Degang Guo Yuqian 2005 165438+ 10/2 Beijing Tianqiao Music
A: Introduce him, mainly.
B: Why do you mainly introduce me?
This man's name is Yu Qian.
B: It's me.
A: My idol.
Well, not at all.
A: celebrities,
B: No.
A: It's amazing. Go to this stop. Hey.
B: That's it.
A: How energetic! Look at this face, eyes like meatballs, ears like jiaozi, nose like garlic, hair like vermicelli, beard like kelp, tofu mouth, broad bean teeth, and this messy head in Northeast China.
A can of vegetables.
A: It's famous.
B: Not famous.
A: People envy going there, so I envy you.
Oh, you envy me.
When can I be as happy as you?
B: I'm fine.
A: Celebrities are easy to mix. They can do anything.
Not exactly.
A: When do I park there?
What's the matter with you?
I see people living in houses with cars. I really envy them. Do you think it is wrong for me to pursue a happy life?
B: That's right.
A: Isn't it?
B: Of course.
A: I must be happy.
B: That's right.
A: I want to start a business. I must make a fortune.
B: ok, send it.
A: First of all, I must have a good body.
Oh, exercise.
A: Fortunately, I don't drink.
B: Oh, no problem.
A: I don't play mahjong.
I don't like playing cards
I just smoke a little more.
I like smoking.
A: Then I watched a health program on TV, saying that smoking is harmful to health and easy to die suddenly.
B: That's right.
A: It scared me. I gritted my teeth and stamped my foot to hit this.
B: Quit smoking?
I won't watch this program.
B: Give up the show. what do you think? this is
For my health.
B: Ah! Is it for health? this is
A: I want to be happy. I'm afraid people will look down on me.
That's true.
A: I am a serious person. I am a naive and conservative citizen. I am careless in all kinds of martial arts, warm-hearted, ready to help others, and I have to help if I have difficulties.
B: You have created difficulties for others.
I'm afraid people will look down on me. The gas station at the door makes me very angry.
B: Then how can I find you?
A: They all drive there to refuel, adding 200 yuan and 300 yuan, and then there are gifts.
B: Give a newspaper or something.
A: Here is the map.
B: It's better this way.
A big map for each person. I'll go too, pushing my scooter.
B: Motorcycles.
A: Add 10 yuan.
B: 10 yuan.
A: That's all. Where can I get a map?
B: mainly maps.
What do you need that thing for? Where can you go?
B: Not far.
A: didn't you give it when you refueled? Give me one. Where are you going? You tell me and I'll show you.
B: Just point.
A: well, I'm so angry.
Don't be so carefree.
A: Look down on me. I am a person with strong self-esteem. Ah ~ ~ ~, let me show you.
Why do you want it?
A: There is a Cantonese tea restaurant in front of our house. Rich people go there for breakfast in the morning.
Have morning tea.
A: Me too.
Are you going?
A: why do you want to fry the liver?
Oh, no.
A: Stride forward and pay 100 yuan.
Hmm.
A: Dad.
oh
A: Breakfast 100 yuan.
B: Breakfast 100 yuan.
Sorry, sir, we don't sell half of it.
B: 100 yuan and a half.
A: It hurts self-esteem.
Yes, it is.
A: I went again at noon.
B: Still going?
A: Still sitting in that seat, looking for a waiter. Come here! Do you have lobster?
B: Lobster?
Oh, yes, sir. Do you have a two-foot lobster?
B: Such a big one.
A: Let me show you. I'll be back soon. Excuse me, sir. It's two feet two, huh! What stupid restaurant doesn't even have two feet of lobster. A plate of shredded potatoes
Well, it's still shredded potatoes.
I got my revenge, I got my revenge.
Ah, it was cut short.
A: I can't compete with others.
B: You are better than others.
I must have everything that others have.
B: Yes.
A: I want everything that others don't have. Come and sit at my door. I will also buy a big plasma TV at home.
B: You buy one, too.
A: I'll ask a friend to save one for me.
One more plasma TV?
Answer: Save one, the wall is so big.
B: That big.
Big TV, Motorola brand.
Does Motorola have a TV?
A: Looking at nobody, a voice came from the TV: "The TV you are watching has stopped!" "
B: the TV is out of service.
A: That's evil. Ah, there is no reason. This 300 yuan is wasted.
B: Isn't it a waste of money?
I suspect that he asked a carpenter to call me.
B: In that case, there will be no sound.
A: Anyway, I want to be happy. I want to be a person.
B: Oh.
I listen to symphony, I watch ballet and I watch tap dance.
B: OK.
Tate, let's tap dance abroad. I like this. I just like tap dancing and allegro, and I don't like anything else.
B: You two are not next to each other. Far from it.
A: It's the same. One hand ring, the other hand ring at the foot. I just like watching it. I sat in the front row and a shoe flew down from it.
B: Shoes?
A: To err is human. I went again the next day.
Do you cherish this?
I want to collect that one.
Thank you for going there.
I wish I could make a pair.
B: Ah.
A: I want to be happy.
Okay, you want to be happy.
A: I can't let others compare. Walking in the street, how can I have money?
Think about it.
How can I be happy enough? A car passed by, and it just passed. It rained all over me, and he drove away, and I was all wet. I was so angry that I drank it. You're amazing. You're amazing.
B: That's bullying.
A: Didn't I teach you five stresses and four beauties when I bought a car?
B: Why do you want to talk about this when buying a car?
A: Don't you have one more cover than a tricycle?
Far from it.
A: Do you think your driving status is high? Huh? You are a hooligan after education, you know?
I am educated.
A: Turn around. I'll find a brick to shoot him. Kick dawdle over there two policemen, "stop it! What are you doing? " "shopping"
B: Look at your nonsense.
Answer: "ID card, temporary residence permit, employment permit" "I am a local" "Do you think local people take a brick to go shopping?"
B: Not even in town.
Listen to me. I am a good person. Don't worry. Hey, there was a witness as soon as I turned around, and my girlfriend was on the phone over there.
B: Oh, the date.
A: Hey, my girlfriend is on the phone over there, and my girlfriend and her boyfriend are on the phone over there.
B: Wait a minute. You're crazy. Your girlfriend came with her boyfriend?
A: Have some more coke.
B: Poor thing! How did this-how did this come about?
A: They came with their arms around them.
B: ok, please don't say this posture.
A: Grow flowers.
B: growing flowers?
Huayang, my girlfriend.
Your girlfriend's name is Huayang?
A: Yes, compound surnames are water-based.
B: easy virtue!
A: Come on, come on. I've been looking for you for two months, but you haven't called me back. "Who is this?" This is my boyfriend. Hello, hello, hello.
B: That's very kind of you.
A: He is more polite than me: "Hello, senior." "What's the matter with you? Huayang, I can't find you. " "I forgot to tell you, let's break up." "Why are you like this? I didn't see you for two months and I was laid off? "
Are you fired?
A: "I am having a hard time now. I don't make money in business, and my friends have abandoned me. "
B: What?
A: "You are the only one left. You can't do this. I am sincere to you. For you, everything is worth it except death. "
That's not good, you.
A: "Don't talk nonsense, ah, don't talk nonsense. I'll tell you what is not enough to eat and what can't be done. Do you know? " "Go, go, go, ok, I wish you happiness, ah!"
No shame.
She is very happy. What should I do?
B: Yes.
A: I'm so angry, my brick,
What are you doing?
A: The policeman asked me, "What are you doing!" "I threw it aside so as not to trip people."
B: You are very clever this time.
I don't like it.
B: Ah, I'm sorry.
Where is my happy life? Look at the watch, it's time for dinner, next to the hotel, I pushed the door and went in, throwing caution to the wind.
B: I'm in.
A: However, I brought the menu. "What would you like to eat, sir?" "No food, no food,"
No food?
A: Fried rice, shark fin fried rice and a bowl of 80 yuan.
B: Fried rice with shark's fin.
A: I am desperate, but I can't get through.
B: OK, OK.
A: A bowl of shark fin fried rice was served at 80. I searched with chopsticks, but I couldn't find shark fin for ten minutes.
B: Looking for shark fin?
A: "Get me the chef." Here comes the cook, fatty. "Why?" "I ask you, my 80 yuan shark's fin fried rice, spent ten minutes didn't find shark's fin, can you tell me where the shark's fin is? ! ""My name is shark's fin. "
Too bad. just
A: "Nice to meet you. Thank you. "
Don't be rude to anyone
I can't eat without him!
B: How can I eat without shark's fin?
A: I am a self-respecting person. Get up, run to the bathroom and stand in front of the big mirror. The water sprayed on your face. "cough"
B: Down, down (old four)
A: "You are a great person."
Talk to the mirror.
Degang Guo, I admire your efforts. It must be spring.
Sing a happy song.
You'll succeed. You will succeed, I wish you happiness, and you will be happy. Yes! I turned around and stood at the door of the bathroom. (Sighing) My heart calmed down a lot. A man came out of the bathroom.
B: (surprised expression) You have been in the ladies' room for half a day. Be careful. Go inside.
A: nobody told me either.
You have to tell me this.
A: It's too dangerous. I ran away.
B: Run.
A: The last two groups chased me.
B: how to dial twice?
A: It was the cook who said, "Give me the shark fin money!" A woman came out of the ladies' room, pulling her husband. "Hit him, hit him. It was him just now. I dare not come out. He talks nonsense in the mirror. " Guys, come and beat me up,
B: None of them are right.
A: Grab my head and hit it. There is a shutter door next to it. Shake, shake, shake with my head. The door opened and an old man came out. "What can I buy?"
Are you shopping?
A: "Beater" and "Oh" Hua.
B: Hey, look at your popularity.
A: inhumane. Although I have traveled the Jianghu, I have gone forward bravely. He's human, too. It hurts to be beaten, and I vomit after drinking too much.
B: Nonsense.
A: Qiang struggled to move forward. Why? I want to be happy.
B: That's right.
A: Why do they all spend 4000 yuan on cars, villas and perfumes? No one in our hutong has ever earned 1000 yuan.
B: (surprised) Yes!
I go to work by bike. I made 400 yuan this month.
B: Boy.
Answer: Wash clothes with alkaline noodles and steamed salted duck eggs on your birthday.
Living in a slum.
A: I want to get rich. I swear to myself, walking in the street and shouting "I want to be happy!" " "Just go forward, the car rang behind me. As soon as I turned around, several cars arrived, including urban management and joint law enforcement. I ran away.
What are you running for?
Do you care? Run, I run
This is too much.
I ran through three hutongs. There is a kebab on the roadside, and there are more than 100 pieces on the shelf. I grabbed it and "I'll give you money when I'm finished." I am eating. The joint law enforcement car came and the boy ran away with the stove.
You have this mind. Why don't you take the right path?
A: This is my happiness. So I can eat baked sweet potatoes, which are necessary for buying CDs.
B: Any booth will do.
A: I want to be happy.
Don't bring it up all the time.
A: I must be happy. I can't live like this. Is it enough for me to eat some mutton skewers?
B: Not satisfied.
A: The first step
What about the second step?
A: Fight for me. I earn 500 thousand a month.
Are you out of your mind?
I'll call. I will start today.
Oh, 500 thousand.
I earn at least 500 thousand a month
How do you earn it?
A: I am afraid of selling my kidneys, but I will earn 500,000 yuan.
B: You don't have a kidney.
A: I'll sell you another one.
What are you doing with me?
A: I must be happy. I do business.
Business?
A: Big business. what are you going to do？ Hey, do you think the terracotta warriors and horses of Qin Shihuang are valuable?
B: This is very valuable.
What if I bring one? Carry it to Vietnam, and I will make a fortune by selling it. Come on, come on. Perform two
B: There are two of you. The security guards will count the number of people every night.
A: Really?
B: Ah.
A: so advanced?
What do you see?
A: This math is not good, so it can't be counted. Take two out, he counted … hey, are you and your father free now?
B: Why?
A: I put mud on your father and stood there. I'm going to sell the money and come back to pick you up.
B: What if it can't be sold?
Look.
Don't look, you'll die. We can't be father and son.
A: Did you see this humanity this time?
B: Is this called human nature?
A: You can't support my happiness.
B: I can't support it.
A: I'll do it myself!
B: Help yourself.
I made a big deal. I empty the stove at home.
B: Why?
A: Doing business.
What business?
A: Pet crematorium
B: This is the first time I've heard of it.
Nowadays, people have dogs and cats. If you don't keep them, you will die.
B: That's right.
A: Bring it here.
B: Why?
A: I cooked it for you. When it's finished, get a box and take it home when it's done. This is a kind of mind reading.
B: ashes
Nobody did it.
Yes, no one does.
A: Its name is Feizhi, isn't it? After the opening, business was booming.
Oh, someone's coming.
A: Everyone is here to burn. There are cats and dogs. Of course, there are also troublemakers.
B: Yes.
A: Ah, 500. "How much is it?" I said, "It was written by 500." It is connected to that, with a boundary of 35 cm, 500 below and 800 above.
Oh, yes.
A: "Can I give this to 20?" "You hate,"
B: 20?
I want 500 pounds. Remember "500 under 35 cm"? "No way, are you that hard to burn a cricket?"
B: Can crickets burn?
A: "Don't talk nonsense, rules, you know!"
B: There is no price.
A: "I didn't burn one for him at 1000 yesterday.
B: What?
A: Camels.
B: that can't be burned either.
A: I won't burn it for you.
B: It's not that big.
A: "Go! Go! " "I'm going? I really don't care, do I? Go, give me the mutton string! "