For thousands of years, with the change of history, the wedding phenomenon has not only gradually formed a certain formula, but also inherited a unique national and regional cultural phenomenon. Although these marriage customs are permeated with many feudal and stale colors, they also reflect the tradition and serious marriage fashion of the Chinese nation. The world is full of miracles; Marriage customs of various nationalities and regions are varied. Now, I only briefly describe the marriage customs that are still circulating in Linli area.

Let's talk about marriage first. Marriage is the first important event in life. As the saying goes, "men should marry when they are older, and women should marry when they are older." In the old society, men were eighteen and women were almost twenty-eight. If they couldn't get married, it would be a sin for parents to be sorry for their ancestors and children. Therefore, men, whether they are famous for studying or doing business in agriculture, always get married at this time and complete lifelong events to save their parents' worries. When a woman is sixteen or seventeen, she should learn to dress and wash clothes, cook tea and rice, mend clothes and make shoes. Girls from rich families no longer appear in public, and their mothers will teach them manners to treat people, and begin to practice picking flowers and embroidering in the boudoir. This is the so-called "boudoir waiting for words".

Second, hire a matchmaker. Please matchmaker, commonly known as matchmaker. In the old society, arranged marriage was practiced. Everything was arranged by parents, and some even called belly marriage. Therefore, for thousands of years, in the love between men and women, there has been a song of parting between life and death, as well as a tragic story of refusing to marry. After liberation, men and women broke free from the shackles of arranged marriages for thousands of years. Freedom of love and marital autonomy not only became a common practice, but also were protected by law. However, in some rural areas, the custom of inviting people on blind dates is still prevalent. Although the matchmaker is the product of arranged marriage, it has played a certain role in bridging the gap between men and women. For some marriages that have almost broken down, the matchmaker can also bridge the gap and get back together. The role of matchmaker is not something that ordinary women can do well. If you don't do it well, it may be that "the mouse gets angry at both ends of the bellows." Generally, the matchmaker is a woman, and the basic conditions are that she is married, has given birth to children, is eloquent and resourceful. "There are a hundred women in a family." Women generally don't take the initiative to invite people to be matchmakers. The man can openly ask someone to be a matchmaker. These matchmakers are generally represented by relatives and friends. People say that matchmaking is also doing good deeds and can prolong life.

Third, look at others. Seeing others is also called blind date. Seeing others can also be said to be the first time for men and women to walk and communicate. In the old society, there was no custom of meeting people. Completely know each other directly or indirectly by the matchmaker or the close relatives of both men and women. It was not until the late Qing Dynasty that blind date became fashionable. Blind date is also decided by both men and women. Usually the man goes to the woman to see others first. When the man comes, he can bring some gifts, such as sugar and fruit. Gifts are generally not very expensive. When the man arrives at the woman, he must first look at the woman's rural house, and then look at the woman's words and deeds, whether there are physical defects. If the man is satisfied, eat at the woman's house. If he is not satisfied, the man will politely refuse the meal. The woman also knows that nine times out of ten the marriage is unsuccessful, so she won't stay. Once the woman gets married in the man's house, it is convenient for the man to give something to her, which is also called "giving away". Send money to send things, the number is not fixed. If the woman reneges on her word, she should return all the gifts given to her by the man, otherwise she will be reviled; If the man says that he wants to break off his marriage, the gift will be "the meat steamed stuffed bun hits the dog, and there is no return". Naturally, the man is not reluctant. Look, there is another custom called "putting tea". This is an important custom.

Fourth, send happiness. Happiness is also called engagement. This is an indispensable custom for both men and women before marriage, and it is also a very grand custom. The time of happiness is decided by both men and women. On this day, three friends and four relatives were invited to show the world that their children's lives are fixed. The ceremony of sending happiness is heavier. There are two grades popular in rural areas: one is the ritual burden, also called the basket burden. Men usually buy clothes, shoes and socks, and cakes and sweets are all in the basket; There are usually "two hooks" hanging outside the basket, such as fish and chicken, which weigh more than two or three kilograms. Some have four hooks, which are nothing more than chickens and fish. The second is to carry a box, which is a wooden utensil for holding gifts. A wooden shelf half a foot high and wide, with two ears with holes at both ends and bamboo poles in the middle. Four rectangular wooden cells can be placed on the wooden frame in turn, and the items in each cell are different. Generally, there are two compartments for clothes and two for food. There must be four hooks outside the box. It's also chicken, duck, fish and so on.

Tea ceremony. In addition to baskets and suitcases, they will also be given to the closest relatives of the woman when she is happy, such as gifts from her uncle, aunt and step. These gifts are usually two kilograms of meat, a pair of shoes and a bag of sugar. Anyone who accepts these gifts should buy her a certain amount of dowry (also called dowry) when she gets married. So there is a saying: this tea is not fragrant, and you will "sweat" if you marry him in the future.

Fifth, report the heat. According to the economic conditions of the man and the opinions of the woman, the custom of reporting heat can be done or not. Give the woman some clothes to wear in hot weather when reporting the heat. Today, this custom has been abolished.

Sixth, send it to Japan. The date of delivery is commonly known as "eight characters", which is also the eight characters of giving birth to Geng. This is a custom that men must abide by. Its purpose is to decide the date of marriage. In advance, both men and women ask fortune tellers to calculate the date of birth of both men and women, which is also called "eight characters" The so-called eight characters are: a certain year, a certain month, a certain day and a certain time. If the eight characters match, you can get married one day; If the eight characters match, you can't get married You can also ask superstitious professionals to treat diseases and ward off evil spirits, and you can get married after treatment. In fact, superstitious professionals get money from it. If the date of birth is the same, the date will be sent by both men and women. In other words, write the birthdays of both men and women on a piece of red paper. Men write half and women write half, and then the man prepares the bonus bride price. The bride price is nothing more than clothes and food for the woman, and the wedding date chosen by the man is also written on red paper, which is also called sending the day. After sending the ribbons to the women's museum, there is also a program called "unpacking". A special person is responsible for unpacking, and the unpacking person takes out red paper with birthday and wedding date and gives it to the woman's parents. If the woman's parents agree to get married on the date chosen by the man, they will accept red paper. If the woman disagrees with the date chosen by the man for other reasons, they will not accept the red paper and still put it back in the gift bag to be taken back by the man. This shows that the woman wants to postpone the wedding. After that, if there are no other changes, there is no need to send the date. Only the man verbally informed the woman that the woman agreed to set a wedding date.

Makeup ceremony. The so-called makeup discount refers to the gift money that the man buys the dowry for the woman. In the old society, the dowry was entirely arranged by the woman. The things that got married later were organized by both men and women. If the woman is willing to handle all of them, then the man should send her a certain amount of cash, which is the gift of folding makeup.

Seven, gifts. After both men and women set the wedding date, on the first day of the structure, the man will give the woman everything she needs when she gets married, such as clothes, shoes and socks, ginger tea (also called melon slices) and so on. In different ways, some use boxes, some use baskets, some use pigs and sheep, and some use half pigs and half sheep. On the day of the ceremony, the woman is the most lively, and she will hold a banquet (called full wine) to entertain the three relatives, four relatives, uncles and aunts who come to congratulate. Relatives and friends who come to the wedding banquet should give a certain amount of "dowry" (items), mostly bedding, boxes and cabinets, depending on their own economic situation and closeness. Guests who come on this day, if they are close relatives (also called bosom friends), usually spend the night at the woman's house, and the woman helps the woman's house; Men drink and play cards for fun.

Eight, pull a face. Pulling a face is also called opening a face. Unmarried women become an important symbol of married women (adults). When opening a face, please ask a woman with a full house of children and grandchildren to use long cotton thread. First, pinch the cotton thread by hand, then combine the two cotton threads into one strand, with one end biting in the mouth and the other end wrapped around the thumb and forefinger. Pull the cotton thread with the opening of two fingers and twist out a thin layer of hair on the bride's face. The practice of opening a face is basically not used now. Instead, the bride goes to the beauty salon for beauty salon.

Nine, tell the ancestors. On the first night of the wedding, the groom's family will specially set up a sumptuous banquet. There must be at least twelve bowls of food at this banquet. In the evening, the whole family should dress neatly, wash their hands and faces, light incense wax in front of the ancestral tablet, then set up a banquet, put on bowls and chopsticks, and invite the deceased ancestors to eat wine. It is intended to tell your ancestors that their children have finished their marriage and ask their ancestors to bless them with a happy marriage and developed children.

Ten, get married. On the day of the ceremony, the man should not only prepare all the things, but also set the specific time for the woman to give a kiss the next day. Marriage time (that is, the woman is on the road) generally does not exceed noon (that is, it does not exceed 12 noon). In this way, it can be said that "everything is ready, except the east wind." One or two days before the wedding, beloved relatives and friends came to congratulate them and said: drinking a wedding banquet is also called eating melon tea. Men naturally kill pigs and sheep, and arrange banquets according to the number of relatives and friends. There are eight to twelve bowls of dishes at the party. Therefore, the man should ask for help. Except for the chefs who cook, these helpers are all unpaid, chopping wood and carrying water, burning fire and cutting vegetables, and serving tea and water. Everything is arranged by a "knowledgeable person". The hostess is appointed by the host and is responsible for all the affairs of receiving guests and the layout of the kitchen and teahouse. Nowadays, intellectuals have supreme power.

Eleven, send a kiss. The bride got up and went to her husband's house. When the bride gets up in the morning, she has to dress up again. Simply eat something and chat with friends and family. The couple put on red and blue, and put a white square diagonal towel in their cuffs to cover their mouths or wipe their tears. The person who sent the bride, also called Shang Qin, was appointed by the woman. Generally, in addition to the bride's brothers and sisters, friends can also be invited to see her off. The first relative should be a well-dressed and decent person, so as to show the unity of this family and have an extraordinary family style, so as to boost the prestige of the married daughter and make the man dare not look down on her family. Relatives are the most distinguished guests, so the groom's family should be careful to wait on them. You can't offend them. The man comes to pick up the bride (formerly known as picking up the bride), and the team is usually very large. In addition to the matchmaker and groom, there are a group of married men and women. Generally, they are young men and women about the same age as the groom, and naturally they are mostly relatives and friends of the groom. In addition, there are a group of lux who help the groom carry the dowry.

XII. Dowry. Parent-child refers to what the woman's parents and three relatives and four relatives married her. How many things he marries, good or bad, depends on the financial situation of the woman's family. Excluding bedding and porcelain, it is roughly divided into: one box and one cabinet. A box and a cabinet is the simplest dowry, that is, a box; A cabinet; Two boxes and two cabinets. That is, two boxes and two cabinets; Three boxes and three cabinets are a very grand dowry, which can only be bought by a large family.

Thirteen, drummer. There are no professional trumpeters in this country. Some are organized by a few people who know how to play, and some are organized by a village person who can play with several apprentices. Trumpeters are usually nine people.

Fourteen, crying marriage. In the past, women cried when they got married. Nearly half a month after the divorce, the girl began to cry to get married, which made her parents sad all day. If she doesn't cry or marry, she will think that she has forgotten her parents' kindness, which is unfilial and will be reviled. There are two kinds of crying marriage: one is real crying and the other is fake crying.

XIV. Vibrating sedan chair. The couple got into the sedan chair, the groom rode a horse, and there was no sedan chair and no horse. The groom walked in front of the sedan chair and staggered all the way, surrounded by onlookers. After walking three or five miles, the bearers signaled and began to tremble. The bride is most afraid of rocking the sedan chair. As soon as the sedan chair bearers sang the sedan chair song, their steps began to waver. It's really three steps.

Fifteen, pay homage to the church. Visiting the church, also known as the flower worship hall, is to announce to the world and ancestors that so-and-so son and miss so-and-so are officially married. Visiting the church is a very sacred thing. It is a great honor for parents to comfort their children's lifelong events. Here all the guests gather in front of the hall, big red candles are lit in front of the ancestral tablets, and Gao Tang (parents) sit in front of the hall. Two new people stood around, with their paws under their feet. The master of ceremonies began to shout, "One worships heaven and earth, and the other worships the high hall ...". After the ceremony, gongs and drums rang, and both husband and wife entered the bridal chamber.

Sixteen, tea. Tea toast: The bride and groom offer tea to the guests. After the ceremony, the bride and groom hold tea sets in their hands and put small colored cups in them. Put a few candies of winter melon in each cup, and then brew with boiling water, which is called melon slice tea. Tea should be served to the elders first, then to the peers, and then to the younger generation, and the order should not be disrupted. There is a guide when offering tea, because some relatives, friends and brides don't know each other and must be introduced. People who drink tea should pay for it themselves, put the tea money into the cup, and the bride takes back the cup containing the tea money, which is kept by the bride and becomes the bride's "private money".

Seventeen, eat dinner. After the bride and groom toast tea, they don't eat a big meal. Instead, the chef in the kitchen cooked a table with four dishes and one soup, and the bride and groom were toasted in the bridal chamber. After that, the groom will give red envelopes to the chefs in the kitchen.

Eighteen, noisy room. On the wedding night, all the relatives left, and the rest were the guests of the man. When the lights came on, some friends of the groom's generation began to have sex.

Nineteen. Back to the door. After a man and a woman get married for three days, both sides will go back to their parents' homes, which is called returning home. Take a walk around your mother's house and come back immediately after dinner. Don't spend the night outside. You have to wait a month (also called a full house) before you can spend the night outside or go out for a long trip.