The sales meeting will inspire jokes 1. Offline people never know how long online people have been waiting for her.
2. I saw an aunt burning paper that day, muttering: I bought it all when I received the fund ~ ~
3. If you ignore me, I will become a steamed stuffed bun? And it's the most famous in Tianjin? Hey hey?
4. Call in the new morning? Why do you sleep for a long time before you die? You will fall asleep after death.
5. Impulse means that you are still passionate about life, always impulsive, which means that you still don't understand life.
6. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time to see it.
7. Fate is responsible for shuffling cards, but it is ourselves who play cards!
8. Can you see the words I typed on the screen, but you can't see the tears I dropped on the keyboard?
9. In Africa, when the gazelle wakes up every morning, it knows that it must run faster than the fastest lion, or it will be eaten. When the lion wakes up every morning, he knows that he must catch up with the slowest gazelle, or he will starve to death. Whether you are a lion or a gazelle, you'd better start running when the sun rises.
10. Being busy is a kind of happiness, which makes us have no time to experience pain. Running around is a kind of happiness, which makes us truly feel life, and fatigue is a kind of enjoyment, which makes us have no time to be empty. May your life be colorful and happy forever!
1 1. Long ago, lies and truth bathed by the river. The lies were washed first, and they left in real clothes, but the truth refused to wear lies. Later, in people's eyes, only lies in real clothes are hard to accept the naked truth.
12. If I win10 million, I will buy a house and rent it to others, and collect the rent once a day. Wow, Kaka ~ ~ It's full!
13. urgent notice: please prepare a one-inch color photo, a copy of your ID card, a copy of your education and your resume and send them to the National Space Administration. According to reliable sources, in order to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival, we need to recruit Chang 'e! (Bring your own rabbit)
14. I can tolerate fake bodies, fake faces, fake breasts and fake hips! But I just can't stand that money is fake! !
15. Q: What do you like about me? A: I like you to stay away from me!
It is not the distant mountains that make you tired, but a grain of sand in your shoes.
Kill the panda and I will be a national treasure!
3. Ask what the world is like, but everything has its vanquisher!
We walk too fast for our souls to keep up?
5. The one riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be a Tang priest; Not necessarily an angel with wings, mom said. It's a bird man.
6. You know what, big brother? Second brother's meat is now more expensive than master's.
7. The tiger is not arrogant, you think I'm hellokitty! Xiao Lv is not arrogant. You think I'm Snoopy!
8. You all know my gender, my name, my age, my hobbies, needless to say, my specialty, eating!
9. I am a super networm in the universe. You are welcome to hit me, scold me, k me, kick me, hit me, even boil me, fry me, stew me, stew me, steam me, fuck me, boil me? I have no complaints, but the premise is that this person must be the most beautiful, lovely, beautiful, gentle, kind, virtuous and temperamental beauty in the world-XXX (XXX stands for girlfriend's name, which is very classic).
10. My nickname on the earth is Zhang Fei. My age is a secret. I guess my height and weight. I have many hobbies. I am not tall, short, thin, beautiful or ugly. Now living on the third planet earth in the four-dimensional space of the universe, the Milky Way and the solar system. Please give me more advice!
1 1. My name is Weibaba, I am 1.8, 28, my gender is not 38, and my annual salary is 48,000. The foundation of my house is being stripped, and I only need to support one father. I wonder who will marry?
12. Poor is ugly, 1.49 meters. Primary school culture, rural hukou. There are three broken houses and an acre of wasteland. Cold pot and hot stove, my wife didn't. All the year round, the medicine never leaves the mouth. Go online today and recruit a girlfriend. On the road of revolution, I will join hands shoulder to shoulder ~ ~
13. Good love makes you see the world through one person, while bad love makes you abandon the world for one person.
14. Fall, get up and cry ~ ~ ~
15. Making a mistake is a temporary regret, and missing it is a permanent regret!
Company morning meeting joke 1. Once I couldn't write multiple-choice questions in an exam. Like the male classmate next door asking for help, he quickly pointed out five female classmates, oh ... BBACD.
2. I:? Dude, where's your car? Can I borrow it? I took my girlfriend to do something. ? Buddy:? In the underground parking lot, there is not much oil. Remember to add it to me when you come back. ? Two hours later, I returned my car keys to my buddy. Buddy:? Did you fill me up with gas? Me:? No, I haven't started yet. ? I cut my girlfriend's messy hair and dragged her away.
3. There was a European and American classmate in the class who was a beautiful woman, so I went to chat up her and asked her which country she was from in broken English, and then she answered in broken Chinese. In your Chinese, I have never set it? I was cheated at that time. What can make the sun never set?
I managed to coax the goddess into opening a room. The goddess told me to wait for her, and she went to take a shower. Bored to look at the circle of friends, I saw the goddess saying in the circle of friends that I was so happy today. The goddess promised to accompany me to open a room and sent photos. I was dizzy at that time, fuck, if I had known she thought so, why did I bother to coax her? Should I leave or wait for her to come out of the shower in my room? Everybody tell me!
5. Go to the hospital for physical examination today. I met a buddy whose limbs were in plaster. Out of curiosity, I asked him what happened to you. He said helplessly that he was to blame for not drinking milk, but I asked him if he should drink milk. The elder brothers wronged that I have been drinking well, but I never expected Niu Yi's ass to sit down!
6. Will you miss me when I leave? Will you still smile when I leave? When I left, were you recalling the past? Will you cry when I leave? Will you say goodbye to me when I leave? The bleak autumn will bury my thoughts of you.
7. I don't know what it is, but it is deep. Hate is missing, smile and disappear. A person's happiest moment is to find the right person, the one who dotes on you, indulges your habits and loves everything about you. True compassion, without any constraints, is not only concerned, but also can lead the other side to bravely accept various experiences, let the other side fall, learn to be responsible for themselves and find their own way out.
8. This night, everything was calm. Gently turn on the gentle voice, let your heart indulge in music, and the music will slide across your chest like water. Every time, I dance with you in my heart. The music keeps repeating and I just want to dance with you until the end of time. At this time, no matter where you are. My heart will only hug you warmly until the end of my life.
9. Faith is not a storm in summer, which comes and goes quickly, but a smoky wind in spring, which never stops blowing to the earth. Faith is not a stormy wave, which rises and falls suddenly, but the waves whispering on the beach, which impact the land endlessly. Faith is not a colorful lantern on the long street, which lights up when it is turned on and dims when it is turned off, but a brilliant sunshine in the sky that never stops burning itself.
10. The most difficult thing to improve is height; The most difficult thing to change is the treatment. The most difficult thing to unify is caliber; The most difficult thing to serve is leadership. The most difficult thing to deal with is the relationship; The hardest thing to lose is weight. The most difficult thing to increase is income; The hardest thing to control is the mouth. The most difficult thing to suppress is the hatred of the rich; The most difficult thing to achieve is the ideal, and the most difficult thing to forget is the dream; The hardest thing to grasp is time.
1 1. Never expect to start a new life when everything is getting better, because life itself is the sum of good and bad. Every day in life may encounter unexpected adversity, and the good and the bad are mixed. The only thing we can do is to find a suitable way to live with a tough and positive attitude in all the unhappiness, disappointment and even cruelty.
12. The world is very complicated, but it is only the complexity of people's hearts; The world is ugly, but it is just sinister; The world is dark, but it's just a sly heart. Therefore, the mind is bodhi, an evil force. Everything comes from the heart, everything follows the heart, and everything is attached to the heart. Out of sight, out of mind. If you have a kind heart, you have nothing to worry about; If you are kind, there will be no hateful people; If the heart is simple, the world is empty.
13. Time can make deep things deeper and deeper, and it can also make shallow things shallower and shallower. It is a positive attitude to live by people's efforts. Contentment is also a lot of things. Don't wait to lose them before you know how to cherish them in endless loneliness. Until then, even if I understand, I can't get back everything I can lose.
14. Life is a ship. It doesn't care about the starting point, only about the direction. It matters not what someone is born but what they grow to be. As long as they set their goals, choose the right direction, work hard to be an oar and an ideal sail, they will certainly be able to gallop successfully on the road of life.
15. Life is a ship, carrying all our ideals and hopes. Without the help of the wave of our efforts, it will turn your life into a bubble and bury it mercilessly!
16. Struggle is pulp, pulp is the power of the ship, and struggle is the strength of people. Only with the strength of heart and soul can our goal in life be closer and closer, and it is no longer a distant hope!
17. Life is the sea, with high tides and low tides. When the tide is high, the waves are rough, which makes you proud, but remember to look back and remember your starting point. When the tide ebbs, you are crying, don't remember, don't be sad, life will always return to the starting point.
18. On the weekend of 9 to 5, white-collar workers are very proud; Suit, wallet and computer, petty bourgeoisie life is very enjoyable; Everyone knows the surface, but no one knows the bitterness behind it; Do things insensitive, when the day!
19. Cooking? Success? Secret recipe: want it? Experience? For recipes, put? Ambition? Release? Work hard? In the pot, with? Tough? Stew on low heat, add? Judge? Make seasoning and use it? Perseverance? As a good friend, you will succeed!
Mustard head is the root of mustard used in Cruciferae millet and is a famous vegetable in China. So, can I eat it raw?
You can eat it raw, but before you e