on my first day back in Beijing, I went to the mall to watch a movie and went shopping, bought myself a new dress, and finally added something new to myself after nearly half a year. I was super happy. This half year can be said to have gone through a very painful period, often suffering, anxiety, anxiety and collapse. Although I know clearly in the experience that such days will definitely pass, although I know that anxiety is useless, and although I know that I should pay more attention to my own growth, there should be no less pain, which is why I can't do it well. A lot of things, you don't know what is going on until you have experienced, felt and suffered, which also makes me have more understanding and tolerance for others, and I won't judge others' lives at will from my own perspective.
After going through this period of struggle, I found that my mood was really different during that period. You don't know what poverty is until you are poor, and you don't know what it's like to starve until you are hungry.
At one time, the pressure of no mortgage was maintained at the level of consumption and savings of 1w+ per month. After that, I was burdened with mortgage and debt, and my financial resources were cut off for a period of time. The most intuitive impact was the decline of living standards. Of course, eating and drinking was definitely no problem, and the fact that I couldn't buy anything was enough to make me die of pain.
Although I haven't lived a rich material life, at least I want to buy things for myself, such as clothes, cosmetics, travel, investment in my study and so on. Later, I lived in poverty. I was poor for a long time. I knew what it was like to be poor. I would count my days if I wanted to buy a book, but I also found a way to make myself happy without money. It's not a pleasure in suffering, but at least I won't be unhappy every day.
making yourself happy is a very important ability. I will take selfies every day; Drink coffee; Go to the park; Reading; Exercise; Watching movies; Start to be more literate … gradually find ways to make yourself happy without spending money or with little money. When you start to make yourself happy, everything will be right; When you are unhappy, nothing can make you happy.
now think about it, it will be painful for everyone, the living standard will plummet, and the material life can't be guaranteed. Who can stand it? So, it's really great that I can persist for so long and find a way to reconcile with myself. I can especially understand my own difficulties. Melancholy and anxiety really can't solve the problem. The result of anxiety can only be anxiety, which can't make things better. When we put down our judgment, our obsession, our impatience and the result, everything will get better gradually.
sometimes, I often wonder whether we want too much or have too little. Compared with myself who just graduated, I now have more things, a house and a car, a lot of clothes and cosmetics, walked more roads, ate more delicious food and bought a lot of things that I longed for when I first came to Beijing, but why am I more anxious and uneasy than then? Because I want to have more, I want to pursue more, and I am afraid that everything I have will collapse.
Yes, people's material desires will increase with age and different stages of life. Many times, people suffer not because they have too little, but because they want too much. With cars, houses and money, you will want a better car, a bigger house and more money. In reality, the value judgment of society judges others by "what you have" rather than "what kind of person you are". Therefore, more people are tirelessly pursuing material things, and it is more likely to cause anxiety when material desires are not satisfied.
Recently, I'm still chasing power. After four strokes, I have a different understanding of many characters. Varis is my favorite character and a real wise man in the whole drama. He came from a humble background, got up from the bottom, suffered too many hardships, and climbed to his present position. He clearly knew his role, what advantages and disadvantages he had, what he could and could not do, and he was very proper limit. He could distinguish right from wrong, and he had a conscience in justice, but he would not be as honest and loyal as ned. He knew how to protect himself and would not be loyal to a certain family. He was a person who could jump out of the current system and really understand the overall situation.
many people can't figure him out. Every time they are asked, What do you want? His answer is always: peace. I believe this is the answer from his heart, the ultimate love and kindness. Many people in the play commented on him. A person who has no desire is terrible. What can you do without women, power and money? The wall stands a thousand miles, and if you have no desire, you are just. So, he can survive in blood shed.
The ultimate meaning in the world: love, truth and happiness. Most of our pains are actually caused by desires. We want more money, success, power, status and influence ... When we can't get rid of the current predicament, look up and your perspective will definitely change.
In fact, happiness is very simple. If you want less, you will be happier if you take things as they are. "Live in the moment", a simple four words, tells the philosophy of life. It is a detached mentality, which is easier said than done. This requires us to practice all the time, reminding ourselves to keep mindfulness. Isn't it the most important thing to be happy when people are alive?