We in China have regarded funeral as a family event since ancient times. "Funeral Etiquette" had begun to take shape in the Zhou Dynasty. After more than two thousand years' development and evolution, a series of huge and complicated rituals were formed. Funeral reflects people's understanding and attitude towards death, and also reflects the psychological characteristics of national culture.
Located in the rural area at the junction of the Yellow River and Fenhe River in the south of Shanxi (I checked the map, it should be Hejin area in Yumenkou), the rural funeral here was very particular about more than ten years ago, and the style was quite "antique".
(The family of the deceased is crying in the cemetery)
Including the places I mentioned above, the vast rural areas have the following "taboos" about the death of the elderly:
First, choose "the land of feng shui" and "choose auspicious burial".
According to the custom of Sichuan, teachers of yin and yang should be invited. It won't cost much. I chose the location of bone colonization and burial for my late father, and both adopted the "meridian direction". This can be determined by a compass or a mobile phone.
The geomantic omen of Yin House has been passed down for thousands of years and has a long history, which is particularly important in a "void legal world". I hope to deal with it seriously and not rashly.
(located in the cemetery of a city)
Second, ancestors died, taboo "hot dead hot burial".
Should be properly buried within 12 hours to 72 hours. Of course, special circumstances are not in this case.
After the death of the ancestors, it is recommended not to put them into the "ice coffin" immediately, unless it is a special case, because the deceased ancestors belong to the "yin body stage" at this time, and some thinking consciousness still exists. Putting the body into the ice coffin rashly will easily lead the ancestors to fall into the ice hell and the hungry ghost road.
Third, it is advisable to "bury in the ground" as soon as possible after the death of ancestors.
In my opinion, we should abide by the local "public order and good customs", that is, "buried in the ground", and at the same time we can reduce some expenses and energy.
Fourth, when moving a corpse (for example, from a hospital to a morgue), it is necessary to use an "umbrella", and in some places, it is necessary to "call the mountains to evoke spirits".
Don't let the sun shine directly on the remains or ashes of ancestors. Later generations should use umbrellas or sheds to shade themselves.
"Calling the Mountain to Evoke the Soul" means that future generations should call their ancestors' names and birthdays before burial to help them "return with their souls".
Fifth, the tomb is a "warm pit".
Be sure to warm the grave, don't be cold, and don't be seen by sunlight, moonlight and starlight. After digging the grave, the paper money must be burned in the hole, and it can only be buried after it is burned. The sun, moon and stars should be covered with sheds or umbrellas above the graves.
(Hair accessories for filial daughter's funeral in rural areas of southern Shanxi)
6. Before the ancestors were buried, there were no footprints, handprints or figures. The living can stay in the grave. If you leave it carelessly, you can use paper money to smooth the trace and bury it.
Seven, in the burial place, pregnant women, maternity, zodiac prisoners must avoid evil spirits. Specifically, it is the same as the zodiac of the late ancestors.
Eight, after burying the ancestors, everyone should not look back when they go home, so as not to see something they shouldn't see. Especially the infirm, or the offspring with supernatural constitution.
After burying your ancestors and returning home, you must wash your hands, look in the mirror and remove the filth.
In rural Sichuan, a few cypress trees were folded on the mountain and put on the way home. When white smoke comes out, they go through the back to eliminate the smell of the cemetery. (But remember to manage the fire source and bury it with water or soil after use. You can't leave until there is no Mars. )
The simple answer about (funeral) custom is as follows:
Take the rural areas at the intersection of the Yellow River and Fenhe River in southern Shanxi as an example.
Their funeral etiquette can be roughly divided into "small mourning", "mourning", "coffin sealing", wake, incense burning, mourning, mourning and burial.
In the past, the whole funeral process was solemn and grand.
We should see that in the process of funeral, the shadow of culture is immersed in it. Funeral is not formed independently, but the product of multi-cultural integration.
Jinnan area is one of the cradles of Chinese civilization, and there may still be some funeral etiquette culture. For example, during the mourning period, the local people will perform "castanets".
Concluding remarks
Funeral customs vary from place to place. What are the manners in your hometown? If you have different opinions, please give us your advice!
Taboo of rural elderly after death;
You can't say dead. People in their seventies and eighties say "old", while younger people say "gone".
Children can't get a haircut for 0/00 days/kloc, and they can't get a haircut until 0/00 days/kloc.
On the first day of the first year of death, you can't make a phone call on the first day of New Year's Day, otherwise it will make people unhappy and feel unlucky.
You can't post couplets in the first year of Chinese New Year, blue couplets in the second year and red couplets in the third year.
The custom of the old man after his death:
To "lead the way" in the shortest time is to tie a pony-shaped "Roman" with straw, put a coat on it and walk to the intersection outside the gate. The eldest son stood on a high stool with a sorghum orange in his hand, facing southwest. Sorghum orange pointed to the southwest and shouted: (Mom or Dad) shout three times to the southwest, and other children followed suit. Then the eldest son jumped down from the stool, and at the same time, the stool fell to the ground with his hoof. All the children knelt down and kowtowed. Undertaker burned the "Son of Rome" and the children went home crying. The ceremony of "leading the way" is over.
The next day, the second day, the married daughter cried all the way home, kowtowed to her mother-in-law, and called "Xie" to give her parents a "crying road" to make the old man go to the underworld smoothly.
The next day, I sent the "river water" three times in the morning, noon and evening, that is, I went to the intersection of the village head to burn paper and pour soup for the terrifying, hoping to let the old people pass. When you burn a girl at night, burn a paper horse and let the old man ride to the Buddhist temple or the old mother temple in the west, which is called "hair travelling expenses".
On the third day of the funeral, at noon, the old man's daughter, daughter-in-law and niece will go to the grave to "pancake", which is to heat the grave so as not to make the old man feel cold when he goes to his "new home". Before the funeral, the children will accompany the old man to have the last reunion dinner in front of the coffin, and the affection of life will be over.
On the third day after burial, the grave was rounded early in the morning, burned at noon, and died on May 7th, Hundred Days.
Nowadays, young people are more and more unfamiliar with these customs.
In rural areas, sacrifice is much more exquisite than in cities. At the funeral scene, you can't joke about wearing red and green, especially the younger generation should abide by this way of sacrifice. Those who come to pay their respects should bow and kowtow in return. There are younger generations waiting in front of Peng Ling. When they come to pay their respects, they should kowtow to meet them. Then when others pay New Year greetings, they should kneel on both sides to express their thanks. Now in the city, there are many rules, and they are not as particular as before. The rules of funeral also change with different owners.
In fact, after a person dies, no matter how rich the funeral is, in fact, the deceased doesn't know, just watching the lively living, how filial our family is, how grand we are when the old man dies, competing with each other and playing the trumpet on the stage. In fact, I think we should give him a good burial, feed him well and dress warmly when he is alive. Spend12 million on the dead is a kind of enjoyment.
We old people are not allowed to eat noodles and vermicelli when they die, saying that eating these things is constantly linked with the dead, which is not good for the living and is afraid of being taken away by the dead. When eating, you can't fold plates and bowls. It is unscientific to say that there is a funeral when the vegetables are piled up. Just for good luck. In short, many taboos hope that such things will not happen to your family, which means that everyone in the family is healthy and happy and everyone can live a long life.
After all, every family's funeral service is different, and every taboo is to be kind to the living. Nowadays, there are fewer and fewer superstitious things in this society, and everyone knows that no matter what others do, they are right.
First of all, I'm glad to answer your question. Generally speaking, whether it is a happy event, the death of an old man or the birth of a child, there are many details to pay attention to. For example, the old man at home died.
taboo
First, if the old man dies, children and relatives should not visit after the funeral, because others will be taboo.
Second, when the old man dies, children are forbidden to wear bright clothes.
Third, you can't post couplets for three years. You can't get up early in the new year.
custom
First, after the death of the old man, the daughter will go back to her husband's house and ask for filial piety. No matter the elders or children, they will kowtow when they don't talk.
Second, the old man died and it took three days to walk around the grave.
Third, five or seven days, one hundred days, one year, two years and three years after death, we should pay homage. I go to the grave to deliver meals every New Year's Eve.
"Leading the sheep" is a way for Gansu people to worship their ancestors, and it is the most mysterious ceremony in all kinds of sacrificial activities.
At the beginning of the sacrifice, music is played, and the children or nephews of the deceased and other younger generations present a live sheep (which the locals think is clean), pull it to the coffin, and sprinkle wine on the ears, nose, tail, hooves and other parts of the sheep as a memorial. There is a folk saying that sheep are connected with yin and yang at the moment. It seems that the sheep at this time were endowed with some kind of divinity. On this occasion, the sheep becomes an accessory to the soul of the deceased, and its behavior represents the wishes of the deceased.
It is said that if the old man is satisfied with the person who offered the sheep, or walks peacefully and safely, the sheep will shake all over and have fluffy hair in a very short time, indicating that the deceased has been recognized. If not, the deacon will catch the sheep, pour some cold water into the ears and sprinkle cold water on the sheep's back. Once released, if the sheep shudders on the spot, it is called a big fur collar, and the sheep is accepted by the victims of the sacrifice. Generally speaking, the order of leaders is pecking order.
The ceremony of "leading the sheep" is solemn, solemn and simple, which can not only make the funeral more stable, but also reveal the filial piety complex of children and grandchildren. So "leading the sheep" is the "highlight" of the funeral.
"Leading the sheep" is usually carried out the day before the burial of the deceased, when relatives and friends gather completely. The filial son or daughter of the deceased or his parents offered sheep to the deceased. When leading the sheep, the filial sons and clans of the deceased will gather around the ram in front of the mourning hall and tell the unfinished words of the deceased in their own words. If the sheep shakes its ears and shakes its body, it is considered that the deceased "led away" the sheep. The chosen person presided over the ceremony of "leading the sheep".
At the beginning of the sacrifice, the children or nephews of the deceased and other younger generations will present a live sheep (which the local people think is clean), pull the sheep to the coffin, and sprinkle wine on the ears, nose, tail, hooves and other parts of the sheep as a memorial. There is a folk saying that the sheep at this time are connected with yin and yang, and the sheep at this time are endowed with certain divinity.
At this time, the dedicated live sheep became the attachment of the dead soul, and its every move represented the will of the dead.
Folk believe that sheep represent the soul of the deceased. Carl said something to reassure the deceased, such as that the family and children and grandchildren are all well, and there will be no difficulties in the future, so don't worry.
If the sheep still don't lead, the person in charge of "leading the sheep" will catch the sheep, pour some cold water into the sheep's ears or sprinkle some cold water on the sheep's back. If there is a great thrill when herding sheep, it is called opening the collar, so that the sheep will be accepted by the victims of sacrifice.
This custom has been followed in Gansu for a long time, and this ceremony is called "leading the sheep". "Leading sheep" is for guests to eat. Doing things is tradition, and eating is courtesy. Invite others to eat their seats in order to deal with things, and eat other people's seats in order to have something to eat for themselves and others in the future. Many times, some "things" are necessary, but some "seats" are necessary to eat. According to the old people, this is a "countdown".
No one can say when the custom of "leading sheep" originated, but it can play a certain role in education and warning to the traditional ancient theory of "respecting the elderly and filial piety". Some educational and cultural connotations fully show that people's wealth and civilization are constantly improving.
In northern Anhui, no matter whose old man is dead, we can't say who is dead, only who is old; Younger people say who left, left early, and so on. Like our hometown, after people die, the funeral is the third day. During this time, the dutiful son can't go to other people's homes; You can't just borrow things, you have to buy them with money, or 30 or 20 cents, whatever you want.
The clothes worn by the deceased before his death, except a few as souvenirs, should be burned; The bed you slept in should be soaked in the ditch and pond for a period of time to get rid of the bad luck. We only entertain guests when we burn five or seven sheets of paper, only five or seven sheets of paper are burned, and the other seven sheets are not. Guests are usually close relatives, such as married daughters, nieces and nephews. No one else needs to come. People who come to burn May 7th paper are not allowed to give gifts, but only bring food, drinks, paper cannons and the like. Everyone has eaten at noon and will go to the cemetery to kowtow in the afternoon. Burning anniversary paper is the same as burning five or seven pieces of paper. The average person is dead, so we can't say that he is dead, only that he is old. Don't touch people for eight to twelve hours after death, or the dead will be very painful. It is said that it is because the soul of the deceased is out of the body at this time, and there is the pain of peeling the old cow. A light touch will make people suffer greatly. Twelve hours later, the coffin can't be buried immediately, and it has to stop in Westinghouse for seven days. This is the so-called top seven. You can't talk loudly for the first seven days, and you can't go out at night, because the dead will come back for the last time for fear of disturbing them. After the first seven days, you can be buried, and you have to burn incense paper horses. Some families have many children and grandchildren and have to take the altar to the cemetery.
After the paper horse burned in the cemetery, put a willow or cypress tree in front of the grave for peace of mind. The so-called cemetery is actually in the crop field. A bunch of small mounds are connected together, all of which are ancestral graves. Every year, in Tomb-Sweeping Day, Mid-Autumn Festival, memorial day and winter solstice, you should visit the grave. After burning the paper, take a piece of paper and press it on the grave with earth, otherwise it will not be found in a few years. Generally speaking, the scale of going to the grave from the first year to the third year of death is very large, especially in the third year. You can burn some paper every year after that. Don't touch it for eight to twelve hours after death, otherwise the deceased will be very painful. It is said that it is because the soul of the deceased is out of the body at this time, and there is the pain of peeling the old cow. A light touch will make people suffer greatly. Twelve hours later, the coffin can't be buried immediately, and it has to stop in Westinghouse for seven days. This is the so-called top seven.
You can't talk loudly for the first seven days, and you can't go out at night, because the dead will come back for the last time for fear of disturbing them. After the first seven days, you can be buried, and you have to burn incense paper horses. Some families have many children and grandchildren and have to take the altar to the cemetery. After the paper horse burned in the cemetery, put a willow or cypress tree in front of the grave for peace of mind. The so-called cemetery is actually in the crop field. A bunch of small mounds are connected together, all of which are ancestral graves. Every year, in Tomb-Sweeping Day, Mid-Autumn Festival, memorial day and winter solstice, you should visit the grave. After burning the paper, you should take a piece of paper and press it on the grave with earth, otherwise it will be a few years later.
In rural areas, after the death of the elderly, it is forbidden for family members to wear red and green, and they must mourn for three years before they can post Spring Festival couplets. In the first year of his death, his family was not allowed to go out to pay New Year greetings. There is another kind of marriage that cannot be held until three years later. Here, it's like this. Maybe other places are more complicated.
By analogy, * * * has seven July 7th anniversaries. The time of soul night is from midnight to midnight of the first seven days.
First, the first seven ghost nights were the first time that the deceased returned to Yang to visit his six relatives and their families after his death. The memorial day of July 7th is the period when the deceased was in the Yin, and the consciousness of the deceased has not been completely cut off. A little explanation in local dialect is that the deceased didn't know he was dead, not a so-called ghost. Therefore, the first notice of this night of seven souls returning to their hometown is that the families of the deceased must remember their ancestors on this day, and they cannot refuse to leave because of family chores that make the deceased feel sad and sorry.
Second, on the seventh day of the lunar new year, there will be a cow's head and horse's face, two ghosts and four ghost soldiers to escort the souls of the deceased and send them back to their lost homes. Seven days ago, I entered the house from windows, chimneys, etc. On the same day, he walked out of the door. Descendants in the family can place tributes at home for the first seven days. Beef, horse meat and dog meat should be forbidden in the tribute, and the richer the meat, the better, so as to reward the four ghosts and make it difficult to crush them to death. At the same time, the food that ancestors liked to eat before their death can also be put in tributes and eaten on the road.
Third, at the same time, on the seventh day of the first week, a bowl of water and a bowl of food should be placed at the entrance of filial piety. Putting clear water means that ancestors can wash away dust, avoid disasters and go on their way with peace of mind; Putting coarse grains means avoiding suffocation, preventing criminals from crying and driving away evil spirits and mildew. This bowl of clear water and a bowl of grain can be directly sprinkled at the door the next morning, and the grain can be thrown into the long running water on the same day. On the night of the first seven days, the tributes removed from Shihai, together with burning paper and silver tickets, can be burned at the crossroads and fasted.
Fourthly, in Shaman Xianmen, ancestors are not allowed to go to the cemetery to offer sacrifices on the seventh day, because the ancestors of various temples will officially record the magnetic field of the deceased's yin house on this day and come to inspect it. At the same time, it is also the time for the evil spirits to catch their bodies. Therefore, on the seventh day, I will go to the cemetery to offer sacrifices. On the one hand, it will make the temple gods and the deceased lust after the world of mortals, and on the other hand, it will bring bad luck to the living, and on the other hand, it will easily collide with the evil spirits who exhale. On the seventh day of the first week, if it is not convenient for future generations to present their confessions at home, they should also burn paper to worship their ancestors that night.
Fifth, in the first seven ghost nights, if there are people with confinement and four eyes at home, they should avoid them to avoid colliding with the dead and various yin soldiers. For those who die suddenly and unexpectedly, they will report their dreams to their relatives in the first seven days. Don't panic if your family dreams or sees it at home. Quietly ask the dead, help them properly handle the unfinished business, and let them rest assured to go west, Guangming Avenue and Yaochi Road. After the first seven days, the ancestors will go to Wangxiangtai and start the road of sweeping graves, which will never return.
The question may be what taboos and customs are there when organizing funerals for the elderly. As the saying goes, one mile is different from the wind, and ten miles is different from the customs. China has a vast territory and many nationalities, and the funeral customs in different places have their own differences and characteristics.
A poor scholar, Dictyophora rarely goes out, so she doesn't know much about other places and only knows a little about the local funeral culture. Now let's come together. If you have different opinions, please give me more advice. Thanks in advance!
Let's talk about the mourning period first! In layman's terms, mourning is also a time for mourning. After an old man dies, he usually stays in the morgue for three days. If a close relative can't come back in time in other places, he will have a few more days to see the old man for the last time. The funeral period is calculated as follows: one day from the date of death, and then the funeral will be held the next day and the third day. There have been many things in these three days. On the first day at home, you should inform your friends and relatives to burn paper one by one; Funeral supplies; Ask the chef who caters in the countryside; Wait a minute. The next morning, there was generally nothing important, and a Peng Ling was built. Here comes the cook; If the troupe is invited, the troupe will also come; Letters from the old man's daughter, niece, nephew and many other relatives and friends have arrived. In order not to be too busy on the day of the funeral, most families will cremate the dead the next afternoon. When you come back from cremation, it will be dark soon, and the deacon general manager will arrange to pour the soup.
On the third morning, there will be a funeral, or a cemetery or cemetery. When he comes back from burial, the host family will entertain guests who come to burn paper for condolences. During the dinner, the dutiful son will kowtow and thank everyone. This is called "dutiful son"! The funeral is over.
The fourth day is the day of burning five or seven pieces of paper. It is said that the burning of May 7th paper should be during the May 7th period, but because everyone is very busy, some of them are still working in other places, so we should hurry back. From this point of view, no matter who does things, it is to adapt to the situation and change the date. In recent years, the convention seems to have become very common, and everyone has done so.
Let's talk about what's taboo! After all, it is a white matter, and there are many taboos. Taboo, also known as taboo, is something you can't do during a funeral. Just give one or two examples. You can't borrow anything used for funeral, even a two-fingered rope. You can only buy it, no matter who it is, as long as it's not the owner's own. Give me 32 cents, not for nothing. During the mourning period, the dutiful son and his wife can't visit, but they should always be in front of the spirit, and what needs to be done should be arranged by the deacon. Wait a minute.
This has a lot to do with local customs, and the difference should be great. With the changes of the times, some customs have gradually faded or even changed.
Let me briefly say where I am:
1. Take Spring Festival couplets as an example. When the old man died, he posted white couplets in the first year, yellow couplets in the second year and green couplets in the third year. It will turn normal red in three years.
Many rural areas are buried underground. If one of the old couple dies first, they can't enter the ancestral grave. Only when the other spouse dies can he or she be thrown out and buried together.
After the old man dies, he will burn some bedding and clothes before his death.
4. In order to commemorate the elderly, future generations will choose: seventh day, centenary, memorial day, Qingming ... these days, they burn paper and pay tribute.
On the day when the old man is buried, the host will prepare an iron bucket, sprinkle plant ash under the bucket and put a noodle cutter on the bucket. When every buried old man comes back, he will turn the chopping knife (positive and negative). When everyone comes back, they will open the iron drum to see what traces are on the plant ash. It is said that they can know what feathers their old people have.
I won't talk about many details. Some people may say that these are superstitions, but we in China pay attention to filial piety. This is our belief. It entrusts our deep sorrow for our ancestors.