce them to their parents. This is a custom that most Baoying people follow. Although there are more free love now, they basically have to show it to their parents. If you are in free love, you will need to find a matchmaker to show that the Ming media is getting married.
Engagement:
Both lovers are going to get married, so let your parents know. For fear that their children are not in a hurry (in fact, most parents are in a hurry), parents formally hold a ceremony before marriage, that is, engagement. The purpose of engagement is to formally inform the closest relatives and friends, let them know that the girl has a husband's family, and the young man also has a fiancee. The main relatives of both sides get to know each other and invite them to dinner by the way (this meal can also be done at home, and some men express their sincerity and go directly to the restaurant to make it more lively). In the engagement ceremony, the man usually goes to the woman's house with betrothal gifts (such as clothes and rings bought by the man for the girl) and sets off some firecrackers. This ceremony does not require relatives and friends to give money, but the elders will give gifts to the two children. Now some people cancel the engagement ceremony in order to save trouble.
Festival-chasing:
On the penultimate festival before marriage, usually on the Dragon Boat Festival, Mid-Autumn Festival, Spring Festival and other days, the man will send two ducks (pawns) at the farewell ceremony, which means that I will put my fiancee at my mother-in-law's house first and wait for me to get married. In the penultimate festival before marriage, two geese (nests) were sent instead, indicating that the fiancee was going to nest in her home ("nest" is a dialect, which means "marriage"). Because there are no ducks or geese when giving gifts at ordinary times, the woman knows that the man is going to marry the girl, and the girl is going to get married, which is called Zhuijie.
nowadays, the two ceremonies of engagement and memorial service are sometimes reversed.
Warm House:
Warm House Day (also called "make-up" locally) refers to the day before marriage. After the date of marriage is decided, both men and women should make some preparations before marriage: some people choose a good day in advance to send the girl's dowry to the man's house, while others will send it in a warm room. On Warm House Day, both men and women have to host a banquet at home to entertain their relatives and friends. The banquet is usually arranged in the evening, and the main relatives and friends are usually present. Generally, the uncle and aunt sit as the chairman (on the table), so the wine eaten on this day is called warm house wine. The bride and groom also have things to arrange. Before the bride gets married, she has to bathe and change clothes on the greenhouse day, usually accompanied by a maid of honor (a girl chosen by her aunt in the local area, or a girl who is close to the bride among relatives and friends) to rest; Dress up the next day and wait for the arrival of the groom. On the groom's greenhouse day, besides greeting guests, he should also bathe and change clothes. Before going to bed, the man's family arranges a boy (usually a close relative boy or the best man) to sleep with him. The next day, the boy who sleeps with him can get money for pressing the bed on the groom's bed. There are usually some dates, peanuts, sweets and cakes under the couple's bed, which means that the couple are prosperous and have children and grandchildren, and have children early.
Zhengri:
Zhengri is the wedding day, which is the most crucial day for the couple and the day with the most etiquette.
In the morning, the groom takes the car to pick up the bride to make up, but most of them are arranged by the woman's family, and they send someone to accompany the bride or invite makeup artists to make up at home. At this time, the bride puts on makeup, and the groom arranges to tie the wedding car and hold flowers. After putting on makeup, the bride will go home by car, or arrange an auxiliary car to send the bride, and the float will go home with the groom at this time. When the float returned to the groom's house, the groom's parents burned incense and thanked the bodhisattva, and arranged for the wedding team to have morning tea. The wedding team is generally composed of the groom, the best man and the matchmaker, with or without drivers and photographers. After a simple morning tea, set off with wedding gifts, firecrackers and farewell, and set off to marry the bride.
Go to the bride's house and send a whip to tell her, saying: Marry the whip. The bride's family had already sent someone to wait, and they also responded with a whip, saying, a whip to welcome the bride. To welcome the arrival of the wedding team, when I arrived at the bride's house, the groom went straight to the bride to offer flowers to show that I had come to marry you. At this time, some people will not let the door open and ask for a red envelope, saying: open the door and seal it. Then the groom dispersed the happy smoke. The host arranged for the guests to sit down and eat three teas (one tea, brown sugar and red dates, two teas, sweets and cakes, and three teas of glutinous rice balls).
after a short break, the bride will begin to get married. (There are arrangements, children's toilets, bronze stove curtains, boxes and quilts, toiletries, and dowry items ...), but now these brides are generally sent to the man's house together with the dowry in advance. Generally, on the day of the wedding, a girl is mainly sent as a dowry, and the delivery of boxes is exquisite. The bridegroom is required to pay money to the person who locks the box (the bride's brother or brother) (how much is discussed in advance, generally) There are also exquisite things in the box, and red envelopes are usually placed around it, saying: box money. If the man carries a red envelope to press the box, the woman must match the same red envelope equal to or greater than the red envelope to press the box together. At this time, a matchmaker or grandma Xi will light a red paper twist (a paper stick twisted with red paper and stained with oil), or the woman's house will be covered with a red paper sieve, and a ceremony will be held around the box, saying, Take a picture. Second, the bride's father or brother or younger brother will accompany the bride to cook a rich meal and light candles. Generally, there are only two dishes, fish and tofu. Yue: If you are full, you will get married in peace. The matchmaker or grandma Xi put a little of everything to feed the bride. At this time, the bride and her mother will cry. Say: Cry and marry.
Then the bride starts to get married. At this time, her feet don't touch the ground. The bride puts the bride's shoes in her father's or brother's shoes, and the father or brother helps her get on the groom's float (or the brother carries the groom's float on her back). When she leaves home or gets on the float, the bride leaves her father's or brother's shoes (before that, the bride has to put a red envelope in her shoes, which is for the father or brother who helped her), and the family also arranges someone to send her to marry. At the same time, remember to bring the dowry of the woman's family, which is usually half of the gift brought by the groom. Finally, whip farewell.
The wedding team will set off firecrackers or toss coins when they cross the bridge on their way home. When they got home, the groom's family began to set off firecrackers to welcome the new couple. The bride won't get off the bus for the time being, saying, hold your temper. At this time, some people put reed firewood according to the distance, and spread it from the car to the door of the house. At the gate or the stairs, they lit the red reed firewood handle, pine branches and sesame stalks in the ingot basin. When finished, pick up the bride and get off the float. The groom is in front, and the bride is holding or carrying the bride in the back. Some people enter the house along the road paved with Lu Chai, saying: There is money at your feet; Then cross the brazier, saying: it is getting higher and higher; Enter the bridal chamber.
After entering the bridal chamber, the matchmaker closes the door, arranges for the bride and groom to have tea and a rich meal, and then hangs up the curtain. Generally, it is the matchmaker (the wedding ceremony) who calls a few words of good wishes, and also arranges unmarried or young men to pound the window, and also applauds them. Those who pound the window can get wedding candy or cigarettes and red envelopes. Some arrange to smash the window after the bridal chamber is over. Commonly used words to pound the window: pound and poke, raise a son to go to college; A Dao Yi Tuo, raise a son to be an official; A pound, a pull, a full stomach to raise eighteen; A pound, a pile, raise a son croak.
Then, arrange the couple and the wedding procession to eat three tea. After tea, the meeting ceremony means that the bride meets the main relatives of the groom's family (grandfather, grandmother, father, mother, uncle, aunt, uncle, aunt, brother, sister, uncle, aunt, etc.), which is called the meeting ceremony. There are also worship ceremonies.
after the ceremony, arrange for the new couple to return to their parents' home, and some women's families arrange special people to take care of them, usually older brothers or younger brothers. Yue: bringing back the door is also a return door. Some came back the next day. When you go back to the door, you should also bring back a gift. On the way back to the door, you will meet the relatives of the woman who come to the man's house to make a move. Generally, the man's house sends someone to pick them up, saying, bring a move. At this time, the cars or motorcades of both sides can drive away directly, and some bridegrooms can't talk when they get off to spread cigarettes, and then their respective motorcades drive away, and the couple go to the woman's house and invite guests to the man's house.
At noon, the newlyweds eat at the woman's house, and before or after eating three tea again, the newlyweds should take the initiative to meet the relatives and elders of the woman's house and greet them. At this time, the relatives and elders will also give the newlyweds a greeting; Inviting guests to eat at the man's house is usually composed of the main relatives of the woman's house, so that the main relatives of both sides can get to know each other.
In the afternoon, after the two sides have finished eating, the couple will go back to the man's house and invite guests back to the woman's house. Moreover, the motorcades of both sides will have a rest on the way. When they get home, the couple will prepare a banquet in the evening, at which they will propose a toast to everyone.
after drinking, the noisy room begins. When the bridal chamber is in trouble, the officiant will shout a few words of good words, such as: open the curtain and look at the bride. One person will eat happy candy and the other will eat happy eggs. After the noisy room is over, set off fireworks and firecrackers and smash windows. If they are not smashed in the morning, the bride and groom will wash and close the door to rest.
Going back to the door
Going back to the door is a continuation of the wedding day. Even if you go back to the door on the same day, the couple usually have to go back to the door the next day, which is a tradition. Now that young people are open to the outside world, some families have done things in one day to save money and not be tiring. Some people put their banquets together in restaurants for the sake of excitement. Some newcomers use photo-following, camera shooting, motorcade and wedding etiquette to leave the best memories for their lives.
The above is the general custom that we Baoying people follow now. I hope you like it!