(1) occasions for shaking hands.
When welcoming guests;
When you are introduced to others;
When we meet again after a long separation;
When you suddenly meet an acquaintance in a social situation;
When visiting and leaving;
When seeing the guests off;
When others congratulate themselves and give gifts;
Ask others;
When others help themselves, etc.
(b) Rules for the handshake ceremony
There is a sequence of handshakes. The order of shaking hands is mainly to respect each other's needs. The order is mainly determined by the social status, identity, gender and various conditions of the handshake.
1. The order of shaking hands is: the superior comes first, the elder comes first, the lady comes first, and the host comes first; And subordinates, juniors, men and guests should say hello first, and then reach out and shake hands with him. Don't stretch out your hand in front of your superiors. If two people are similar in status, age and position, it is polite to reach out first.
2. If a man and a woman meet for the first time, the woman may not shake hands with the man and exchange nods; If receiving guests, both men and women, the hostess should extend her hand to welcome them, and the host can also extend her hand to welcome the female guests first.
If one person shakes hands with more than one person, it should be the superior first, the subordinate later, the elder first, the younger generation first, the host first, the guest first, the lady first, and the man later.
4. If one party ignores the handshake sequence, extend your hand first, and the other party should shake it back immediately to avoid embarrassment.
(3) The correct posture of shaking hands.
The standard way of shaking hands is: when shaking hands, the two people are about one step apart, with their upper bodies slightly forward, holding out their right hands, putting their four fingers together and opening their thumbs, and shaking their palms vertically to the ground, usually for two or three seconds. When shaking hands, look at each other, smile or just say hello, say hello in words.
(D) Body language of the handshake ceremony
There are many different ways to shake hands. Understanding some typical handshakes not only helps us to understand each other's personality, emotional state and basic attitude towards others through handshakes; It also helps us to consciously use various specific styles in interpersonal communication according to different occasions and different objects.
1, shake hands politely. Also known as "begging" handshake, submissive handshake. That is, palm up or left hand up gestures to shake hands with each other. People who shake hands in this way are often weak and passive, and may be more democratic, modest and approachable, and have more respect, admiration and even a little awe for each other. Such people tend to change their views easily, are not stubborn, and are willing to be dominated by each other.
2. Leading the handshake. Also known as "controlled" handshake, palm down or left hand down to hold the other person's hand. People who shake hands in this way want to express their sense of superiority, initiative, arrogance or dominance. Generally speaking, such people speak neatly, act decisively and have high self-confidence. Once a decision is made, it is difficult to change his point of view and his style is not democratic. When the social status gap between the two sides is large, the higher social status party is easy to shake hands with the other party in this way.
3. the handshake is weak. Also known as the "dead fish" handshake, a weak hand is stretched out when shaking hands, giving people a feeling of holding a dead fish. This kind of person is characterized by cowardice, indifference and negative arrogance.
4. "Glove" handshake. Holding each other's right hand with both hands can not only show more respect and goodwill to each other, but also show more gratitude and desire to others. But this kind of handshake is best not to be used on people who meet for the first time, so as not to cause unnecessary misunderstanding.
5. Grab your fingertips and shake hands. When shaking hands, I didn't touch the jaw of my hand, just holding several fingers or fingertips of the other person intentionally or unintentionally. When women shake hands with men, they often take this way to show reserve and stability. If people of the same sex shake hands like this, it seems a bit cold and unfamiliar.
6. Charity handshake. That is, when shaking hands, only four fingers are extended to shake hands with people, which shows that this person lacks cultivation, arrogance and is not approachable. (except for the handshake between ladies and gentlemen in medieval Europe)
In addition, when the other person holds your hand for a long time and shakes it at the same time, it shows that his feelings for you are sincere and warm. The other person holds your hand and doesn't even want to bend his fingers. He is just a routine perfunctory, indicating that the other party's feelings for you are cold. Before you finished, the other person held out his hand, indicating that you are not interested in him. You should end the conversation as soon as possible.
(5) Matters needing attention when shaking hands
Be careful when shaking hands. Don't look around and greet others when shaking hands.
Don't shake hands across the threshold when you meet and leave.
A handshake is always a standing handshake. It is impolite to shake hands while sitting, except for the elderly, the infirm or the disabled.
You can't put your left hand in your pocket when holding hands.
Men should not wear hats and gloves to shake hands with others, and those in uniform should not take off their hats, but raise their hands before shaking hands. Ladies can wear decorative hats and gloves to shake hands.
Don't hold hands with others with your left hand unless your right hand is disabled. If your right hand is dirty, hold out your palm to signal to the other party and apologize.
Shake hands evenly, which is generally symbolic to women, but the grip should be calm, enthusiastic and sincere.
When shaking hands, don't grab, don't cross, wait for others to shake hands before reaching out and shaking hands. Cross-hugging is a rude behavior under normal circumstances. Some countries regard the hand as an ominous symbol, and mark it as a "ten" to indicate the cross, thinking that this will definitely bring misfortune. Jugong ceremony is a kind of greeting etiquette commonly used by people to show respect for others.
(1) On the occasion of the Gong Ju ceremony,
Gong Ju ceremony can be used not only for solemn or festive ceremonies, but also for general social occasions. It is suitable for both society and family. Pay tribute to superiors, students pay tribute to teachers, and younger generations pay tribute to their elders at lower levels; Speech on the stage, curtain call by actors, etc. In addition, major commercial buildings and hotels also use bow ceremonies to express their welcome and respect for their guests.
(B) Jugong ceremony way
Bow: Suitable for social occasions, speeches, curtain calls, etc. When saluting, the upper body leans forward about 15-20 degrees, and then returns to its original state, only once.
Three Bows: Also known as the most saluting, when saluting, the upper body bends forward about 90 degrees, and then returns to its original state, and so on for three consecutive times.
(C) JuGongLi posture is correct
The saluter and the recipient should pay attention to each other and should not squint and look around; Don't wear a hat when saluting. If you need to take off your hat, use your hand opposite to the side of the salute, that is, take off your hat with your right hand when saluting the person on the left and with your left hand when saluting the person on the right. The saluter is about two meters away from the recipient; When saluting, the head, shoulders and upper body lean forward about 20 to 90 degrees with the waist as the axis, and the specific degree of leaning forward depends on the respect of the saluter to the recipient; When the upper body leans forward, your hands should naturally droop to your sides, or you can smile, droop your eyes and put your hands in front of your body. You can also attach greetings to your mouth, such as "hello" and "good morning". Stand at attention again after the ceremony.
Usually, when the recipient returns the gift, he should bow roughly the same as the upper body of the saluter. However, when a superior or elder returns a gift, he can bow or extend his right hand at the same time without bowing back.
(4) Problems that should be paid attention to when bowing
Under normal circumstances, it is impolite to take off your hat and bow.
Bow your head when you bow to show your humility. You can't bow and look at each other at the same time, which is neither elegant nor polite.
When JuGongLi gets up, look at each other politely. If you look away, even if you bow, you won't feel sincere.
Don't eat or smoke when you bow.
When you take the stage to receive the prize, you should first bow to the winner to show your gratitude. Receive the award again. Then he turned and bowed to all the participants to show his respect. (1) Applicable occasions
Boxing is also called bowing. The fist-shaking ceremony created by China people is basically the same as the original intention of shaking hands by westerners. The difference is that boxing has the meaning of "keeping a distance" from each other, so this form of etiquette has a closed connotation in the social sense. Boxing ceremony is often used in martial arts, between elders and some occasions with strong national style. Sometimes it is also used in some informal occasions or occasions with harmonious atmosphere, such as Spring Festival group worship, banquets, parties and so on. It is mainly suitable for individuals to carry out this etiquette when facing the group, that is to say, holding their own hands, rather than holding others' hands.
(2) Correct posture
The basic action of boxing ceremony is to make a fist with the right hand half-clenched, then wrap the right fist with the palm of the left hand, bend your arms to your chest, look at each other, smile and shake a few times. Introduction is to communicate with each other and establish the relationship between the two sides. Introduction is the basic way to get to know each other in social situations. Through introduction, the distance between people can be shortened, so as to have a better conversation, more exchanges and a deeper understanding. There are several types of introductions commonly used in daily life and work, namely, self-introduction, introduction for others and collective introduction.
(1) Introduce yourself
Problems to pay attention to in self-introduction: in principle, we should pay attention to time, attitude and content.
1, time: The question of time that should be paid attention to when introducing yourself has a double meaning. On the one hand, we should consider when to introduce ourselves. It is generally believed that the best time to introduce yourself to others should be when the other person is free; When the other person is in a good mood; When the other person is interested in getting to know you; When the other person offers to know you, and so on. On the other hand, we should consider how much time we should spend introducing ourselves. Generally speaking, an introduction of about half a minute is enough, and it will not exceed 1 minute at most. Sometimes, a few words and a sentence are used properly and can't be wrong, which takes less than ten seconds.
2. Attitude: When introducing yourself, the attitude must be cordial, natural, friendly and confident. Introducers should have natural expressions, look at each other or everyone, and be good at expressing friendship with eyes, smiles and natural and friendly facial expressions. Don't appear at a loss, red-faced, and don't appear careless and indifferent. When introducing, you can put your right hand on your left chest, don't worry, and don't point your finger at yourself.
3. Content: At the time of introduction, the full name of the introduced person, the company he works for, the specific work undertaken, etc. It is called the three elements that constitute the main content of the introduction. When introducing myself, its content has changed on the basis of three elements. Specifically, according to the differences of self-introduction content, it can be divided into four forms.
The first is entertainment. Suitable for general interpersonal communication, but briefly introduce yourself as follows. Such as "hello! My name is XXX. "
The second is the AC type. It is also suitable for ordinary interpersonal communication, but it is intended to seek communication or mutual exchange. The content can include my name, unit, place of origin, interest, etc. Such as: "Hello! My name is XXX, and I come from Zhejiang. Now I work in a bank. You like watching football. Hey, I am also a football fan. "
The third type is the work type. It takes work as the introduction center and work as a friend. Its content should revolve around my name, unit and the specific nature of my work. Such as: "Hello, ladies and gentlemen! I'm glad to have the opportunity to introduce me to you. My name is XX, and I am the business manager of Haifeng Company, specializing in the marketing of electrical appliances. If possible, I am always willing to serve everyone present. "
The fourth is the etiquette type. Suitable for formal and grand occasions, it is a kind of self-introduction that has to be done out of courtesy. In addition to three essential elements, its content should be accompanied by some kind and humble sentences. Such as: "Hello everyone! Please allow me to introduce myself at this rare opportunity today. My name is XX, and I come from XX Company in Hangzhou. I am the public relations manager of this company. Today, it is my first time to come to the beautiful Xishuangbanna. The beautiful scenery attracted me deeply at once. I am very willing to stay here for a few more days and make friends here. Thank you! "
(2) Introduce others
To introduce others, we must first understand whether the two sides have the desire to get to know each other; Secondly, we should follow the introduction rules; Thirdly, when introducing each other's names and work units, we should find some common conversation materials for both sides, such as their common hobbies, experiences or topics of common interest.
Rules introduced by 1.
Introduce the man to the woman first. Miss Zhang, I'd like you to meet Mr Li.
Introduce young people to old people first. Of the two people of the same sex, the younger one is introduced to the elder first to show respect for the elder and the elder.
Introduce the low status to the high status first. Follow the principle of giving priority to people with high social status. Except in social occasions, introduce people with low social status to those with high social status.
Introduce the unmarried to the married first. If the unmarried woman is obviously older between two women, then introduce the married woman to the unmarried woman.
Introduce the guests to the host.
Introduce the latecomers to the latecomers.
2. Introduction etiquette
(1) Introducer's practice: There should be an opening statement when introducing, such as: "Allow me to introduce you, Miss Zhang, and this is-""Allow me to introduce Mr. Li, and this is-". When introducing others, gesture gracefully. No matter which party is introduced, palms up, hands down, fingers together, thumbs open, pointing to the introduced party, nodding and smiling at the other party. When necessary, you can explain the relationship between the introduced party and yourself so that new friends can understand and trust each other. Introducers should be based on the main sequence, and the language should be clear and unambiguous, so that both parties can clearly remember each other's names. When introducing someone's advantages, it is necessary to be just right, and it is not appropriate to praise them too much and lead to an embarrassing situation.
② Practice of the introduced person: If both parties introduce, they should show the enthusiasm of getting to know each other. Both sides should face each other. Except for ladies and elders, people usually stand up when introducing. However, if there is a meeting in progress or at a banquet, you don't have to stand up, just bow a little. If it is convenient, after the introducer introduces, both sides should shake hands, smile and greet each other. Such as "Hello", "Nice to meet you", "It's an honor to meet you", "Please give me more advice" and "Please take care of me". You can also exchange business cards when necessary.
(3) Collective introduction
If both parties introduce that one of them is an individual and the other is a collective, different measures should be taken according to the specific situation.
1. Introduce someone to you. This method is mainly suitable for the introduction of senior people, senior citizens and special guests of major events. After the introduction, all the guests can get to know the introduced person by themselves.
2. introduce someone to you. This method is suitable for informal social activities, so that those young people or people with low status want to know more people they respect and meet their communication needs, and those with high status and old people are introduced to themselves by others; It is also suitable for formal social occasions, such as leaders meeting with model workers and people with outstanding contributions; It also applies to the introduction of two communication groups on an equal footing; Introduce the people sitting on the podium at the meeting. There are two basic orders to introduce a person to you: one is to introduce by seat or team; The second is to introduce according to the high and low order of identity. Don't introduce at will, so as not to make the newcomers feel biased and affect their mood. Whether you are traveling abroad or on business, if someone invites you to a formal banquet, you need to know some basic etiquette of western social places.
Arrival: You'd better arrive on time, even if you are four or five minutes late, but you must never be more than a quarter of an hour late, otherwise you will be embarrassed. If you go to a rich and elegant family, the first person you meet when you enter the gate may be a man, who is responsible for hanging your clothes or giving you directions, so don't shake hands with him in a hurry, observe and make a decision.
Preparation: enter the living room, don't worry about not finding a seat. Westerners usually walk around on this occasion, waiting for the host to introduce other guests to themselves. You can choose a suitable glass of wine and other drinks from the waiter and chat with others while drinking. When the door of the restaurant is opened, the host and hostess will lead everyone into the restaurant. The host and hostess should go last, but if the host is a big shot, the host and he can go first.
Seating: the rules of western food seating are very particular, and seats are generally arranged. At this time, the gentleman or lady who comes with you will never be arranged to sit next to you. Europeans and Americans think that acquaintances have many opportunities to chat and should take this opportunity to make more friends. The host and hostess sit on the top and bottom of the rectangular table. The male guest sits on the right side of the hostess and the female guest sits on the right side of the host. Other guests are seated alternately by men and women. Before the man goes to the table, he should help the woman on the right to pull out the chair, and then sit down by herself after the woman sits firmly.
After everyone is seated, the host takes the napkin and you take the napkin. Remember: no matter what happens at this time (such as the host has the habit of praying before meals), you can't take the napkin until the host takes it away.
Dining: The general menu is three to five courses. The first three dishes should be cold cuts, soup and fish, the last two dishes are the main course (meat or seafood with vegetables), dessert or fruit, and finally coffee and snacks. When eating, don't focus on the enjoyment of your stomach, and talk to people around you more. If coffee doesn't appear after dessert, you may be invited to the living room for a drink later. In a word, you can put down your napkin and leave your seat after you see the hostess put it on the table and stand up. At this time, the polite man has to stand up and help the lady pull open the chair. The lady who is taken care of doesn't have to have special ideas about this series of attentions, he should.
Farewell: If you don't want to be conspicuous, you'd better not go first or last. In the meantime, you can leave at any time, but once you leave, you should leave quickly.