The samurai said, "It's nice to be called a samurai!"
The expert said, "It's nice to be called an expert!" "
The swordsman said, "You talk, I'll go first!"
Peking University said: I am from Peking University.
Tianjin University said: I am older.
Shanghai University said: I went to college.
Xiamen University said: You talk, I'll go first!
General Li Zongren said: I am a benevolent man!
General fu said to him: I am just!
General Yu Dayou said: I am a man with great potential!
General Huo Qubing said: You talk, I'll go first!
The students of normal college said: I am from normal college.
The students in vocational colleges said: I am from vocational colleges.
The student of the Air Force Academy said: I am from the Air Force Academy.
The students of the technical college said: You talk, I'll go first!
One day, when the teacher came into the classroom, the students all stood up and shouted, "Good morning, teacher!" " "
The teacher said angrily, "Good morning? What shall I do in the afternoon? Not good? "
So the students shouted together: "Good afternoon, teacher!"
The teacher said angrily, "What about my evening?"
The students shouted together again: "Good evening, teacher!" "
The teacher nodded and said, "That's it. Now shout it again! " "
The students shouted: "Good morning, teacher, good afternoon and good evening!" "
The teacher said, "Sit down! Today we are going to review antonyms. Let's practice like this. When I say something, you say the antonym loudly. Start now. "
Teacher: "The weather is fine today."
Student: "The weather is terrible today."
Teacher: "There is sunshine everywhere."
Student: "There are clouds everywhere."
Teacher: "The road is crowded with people."
Student: "There is no one on the road."
Teacher: "Young."
Student: "Old."
Teacher: "Stand."
Student: "Lie down"
Teacher: "There is a young man standing on the road."
Student: "There is an old man lying on the road."
Teacher: "I found a dollar."
Student: "I lost a dollar."
Teacher: "I found a dollar and gave it to the teacher."
Student: "I stole a teacher and lost a dollar."
Teacher: "No, you can't say that!" " "
Student: "Correct, you should say so!" " "
Teacher: "Wrong."
Student: "Correct."
Teacher: "that won't do, it's illegal!" " "
Student: "This is ok, this is a legal act!" " "
Teacher: "I was wrong."
Student: "We are right."
Teacher: "Listen to the teacher, what the teacher said is right!" " "
Student: "Listen to us, everything the teacher said is wrong!" " "
Teacher: "You are so stupid."
Student: "We are very smart."
Teacher: "Stop!"
Student: "Go on!"
Teacher: "You stop now! Stop it! "
Student: "Go on now! Say it! "
Teacher: "You stupid pigs, I said stop!" " "
Student: "We are all geniuses, we say go on!" " "
Teacher: "You listen to the teacher!" " "
Student: "The teacher listens to us!" " "
Teacher: "all students have to listen to the teacher!" " "
Student: "The teacher should listen to the students!" " "
Teacher: "now you stop practicing!" " "
Student: "Now let's continue to practice!" "
Teacher: "Are you endless?"
Student: "We finish what we started!" "
Teacher: "Then stop! Stupid pig! "
Student: "Then we should continue! Genius! " ..................................................................................................................................................................................
A Chinese teacher from Shandong Province read an ancient poem "Wochun" by Lu You to the students and asked them to dictate.
The Chinese teacher read aloud as follows. A student dictated the following.
Wo Chun, I'm stupid.
Mume smells flowers, I have no culture.
I hate the bottom, I have a low IQ,
If you hear me lying like water, ask me who I am.
Eduardo Chun Lv. A big donkey.
The coast is green, I am a donkey,
The coast is green, I am a donkey,
The coast is like a dark green. I am a stupid donkey.
Wochun, I'm stupid,
I have no culture, because I lie in the plum blossom and smell the flowers.
Weave and paint the sky. I can only farm.
The fish kissed Shi Shui and wanted to know who I was.
Answer Chun Lv with a lying stone. I am a big donkey.
1. Title: While ... While ... Teacher's comment: Does he want to take it off or wear it? )
2. Title: textbooks
Children write: class is boring. (Teacher's comment: Pay attention to the lecture in class)
3. title: innocence
The child wrote: It's really hot today. (Teacher's comment: You are so naive)
4. Title: Among them
Children write: My left foot is hurt. Teacher's comment: Are you a centipede? )
5. Title: Look.
The child wrote: What are you looking at? Never seen it! (Teacher's comment: Don't procrastinate too much! )
Example: You (singing) and I (dancing)
The child wrote: How are you? My teacher commented: Are you writing an English translation? )
7. Make sentences as usual. Ex.: People praise me (), but actually I ().
The child wrote: others praised me (very handsome), in fact, I (wearing a mask) teacher commented: What mask is so easy to use? )
8. Title: One by one
The child wrote: After work, my father came back one after another. Teacher's comment: How many dads do you have? )
9. theme: first ... then ... for example: eat first, then take a bath.
Children write: goodbye, sir!
10. It's raw
The child wrote: On the night of the power outage, it was dark everywhere, and I was so scared that my skin was raw! (Teacher's comment: Seeing this sentence, the teacher admires you. )
1 1. Title: Prosperity-a metaphor for beautiful growth.
The child wrote: My brother is thriving. Teacher's comment: Son, is your brother a vegetable? )
There is a better one. Children write: bustling confession. Teacher's comment: Don't watch too many series. )
12. Title: Sure enough
The child wrote: I ate fruit yesterday and then drank cold water. Teacher's comment: This is a phrase. You can't make a sentence alone. ) The child said: I'm not finished yet, teacher. Sure enough, I have diarrhea at night! (Teacher ...)
13. Theme: Delicious
Children write: delicious fart. (Teacher's comment: ...)
14. Title: In addition,
Children write: A train passes by, besides, besides ... (Teacher ...)
One day, it began to rain. Dad said to his son, "son, if someone comes to borrow an umbrella, you can refuse him." I'll hide in the room first! " As soon as dad hid in the room, a man came to borrow an umbrella. The son said, "No, you borrow one, he borrows one, and our family will have no umbrella!" " Say that finish, the man went away. Dad came out and said, "At this time, you should say,' If you have an umbrella, your bones are scattered and your skin is broken. "I've thrown it away," "Dad said, and I'm hiding in it again. Then the neighbor came to borrow the cat. The son said, "There is a cat whose bones are falling apart and its skin is broken. I have already thrown it away! " The neighbor listened and left. Dad came out again and said, "You should say,' Recently, the cat is weak and is going to have kittens. "It was tied up in the warehouse." "Then Dad hid in the room again. At this time, my father's colleague came to see my father, and my son said, "Recently, my father is weak and is going to have a baby, and he is tied up in the warehouse!" " My colleague left with a smile, and my father was dizzy in the room! ! ! Xiao Ming gets angry when he scolds him.
One day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming, "1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming didn't know, so the teacher told him to go back and ask his parents. Xiao Ming first asked his father who was trading stocks, "It's up, it's up!" " Then I asked my mother that she was quarreling with her neighbor and said, "Leave it alone!" " Xiaoming went to ask grandpa again. Grandpa is singing: "forward, forward!" " Xiaoming went to ask his sister again. She's in love. She said first, "Honey, where are we going?" He said, "Let's go, dear!" Xiaoming had no choice but to ask his younger brother who was playing with toys, "I am invincible donkey kong!" " "
The next day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming 1+ 1=? Xiao Ming said, "Yes, yes!" The teacher said, "What are you talking about?" Xiao Ming said, "Don't worry!" The teacher said, "You stand at the back of the classroom!" " Xiao Ming said, "Forward, forward!" After class, the teacher said, "Come with me!" Xiao Ming said, "Honey, where are we going?" The teacher said, "Go to my office!" Xiao Ming said, "Let's go, dear!" " The teacher was very angry and said, "Who do you think you are?" Xiao Ming replied: "I am invincible donkey kong!" Say that finish, the teacher fainted! ! !