As parents, who doesn't "expect children to succeed" and "expect women to succeed"? Who doesn't pin their dreams of life on their children? From the moment the child is pregnant, we are sacredly appointed as the first teacher of the child. However, who was born to be a father and a mother? Born to know how to educate and train children? Gorky said: "Love your children, this is what hens will do, but educating children well is an art." We all love our children, so we should all be artists of family education. But some things often backfire.
When we see that the children trained by thrifty parents have become useless talents who can only do papers, be human and do nothing, we find that it is our parents with great mothers and loving fathers who have personally taken away the happiness of their children's childhood and the romance of teenagers, dragging their hands and pushing them into a dead end of life. Can we not be sad? ! After drawing a painful lesson, I swear: I will never let my daughter become such a nerd who is useless to the country and family! I want her to grow up happily and healthily. No matter what career or position she will take in the future, she should at least be a person with all-round development and good comprehensive quality.
Here, please allow me to share with you some of my personal tutoring experience for your criticism and correction.
First, create a situation to stimulate children's hobbies
In May 2008, Madison Middle School in Nevada, USA, gave a question in the entrance examination: Bill Gates had five locked drawers on his desk, which were marked with wealth, interest, happiness, honor and success respectively. Gates always takes only one key and locks the other four in the drawer. Excuse me, which key is Gates carrying? In which drawer or drawers are the other four locks?
Bill Gates wrote this sentence in his reply to the school: What you are interested in hides the secret of your life. Interest itself is deciphered.
For children, the world and everything constitute a mysterious and endless world. Children's curious, active and imitative nature makes them full of strong curiosity and interest in everything around them. It is our parents' responsibility to open doors and windows and bring our children into this beautiful world.
Since my daughter was born, I have been with her all the way, enjoying the flowers and the moon, counting stars and scattering bread crumbs to catch ants on the way to walk. Pick wild fruits, build sand cities, touch fish and shrimp, dig stoves and have picnics during the outing season. Let her feel the beauty and fun of nature between breaths; We raise small animals together: silkworm babies, chicken dolls, ducklings, rabbits, goldfish, tadpoles, turtles and crabs ... many small animals used to be guests of our animal corner. In the process of changing water, feeding and cleaning them, my daughter learned what is responsibility and what is love. Shells we have eaten, bottles we have drunk, rags we have used and thread ends are all our handmade materials. In the hands-on practice, our daughter experienced the joy of creation. In the scene we created for her, she unconsciously joined various hobbies: singing, dancing, playing the piano, drawing, telling stories, reading, writing, reciting, giving speeches, making small crafts ... These hobbies made her lucky to know many friends and made her feel happier in life.
In children's eyes, the world is brand-new and wonderful, so they explore it in their own way. Parents can only guide or inspire, not blame or stifle because of personal likes and dislikes.
When my daughter was four years old, fast reading teaching in kindergarten became a fashion trend. After a rigorous intelligence test, my daughter became a member of the kindergarten fast reading experimental class. On the first day, I recognized eight Chinese characters: group, knot, diligence, labor, courage, courage, sincerity and reality. My husband and wife are both surprised and excited. But before we woke up from the child prodigy's dream, she came home from school the next day and resolutely stopped learning to read. After my daughter went to bed, I studied her textbook carefully. I found that children's language and children's beautiful fairy tale world could not be found between the lines of the textbook. On the third day, after I sent my daughter to the garden, with the permission of the teacher, I stayed and listened to a reading literacy class. Personally, I think the literacy class is boring, so we decided to give up the fast reading experiment. From my daughter's smiling face, I understand that only what is suitable for children is the best.
Second, seize the opportunity to explore and exercise children's potential.
Let's carefully review the growth process of children, and we can easily find that almost every child has some outstanding performances that surprise his parents. These unforgettable shots are showing us the potential abilities and qualities of children. Unfortunately, busy parents failed to notice it in time, and therefore missed the best opportunity for education and guidance.
Helen Keller, who was blind, deaf and dumb before she was two years old, was admitted to Harvard University at the age of 16. After graduating from college, she became a famous speaker and writer. Her books have been translated into 50 languages and sold well all over the world. Her outstanding talent has made her a spokesperson for the interests of the blind and deaf in nearly 30 countries on five continents. Why did Helen Keller achieve such great success in the case of severe physical disability? Because she has parents and mentors who love her deeply, understand her and trust her. It was they who discovered Helen's interest and advantages in reading and writing in time and gave her scientific education and guidance in time. Therefore, Helen's success is a miracle created by intelligent family education and love.
Just as there is only one Helen Keller, every child is unique in this world. As long as we are good at observing and understanding children and discovering and grasping opportunities, we will let the world see how different and amazing our children are!
When my daughter went to kindergarten at the age of one and a half, we found that under our education, compared with children of the same age or even older than her, her language expression ability and action performance ability showed obvious advantages. In order to give full play to her special skills, we have carefully created activities such as telling stories, fighting and sketch performances. In these tips, we found that mom and dad's caring eyes, a knowing smile and a simple compliment all brought her happiness and encouragement, and we also found confidence from them. Many of her potentials that surprised us were discovered and exercised a little.
During her eleven years of growing up, she participated in many school, provincial and national activities. At the age of three and a half, I took part in the happy family literature and art competition in the province, at the age of six, I took part in the handball competition on campus in the province, at the age of seven, I took part in the talent baby exhibition competition in the province at the age of nine, and at the age of ten, I took part in the learning speech competition in the province, as well as sports meetings, academic competitions, party hosting and student cadre elections. Every time, every activity, she played her strengths and advantages, and also made her aware of her own. More importantly, this rare opportunity allowed her to walk out of the small world of life and see the big world outside; Let her know many big friends and small partners; Let her experience the hardships of struggle and pursuit and the happiness of ultimate success in hard study and training.
Third, cultivate children's good character imperceptibly.
From the accumulation of ancient national culture, we have found the truth of "learning from time to time, standing on the ground and being virtuous". Therefore, while cultivating and developing children's abilities, we dare not ignore the cultivation of children's personality quality.
Most of the only children in this generation have implicit or explicit problems such as flamboyant personality and being bad at getting along with others. Although we earnestly persuade education, the effect is always unsatisfactory. Because they don't understand, but they can't do it. This inconsistency in knowledge, feelings, intentions and actions is precisely their age characteristics.
I remember my daughter just entered kindergarten and bit a little boy's finger for a small bench. I severely criticized her when I learned the situation. But she was very dissatisfied. Said: "the first bench is mine, and it is his fault that he robbed me;" Second, because he didn't give it back to me, I got angry and bit him. I saw him crying and said' I'm sorry' to him. "I didn't give her an expected judgment. Instead, I told her a story of "bad temper hurts people and hurts themselves". In order to let my young daughter know the true meaning of the story, I found wood, nails and hammers to perform the story with her, and let her experience the different feelings of hurting people and being hurt through empathy training. She finally realized her mistake and offered to visit the child who was bitten by her. Sincerely apologize to others. In this way, my daughter slowly learned to get along with others. Since then, she has become the most popular child on campus, and her friendliness, easygoing and enthusiasm have won her many good friends.
In fact, moral education is often done in details, just like "spring rain moistens everything".
Five years ago, my mother-in-law accidentally injured her lumbar spine and stayed in bed for more than two months. I cook and wash clothes after work every day, feed and bathe my mother-in-law, and wait on her to relieve herself ... Overwork induced my heart disease. One night, I helped my mother-in-law take a bath as usual, and fainted in the bathroom when I went to pour water. When my husband and daughter heard the sound, they ran over and saw that I was unconscious after breaking on the ground, and there was a lot of blood in my head, which frightened me. I was sent to first aid. When I woke up, I found my daughter standing in front of my bed in tears, holding my infusion hand carefully with her little hand. When I woke up, I said, "Mom, don't worry about grandma!" " You are not grandma's own. Let my aunt and them look after her. Otherwise, you will be exhausted. "I was very angry when I heard the news. Although my daughter knows how to take care of her mother, she is so cruel to others at an early age. I realized the blind spot of our past education and the urgency of filial piety education. I told her a lot that day. I told her: "Grandma gave birth to 13 children, including your father, and took care of them like a mother took care of you. It's hard for her mother to have only one of you. How hard it was for her during that time. Now that she is old and ill, how can she ignore her and not be filial to her ... "She finally realized her mistake and wanted to understand. From that day on, she combed her hair and gave it to her grandmother every day. Come back from school, move a small bench, sit in front of grandma's bed and talk to grandma.
We know that moral education can only be completed by infiltrating into the details of life, so we always communicate with her in a clever and sincere way under specific situations. She grew up healthily in a friendly and sincere environment. She was happily cared for by everyone, and gradually learned to care for others and cherish her feelings. Her classmate was ill and she took the initiative to send him to the school hospital. The teacher's voice was hoarse, and she quietly cleared her throat with pocket money; When her parents were ill, she offered tea. On March 8, Teachers' Day, she led the students to decorate the classroom, planned the class meeting, and gave each teacher a small gift made by the children themselves. ...
With the care of family, school and society, my daughter is growing up healthily and happily day by day. I firmly believe that she will follow her own life path and become a useful person to society. I firmly believe that today we give her a chance and tomorrow she will give us a wonderful one!
There is a saying that the stage is as big as the heart. Let's build a big stage for the child in the universe and let her dance out of her own life. Let's use the love of wise parents to support a bright sky for our child and let her spread her wings like a bird. (Jianghan Art Vocational College Lan)