Text/A Record of Mother Moss's Parenting

When mothers get together, the most common topics to talk about are "spitting husband" and "anxious children". If there is anything else, it is the happiness or unhappiness that comes with it. There are women who feel happy, but they talk more about disturbing things.

In the past few days, mothers also got together with their holiday babies. Coincidentally, all of them are stay-at-home mothers. The gathering of a group of middle-aged women is a spit meeting, which is mixed with too many disappointments in life.

Xiaomi's mother (a pseudonym) said, "Since I became a mother, I don't know what happiness is, just like Gu Jia's feeling in Thirty. Gu Jia is dead, and what survived is Xu Ziyan's mother. " After giving birth to a child, Xiaomi's mother resigned from the top 5 enterprises and stayed at home as a full-time mother. A few years later, there was another treasure, and in a flash, 1 years passed.

Before giving birth, my career was smooth and smooth, and I often used my spare time to learn some hobbies such as floral art and cooking. At that time, my husband was gentle and considerate, and his life was full of flavor.

After having children, Mama Xiaomi, who has always had a high demand for quality of life, started the process of hard exploration of various parenting methods. Since then, life time and space have been squeezed on a large scale, and problems have emerged one after another. When children are young, I envy those daughters who can still dress beautifully and go shopping and partying. I can only coax children at home all year round. Often the child is in his arms, but his mind is blank.

I finally hoped that my children would go to school. I thought I would have personal space. Unexpectedly, the overwhelming homework and tutoring made her anxious. Be a housewife during the day and a part-time teacher in all subjects at night. After a few years, children don't know how much they learn, but they know everything about piano, dance and robot programming.

Xiaomi's mother said that she once discussed happiness with her husband. My husband said without hesitation, "I am happy!" "Millet mom felt unhappy at all. Husband super-rationally helped her analyze: "You just want to be nice to your children too much, but often feel that you can't achieve the desired results, and then you start to question yourself." Xiaomi's mother asked again, "Then why do you feel happy?" The husband said, "There are too many reasons. I feel very happy when I come back from overtime and you give me a hot meal. I also feel very happy when I watch my daughter sleeping ... "

Xiaomi's mother said that her husband's happiness is really low, and it's really a fool who has a blessing.

Xiao Wenma (pseudonym) and her husband are college classmates and both graduate students of famous universities. After graduation, they worked hard together from scratch and settled down in the city. With the birth of two children, Xiaowenma is also faced with the choice between work and family. In the end, she decided to give up her job and become a full-time mother. Different from Xiaomi's mother, Xiaowen's resignation to take care of her children at home has become the knot of the elderly on both sides of the family.

Husband's parents are worried that their son is under too much pressure to support his family alone. Their parents think that their daughter will be a housewife in the end because of her graduate education and such a high degree, depending on her husband's face. Mom, in particular, sends her some articles from time to time, which generally means that housewives who have no jobs suffer from emotional crisis and are out of touch with society. Once the family changes, it becomes nothing.

Parents' knot has naturally become Xiaowen's knot.

Although my husband understands it very well, he thinks it is a special division of labor in a special period. But every time I go back to my hometown, my relatives and friends ask, "What are you doing now? How much do you earn a month? " She'll feel bad. Back in those days, I was regarded as the favored son of heaven by everyone, and many students who were not as good as myself have achieved great success now, so there will inevitably be a gap in their hearts.

Xiao Lang Ma (a pseudonym) is a very gentle woman, a typical wife and mother. My husband's business is doing well, and my daughter is cute. It seems that there is nothing unsatisfactory in life. But when it comes to her husband, she looks helpless.

Xiao Lang's dad, a science and technology man, started his own business. He is in charge of a company with hundreds of people, and he is resolute and meticulous in his work. Proper overbearing president fan er. Do you think overbearing presidents are "pampering their wives to excess"? That's wrong. According to personality reasoning, most cases will be "controlling your wife has a skill."

Xiao Lang's mother complained, "My baby dad is one of those people who doesn't take care of the employees in the company enough, and he has to arrange me clearly every day. I have to take care of what food I cook. I take my daughter to practice the piano, and he doesn't know anything and has to ask. Even if it rains and you want to close the window, you have to call back and tell me. "

We jokingly said, "What a wonderful husband you are. These people care about their families and you."

Xiao Lang's mother said, "This is not caring, this is caring. This morning, I nagged for 1 minutes about how to wash clothes. I said it's not easy to dry clothes in rainy days, so I'll save them for a few days before washing them. He insists on washing clothes every two or three days, even bath towels every few days. Who wants to be scolded as soon as they get up? Whether I get angry or not, I end up unhappy all day. "

During our chat, Xiao Lang's father was the only Bao Dad who called twice. The first call asked where to put things, and the second call asked when to go home. There is no sweet talk, but it seems that you can feel a man's sense of dependence through the phone.

Rong Rongma (a pseudonym) is a young woman in literature. Although a science student, I like reading novels very much. Classic literature and online literature are all-inclusive. Compared with many treasure moms who are keen on drama, she is definitely a clean stream. Because she said reading books, she could see more psychological details, more stories, and more hearty words ... These TV dramas could not be passed on.

Two years ago, she joined the ranks of stay-at-home mothers. With years of literary skills, Rong Rongma simply wrote novels herself. When her two sons go to school during the day, she reads books and codes at home. In the evening, when her son is out of school, she is busy cooking and tutoring the children. The days are also arranged in an orderly way.

but after a long time, my husband refused. I thought that my wife would resign and go home, and life would be easier. I didn't expect my wife to be busier than going to work. Especially in the evening, tutoring two children's homework is exhausting. If you have time, you have to supervise your children to practice the piano and take them to read. When the children are all asleep, Rongrongma often stays up late to code words in order to catch up with work.

Rongrong's father wanted to buy a car, and he waited for Rongrong's mother to accompany him to have a look. As a result, half a year passed and he didn't get around to it. During the National Day holiday, Rongrong's father wanted to go out to play. As soon as mother Rong Rong saw that it was raining for many days in Hunan Province, her son immediately had another competition in November, so she simply stayed at home. I forced my husband to say plaintively, "I don't think you love me now." Every day, except for my son, I live with your novels. "

Rong Rong's mother expressed great confusion: "I don't want you to eat and drink every day. A big man competes with his son and these virtual characters every day. It's really puzzling. "RongRongMa said, in fact, she is not free to accompany her husband to see the car, but she thinks it is good for men to make up their minds. I can't even drive a car. How can I know which car is good?

whether it is a "straight" husband or a "warm" husband, when they come to their wives, their perfection is discounted. Whether it is a child with a flamboyant personality or a child with an introverted nature, when he comes to his mother, he is a child to be improved.

it's easy to understand that the mother is anxious because the child doesn't study well. But I later learned that Xueba's mother was more anxious, because the heights were too cold to be cold, and she was worried that her children would fall off the altar all day long.

Life always seems like a chicken feather, and it can't be satisfactory. But it doesn't seem so bad to savor these trivial things in life. Looking at it from another angle, it's all small fortunate things that have never been noticed in life. In the eyes of others, you are such a happy person.

Although Xiaomi's mother is tired of complicated housework, having a reasonable and considerate husband beside her can save a lot of troubles and lead a transparent life.

Xiao Wenma graduated from a prestigious school, so let's not talk about the gene. Just talking about tutoring the baby to learn, whether it is spelling time or spelling ability, will kill a lot of mothers and envy a lot of working mothers.

it's actually a kind of happiness that Xiao Lang's mother is recited. Compared with those dads who often stay away from home, ignore trivial matters at home and never turn over their children's textbooks, Xiao Lang's dad is definitely the best man.

Rong Rong's mother found treasure in the eyes of many mothers. Competing for favor, that's a sign that a woman is highly respected!

With the liberalization of the second child policy, many families have two children. At the same time, however, the aging of the population has intensified, and the labor costs such as nannies have become higher and higher, forcing more and more women to leave the workplace and return to their families. According to a survey data, among the young mothers born after 1995, the proportion of full-time mothers is as high as 82%. Referring to the current situation in developed countries, stay-at-home mothers will not become the mainstream among Chinese mothers.

Some people say that a mother's mood is a barometer of a family. If mom is unhappy, the atmosphere of the whole family will be very tense. The mother's happiness is full, and the child will live healthier and happier. Therefore, how to make full-time mothers live a sense of value and happiness is really worth discussing.

sometimes because we are busy, we often ignore what we already have in life. We always hang high the responsibilities entrusted to us by life, and demand ourselves, children and partners with various established standards. We feel nervous and anxious because of this. But in fact, slow down or even stop, and think more about life and be tolerant, so that we can find the little blessings that are constantly emerging in life.

when you find that there are always endless things to do in raising children, maybe you can let go and let them grow up at their own pace. Too hard, or haste makes waste; When we are worried that being a stay-at-home mother will lose ourselves, then leave some independent space for ourselves and do something we like, and life will continue as usual; When we complain about how our husband doesn't give strength, we might as well think about other "pig teammates", and our mentality may be much calmer immediately.

There are still many stay-at-home mothers who are worried about being out of touch with society, so develop some specialties to refresh their sense of existence. Just like my mother, who is good at cooking, sells cakes and western cakes in the community; A mother who can play the piano and draw pictures will do training for children at home; There are also writing and parenting, and there are also many full-time mothers from the media.

In short, it is really important to be happy.