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True emotional intelligence is on the tip of the tongue. How do words influence people's emotional intelligence?

Many people must have watched "A Bite of China". This food documentary has greatly stimulated people's taste buds. However, the tongue does more than just that. There is a Chinese saying: Diseases enter from the mouth, and disasters come from the mouth. The level of emotional intelligence is not only reflected in behavior and thoughts, but the language spoken by the tongue can also reflect a person's emotional intelligence. In other words, even the words on the tip of the tongue are also a manifestation of emotional intelligence. So, how to teach children that speaking is a sign of high emotional intelligence?

True emotional intelligence is on the tip of the tongue. When speaking, you should pay attention to six situations:

If others are right or wrong, keep your mouth shut

There are always people who have right and wrong behind them. Talks about other people behind their backs. However, this behavior is not ethical or polite. The rights and wrongs of others do not affect you. Arranging other people's rights and wrongs in this way will make others feel disgusted. You must know that everyone has difficulties, and who can know the hardships of others. Making wild guesses is meaningless and will reduce your popularity, which is not cost-effective. Parents should teach their children not to gossip in front of others and act like gossips. Don't get involved when others are talking. Sometimes silence is a noble act. Even if you see it with your own eyes, maybe the truth of life is not like this. A kind word can warm you in the winter, but a bad word can hurt someone in the cold months. Why not be a sober bystander, and it is better not to say anything about other people's rights and wrongs.

If your words are unreasonable, it is better not to say them

"Tong Meng Xun" said: "It is better to say nothing than to say something unreasonable. One word is unreasonable, and a thousand words are useless.". The meaning of this sentence is: If you fail to say one sentence, it will be useless no matter how much you say. The more you say, the worse the effect will be. Many people always talk a lot in life, but these words are all nonsense and have no practical meaning. There will always be people who want to express their presence by speaking, but the more they do this, the more people will ignore this person, because everyone will think that this person is unreliable and unable to do practical things. Parents should teach their children not to talk nonsense. Sometimes silence is golden. After all, one useful word is more meaningful than ten useless words.

It is better not to say anything when it is difficult to argue, and face it bravely with your own heart

Misunderstandings and prejudices are everywhere at all times. Don’t let other people’s words affect your principles. . Parents should educate their children not to forget their original intentions and to bravely face all kinds of unkind looks. If you can't explain it, don't explain it. Facts will prove who is right and who is wrong. The famous French impressionist painter Gauguin was such a person. He gave up his career and went to Paris to study painting. He also went to Tahiti in the South Pacific, abandoned civilized life, and took the local indigenous people as wives. He lived in a miasma-ridden little town. Dao Liao's behavior in spending the rest of his life caused many people to misunderstand, ridicule, and dismiss him; however, he finally wrote his glorious life with a brush and injected all the value of life into the gorgeous canvas. Gauguin's greatness does not lie in how many worldly enjoyments and curtains he was able to abandon, but in the fact that he still did not change his original intention in the face of criticism from others. Parents have all encountered one or two things that are hard to explain. It seems absurd, ridiculous, and painful, but it is actually a process of spiritual practice. In this world, tolerance is more important than justification. Instead of defending yourself, it is better to laugh it off. . Parents not only do this themselves, but also ask their children to do this.

It is better to speak quickly than to say nothing

There will always be people who clearly have no ability but insist on speaking quickly. Parents should teach their children to assess the situation and not be quick to speak. A quick tongue can be extremely annoying, and it is better not to speak than to be disliked. It is a kind of education to shut up yourself, but it is a shame for others to shut you up. Don't wait until someone tells you "shut up" before you regret how inappropriate your words are. If you only want to be the fastest for the moment, but push yourself to the edge of vulgarity, then it is not a good thing. . There is such a scene in "Ode to Joy", where five beauties are trapped in an elevator and the situation is not optimistic. However, Qiu Yingying talked about all kinds of horrible things at this time. Although she was addicted to talking, she did not notice the people around her. Extremely uncomfortable, Qu Xiaoxiao finally angrily told Qiu Yingying to "shut up." I hope all parents will educate their children carefully and don’t learn from Qiu Yingying.

It is better not to mention old things again than to say them

Everyone will have things they regret, but there is no point in dwelling on the past. Parents should teach their children not to bring up old things again. Some things are worth remembering, but some things need to be forgotten, because the past cannot be restarted. Everyone knows that Mr. Jin Yong likes Xia Meng. In order to pursue the lover of his dreams, he changed his name to Lin Huan and came to Great Wall Pictures to work as an editor. He also customized the script "The Beauty" for Xia Meng. Many years later, when a reporter mentioned Jin Yong's admiration for her to Xia Meng, Xia Meng only responded with one sentence: "Jin Yong and I would rather not talk about it." Yes, the past is like running water and has no meaning. Why not let everything disperse with the wind, as long as you know it in your heart.

If you say something but don’t do it, it’s better to shut up

People often say words such as: keep your word, keep your word, and keep your word to describe integrity. However, not everyone means what they say. OK. If parents want their children to have good emotional intelligence, the issue of integrity is very important. Those who often make promises, please be careful, because smart people will not make promises casually. When you make a promise, you are full of enthusiasm, but when you really want to fulfill it, you find that there is nothing you can do. If you can't do it, don't say anything. If you say it, you must do it, because this is a reflection of a person's personality.

The famous writer Ye Zi once encountered this kind of thing. At a college class reunion, many people said that they would help another classmate when he was in danger. Only Ye Zi himself felt that his ability was limited and did not speak up. Later, when a classmate was in trouble and needed money, everyone declined the offer. Only Ye Zi himself lent him 20,000 yuan. It can be seen that the beauty of language is not as pale as the reality. Let your children keep their word by doing more and speaking less, and they will like you more in the future.