Funny short joke stories (generally 14)
The jokes are short in length, the plot is simple and clever, and often unexpected, giving people the wonderful feeling that the God of Laughter has suddenly arrived. characteristics. Most of them reveal the perverse phenomena in life, which are ironic and entertaining. There are different levels of interest. The following is a collection of funny short joke stories that I hope can help everyone.
Funny Short Joke Stories Part 1
A certain chief had a hobby of listening to stories. One day, he held a banquet for guests. After his repeated requests, a guest from out of town told a very interesting story:
This guest had met a very pretentious man in the city. The guest said to him: "Please Guess what I have in my pocket. If you guess correctly, I will give you half of these eggs; if you can guess the number of eggs, I will give you all ten eggs."
The man thought for a long time and said: "Friend, although I am not stupid, I can't know everything. I can't guess."
The guest said: "Guess again "This thing is white on the outside and yellow on the inside." "Guessed it!" the man said loudly, "it must be a pile of white radishes with a potato hidden in the middle."
Hearing this. , the guests all laughed, and the chief laughed even more. Finally he asked:
"That's really a fool. Dear friend, please tell us now, what exactly are you putting in your pocket?" Funny Short Joke Story 2
John and Mike bet two thousand dollars that he could dance with Madonna, and he actually won. Then he bet that he could have dinner with Mrs. Clinton, and Mike lost again. Finally, John bet that he could attend a major religious ceremony with the Pope. At that ceremony, John and the Pope stood together. From a distance, he saw a man next to Mike whispering to him. , Mike fainted and fell to the ground.
Afterwards, Mike explained that I was not surprised that you were with Madonna, and it was nothing to have dinner with *** Clinton, but when you and the Pope showed up, the man next to me asked me a question At that time, I fainted. What he asked was "Who is that person next to John?" Funny Short Joke Story 3
There was an old farmer who had raised more than 20 hens and a rooster for several years. As he got older, the fertilization rate of the eggs could not increase, so he thought about buying a young and strong rooster from the market to replace the old rooster.
On this day, I brought back a young rooster, with beautiful feathers on its body, head held high, tall body, bright eyes, and a high crest. As soon as he was thrown into the flock of chickens, before the little rooster could say anything, the old hens gathered around and greeted him. The owner was very happy when he saw it. He said proudly, I still have eyesight, and the little rooster is very popular, so he left. It's open.
The old rooster was very unhappy when he saw this situation. He came over and said with a smile: "Brother, welcome to your new home. You are so handsome. I just didn't know you were chasing me." What are the skills of the little girl?"
The little rooster said without showing any signs of weakness: I am young and strong, and I was still the 100-meter champion in school.
The old rooster said: Really? No wonder the muscles are so developed. I used to have them too, but now I am old and unable to do what I want. Brother, why don’t we compete and run a hundred meters? I will lose. These girls are all for you.
The little rooster was even more happy when he heard it, and he immediately wanted to compete. The old rooster said that this is good. If we start from the same starting point, you will definitely surpass me. How about this, I run 5 meters less and you are behind me. We start at the same time and see how far you can catch up with me. No more than 100 meters. Mi, you win. It doesn't take more than 100 meters for a rooster to chase a hen. It mainly depends on the rooster's sprinting ability. Whoever has stronger explosive power will have the upper hand.
So the two roosters began to race around the yard.
At this time, the scene was very lively. Some cheered for the old rooster, and some shouted for the little rooster. The yard turned into a mess, with chickens and dogs jumping around.
At this time, the owner heard, looked at the situation, turned around and took the gun, aimed at the little rooster and fired. The poor little rooster fell to the ground and fell several meters away. The yard suddenly became quiet. My husband The chicken felt aggrieved and walked to his master and said: Master, this new guy doesn't like the opposite sex and he wants to fuck me. Funny Short Joke Stories 4
On a bus, the flight attendant saw an old man coming up and had nowhere to sit. She glanced around, walked up to the old man and said politely: "Hello! Sir, could you please give up your seat?"
The old man said angrily: "Why should you ask me to give up my seat? I am almost seventy years old!"
The flight attendant said with a look of embarrassment: "Yes! You are almost seventy years old. We can all see that, but the other passengers on the bus today are all over eighty years old. Sorry, you are the youngest." , you say so!"
The old man's face suddenly turned red. Funny Short Joke Stories 5
When the pension system was implemented before World War I, there was an old fisherman named Dai Lewis who was over seventy years old and fully qualified to receive a pension. However, he could not produce a birth certificate to prove this. One day, a local official came to visit him.
The following is their conversation: "Where were you born, Day?" "County Cork."
"Don't you remember when you were born?" "No. "That was a long time ago."
"When did you leave Ireland?" "I left home at the age of thirteen and went to a farm in northern Scotland, where I lived for nineteen years. After twenty-five years as a fisherman's guide, I worked as a gamekeeper for seventeen years and then moved here." "How long have you lived here, Day?" he asked loudly in the kitchen. Fan's wife: "How long have we been married, Mary? Thirty-four years?"
The official put down his pen and said, "Based on what you just talked about, you should be one hundred and eight years old." "God, time flies so fast!" Funny Short Joke Story 6
Achao drives for his boss and must be on call at all times. That night, it was already past twelve o'clock when Ah Chao sent his boss home. Just as he was about to get out of the car, he suddenly thought that he would definitely fall asleep when he lay down again. He might as well sleep in the car! So he rolled down the window. , lying down on the back seat.
I don’t know how long it took, but Ah Chao suddenly felt the wind blowing in his ears. He opened his eyes and saw, oh my God, the car was being driven forward as hard as possible! It seemed that he was so asleep that he didn't notice it just now, and the car thief was probably in a panic and didn't notice that he was still lying in the back seat. personal. Ah Chao blamed himself for being too careless and threw the keys on the front seat.
A Chao didn’t dare to show his anger. He looked secretly and saw a dark figure holding the steering wheel with both hands. He seemed to be in a panic and drove bumpyly out of the city and onto a country road. Finally, the car stopped in front of a remote house. The car thief opened the car door and jumped into the yard. No! I'm going to call my accomplices. If I don't leave now, when will I wait? Ah Chao quickly got up and took a look, haha, the car key was still inserted in the keyhole!
As he said this Soon after, Chao lit the ignition, stepped on the accelerator, and the car drove off like an arrow. Seeing that they were driving into the city, Ah Chao finally breathed a sigh of relief. Just then, the boss called. As soon as Ah Chao was connected, he heard his boss yell angrily: "Chao, don't sleep, the car has been stolen! Get up and take a look!" Ah Chao burst out laughing: "Don't worry, boss, the car is not missing. , the car thief was so stupid, I drove him back again!"
When the boss heard this, he said angrily: "Who are you calling the car thief? You are such a chao, my mother has this habit all the time. , I want to take her to the hospital. I see you are sleeping soundly in the car and I can’t bear to wake you up, so I will drive it myself.
You're lucky, you actually drove the car back! Come back quickly, if something happens to my mother, I won't be done with you!" Funny Short Joke Story 7
Isaac came to the boss's office , stretched his head in and said: "Mr. Levy, excuse me, I wonder if it is convenient for you to say a few words to me now. I want to talk to you about my decision. "
"Okay," Mr. Levy said, "Come in quickly, sit down, and tell me if you have anything. "
"That's great," Isaac replied. "You know, I've been working for your company for nearly seven years. "
"Yes, of course I know," Mr. Levi said, "You are a pretty good employee. "
"Thank you for the compliment, boss," Isaac said, "Then I won't beat around the bush. I want to raise my salary. There are four companies looking for me now, but I think before making a decision, I should Let me talk to you first. "
"Oh, you want a salary increase, right? Mr. Levi said, "I understand your feelings very well. I can give you a salary increase. However, the current economic situation is very bad, which has a great impact on our sales. It may not be time to give you a salary increase." "
"Yes, I can understand," Isaac said, "However, you must consider my hard work, the benefits I have created for the company, and my loyalty to the company over the past seven years! "
After listening to this, Mr. Levi was silent for a while, thinking about what Isaac said, and then said to Isaac: "Okay, Isaac, given what you have done for the company for many years. Contribution, I don’t want to lose talent, so I decided to increase your salary by US$2,500 every year and add an extra five days of vacation, so you can stay? "
"Great, it's settled," Isaac replied, "Thank you so much!
"Okay," Mr. Levi said, "I will sign the salary increase document for you now, but before you leave, can you tell me which companies are looking for you?" "
"Oh, the electric company, the gas company, the water company and the telecommunications company. "Funny Short Joke Story 8
Xiao Li had some conflicts with his girlfriend. After a week of stalemate, Xiao Li couldn't hold it anymore and decided to apologize to his girlfriend first.
In the evening, it happened that a football match was being broadcast on TV, and both Xiao Li and his girlfriend were fans, so Xiao Li thought for a moment and then sent his girlfriend a WeChat message: "Dear head coach, after a week of adjustments, I feel that I have regained my form again, and I beg you to give me a chance to start. "
Soon Xiao Li received a reply: "I will further investigate your current status. During this period, I hope you will continue to adjust your mentality in the substitute lineup. "
Seeing that his girlfriend was still a little bit unforgiving towards him, Xiao Li couldn't help but feel a little angry, so he made a big deal in his second WeChat message: "I need a chance to prove myself. If you continue to arrange If I am a substitute, then I have to consider a transfer. "
After this message was sent, my girlfriend responded even more quickly: "In view of the current sufficient personnel in the team and the stable main lineup, I agree to your transfer application. You have become a free agent from now on. You can Feel free to find a new team without having to report back. "
After reading this message, Xiao Li quickly called his girlfriend, but she didn't answer. At this time, the roommate on the side joked: "You should apologize to the head coach in person tomorrow. "
The next day, Xiao Li went to his girlfriend's house after careful preparation. When he came back in the evening, Xiao Li looked happy. His roommate asked: "Has the head coach forgive you?
Xiao Li waved his hand and said, "The head coach is not at home." "
"Then - you? "
"I directly made the two club presidents happy. They unanimously recognized my performance. Not only was it okay to return to the team, they even planned to sign a long-term contract with me! "Funny Short Jokes and Stories Part 9
Although Gong Mingyi, together with the famous musicians Zhong Ziqi and Yu Boya, are known as the three great musical talents, since he was ridiculed by the two last time, Gong Mingyi does not dare to play the piano to others rashly anymore. .
So he turned down all commercial performances and stayed at home to think over and over again. What was the reason that made the cow indifferent to the sound of his piano?
In fact, it is a common courtesy to play the piano to the cow. Challenging a new Guinness World Record: using piano sounds to make cows interact with themselves. Once you succeed, you will receive a considerable amount of bonus. In this way, the rest of your life will be guaranteed.
After some advice from an expert, Gong Mingyi finally understood that the crux lay in the selection of tracks. The reason why it failed last time was because the piece played was "High Mountains and Flowing Waters" by Yu Boya. The piece was too obscure and too profound for ordinary people to understand, let alone a cow. The expert then gave some advice: "If you change the piece The cry of the young calf will definitely cause the cow to croak. This is called the deep love between mother and child. "
It was said that it was late, but it was sooner than later. Early the next morning, it was dawn. Yi then came to the grassland with a group of media reporters and Guinness notaries. When everything was ready, facing the cow, Gong Mingyi performed the song "Only Mom in the World" flawlessly. This time, Gong Mingyi can be said to have maximized his playing potential.
However, the blind man lights the lamp and rejoices in vain. After finishing playing, the cow was still gnawing on the green grass as if no one else was watching.
When Gong Mingyi saw this, he broke the guqin that had been with him for many years in public and left angrily. Unexpectedly, Niu Erjing spoke. It looked at Gong Mingyi and said earnestly: "Brother Gongming, I've been deaf for almost a year. Didn't anyone tell you?"
After hearing this, Gong Mingyi let out a long sigh: "Wow, I was deaf. "My heart is toward the bright moon, but the moon shines in the ditch." Funny Short Joke Story 10
Once upon a time, there was a king who had two daughters. When the two daughters reached the age of marriage, the king decided to find a bride for them. On the day of the wedding, the king said to the prince of the kingdom who came: Whoever of you can do well in the test questions I set, I will marry my eldest daughter to him! So the king asked the guards to bring an elephant to the river. Then he said: If anyone can make an elephant jump into the river with his butt covered, I will marry my eldest daughter to him!
Princes from all over the world can't think of a way. At this moment, a Persian prince came over and said to the king: If I can do it, can you marry your daughter to me? Although the king was unwilling to marry his daughter to this "black man", he had no choice but to agree.
The prince walked over and looked at the elephant. Suddenly he took out a needle from his back and pierced the elephant’s butt! The elephant immediately covered its butt and carried it into the river! The king had no choice but to put the elephant into the river. The eldest daughter married him.
When the second daughter got married, the king thought that it would not be so easy to marry off his daughter, so he asked another question: Who can make the elephant nod first, then shake its head, then nod, and then If he jumped into the river again, he would marry his second daughter to him!
Coincidentally, it was still the same elephant, but the princes from all over the world tried their best and couldn't come up with a solution! Finally, the Persian prince came over again He said: If I can do this, should I marry my second daughter to me? The king had no choice but to agree.
Prince Boss walked over and looked at the elephant for a while and said to the elephant: Do you still know me? The elephant nodded. Do you still imagine what it was like last time? The elephant shook his head. Do you know what to do? The elephant nodded again, then covered his butt and jumped into the river.
Funny Short Joke Stories 11
In a desert, a man was riding a camel on a road.
After a while, a car came from them The camel rider came up from behind. The camel rider got off and waved to the car, and the car stopped in front of him. The camel rider said, "It's so hot when I walk in the desert. Can you let me go?" Can I take a ride and get some air conditioning?"
Bryan, the driver, replied: "Yes, that's fine! But what about your camel?"
The man said : "It doesn't matter, it will follow your car."
Bryan said: "Okay, just get in the car."
At first Bryan drove 60 kilometers ( speed), looking in the rearview mirror, the camel seemed to be keeping up easily. So he accelerated to 80 kilometers, and looked at the camel again, it was still so relaxed.
He He just wanted to test the camel's ability...
He simply soared to 120 kilometers in one breath. Later, he asked the owner of the camel and said, "Your camel Is it really okay? I saw that it was already sticking out its tongue..."
When the man heard this, he nervously asked: "Which way is its tongue sticking out?"
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Bryan said: "On the right!"
The man said: "Hurry up and drive the car to the left, it is about to overtake~~" Funny Short Joke Story 12
The bear market finally came, and the three friends who originally relied on stocks to make a living had no choice but to start looking for jobs. The three of them came to a restaurant together to apply for a job. The boss asked the first person: "What are your specialties?" Answer: "I used to be a trader and I know how to trade." Question: "How is your craft?"
Answer: "It's nothing, just that I can The stock price has only increased from 5 yuan to 50 yuan." The boss was very happy and said, "I really know how to trade, that's great. I need a chef here, and it's you." The second person handed over his resume, and the boss flipped it over. He turned it over and said, "Oh, he's a stock critic. Well, your job is to stand at the door every day and pull people in when you see them. Isn't this difficult for you?"
The second person smiled and said: "Simple, simple." The boss turned around and asked the third person: "What do you do?" The man was so embarrassed that he didn't dare to say anything. The second person hurriedly said: "I brought him here. He is a retail investor. He can just arrange a job like washing dishes and sweeping the floor." The boss was a little embarrassed and said, "I am a very high-level person here. What do you want retail investors to do?" While I was sitting, I suddenly heard a noise coming from the lobby. The boss hurriedly called a waiter and asked her what happened. The waiter replied: "I forgot to buy meat today. The dishes ordered by the guests could not be delivered for a long time. I am losing my temper." The boss suddenly panicked. At this time, the retail investor next to him suddenly pulled out a sharp knife and straightened his trouser legs. , cut off a large piece of meat with a sharp knife, threw it bloody to the waiter, and said, "Take it for emergency first." He turned to the boss and said, "I don't have any other skills. I cut meat all the time. If you don't believe me, just ask. The two of them."
The boss, Dayue, said: "Very good, let's go to work today." Funny Short Joke Stories 13
Today, Brother Pig is going to meet a good friend. When playing at home, it goes out early in the morning.
Little Pig walked and came to a small river. There is a bridge over the river. This bridge is a single-plank bridge. Little Pig didn't dare to move when he walked up to it, because the bridge was very narrow and the river was still rushing underneath! Just when Little Pig was scared, a naughty little monkey came over from the other side of the bridge and shouted loudly. : "It's broken, it's broken! Look, Little Pig is going to fall into the river!" Little Pig was already scared, but after being frightened by the little monkey, he didn't dare to move.
He lowered his head and looked at its shadow reflected in the river. The shadow seemed to be laughing at it: "Little Pig, Little Pig, why are you so ungrateful? You don't even dare to cross the single-plank bridge!
Little Pig thought: What should I do if the little monkey scares me and the river laughs at me? Little Pig was so anxious that he cried and shouted: "Mom, Mom, come quickly!" But Mom was far away from here and couldn't hear her. Yeah.
The little frogs heard it, and they "Plop, Pulu" came out of the water and said to Little Pig: "Little Pig, Little Pig, don't be afraid, look forward. , don’t look under the water, straighten your chest, straighten your waist, take steps, one, two, one, two, and you’re gone!”
Little Pig listened to the little frog’s words, raised his head, and looked forward. Look, hold your chest up, straighten your back, take big steps, one, two, one, two! Hey, it’s over. Before the tears dried, Piggy smiled happily.
The little brother turned around and nodded at the little frog: "Thank you, little frog. Goodbye!" When the little frog saw that the little pig brother passed safely, he happily got into the water. Funny short jokes. Story 14
In the hot summer, the ants work hard. They get up early every morning and work hard
Their neighbors-crickets. , but he sings "chichichichi, chichichi, chichi" every day, doing nothing and living a pampered life.
The cricket feels very strange about the hard work of the ant. "Hey! Hey! Mr. Ant." , why do you have to work so hard? Wouldn’t it be nice to take a break occasionally and sing like me?”
However, the ant continued to work without rest at all and said: “In the summer Only by accumulating food can we prepare for the severe cold winter!" "We really don't have extra time to sing and play!"
When the cricket heard what the ant said, he ignored the ant. "Ah! What a fool, Why do you keep thinking about things in the future for so long!"
The happy summer is over, autumn has passed, and winter has finally come, with the north wind blowing and snowflakes falling in the sky.
The cricket was so emaciated, there was snow everywhere, and he couldn't find any food.
"How great it would be if I were like Mr. Ant, storing food in the summer!" Cricket. The ants staggered on the snow as if they were about to fall down.
The ants who had been working did not care when winter came, and they had accumulated a lot of food and built a warm home.
When the cricket found the ants' home, the ants were eating happily!
"Mr. Ant, please give me something? I'm so hungry that I'm about to die!"
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The ants were startled. "Hey! Aren't you the Mr. Cricket we met in the summer? You were singing all the time in the summer, and we thought you would be dancing in the winter! Come on. Come on! Eat something, and when you recover, can you sing happy songs to us?"
Facing the kind and kind ants, the cricket couldn't help but shed tears of joy. ;