Collection of humorous greetings Are you still troubled by not finding funny greetings?

Below is a collection of humorous greetings that I have collected for your reference. I hope it can help friends in need!

1. Journey to the West tells us that loyalty kills people.

The monsters are too loyal. When they catch Tang Monk, they always have to wait for their brothers and sisters to come and eat together. As a result, time is wasted, things are not done, and they cause a lot of trouble.

2. Do you know how the sky is blue?

That's what I painted; do you know where the money came from?

That's what I printed; do you know how cows fly?

That's what I said; do you know how pigs die?

The text messages are so annoying!

3. It has infinite magical power and can make the evil turn good, the weak turn strong, and the strong turn weak. Guess what it is?

Most people answer: the devil.

Correct answer: love.

——Everyone has forgotten the essence of love.

4. Looking at you, thinking about you, missing you, hurting you, dreaming about you, holding you, keeping you, getting rid of you, my poor tooth, what do you want me to do with you.

5. If memory can also be lost, then how can I remember you? Your meaning in my life should not be criticized by the mortal world. Only by facing your affection bravely can I get the real sweetness.

I must eat your baked sweet potatoes today.

6. Although rabbits don’t eat grass beside their nests, old cows like to eat young grass, good horses don’t eat grass that turns back, and there is no grass anywhere in the world, but my dear, for your health, for your happiness, for your future, for you.

Life, you'd better eat this grass, my little lamb!

7. IQ test questions: When you receive this message, please press it with your gentle hands and look carefully with your passionate eyes. You will find that the message contains warm friendship and warmth, greetings and blessings, and so on.

Didn't find any, sorry!

Prove that you are a fool!

8. Throw your phone after receiving a message, and you will be very angry if you press it again. Don’t blame me for reminding you. If you press it again, you are too insistent and advise you not to listen and read it. Keep pressing the message to the end. In fact, I am looking for fools. No.

Hit the wall and never look back.

Hey, I found another one.

9. I heard that you bought an earthen jar. It is said to be from the Zhou Dynasty. Experts will come to identify it.

You ask: Is it from the Western Zhou Dynasty?

The expert shook his head.

He asked again: Is it from the Eastern Zhou Dynasty?

The expert shook his head again.

Ask again: Is it from the Zhou Dynasty or above?

Expert answer: Last week!

10. It’s the weekend, and I solemnly tell you: Go to bed when you are sleepy, lean on the sofa when you are tired, smile when you are happy, and forget your worries. Ask me for guidance when you are depressed. Treat me to sweet cakes when you miss me. If you don’t reply to the message,

, I tripped over ants when I went out!

11. Dear, if you don't contact me again, and you don't apologize to me and admit your mistake, then I will ship the goods!

I’m going to send Sister Feng’s package to you. Don’t worry, it’s free of charge and non-refundable!

Remember to check on time, I am sending express mail, it will be very fast!

Enjoy!

Well, let’s see if you dare not contact me in the future!

12. My friend, you deceived me, you know, it deeply hurt my weak heart. You bullied such a good person like me, why are you so bad?

Don't you know what's going on?

Think about it, think about it again!

Oops, you really have such a bad memory!

You said you would contact me, but why haven't you contacted me yet?

Text me back quickly!

13. A businessman and a soldier rented a house together.

One day, two people were in a hurry to go to the toilet, but there was only one toilet.

The soldier said: It doesn't matter, I am a soldier, you should use it first!

But let's make a rule: you must come out on the count of three.

The businessman used it first, and when he counted to three, he came out and said to the soldier: You have to hurry up, come out and replace me!

After the soldiers entered, they heard: One, two, one.

.

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14. Life is like a pancake, you have to turn it enough times to mature; being drunk is not the fault of the wine, but the high degree of emotion; when the book is used, there will be less regret, and when the meat is used to lose weight, it will be too much; after Steve Jobs died, our Forbes ranking rose one place

!

15. Youth is gone forever, I wish it a happy journey; Sun Wukong is fickle, so he is destined to be single; an otaku will never understand the feeling of homesickness; A good person should be like Steve Jobs: swipe my card when he is alive, and swipe my card after he is dead.

Screen!

16. Difficulties are not problems, and distance is not distance. Friends should learn from each other's strengths and cherish each other.

Money only needs to be earned through hard work, and being willing to help people tests one's willpower. My shortcoming is that money is a little tight, so you can figure it out!

17. Your advantages are innumerable. You dance on cow dung, you perform bewitching in front of others, you cross high mountains and dangers, you are not willing to humiliate yourself, you press on your back, your butt can still pop, and you are not afraid of the stench.

, can smell and cover.

The nickname given by others: spanker!

18. You have extraordinary bearing, reveal sexy curves, and are steadfast in the wind and rain. Not everyone can do it.

You have been assaulted on the chest and touched on the face, and you have experienced this, but you have never complained.

To be honest, sculpture, you are really beautiful!

19. The long night is so difficult, as if it is flying to your side.