What do you say if two cows meet Meng Po at Naihe Bridge after their death and give you Meng Po Tang?

Grandma, my leg! It's fucking watered again ! ! My father suddenly said to me, I have more money than Li Ka-shing. What would you say?

It is time to take the medicine. When does the clock ring 13?

When it's bad, someone throws oil all over you and tells you, don't worry, it's all automatic. What do you do?

Hit him with kidney deficiency and tell him not to worry. There are also Liuwei Dihuang pills, which are used to treat kidney deficiency and contain no sugar. Please use one or two words, or two groups of words?

An idiot, a woman who has been divorced fifty times, how should I describe it? (an idiom)

What will happen if Kirin flies to the South Pole?

When do you think men are most attractive?

It's the most charming when you shit! Beat you to death! 10 One of your good-looking friends of the opposite sex called you in the middle of the night and wanted to go out with you to get a room. What should you do?

Fuck off! Lao Tzu is a serious man! Don't fucking seduce me! -Where to? Liu Xiang: China speed! Yao Ming, the height of China! You! China?

Weight. 12 Now! Right now! Don't think about it! Say an English word that begins with p.

Pigou! ! ! 13 I was drunk and suddenly grabbed your hand and told you that I like you for a long time. What should you do?

Sorry, I married your daughter. 14 Your enemy can't go to the toilet without paper. What should you do?

Give him a roll of cellophane 15. Do you think you look good in person or in photos?

Turn off the lights and look good. 16 suddenly someone asks you, what do you think of Virgo?

Man, slap you! Woman, come to my bed and tell you quietly! ! ! 17 Seriously, did you have plastic surgery?

My stomach is bulging. 18 Now 100 meters, can I enter 13 seconds?

Free fall? What are the similarities between Wei Xiaobao and Snow White?

Everyone likes the p 20 seaside. There is a turtle that can't turn over. Would you?

Pick it up and go home to make soup. 2 1 What line do orangutans hate most?

Parallel lines ... parallel lines don't intersect (banana) ~~ 22 What do you do if you don't want to be seen when you want to cry?

Cover other people's eyes with your hands. If your other half's predecessor died and your other half cried in front of you, how would you react?

Throw three feet of white silk and say, you might as well go with her If you have to expose half of your body, do you expose your left or right side?

Countdown to 25 jasmine, rose, rose, which is the least powerful?

Jasmine ...' What a beautiful (powerless) jasmine '~ 26 What color are the teeth of black and white babies?

The baby has no teeth yet. If you had to choose one of (1 Chris Lee, 2 Sister Furong, 3 Flowers, 4 Lv Xiulian) and get married immediately, what would you choose?

Choose death 28. What's your favorite pet?

What would you do if your opponent fell into the water?

Pee. What would you do if you saw a MM crying by the river?

I'll secretly push her down. 3 1 If one day you suddenly disappear, do you think someone will look for you crazily?

If I still owe the bank mortgage and car loan, what will you think when you fall asleep on the bus and wake up?

Ah. Am I still alive? (Because I'm a driver) 33 You were watching TV when Sadako climbed out, didn't you?

1 find a cage to raise. Learning 2, bring him the bench and shoot it back! What kind of wheel can only turn but not walk?

The wheels of the windmill are 35 pairs of twins. My brother's name is Tianlong. What's my brother's name?

Is there anyone who makes you feel sour when you think about it?

Yes, the one who bought candied haws. What do you think your style is, love at first sight, love at third sight or love for a long time?

Cold-blooded, or a night of passion! What is the last thing you want to do when sleeping in a warm bed at night?

Wet the bed! 39 Simple question ~ Who was the army of the Five Tigers of Shu during the Three Kingdoms period ~ I searched pigs online ~

Saint seiya, Zilong, Glacier, Instant and Ikki, 40 people who love each other, how can they keep their love for each other?

Kill each other and bury them in one place. 4 1 How can a man say one thing and do another?

You will wear a condom at a critical moment. I met a robber in the middle of the night, and he said he wouldn't let you go unless he sang. What can you sing?

Hao Hansong, when did your first kiss happen?

When I was 6 years old, I said to a girl one year younger than me: I don't agree that I pushed you into the ditch. If you are in prison, what do you do to kill time in prison?

Digging a tunnel 45 Your ex got married. Would you like to attend her wedding?

I just want to go to the fucking funeral! 46 13 children are divided into 9 oranges. How to divide it fairly?

Strangle four! 47 have family rules and state-owned regulations. What are the rules of the zoo?

Turtle 48 pencil. What?

Xiao (surname) ... (Xiao) Sharpening pencils ~~ 49 Sparrows are noisy. How to make it quiet?

Press it ... crow (press) sparrow silence ~~~ 50 What's the most valuable thing you stole while playing Xin Kai?

Rats in Internet cafes ... 5 1 (1-9) Which number is the most diligent? Which is the laziest?

Answer: 1 Laziest, 2 most diligent ... What's the name of the painter's apprentice?

When is lewd 53 1+2 not equal to 3?

When the calculation is wrong, do men who smoke smell or men who drink smell?

And those who don't take a shower. What is the minimum standard for making friends with you?

Must be human. 56 couplets: find a job and find a good job. Find a husband. Find a good husband?

Dream on. Have you ever peeped into other people's privacy?

I openly robbed. 58 rubber, tiger skin and watermelon skin, which is the worst?

Eraser ... Eraser (poor) ~~ 59 uses two groups of words?

Someone told you that I use mineral water to flush the toilet. How do you respond?

What I peed in was a royal salute! 6 1 What is cloth afraid of, and what is paper afraid of?

Not (cloth) afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) afraid of one thousand ~~ 62 Have you ever thought of suicide?

I want to fucking kill you! What is the thing that bothers you every day?

Constipation. Freckles, high myopia, pie face, elephant legs, thick waist, let you choose one as your wife, which one would you choose?

I will choose a man. How did you get the most unforgettable scar?

When I was born, that cruel doctor cut me 66 times! I stand in front of you and look at you affectionately, and you will. . ?

If your lover who has been in love for many years meets someone better than you and then leaves you, what does this prove?

Love is actually fucking ape shit! ! ! My girlfriend ate 50 kebabs in one breath, and my boyfriend said five words. What five words did she say?

How often do you take a bath in winter? In winter, take a bath

Both girls like you, one is beautiful and talented, and the other is gentle and housekeeping. Which one do you choose?

What do you think of 7 1 leaving home, going to Starbucks alone and sitting with a notebook all afternoon?

It's better than sitting in Yonghe soybean milk with a notebook. What is the most serious consequence of being naughty after 72 hours?

Playing on a wall when I was a child ~ I accidentally slipped and kicked people off the wall. If your high school classmate was sitting in a KTV, you happened to meet her, would you?

I'll point her out. A person is walking on the road, and a member of the opposite sex comes to ask you: Is this the earth? What's your answer?

If it is a beauty, I will say: I love you. If Martians were dinosaurs, I would say: Where are you from? Go back to where? The strangest name of Beijing snacks shows the state of an animal, which is sold in many places in Beijing! guess

(Answer: Rolling on a donkey) Peacock Green 76 Which country has the largest army, China, Japan or the United States?

Japan ... Japan has a singer named Ayumi Hamasaki (soldier quick march) ~~~ 77. Is anyone chasing you now?

Yes, I owe her 30 yuan. 78. Do you think about the opposite sex every day ~

I want to sleep with her every day. What parts of your body have been praised?

Nails, aunt Zhao, the janitor when I was a child, always praised me. Yo, this kid's nails really look like Andy Lau's! ! ! Have you ever thought about someone who makes you want to cry?

Yes, creditors. 8 1 Now, take your eyes off the computer screen and look to the right. Tell me what you see.

My dad's slap, * * * What time is it? Don't sleep! ! ! I am very good and obedient. I know you have a boyfriend/girlfriend now, but I will wait for you. Would you want me?

You'll die, son. Go home. Who should be beaten the most in history?

Su Wu ... Su Wu shepherd Beihai (kicked by the sea) ~~ 84 Someone has a secret crush on you. Will you be tempted to know?

I think I'll change my mind. What is the one thing you learned the most from Lei Feng?

Holding the eldest sister-in-law to send the children home. 86. How can I express my love for a person in order to win my heart? Spend money like water.

Why do you say that women wearing high heels mean getting married?

Because you walk slowly in high heels, it is easy for men to catch up with 88 and give up on someone. What is the most effective way to forget?

Research Altman 89 Chu Chu's birthday is March 30th. What year is this year?

On March 30th every year, 90 ICAC is the Independent Commission Against Corruption. What is ICBC?

(Answer: Industrial and Commercial Bank of China) 90 classic funny questions and answers of the Independent Commission Against Corruption _ The answer is beyond your imagination.

1 A bull and a cow, guess three words?

two (heads of) cattle

What would you say if you met Meng Po at Naiheqiao after your death and gave you Meng Po Tang?

Grandma, my leg! It's fucking watered again ! !

My father suddenly said to me, I have more money than Li Ka-shing. What would you say?

The take medicine

When does the clock ring 13?

depressed

Someone throws oil all over you and tells you, don't worry, it's all automatic. What do you do?

Hit him with kidney deficiency and tell him not to worry. There are also Liuwei Dihuang pills, which are used to treat kidney deficiency and contain no sugar.

Please use one or two words, or two groups of words?

An idiot.

How should a woman who has been divorced fifty times describe her? (an idiom)

Abandon all previous responsibilities.

What will happen when Kirin flies to the South Pole?

Ice cream (ice unicorn) ~ ~ ~

When do you think men are most attractive?

It's the most charming when you shit!

Beat you to death!

10 One of your good-looking friends of the opposite sex called you in the middle of the night and wanted to go out with you to get a room. What should you do?

Fuck off! Lao Tzu is a serious man! Don't fucking seduce me!

-Where to?

Liu Xiang: China speed! Yao Ming, the height of China! You! China?

Weight.

12 Now! Right now! Don't think about it! Say an English word that begins with p.

Pigou! ! !

13 I was drunk and suddenly grabbed your hand and told you that I like you for a long time. What should you do?

Sorry, I married your daughter.

14 Your enemy can't go to the toilet without paper. What should you do?

Give him a roll of scotch tape.

15 Do you think you look good in person or in a photo?

Turn off the lights and look good.

16 suddenly someone asks you, what do you think of Virgo?

Man, slap you! Woman, come to my bed and tell you quietly! ! !

17 Seriously, did you have plastic surgery?

My stomach is bulging.

18 Now 100 meters, can I enter 13 seconds?

Free fall?

What are the similarities between Wei Xiaobao and Snow White?

They all prefer group p.

At the seaside, there is a turtle that can't turn over. Would you?

Pick it up and go home to make soup.

2 1 What line do orangutans hate most?

Parallel lines ... parallel lines don't intersect (banana) ~ ~

What do you do when you want to cry and don't want to be seen?

Cover one's eyes with one's hand.

If your partner's ex died and your partner cried in front of you, how would you react?

Throw three feet of white silk and say, you might as well go with her

If you have to expose half of your body, do you expose your left or right side?

Lower position

Jasmine, rose and Chinese rose, which is the least powerful?

Jasmine ... what a beautiful (powerless) jasmine!

What color are the teeth of black and white babies?

The baby has no teeth yet.

If you had to choose one of (1 Chris Lee 2 Sister Furong 3 Flowers 4 Lv Xiulian) and get married immediately, what would you choose?

Choose death

What's your favorite pet?

Ultraman

What would you do if your opponent fell into the water?

Pee.

What would you do if you saw a MM crying by the river?

I'll secretly push her down.

3 1 If one day you suddenly disappear, do you think someone will look for you crazily?

If I still owe the bank mortgage and car loan

You fell asleep on the bus. What were you thinking when you woke up?

Ah. Am I still alive? (Because I am a driver)

You were watching TV when Sadako climbed out. Would you?

1 find a cage to raise. Learning 2, bring him the bench and shoot it back!

What kind of wheel can only turn but not walk?

The wheel of a windmill

Twins, brother's name is Tianlong, what's brother's name?

Equivalent to Mr or Sir.

Is there anyone who makes you feel sour when you think about it?

Yes, the one who bought candied haws.

What do you think your style is, love at first sight, love at third sight or love for a long time?

Cold-blooded, or a night of passion!

What is the last thing you want to do when sleeping in a warm bed at night?

Wet the bed!

39 Simple question ~ Who was the army of the Five Tigers of Shu during the Three Kingdoms period ~ I searched pigs online ~

Saint seiya, Zi Long, Glacier, Instant, Ikki.

How do two people who love each other keep their love for each other?

Kill each other and bury them in one place.

4 1 How can a man say one thing and do another?

You will wear a condom at a critical moment.

I met a robber in the middle of the night, and he said he wouldn't let you go unless he sang. What can you sing?

Hao Han Song

When did your first kiss take place?

When I was 6 years old, I said to a girl one year younger than me: I don't agree that I pushed you into the ditch.

If you are in prison, what do you do to kill time in prison?

tunnel

Your ex is married. Would you like to attend her wedding?

I just want to go to the fucking funeral!

46 13 children are divided into 9 oranges. How to divide it fairly?

Strangle four!

47 have family rules and state-owned regulations. What are the rules of the zoo?

turtle

48 pencils. What?

Xiao (surname) ... sharpen (Xiao) pencil ~ ~

Sparrows are noisy, how to make them quiet?

Press it ... crows (press) sparrows are silent ~ ~ ~

What is the most valuable thing you stole from playing Kaixin.com?

The mouse in the internet bar ...

5 1 (1-9) Which number is the most industrious? Which is the laziest?

Answer: 1 laziest, 2 most diligent ... don't stop until you do it ~ ~

What's the name of the painter's apprentice?

erotic

When is 1+2 not equal to 3?

When the calculation is wrong

Do men who smoke smell, or do men who drink smell?

And those who don't take a shower.

What is the minimum standard for making friends with you?

Must be human.

56 couplets: find a job and find a good job. Find a husband. Find a good husband?

Dream on.

Have you ever peeped into other people's privacy?

I openly robbed.

58 rubber, tiger skin and watermelon skin, which is the worst?

Eraser ... Eraser (poor) ~ ~

59 with two groups of words?

fool

Someone told you that I use mineral water to flush the toilet. How do you respond?

What I peed in was a royal salute!

6 1 What is cloth afraid of, and what is paper afraid of?

Not (cloth) afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) afraid of one thousand ~ ~

Have you ever thought about suicide?

I want to fucking kill you!

What is the thing that bothers you every day?

Constipation.

Freckles, high myopia, pie face, elephant legs, thick waist, let you choose one as your wife, which one would you choose?

I will choose a man.

How did you get the most unforgettable scar?

The cruel doctor cut it when he was born.

66 swish! I stand in front of you and look at you affectionately, and you will. . ?

Give you a day.

If your lover who has been in love for many years meets someone better than you and then leaves you, what does this prove?

Love is actually fucking ape shit! ! !

My girlfriend ate 50 kebabs in one breath, and my boyfriend said five words. What five words did she say?

Your mouth is so coquettish

How often do you take a bath in winter? In winter, take a bath

Both girls like you, one is beautiful and talented, and the other is gentle and housekeeping. Which one do you choose?

Divorce your family first

7 1 What do you think of going to Starbucks alone and sitting with a notebook all afternoon?

It's better than sitting with a notebook and soy milk.

What is the most serious consequence of being naughty at the age of 72?

Playing on a wall when I was a child ~ I accidentally slipped and kicked someone off the wall.

If your high school classmate was sitting in a KTV and you happened to meet her, would you?

I'll point her out.

A person is walking on the road, and a member of the opposite sex comes to ask you: Is this the earth? What's your answer?

If it is a beauty, I will say: I love you, Martian.

If it was a dinosaur, I would say: Go back where you came from.

The strangest name of Beijing snacks represents the state of an animal, which is sold in many places in Beijing! guess

(Answer: Snowball) Peacock green.

Which country has the largest army, China, Japan or the United States?

Japan ... Japan has a singer named Ayumi Hamasaki (soldier quick march) ~ ~ ~

Is anyone chasing you now?

Yes, I owe her 30 yuan.

78. Do you think about the opposite sex every day ~

I want to sleep with her every day.

What parts of your body have been praised?

Nails, aunt Zhao, the janitor when I was a child, always praised me. Yo, this kid's nails really look like Andy Lau's! ! !

Have you ever thought about someone who makes you want to cry?

Yes, creditors.

8 1 Now, take your eyes off the computer screen and look to the right. Tell me what you see.

My dad's slap, * * * What time is it? Don't sleep! ! !

I am very good and obedient. I know you have a boyfriend/girlfriend now, but I will wait for you. Would you want me?

You'll die, son. Go home.

Who should be beaten the most in history?

Su Wu ... Suwu shepherd Beihai (kicked by the sea) ~ ~

Someone has a crush on you, will you be tempted when you know it?

I think I'll change my mind.

What do you learn most from Lei Feng?

Holding the eldest sister-in-law to send the children home.

86. How can I express my love for a person in order to win my heart? Spend money like water.

Why do you say that women wearing high heels mean getting married?

Because you walk slowly in high heels, it is easy for men to catch up with you.

What is the most effective way to give up someone and forget?

Learn from Altman

Chuchu's birthday is March 30th. What year is this year?

March 30th every year.

90 ICAC is the independent commission against corruption. What is ICBC?

(Answer: Industrial and Commercial Bank of China) Independent Commission Against Corruption (ICAC)

Classic funny quotations from post-90s generation.

1. Women like to watch the waves in the sea, so men are not waves.

2. If you fall, stand up, change your posture and fall again.

From primary school to university, the only constant is a heart that doesn't want to learn.

Everyone else is pretending to be serious, so I have to pretend not to be serious.

It is said that people with big faces can't use touch-screen mobile phones because they hang up when they smile.

6. Oh, I'll go. You are so busy that you have to go to the bathroom by yourself.

7. It's the same as monasticism, except that you correct Tao and I practice bystander Tao.

8. Don't accuse me of spelling in the future. This is anti-counterfeiting technology.

9. Good women never claim to be noble, but people all recognize their nobility.

10. Simple life is a gorgeous adventure.

1 1. Why do you want to prove something to people who are not worth it? Life is better for yourself.

12. Women who are not good to me, curse you for being drained by Hu.

13. Looking at the people locked out, did they lose or did we win?

14. Every time I look in the mirror, the courage to live comes back.

15. It is said that handsome men are unreliable, so why are many single people not handsome?

16. It takes a hundred years to build a boat and a thousand years to build bunks.

17. The mentality of the standard female diaosi is: I don't have a man, so I am fat for the winter.

18. I was so happy to see the news that you were lovelorn and that there was an earthquake in Japan.

19. I pretend to work for my boss, and my boss pretends to pay me.

Forgiving him is God's business. All I can do is send him to God.

2 1. I like you so much that you will die.

You have the right to remain silent, but everything you say will be your last words.

23. Can you stop talking? You exposed your IQ as soon as you opened your mouth.

24. Without us students with poor grades, how can we set off students' grades?

25. I have to admire my female friend for wearing shorts in such a cold day.

26. A woman's love is like wine. The more it is brewed, the stronger it is. A man's love is like tea. The more it is brewed, the weaker it is.

27. I want to make a lot of money for my father, and then I will be a rich second generation.

28. Wearing red underwear is Superman, and wearing black underwear is not Batman.

29. What's so strange about being thin? My sister used to be thin, but have you ever been fat?

30. Every time someone says I'm ugly, I feel sad. I went blind at a young age.

3 1. The reason why I grow black is because I don't want to live my life in vain.

32. There is really nothing like a school uniform. You can hide your mobile phone in your sleeve, put your book in your pocket, roll up your pillow, spread it out as a blanket, and dare to rub it anywhere.

33. Many people say that I can eat by my face, but I don't. I have to eat with my mouth.

34. I've been single for a long time, and suddenly I found that I found a sow very nice recently.

35. "How to euphemistically describe a person with a big face?" "Looking at your face from a distance seems close at hand."

36. You never know which of your best friends will be the next WeChat business.

37. It's windy outside and I'm scared. If everyone else is blown away, I can't. That's a real pity.

38. When you are young, try not to fall in love early. Knowing that you are ugly, ugly and short too early will affect the exam.

39. Women should be kind to themselves, or once you are exhausted, someone will sleep with your man.

40. Friends are like quilts. What really warms you is your own body temperature.

4 1. Damn mosquito, I'm not your father. Why do you always eat mine and drink mine …

42. The most wonderful thing in life is not the moment when you realize your dream, but the process of sticking to it!

43. Do wholesalers have to go to the toilet together? Don't be so obvious

44. I want to sleep in class, sleep and eat, and eat and read. Alas, I'm worried about you!

45. Failure is the mother of success! Why didn't I have children once?

46. I remember that my former close friends became more and more cold.

47. People fall in love by looks, routines and burning money, while I fall in love by blind date.

48. Being a handsome boy is tiring, I really know that.

49. If you take the initiative, we will have a story; If you are excited, we even have children!

Don't blame your partner for being too strict with you. We don't even have partners.

5 1. People who say that girls will not admit that they are wrong are lying with their eyes open, so my wife confessed to me: "I was wrong, I should never have married you!"

You should find someone who can make you laugh, not me who makes you cry.

53. What's wrong with my short stature? I am short. What's the matter? I am short. What's the matter? I'm short, you can't even lift your head in front of me!

54. You look serious, just like a roadside movie.

55. Everyone else uses Chanel bags, lv bags, Dior bags ... and I, I use Yan characters!

A classic belonging to the post-90 s, tell me funny.

1. I can play the woman, but that person hasn't appeared yet.

2. How many people have told you that you can't live without you, and then where are they?

It turns out that love is not chasing possession, but I have always wanted to possess you.

4. Learn to turn a blind eye, choose to ignore disgusting things, and choose to block disgusting things.

5. Execution does not talk about if, only about results.

6. You will become a great beauty one day.

7. Happiness is not Cao Cao, as you said.

If you want to marry the person you love deeply, please turn on the light.

9. Everyone's heart is a battlefield full of corpses.

10. Maybe one day you will come to me and sympathize with me.

1 1. If you love it, you will get used to it.

12. Some people cheat for a lifetime, while others cheat a person for a lifetime.

13. No matter how powerful I become, you are still my weakness. If I make a move, crack day will collapse.

14. Happiness, not Cao Cao, hit the nail on the head.

15. I am very happy to meet you among hundreds of millions of people, my love.

16. Happiness, not Cao Cao, hit the nail on the head.

17. How can you throw in the towel with natural pride!

18. There are a group of lovely grass mud horses on the other side of the mountain.

19. I can spoil you or change you.

20. Except for the appearance of a third party, all the reasons for breaking up are nonsense.

2 1. If I choose to love you, then I will love you to the end!

22. How mean a person must be to deserve you.

23. Don't fall in love with me. You are hypocritical. We can get married.

24. If a man loves you, he can do whatever he wants. If he doesn't love you, even dying for him thinks you are unnecessary.

Please don't judge me by your ignorance.

26. If you don't send a message, you really think I'm a man!

27. People who like me will love you; I can't help people who don't like me. After all, I am not omnipotent and cannot be loved by everyone.

28. I want to tell you that I am not your parents and there are not so many stories for you to remember.

29. The world is so big that there is only one me. Look at it and cherish it.

30. Even if you can see through my soul, it doesn't mean you can see through my heart.

3 1. I'm really happy with you.

Remember that you are a woman, and then, fight like a man.

As long as you are by my side, all the gossip is completely ignored.

34.-Sometimes others are taken too seriously, and in the end they are nothing.

35. During the lecture, the zipper of the female teacher's pants opened, and a girl reminded: Teacher, your door is not closed! The teacher waved his hand: Never mind, the dean will visit in a moment.

36. Happiness, not Cao Cao, comes when it comes.

37. Literati hide in the network, waiting for beautiful women; Escape from the complexity of the world makes me speechless all day.

38. I am always alone when I am sad.

39. There is a kind of love that lives in my heart and accompanies me through many silent cries.

40. Ah, why is there a shoe here? Sorry, you still have one on your foot.