Anger will be too obvious if it is wasted at home; If the punishment is not correct, the people will be at a loss. The breadth of running a family is fierce and the country is also.
Confucius said, "Don't be extravagant, be frugal; It is better to be practical than to have no grandchildren. "Another cloud said," If the beauty of Duke Zhou's talent makes him arrogant and stingy, the rest is not enough. "However, you can be frugal and don't be stingy. Thrifty is called politeness, and stingy is called poverty. Today, giving is luxury, frugality is meanness; If you can give without extravagance, you can be frugal and generous.
The foundation of the people should be cultivated and eaten. Fruits and vegetables are produced in the garden: chickens and dolphins are born in the circle. And buildings, equipment, firewood, butter candles are not the same thing. In order to keep his business, he can make a living behind closed doors, but there is no salt well at home. Today, the customs of the northern soil can be frugal, frugal and worry-free; Although Jiangnan is luxurious, it is not surprising.
Liang, a China scholar, was too strict in managing his family, so his wife and concubine shared the assassin and killed him when he was drunk.
Celebrities in the world are generous; As for eating and drinking, reducing servants, generous wives, frugal wives, guest insults, and the invasion of the township party: this is also a huge family.
Fang Wenlie, assistant minister of the official department of Qi State, was not angry. After the rain, he was deprived of food, sent a maid to cook, and escaped for three or four days before he was caught back. Xu Fang said, "The whole family has no food. Where are you from? " No beatings. When I want to send someone home, the handmaiden goes home to get a little salary. I listened and didn't say a word.
The so-called custom education is carried out from top to bottom and from front to back. Therefore, if the father is not kind, the children will not be filial; If the elder brother is unfriendly, the younger brother will be disrespectful; A husband is heartless, but a wife is disobedient. As for a kind father and disobedient children, a kind and rude brother, a kind husband and a lewd wife, they are all born villains. They should be subdued with punishment, not admonished and taught to change them.
If there is no punishment at home, the child's fault will soon appear; If the punishment is not applied properly, the people will be at a loss. Managing the family with leniency and severity is like managing the country and leveling the world.
Confucius said, "extravagance is disrespectful, and frugality is humble." It is better to be modest than to be disobedient. "He added:" If someone has the talent and virtue of the Duke of Zhou, as long as he is proud and stingy, there is nothing else to mention. "In this way, we should be frugal rather than stingy. Thrift is the salvation of etiquette; Misery has no sympathy for poor and dangerous people. Nowadays people are willing to give alms, but they are also extravagant, frugal and stingy. It would be nice if we could give alms without extravagance and be thrifty without meanness.
The people's survival depends on growing crops and food, and growing mulberry and hemp and clothes. Stored vegetables and fruits are produced in orchards; Chickens, pigs and other delicacies are kept in henhouses and pigsty. There are also household utensils, firewood candles, which are the products of farming and breeding. The person who can manage the family business best has enough necessities even if he stays at home, but he lacks a salt well at home. Now the customs in the north are generally frugal, and clothes and meals are guaranteed. Most luxury goods in the south of the Yangtze River are inferior to those in the north.
When Liang was emperor, there was a calligrapher in China who lacked scale and was too strict in running the family. His wife and concubine jointly bribed the assassin and killed him when he was drunk.
Celebrities in the world are always generous and kind, but the food they entertain their guests is reduced by domestic slaves, and the things they promise to support are deducted by their wives, and even they despise their guests and infringe on their neighbors. This is also a huge disaster for the family.
Fang Wenlie, assistant minister of the official department of the Qi Dynasty, never lost his temper. Once, because of the continuous rainstorm, his family had no food. He sent a maid to buy rice, but she took the opportunity to escape. It took three or four days to catch her. Fang Wenlie said calmly, "The whole family has nothing to eat. Where have you been? " I didn't even use a fishing rod. Fang Wenlie once lent his house to others. The handmaiden in that man's house demolished the house for firewood, and it was almost gone. He just frowned and didn't say a word.
The original Pei had relatives who were too hungry to help themselves and were adopted; My family is poor, and when there are floods and droughts, two stone meters are porridge, so I can only live, bow my head, and often enjoy it. There are leaders under power, and greed is already high. His children are 800, and his vows are more than 1000. Every morning and evening, everyone cooks according to the standard of 15 yuan, which is even more difficult when there are guests' trips. After sitting in the back, he was in trouble. With his family property, Ma Xie has a house, a few treasures, and the rest are indescribable. There are people who live in Aobao in Nanyang, and their nature is extremely frugal and stingy. After the solstice winter, their son-in-law saluted them. They set a bronze wine and counted the meat. I hate my single rate, it's done overnight. The master was startled, and the ball was beneficial, and so on; Retreat and blame the daughter: "A certain lang is good at wine, so you are often poor." After his death, the philosophers fought for money, and his brother killed his younger brother.
Pei Yezi adopted any of his distant relatives and old families who did not have enough food and clothing. His family is poor and often encounters floods and droughts. He cooks porridge with two stones of rice, which is hardly allowed to be eaten by everyone. He also eats with everyone, never showing a complaining expression. He has a general who greedily amasses wealth. There are already 800 servants in his family, and he vowed to add 1000. In the morning and evening, everyone's food is subject to fifteen pence, and guests come without extra food. Later, when he was investigated for breaking the law, he found that his family had a room full of old clothes and several warehouses from Ma Xie, and the remaining treasures were countless. There was a man in Nanyang who was rich, but very stingy. After the solstice winter, his son-in-law came to see him. He only prepared a copper pot of wine and a few pieces of roe deer meat The son-in-law thought he was too simple and slow, so he ate it all. The man was taken aback and reluctantly ordered his servant to add more. After adding a few times, he turned to scold his daughter and said, "Your husband loves to drink, so you have been poor." After his death, several sons competed for the inheritance, and the elder brother actually killed the younger brother.
The original marriage is right, and the rules in Hou Cheng are perfect. Modern married, there are women who sell money, women who buy silk, and parents who take care of money, which is no different from the market. Or the husband is at the door, or the arrogant woman is good at the room, greedy for glory and profit, ashamed and not observing! Lend people classics, so be sure to keep them well. If there is any defect first, it is to make up. This is also one of the things that a scholar-bureaucrat is best at. Jiang Lu, a native of Jiyang, has not finished his studies. Although he is in a hurry, he will wait until he is tied up neatly and then get up, so that he will not lose money and people will never cheat. Or there are a few cases where the wolf is confused and the scattered parts are destroyed. Most of them are polluted by children, girls and concubines, and destroyed by wind, rain, insects and rats. Really tired. Every time I read a saint's book, I have no disrespect; Its old paper has the meaning of "Five Classics" and the name of a wise man, which should not be misused.
My wizard's prayers are beyond words; Zhang Fushu didn't pray, which is what Cao Cao saw. Don't be silly.
The ancestor Hou Jing made a rule that a man should choose a poor family when he marries a woman. In recent years, in marriage, some people covet the bride price to sell their daughters and send silks to buy their daughters-in-law. When choosing a spouse for a child, comparing the power of the other elder, calculating the amount of bride price and bargaining are no different from doing business. As a result, the elected son-in-law is obscene and the married daughter-in-law is overbearing. They covet self-interest, but bring shame. Can such a thing be sloppy?
When you borrow other people's books, you must take good care of them. When you borrow a book, you have to repair it, which is also one of the literati all the virtues. Lu Jiang is a native of Jiyang. Even if there is something urgent, he should put his schoolbag away before getting up to avoid damage. He borrows books from others, and others are not bored. Some people put books on the console table at will. Most of those scattered volumes are defiled by children, handmaiden and concubines, and damaged by wind and rain, moths and mice, which is really immoral. Every time I read the works of sages, I have never been serious and respectful. If there are words in the scriptures or the names of wise men on the paper, don't dare to use them in dirty places
We never invite witches or wizards to pray in our house; There is no need to set up a Dojo to pray for disaster relief. You saw it with your own eyes. Don't waste money on these superstitious and illusory things.
Family is a sacred harbor, and the boat of love is anchored here. Our family and I are in this harbor, sheltering from the wind and rain, and spending day after day. The harbor needs to be maintained and the family needs to be governed, and our purest wish can be summed up in four simple words, that is, to live a good life.
In Managing the Family, the author advocates attaching importance to family education and managing the family diligently. He also emphasized that family management should be moderate and not lenient. In addition, the author also expressed his views on money, marriage, books, prayer and other issues closely related to ancient family life. These are China's ancient orthodox family views, from which we can learn some ancient life concepts.
Compared with the big family in feudal society, today's family structure is relatively simple. Family management rules in agricultural society have not fully adapted to today's society, but setting an example and being thrifty are the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, and modern families should fully inherit them. In addition, the charity spirit of "giving without extravagance, saving without thrift" advocated by the ancients is particularly worth thinking about and learning from today.