1. The principal and the English teacher went to visit a French high school together. The principal spoke in the auditorium and the English teacher translated.

Principal: "Teachers, students!"

English teacher: "ladies and gentlemen!"

Principal: "Ladies and gentlemen!"

English teacher -_-! After thinking about it, she said, "Good morning!"

Principal: "Good morning!"

English teacher: ...... == "Khan

2. Said there is a polar bear, because the snow is too blinding, you must wear sunglasses to see things, but he could not find the sunglasses, so he closed his eyes and crawled around on the ground to look for, crawling, crawling, crawling, crawling, crawling, crawling on his hands and feet are dirty before he found the sunglasses. He found the sunglasses. Put on the sunglasses, a look in the mirror, which realized: Oh, so I am a panda

3. A polar bear stayed alone on the ice, really bored, began to pull their own hair to play, one, two, three, and finally pulled one of them left, and then he died of cold.

4. Once upon a time there was a bird who passed a cornfield every day, but unfortunately, one day there was a fire in that cornfield, and all the corn turned into popcorn!!!! After the little bird flew past ...... thinking it was snowing, he died of cold.

5. Xiao Ming new haircut, the next day came to school, his classmates saw his new hairstyle, laughed: Xiao Ming, your head shape seems like a kite oh! Xiao Ming felt very aggrieved, so he ran outside and cried, crying, he flew.

6. The spider fell in love with the butterfly, but the butterfly rejected it, the spider asked: why? This is why! Butterfly said: my mom said, all day in the network are not good people．

7. One hot summer day, two bananas walking on the road. Walking in front of the banana suddenly feel so hot, he said, so hot oh, I want to take off the clothes. As a result, he peeled off his skin. As a result, the banana behind him fell down. Then the undressed banana became a dried banana~

8. One day, the three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope", which was said to be full of things they wanted if they stood at the edge of the valley and shouted out what they wanted in their hearts and then jumped down into the valley. So the three of them decided to give it a try.

The first one was a lecher, so he shouted "Woman! Woman!" He jumped down and there was a pit full of beautiful women waiting for him.

The second was a nerd, so he yelled "Book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book, book!" Then, he jumped into the valley and got a pit full of books.

The third was an indecisive man, who couldn't decide on his favorite, and after an hour, he finally made up his mind that the money was the most useful, so he walked to the valley. He accidentally kicked a stone, he cursed "shit!" unexpectedly an unsteady center of gravity fell down the valley.

9. Xiao Ming, on tomorrow's exam nest, but the night is watching TV

Xiao Ming's mother asked worried: books are finished? Tomorrow's exam is coming up

Xiaoming answered quickly: "Mom, I'm done.

Xiaoming's mother praised him happily: "Good boy, you must do well in the exam tomorrow"

Xiaoming cried and said: "Mom, I mean, 'Mom, I'm done reading.

10. The panda was y in love with the deer and was rejected when he expressed his love. The panda roared ~ Why? What's the point of all this? The panda said: "My mom said that those who wear sunglasses are delinquents"

11. One day Xiao Ming was walking along the road! As he walked he suddenly felt his feet were sore! Why is that? Because Xiao Ming stepped on a lemon!

12. Which of the Chinese characters is the coolest? Thong (cool)

The word for "scarf" says to the word for "coin": "Son. If you wear a doctor's hat, you'll be worth a hundred times as much.

"Ruler" said to "exhaustion": sister, the results came out. You are pregnant with twins.

The "minister" said to the "giant": the same area as you. But I have three rooms and two bathrooms.

13. One day, a university teacher asked a student, there are ten birds on the tree, shoot one, how many left?

The student asked back: Is it a silent pistol? Not how loud is the gun?80-100 decibels. Is it illegal to shoot birds in this town? No. Are you sure the bird was actually killed? Yes, I'm sure. By this time, the teacher was getting impatient: ", just tell me how many birds are left, OK. Are there any deaf birds in the tree? No. Are there any caged birds hanging on the tree? No. Are there any other trees on the side of the tree, and are there any other birds on the tree? No. If a bird is pregnant, does that count as a baby in the belly? No. Did the bird hunter's eyes glaze over? No flowers, just ten. The teacher is already sweating and the bell is ringing, but the students continue to ask: Are there any birds that are so stupid that they are not afraid to die? All of them are afraid of death. Will you kill two birds with one shot? No. The student said confidently: "If your answer is not a lie," killed the bird if it hangs in the tree and does not fall, then there is one left, if it falls, there is no one left. The teacher immediately fell to the ground foaming at the mouth!

14. One day, someone passed by the intersection, found a super scary thing, he found Kakashi and the Monkey King actually laughing!

15.A long, long time ago, one night, there were three shrimp in the pond, hahaha, a female ghost farted to death.

16. A female alien who was engaged in biological research came to Earth, and after going around, she felt that there was a lot to learn from human genes, so she captured a man and wanted to bring him back together with textual information about human genes. But the ship is too small to take him with her, and the data is too large to be carried all at once. Anxious, the ship's computer help system said: "This man has a small stick on him that can solve all your problems ......" At this point she realized, smiled and drooled and said to the man: "。。。。。 Give me the flash drive!" .

17.There is a trap is crossing the road, the result is accidentally deflated by the truck, he was dying when he looked at his own body, he said: "It turns out that I'm stuffed with bean paste, not meat"

18.Big brother, you don't touch in! You touched the top and touched the bottom, the hairs let you touch off, so tender skin, were you touching the water! How can I sell them in the future? This peach is fresh, you don't buy it, forget about it!

19. Once upon a time there was a little sheep, one day he went out to play, and ran into the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf said: I'm going to eat you! The lamb was shocked! Guess what happened? The big bad wolf ate the lamb.

20. Once upon a time, there was a swordsman who was very cold, his heart was very cold, his sword was very cold, and he died of cold

21. Once upon a time, there was a tiger chasing a deer on the road! Yay for tomato sauce!

23. The soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a landmine in combat? The company commander was greatly annoyed: Damn, what can be done? Stepped on the damaged at the price of compensation.

24. One day, the three little pigs built three huts to hide from the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf did not bother to blow up the grass hut, the wooden hut, the brick hut, the three little pigs ran as hard as they could, but they were still being chased by the big bad wolf. The three little pigs said in despair, "You do as you please. We give up, as you how. At this time, the big bad wolf smiled wickedly, leaving saliva, said: then quickly tell me where the little red hat?

25. Elephant defecate in the middle of the road, an ant just passing by, it looked up at the cloudy summit, can not help but sing: yalasuo, this is the Tibetan plateau! ~~~~

26. In the railroad next to the large but did not bring paper, do not worry, the train will remind you: pants wipe, pants wipe, pants wipe! When you're tuba by the river but don't have any paper, don't worry, the frog will tell you: stick-scrape, stick-scrape, stick-scrape!

27. There are two counterfeit bills accidentally made the face value of 15 yuan of fake bills, the two decided to take to the remote mountainous areas to spend, when they took a 15 yuan to buy a 1 yuan sugar gourd good, they cried, the farmers found them two 7 yuan.

28. Someone's newly installed phone happens to be a movie theater to return the lease, so often people call to ask about the screening of the film, at first, he was always a good explanation of the phone is not a movie theater, and now it has been his, please do not call again in the future, the days a long time, he also felt good annoyance, and then received this type of phone call on the brief: "You're playing the wrong! You've got the wrong number!" This also saves some breath. One day a familiar voice came from the other side: "May I ask what movie is now in theaters?" As usual, he said, "You have the wrong number!" After a moment of silence, the other party replied, "Is it a domestic or foreign movie?

29. A man climbed the wall out of the school, was caught by the principal, the principal asked: why not go through the school gate? Answer: Metersbonwe, do not go out of the ordinary. The principal asked: how to go over such a high wall ah? He pointed to his pants and said: Li Ning, anything is possible.

The principal asked again: what does it feel like to go over the wall? He pointed to his shoes and said: TB, the feeling of flying. On the 2nd day he entered the school from the main entrance, the principal asked: how not over the wall? He said: Anta, I choose, I like. On the 3rd day he wore mixed clothes, the principal said: can not wear mixed clothes! He said: Wear what you want, Samma Clothing. Day 4 he wore an undershirt to school, and the principal said, No undershirts to school. He said, man, simple is good, love Stirrup Castle clothing. The principal says, "I'm going to have to give you a hard time. He said, "Why? The principal said, the dynamic zone, my place I make the decision.

30 life is really no fun, last month one of my buddies borrowed 4,000 dollars from me, said to go to do a plastic surgery, the results are now completely unaware of what he has become, Oh4000.

31. Note to robbers: Our staff only speaks Spanish, so please be patient and bring a translator with you.

32. Are you blind? You can't see a big shield like that and you're throwing rocks at my head!

33.I think I should go on a diet, the last time I gave blood, I actually shed a hundred milliliters of lard.

34. Tourist: Master, may I ask that straw house over there is a toilet? Monk: Except for that straw house, the rest of the place is a toilet.

35. Hair goes without a trace, dandruff is more outstanding!

36. Poop and pee are good brothers, one day the poop crossed the road and was hit by a car and died, the pee said: I want to poop ah...

37. Yesterday I signed up for a weight loss training class, and they want me to wear loose clothes during the training, outrageous? If there are still baggy clothes, then why did I sign up?

38.My wife and I haven't spoken in 18 months and I don't get to interrupt her.

39. Thief A: Count how much money a **** robbed today? Thief B: No need, just read the newspaper tomorrow.

40. Stand taller, piss farther

41. Go your own way, let others take a taxi.

42. Wear other people's shoes, go your own way, let them find it.

43. Late one night, a young woman was passing by a mental hospital when suddenly there was a "wow" from behind. The woman turned her head and saw a naked man coming after her. The woman was so scared that she ran, but the man behind her was in hot pursuit. Not good, the front is a dead end, the woman all thoughts, kneeling on the ground, crying and begging: "You are willing to do what you want to do, just please do not kill me." The man smiled wryly and said: "Really? Then now you start chasing me."

44. A cultural evening, the host on stage to report: the following please enjoy: Xinjiang song and dance, lift your skull! The whole audience is silent, creepy!!!! Chill~~~

45. The tiger does not send a cat, you think I am sick ah!

46. Our dormitory a person who drank too much to go pee and then bring out a cold saying: urine drink more, wine is especially much.

47. and my sister went to Li-Ning to buy shoes, my sister opened her mouth: "Miss, how much is a pound of these shoes?"

48. Previously, others came to my aunt's house as a guest, just entered the door. It just so happened that my aunt had to go to the toilet. She quickly greeted the guests and said, "You sit ha sit ha, I'll go to the toilet to pour you some tea!"

49. University, a classmate and I argued the issue, a moment in the wind, in the heat of the moment, a slap on the table to get up and yell: you're crazy, I'm not not stupid! I spit in your face shit

50. When I was a child, popsicle ice-cream is usually pushing a bicycle hawking, once, in the house, listening to an aunt shouted: new ice-cream, hot. (Estimated that the aunt used to sell oil cakes and doughnuts)

51. My colleague argued with someone, anxious to open his mouth and came to the sentence, "You think I'm eating to grow up ah?" I always wondered what he grew up eating."

52. A KTV song, a MM shouted: give me a point a week cut stick "double Jay".

53. One day in the forest, the fox was smoking marijuana, when the bunny ran from a distance, saw all this, came over and said: fox fox, how can you smoke marijuana, it's not good for the body, see, the air is so fresh ah, come and I run with it. The fox thought it was right, so he ran with the bunny, running, they saw the elephant was smoking heroin, the bunny ran over to the elephant and said: elephant ah elephant, why are you doing drugs, see how fresh the air, run with me. The elephant thought it was a good idea, so he ran with the two of them. Running, saw the lion rolled up his sleeves, was about to inject heroin, the little rabbit far away from the lion shouted: lion ah lion, drug use is not good for the body ah, see how fresh the air, and I run with it ... ... Only to see the lion put down the syringe rushed over, the rabbit wildly flattened a meal, the elephant trembling to the lion said: Why do you hit the little rabbit ah, he did not want us to hurt the body how good ah! The lion said: since the rabbit ate ecstasy, he asked me to run with him every day!

54. In the summer, a giraffe met a rabbit, to whom she proudly showed off her neck: Ah, little rabbit, do you know how nice it is to have a long neck? Do you know how sweet and fresh the leaves are at the top of the trees? Do you know how it feels to drink water in summer? As the refreshing water slowly passed through her neck, the rabbit looked at her and simply said, "Have you tried throwing up yet?"

55.Once my brother beat me and hit me with a bag on my head. Then my brother had to pack something and didn't find a bag, so he took the bag on my head to hold something.

56.Once upon a time there was a marshmallow who went to play ball for a long time, and he said, "I'm so tired, I feel like my whole body has gone soft.

57. Once upon a time there were two snowmen, and one snowman said, I'm so cold, and the other said, I'm cold too, and the other said, Then let's both hug each other, and so they both hugged each other. And guess what happened? Then they died of cold.

58. Even when I was not honest, an old farmer in order to educate me, said to me: 60 years of suffering ah, no food, picking out the boogers never thrown

59. There is a tycoon looking for maids, the subject of the interview is the toilet, the first few on the end of the first few did not wash their hands on the way out, the tycoon so they sent them away, only one washed his hands, and so the tycoon stayed with him. But one day, the tycoon found that he came out without washing his hands, and the tycoon asked him why. The servant replied, "I brought hand towels today..."

60.A man saw a store having a big sale and walked in. "What are you buying?" "I'd like to buy dog food." "We have a rule that you must prove you have a dog." "Where is there such a rule?" "That's the way it is with reduced-price items." The man rubbed shoulders with the salesman for half a day, but the salesman still didn't agree to sell it to him There was no way out, so the man had to go home and bring his dog with him before he could buy the dog food. After a few days, the man went to the store again to buy cat food "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have a rule that you must prove you have cats." The same saleswoman was there, and the man dawdled with her for half a day, but he had to go home and bring his cat before he could buy the cat food. A few days later, the man came to the store holding a large cardboard box with a hole in it, and approached the saleswoman, "What can I get for you?" "You'll know if you stick your hand in." The salesman stuck his hand in, "What is it, sticky." "I'd like to buy two rolls of hand towels."

61.A man went to take his friend to visit his grandmother. While he was talking to his grandmother, his friend started eating the peanuts that were sitting on the coffee table, and finished them all. When they left, his friend said to his grandmother, "Thank you for the peanuts," and she responded, "Wow! Uh-huh! LOL! Ever since I lost all my teeth, all I can do is suck off the outer layer of chocolate. Getting old, ahem.

62. Someone loves the dish "Spicy Vermicelli Casserole". Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again. But the waiter told him that the dish was sold out. "Is it really sold out?" he asked, disappointed. "Sir, it's really sold out. You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table." The waiter replied. The man followed the waiter's pointing and saw a very decent gentleman sitting at the neighboring table. The gentleman had already eaten almost all of his meal, but the "Spicy Vermicelli Casserole" was still full. The man felt that the gentleman was wasting his food, so he walked up to the gentleman, pointed to the "Spicy Vermicelli Casserole" and asked politely, "Sir, do you want more?" The gentleman shook his head in a dignified manner. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and gobbled it up. The wind rolled up, a moment half of the stomach, suddenly he realized that in the bottom of the casserole lying a very small, very small, but the fur has grown full of mice. With a wave of nausea, the man spat all the vermicelli he had eaten back into the casserole. When he was there to turn his stomach, the gentleman with a very sympathetic look at him, said: "very disgusting is not it just now I also so ......"

63. This day, the hotel owner is making the rounds of the hall. Came a beggar went up and said, "Boss give a toothpick line?" The boss gave him a sent away. A moment later, another beggar also came to ask for toothpicks. Boss thought now this beggar how do not want to rice to change the toothpick? Also give him the same one sent away, did not pass much old, and came to a beggar. The boss said to him, "you are also to ask for toothpicks?" The beggar said: "there is a person vomited, but I was a step late, has been in front of the two beggars to eat all the food, now only the soup is left. Can you give me a straw?

64. The oldest, the oldest two take the airplane, the oldest airsickness, non-stop vomiting. A bag full of vomit, the boss had to go to get the bag, and when he came back, he found that the whole plane people are constantly vomiting. When he came back, he found that all the people on the plane were vomiting. The boss asked him why, and he said, "I saw that this bag was full, so I had to drink half of it, and then they all threw up."

65. A priest was playing golf and a nun was watching. The first shot was off, and the priest cursed, "Damn, it's off!" Another shot, and the priest curses again, "Damn, missed again!" The nun said, "God will punish you for swearing as a priest." As soon as the words left his mouth, a thunderbolt struck the nun dead. The priest wondered: why was I the one who cursed and why did it strike the nun dead? At this time only heard God's voice from the sky: "Damn, I missed too!"

66. The head coaches of the Chinese, Japanese and Korean soccer teams came to heaven together and asked God when their respective soccer teams would win the World Cup, and God said: Korea needs 50 years. The Korean coach cried out: I am not going to see it. God also said: Japan needs 100 years. The Japanese coach cried out: I won't be able to see it. The Chinese coach quickly asked: What about us? God cried out: I am not going to see it.

67. Three white rabbits picked a mushroom

The two big ones let the small ones go to get some wild vegetables to eat together

The small ones said, I don't want to go, I'm going to go, and you'll eat my mushrooms

The two big ones said, I won't. Don't worry about it, and so the little white rabbits went to eat it

Six months have passed and the little white rabbit has not come back, and one of the big ones said, "It won't come back. The other one said, "Wait a little longer. The other big one said wait a little longer ~ ~ ~ ~ a year has passed, the white rabbit has not come back, the two big discussion do not have to wait, we eat it. Just then, the little white rabbit jumps out of the jungle next to them and gets angry and says, "Look, I knew you were going to eat me. I knew you were going to eat my mushrooms

68. If we say a bear without a tail is called a bear without a tail, what do we call a bear without a penis? The answer is a female bear, because female bears don't have dicks in the first place.

69. In music class, the teacher played a piece by Beethoven

Small Ming asked Xiaohua, "Do you know music?"

Siao Hua: "Yes"

Siao Ming: "Then do you know what the teacher is playing?"

Siao Hua: "The piano."

70.Once upon a time a man was fishing and caught a squid.

The squid begged him, "Please let me go, don't roast me and eat me.

The man said, "Okay, then let me ask you a few questions.

The squid was happy and said, "Go ahead, take the test!

Then the man grilled the squid

71. Xiao Ming lost one leg in a car accident,

Small Ming lost another leg in a car accident

Another car accident and Xiao Ming lost his other leg

Another car accident and Xiao Ming lost another leg

It was in pain and it was screaming and screaming and screaming.

In fact, Ming was a dog

72. One day, a pile of black poop saw a pile of white poop,

and the black poop asked: Why are you so white and beautiful?

The white poop was very angry when he heard this!

He said, I'm not a poop! I'm ice cream!!!!

73. Once in the heat of the day to play mahjong, a sudden power outage, had to buy a candle to continue the fight. After half an hour, it is too hot to bear, one person said: "or turn on the electric fan, hot." Another person interface: "can not open, open will blow out the candle. Halo == "

74. University period, I a student just bought a cell phone, do the mobile card, call 1860 artificial desk inquiry, a moment of excitement: "Please ask your ground moving band business ......" from the speakerphone We actually heard the operator lady politely said: "Our ground moving with the business ......" the whole dormitory burst into laughter!

75. One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountains to pick fruit,

He announced: "Children, after picking fruit, we unified together to wash, wash can be eaten together."

All the children ran off to pick fruit.

When it was time to gather, all the children gathered.

The teacher: "Xiaohua, what did you pick?"

Small Hua:

"I'm washing apples because I picked apples."

Teacher:

"What about you, Xiaomei?"

Siu Mei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked them."

Teacher: "The children are great! What about you, Ah Ming?"

Ming: "I'm washing my shoes because I stepped in poop."

76. A mentally ill man screamed, "I'm the president and you all have to listen to me!

The attending physician asked him: who said that?

The patient: God said so.

Hearing this, a patient next to him suddenly jumped up: I never said that!

77. There was a family that was very lazy. Dad told mom to do housework, mom didn't want to do it, so she told her sister to do it, but her sister didn't want to do it, so she told the dog to do it. One day a guest came to the house and was surprised to find the dog doing housework. Asked the puppy said: puppy, you can do housework ah? Puppy said: no way, they do not do, are called me to do ah. The guest is even more surprised, you can talk!!!! Puppy: Shh! Keep your voice down or they will know I can talk and ask me to answer the phone again...!!!!

78. Lele went to the zoo one day to feed the monkeys...and threw peanuts to the monkeys to eat...but one of the monkeys would shove the peanuts up his butt first...and then take them out to eat...Lele felt disgusted and went to ask the director.... ...why that monkey acted so strangely... The headmaster explained that last year, a man threw a big peach to him... and the fruit of that big peach was not as big as the peanuts. As a result, the seeds of the peach could not be discharged smoothly from his buttocks...He was badly hurt...So now, he must shove the food into his buttocks to make sure that it can be discharged before he dares to eat it...

79. I'm not going to be able to save you!"

Princess: "Break your throat!"

No one: "Princess! I'm coming to save you!"

Demon King: "Hell no..."

Ghost: "Who found me?"

Who: "What's it to me?"

The Demon King is dead!

80.Once upon a time, there was a white cat and a black cat, one day, the white cat fell into the water , the black cat saved it, the white cat said something to the black cat

Please... What is this sentence? A: Meow ......

81.The white rabbit hopped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Ah, I'm so sorry, there aren't that many"

"That's so..." The white rabbit hung his head and walked away.

The next day, the white rabbit hopped to the bakery, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "I'm sorry, I don't think so."

"That's right." The white rabbit went away again, downcast.

On the third day, the white rabbit hopped to the bakery, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

The owner said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today!"

The white rabbit pulled out his money, "Great, I'll take two!"

82. Fire Department: where's the fire?

The caller: my house.

Fire Department: I am asking where?

The caller: in the kitchen.

FIRE DEPARTMENT: I mean how do we get there?

Alarmist: don't you have a fire truck?

83. The coffee cup and the water cup crossed the street together, and at this time, a grandpa yelled, "Be careful, it's a red light now." But after a while, the coffee cup successfully crossed the road, but the cup of water was hit by a truck into the water, may I ask why? Because coffee cups have ears and water cups do not.

84. Two tomatoes went shopping, the first tomato suddenly walked very fast, the second tomato asked, "Where are we going?" The first tomato didn't answer and the second tomato asked again. The first tomato still didn't answer, so the second tomato asked again. The first tomato finally turns his head slowly and says, "Aren't we tomatoes? Can we talk?

85. Xiao Ming and his classmates played heart to heart guessing "Andy Lau"

Small Ming shouted loudly: "It's one of the four heavenly kings!"

A classmate said confidently without hesitation: I know it's the Monkey King!"

86. The little penguin asked his grandmother one day, "Grandma, grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yes, of course you are a penguin." The little penguin then asked his dad, "Dad, dad, am I a penguin?" "Yes, you are a penguin. What's wrong?" "But, but why do I feel so cold?"

87.Three college students were kidnapped. The bad guys tied him to a pole and asked him: say, where are you from? If you don't tell me, I'll electrocute you! College student A: I'm from Jiaotong University, college student B: I'm from Peking University, and college student C: I'm from the Electricity University (Power University)! The result is electrocuted .... Chill~~~

88.Once upon a time there was a horse, into a bar, sat down at the bar to find the barman to ask for a glass of wine, the waiter said: your face is so long ah ......

89.Prisoners were executed by firing squad, due to the poor quality of bullets, the first shot did not ring, then fired a second shot. The third shot. At this point the prisoner cried, hugging the bailiff's thighs and said: big brother you strangle me! Too fucking scary .....

90.Three men, competing together in a marksmanship contest, with a black man holding something up as a target.

The first guy puts an apple on the black guy's head and then, from a distance of 10 meters, raises his hand and smashes the apple with a single shot, he blows the muzzle of the gun and says: I'm Zorro!

The second man put a cherry on the black man's head, then at a distance of 50 meters, raised his hand and with a single shot broke the cherry, he blew out his muzzle and said, I'm007

The third man put a sesame seed on the black man's head, then at a distance of 100 meters, raised his hand and with a single shot broke the black man's head, he also blew out his muzzle and said, I' m sorry

The third man put an apple on the black man's head, then at a distance of 100 meters, raised his hand and with a single shot broke the black man's head, he also blew out his muzzle and said, I' m sorry

91.Xiao Wang worked in the personnel department on the 10th floor, and a month ago, was transferred to the administrative department on the 9th floor ...... Today, Xiao Wang's classmates called the personnel department to find him: "Is Xiao Wang in?"

The colleague who answered the phone said, "Xiao Wang is no longer in personnel."

Small Wang students: "ah ah! , when the matter ah, how do I not know ah, have not had time to send him?"

" It's okay, you can go down there to find him"

92. Wife spent a huge amount of money to do plastic surgery, a few days later turned into a beautiful woman to go home! When she entered the door, she said to her husband, who looked puzzled, "What? Do not recognize me?" The husband froze for a moment, then said in surprise, "Come on in, my wife is not at home."

93. A woman walking at night, suddenly saw a man walking toward her with open arms, do embracing, went forward is a foot. The man fell to the ground and cried, said: are the third block, I invited who has pissed off who, with a piece of glass home is so difficult?

94. This afternoon and a group of female coworkers chat, suddenly someone said I am not a man , I was on fire, I said, you say I'm not, I pulled out to show you , the girls laughed, one of the most cattle, said, you pull out ah I pulled out the ID card.

95. A little boy went to the countryside to spend the holidays with his relatives. The relatives lived in a farmhouse, and the boy played and saw many things he had never seen before. When he returned home, he told his mother everything. He said that the one thing that impressed him was a sow with her piglets.

What did the sow do? The child said, "The piglets chased the sow then they turned her over and started ripping the buttons off her belly."

96. mom: "Son, son! Come on! 'It is too easy!' What is it?"

Son: "'It is too easy'."

Mom: "Easy or not?"

Son: "Ah just 'it's too simple' yeah!"

Mom: "You don't think I'm going to hit you do you?"

After the words, she taught her son a lesson.

Then the mom asked,

"What is the meaning of the word 'what'?"

Son: "'What'."

Mom: "I said, 'what' means?"

Son: "'What'!"

After that, the mother taught her son another lesson ......

After the punishment, the mother asked again:

"OK, ask you again, be good and tell mom and it will be fine."

Son: "Uhm U_U~."

Mom: "What do you often hear people say 'fuck' for?"

Son: "(Woo)..."

97.The ronin said, "People call me a ronin, it's nice!"

The samurai said, "People call me the martial artist, and that's nice too!"

The master said, "People call me the High Man, and that's nice too!"

The swordsman said: "You guys talk, I'll go first

98. The students of Teachers' College said: I'm from "Teachers' College"

The students of Railway College said: I'm from "Railway College"<

Vocational College student says: I am from "Vocational College"

Technical College student says: You guys talk, I'll go first!

99. The white jade said: My name is White Jade.

The turquoise jade says: My name is Jasper.

The red jade says: My name is red jade.

The apricot-colored jade said: You guys talk, I'll go first

100.Zhang Liangying said: "The fans who worship me say: my idol is called Ying"

He Jie said: "The fans who worship me say: my idol is called Jie."

Zhou Pen-chang said, "My idol is called Chang."

Li Yuchun said, "You guys talk, I'll go first."

101. The main character of the song. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty. ~I sang a song for my uncle's birthday ==". The crowd was in an uproar. I looked back at the screen and saw "Prayer".