1

In the movie "A Chinese Odyssey", Fairy Zi Xia said, "My soul mate is a hero of the world, and one day she will wear golden clothes and step on seven colors of clouds to marry me".

Perhaps this sentence is not only the inner monologue of Fairy Zi Xia, but also the monologue of most women who are in love. Before getting involved in feelings, everyone fantasized that they could meet those sweet loves in the movies, but when they fell in love, they became fools again, only caring about what the other party gave them, but ignoring what the other party gave them.

To put it simply, this relationship is not sweet at all, even especially bitter in the eyes of others, but you will always feel particularly sweet.

"evenly matched" and "suitable for each other" are words that we are used to distinguish between the sweetness and bitterness of a relationship, because in our opinion, only people with the same energy can live a prosperous life together.

it's easy to fall in love because of the five senses, but it's difficult to get along with each other, because from three perspectives, when you marry the right person, your married life is happy, but when you marry the wrong person, your married life may be a chicken feather.

The balance between right and wrong is often how well you know about someone's family of origin when you decide to spend the rest of your life with them!

2

A few days ago, a female reader talked to me about her five-year love story with her ex-boyfriend. For the time being, she called her Yaoyao (a pseudonym). Originally, the two planned to get the marriage certificate, so they asked their parents to meet and discuss the wedding. Unexpectedly, Yaoyao took the initiative to break up less than a month after getting the certificate.

Yaoyao's ex-boyfriend is his immediate senior, one year older than her. They met in an experimental class, and Yaoyao's boyfriend worked as a laboratory assistant, who was responsible for guiding students in the basic operation of the experiment.

After several experimental classes, Yaoyao was attracted by his humor and asked for his contact information. Just then, I will catch up with the final exam of the experimental class. When I meet a question that I can't, Yaoyao runs to ask him.

The beginning of Yaoyao's love with her boyfriend is described by an idiom: Love grows with time. One to two, with the increase of intersection, the two gradually rubbed out a small flame of love.

Love at first sight, in the process of getting along, couples will have behaviors: arguments, quarrels, cold war, breaking up ...

Although Yaoyao quarreled with her boyfriend and mentioned breaking up in recent years, their feelings can still withstand the toss of life and time.

No, not long ago, two people went to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get a marriage certificate.

After getting the license, her boyfriend offered to take her to her hometown (her boyfriend's family of origin) to see it, and let her get familiar with the environment there in advance. Yaoyao didn't think much about it, so she thought about going out for a walk.

Actually, Yaoyao, my boyfriend's parents, met them and had dinner together several times (all in restaurants), but Yaoyao, my boyfriend's hometown, has never been there once.

However, after living in her boyfriend's hometown for a few days, Yaoyao suddenly regretted it.

Yaoyao's regret is not because her boyfriend's parents didn't greet her well. On the contrary, her boyfriend's parents were very kind to her. She regrets because she was dissatisfied with the way her boyfriend's parents got along.

For three meals a day at home, Yaoyao's mother-in-law is busy with all the livestock raised, while her father-in-law waits for her mother-in-law to get the food ready.

after eating, my father-in-law wipes his mouth and leaves the table, either going out for a walk or watching TV in the room. My mother-in-law always eats several meals late because she needs to see the raised livestock first.

Sometimes, after my father-in-law has finished eating, my mother-in-law is still busy feeding the livestock. My father-in-law only knows when the meal is ready and doesn't wait for her mother-in-law to eat together.

My mother-in-law's waist is not very good. Every rainy day, she will get sick, and she will inevitably make a noise when she does housework. But my father-in-law has never gone up to help her share some housework, or cares about her, so she just stays there and watches TV, and sometimes even hates her!

If my mother-in-law's cooking doesn't suit my father-in-law's appetite, or if my mother-in-law doesn't do what he asks, my father-in-law will be furious with her, and my mother-in-law won't dare to say a word.

3

After coming back from her parents-in-law, Yaoyao asked her boyfriend, "Why didn't you persuade your father to love your mother more?"

"I don't think there's anything wrong with my dad doing this. My dad works hard outside every day, and of course my mother has to do the housework!"

Yaoyao was particularly dissatisfied with the way her father-in-law got along with her mother-in-law, especially her father-in-law's attitude towards her mother-in-law. Her boyfriend's words made her feel even more uncomfortable.

There is a saying that your marriage is just a continuation of your parents' marriage. After returning from her in-laws, Yaoyao couldn't help thinking about her cohabitation with her boyfriend in this year. < P > The way her father-in-law and mother-in-law get along with each other is not a projection of her cohabitation with her boyfriend in this year.

Although the two people seldom cook and eat at home this year (basically they eat in the canteens of their respective companies), Yaoyao is the one who cooks every time, and she is the one who cleans the kitchen.

Every time he was asked to do some housework, he would take various reasons to avoid it. Once, Yaoyao even had a big fight with him because he didn't do housework and went to play games.

I always say, "I've been working all day, how can I have the strength to do housework? Besides, shouldn't these things be done by you women?" Every time I hear what he said, Yaoyao gets angry in his heart.

With this in mind, Yaoyao can't help worrying about her married life and becoming a housewife like her mother-in-law. So she made a pact with her boyfriend: either get rid of bad habits or break up early!

But just after the daytime, her boyfriend made the same mistake in the evening, and he still tried to avoid housework. After the argument, he lost his previous attitude of letting her go. After the last straw, Yaoyao took the initiative to break up with him.

4

When talking about the relationship between father and mother, Yang Jiang said:

"Father respects and cares for mother, and mother understands and supports her father's maverick. This kind of husband-wife relationship of equal treatment is rare in the old society where husband power is the mainstay, and it is also rare between husband and wife in the old days."

Most of the time, our marriage is the continuation of our parents' marriage, and our parents, as our first teachers, will have their shadow in our words and deeds more or less.

After experiencing this failed relationship, Yaoyao said this from the bottom of her heart: "I regret that I didn't go to his house earlier after getting the certificate for three days!"

There are many women in the relationship who have the same experience as Yaoyao. They only think about each other's love for themselves, so they can get married and live together, without thinking about seeing each other's family of origin at all.

To see the other person's family of origin is not only to see the material gap between your families, but also to see what his family of origin can export.

For example, family of origin can give him the way to get along with each other's parents in marriage, their three views and their evaluation in others' eyes.

When we are in love, we can choose the person who is kind to ourselves, but not when we get married. The kindness given by the other person can only be used as a reference, not a decisive factor, because if a person can give you kindness, he can also take it back.

Writer Lu Qi once said, "Small things depend on personality, big things depend on personality, and life depends on habits."

The man who really loves you is that you like spicy hot pot, and I can also order beef with clear soup. Although the tastes are different, we respect each other. The tacit understanding of two people's love begins with eating and penetrates into life.

In marriage, only when two people respect each other can they have a sweet life, and they can never get tired of looking at each other.

When you get to know each other's family of origin better, you can know whether the other person is consistent with your three views, and you can tolerate and respect each other in the right marriage.