Real matching is not limited to external conditions such as family economic strength and education level. The most important thing is that both husband and wife have similar views and beliefs about the concept of marriage, which is the foundation of happiness.

Therefore, the author strongly advocates that quarreling every day after marriage is not as good as fully understanding and running in before marriage. Only by really getting along with each other with your heart and taking the time to get to know each other better will you know whether they are suitable for you. The consistency of marriage beliefs requires us to constantly influence each other. Although this process is painful, it needs encouragement.

It is not comprehensive enough to define a suitable match with money. A person's wealth will never be fixed at a certain moment. It is a natural law to gain and lose. It is often seen that some parents put each other's "economic strength" in the first place for their children's marriage, and decide their children's marital happiness by the amount of money.

Money can really affect a part of marriage, but it can never lead the direction of marriage.

Compared with material matching, spiritual matching is the premise of soul matching, because countless practical examples tell us that those couples who can finally stick to the last marriage can resist material lack, and those couples who lose to reality are mostly because their emotional worlds do not intersect.

Returning to marriage simply means getting married because of love, paying for marriage with the intention of collecting money, and finally losing to marriage. Marriage can be a paradise of love or a grave of love. The key lies in how you define marriage and how to understand the "right match" before marriage.

Zou Hao, 24, and Xiaoling broke up after falling in love for two years. Talking about this relationship is really annoying.

Xiaoling and Zou Hao used to be college classmates. In the year of graduation, there were 30 students in the class. They stay in the same city, because their feelings gradually get to know each other, until they have a good impression and determine the relationship between men and women. Xiaoling is a cheerful woman because she majored in mechanical design in college. At that time, there were only two girls in the class, so Xiaoling was favored by many opposite sex, which laid a curse for Zou Hao and Xiaoling's feelings.

From graduation to work, they are gradually baptized by social reality. Like young men and women, they long for a happy marriage and a warm family. Zou Hao is no exception. Two years after graduation, he worked hard and finally took the post of supervisor. His job is stable and his salary is rising. Because of work, Zou Hao and Xiaoling have been long-distance lovers for a year, and they only meet once every two months. The family was not at ease and urged them to get married quickly many times.

Xiaoling's family is rural, and her parents have been farmers for generations. She hasn't seen much of the world, so she hopes her daughter can marry a good family. A college student like Xiaoling came out of the village. Her parents don't know how smart they are. They flatter everyone. My daughter is a white-collar worker in the city, and my future son-in-law is a company director.

Therefore, Xiaoling's mother is very much in favor of such a marriage. As long as the bride price is 60 thousand, she was originally engaged during the eleventh period this year and plans to get married at the end of this year. It wasn't long before the engagement unexpectedly appeared.

College students all know that Xiaoling is going to marry Zou Hao. The night Zou Hao learned of the wedding news, a male classmate in the group sent such a message.

"Have a bowl and look at the pot, and give it back to me quickly. I don't want to raise a wife for others! "

After this message was sent, Zou Hao felt that Xiaoling must have something to hide from him. After all, we are all classmates, and no one will ruin other people's marriages regardless of their feelings, unless there is something that really touches the bottom line.

Under Zou Hao's repeated questioning, Xiaoling told the truth. Indeed, in the year when they were in a different place, Xiaoling often accepted gifts from another male classmate, ate together, and often gave expensive gifts. Xiaoling, who refused, didn't understand this ambiguity and deeply hurt Zou Hao. She just thinks that one more man is good to her, which is her charm.

Seeing that Xiaoling was getting married, another male student was unwilling and simply asked for compensation in the group. Although this is really inappropriate, flies don't bite seamless eggs. If Xiaoling really knows how to love herself, will others do it?

Marriage and love, too, need to be single-minded and loyal. If you can't completely hold a person in your heart, then don't start a relationship easily. Feelings that are not firm enough are betrayal, because no man can accept sharing you with another man. If you love, you should love deeply. If you don't love, you shouldn't hurt. The result of kicking two boats is doomed to give up on yourself.

Zou Hao broke up in front of Xiaoling and paid the bride price. The relationship between the two families was frozen to freezing point.

What is even more ridiculous is that Xiaoling's mother feels sorry for her daughter and thinks that her daughter is right. Before she gets married, she can accept anyone's favor. In her mother's eyes, her daughter is always the best. This kind of psychology is understandable. But we should understand that a mother doesn't know right from wrong in her emotional view, but helps others abuse her. This is not to protect her, but to ruin the happiness of her life. A mother's words and deeds have a great influence on her children.

Xiaoling's mother came to Zou Hao's house and said on the spot, "My daughter earns 5,000 yuan a month, and whoever she marries will climb high. As far as your family is concerned, we are not married yet! "

Zou Hao smiled and immediately replied: "I won't marry, break off my marriage!" " "

Zou Hao didn't want to suffer, so he was anxious to get rid of the marriage. Maybe some readers will accuse him. A man has no courage to get married. What I want to say is that losing money is not a blessing. If losing money is really so good, how many people in the world are willing to lose money? Loss is only a result, not a reason to bring us good news. If you have considered and accepted the degree of loss, you can learn from it, avoid being hurt again and promote your growth and maturity, then you can choose to lose, otherwise don't lose.

In love, no matter men or women, don't let yourself be humble, don't wronged yourself, and don't be a good person. People who love to take advantage will only hurt you again. If you lose money, you must talk about the bottom line, otherwise you will lose a lot. If you are very firm about your bottom line, you need to prove to others with actions where your bottom line is.

Obviously, Zou Hao's bottom line is that he can't accept a woman who changes her mind. At the same time, this may be the bottom line for every man.

Xiaoling's family didn't feel wrong. Zou Hao's heart has long been sick because of her arbitrariness and frivolity. Everyone has different views on marriage, and we can't judge their feelings by right or wrong. At least we can understand that Zou Hao and Xiaoling are indeed wrong in their views on marriage.

As a woman, I advise you not to compromise your inner feelings easily. Necessary reserve is the first step to win the respect of others. Men often don't cherish the feelings at their fingertips, especially between the opposite sex. There is no simple relationship between men and women. All men who seek love in the name of friends must have a purpose.

Today's discussion: Do you think Zou Hao is making a mountain out of a molehill or excusable?