My uncle became fierce when he cut his hair because he became a vulture.
Grandma's doorknob is very thick, and the door opens noisily. I didn't know until I asked later. This is called being careless.
4. Suddenly Guo, the agent, called his wife kidney calculi: Stone in winter. His wife was shocked: look at the sea?
One day, the bear planted a strawberry and mango and found that the strawberry grew so slowly. The bear said, you can't be a berry, you can't be a berry. Did you hear that? No, you can't.
6. In the zoo, the tiger gave the lion green. The lion was angry and the tiger felt innocent. When the breeder asked, he found that the tiger had a lawyer qualification certificate.
7. It is said that when Lu Da hung upside down and hung the willow, the flowers next to him closed their eyes in fear. When others called him, the flowers closed.
8. Xiao Ming quarreled with his mother, and Xiao Ming made a dash for the door, so Xiao Ming's house had no door.
9. I understand the truth that people who are ugly should read more books. In the past, people said that I was not the material for reading, but I was praising my beauty.
10. Get off the road. Kay's dad is in the tower. Leave this tower! What, her? Beware of falling from the tower. Can't let go.
1 1. In the dead of night, I always want to ask myself how I made mistakes in my studies and feelings.
12. Deer can never take pictures of rabbits. Deer make rabbits jump. You are too short. The rabbit is crying. I am not short. I don't love it at all.
13. Zhang Fei escorted Liu Bei back to Jingzhou. Unexpectedly, he was ambushed by Cao Cao's army on the way. Liu Bei fled hastily, and Lu Yu fell off a cliff. Zhang Fei shouted, master, stop your horse quickly! Liu Bei: I am very happy with your mother!
14. I am easy to get along with, and I can find my own reasons if I don't get along well.
15. I have to rely on threats for everything a good-looking and attractive girl can do.
16. Job's tears do things with Job's tears, while Ding Xiao does things with jingle.
17. You didn't even hurt me. What did you hurt? Tengger singer singer?
18. I said I liked Li Bai's poems better. Lu You was so angry that our family couldn't get online.
19. Xu Xian bought a hat for his wife. Why does the white snake feel particularly heavy after wearing it? Because it's a hat!
20. Mother sparrow combs her hair and asks her what hairstyle she wants. The little sparrow said, choo choo
2 1. Just now, I met a foreigner who speaks English fluently. I asked him if his pronunciation was English or American, and he said that he really wanted to go out and watch electronic music!
22. Don't come to me when you are in love. What are you talking about? Tell me about crow's feet.
23. I just ate a bad watermelon and my stomach hurts. Went to the hospital, just tasted the department.
Humor homophonic terrier necessary funny king (Part II) 24. Mom asked me to rub clothes, and I said I did, did you hear me? Missed it!
25. Do you know why Beijingers don't say homophonic terriers? Because old Beijing is not harmonious.
26. Even I don't want it, so what do you want, a meal?
27. Beautiful women's rooms are generally messy. After all, she is a beauty in a messy room.
28. The song that fried eggs sing for poached eggs "This is a little love song of fried eggs ~"
29. Alice was ill, so I played "Treat Alice".
30. Even I don't love it. Do you love Qiyi?
3 1. I am a diet pill. I can make people lose weight. I don't care about medicine. I don't care about medicine.
32. The light next to the bedroom at home flashed that day and I called the maintenance master. What questions did the master ask? I said, "The light next to the bedroom is too flashing." He said, "Catch the vine of love?"
33. 1, No.2, No.3, No.4 and No.5 stood five enemies. My bodyguard said to me, "Please ask my master to tell me how many times to call."
The doctor prescribed me some pills, and I accidentally knocked over the bottle, and the pills rolled out, screaming that they were good pills.
On the way home, someone sells spices. I bought a bag for cooking. After eating, my eyes filled with tears. It turns out that this is "expected."
36. Want Want Snow Cake What do you think it will become when it is hot?
38. Am I short, short, short or short? Did you hear that? Still love.
39. If I call a toad Chuchu, is it cute? I call the coyote a wolf, and only Gina thinks it's cute.
40. Girls should do something bad, and then God will send you a boy when he gets angry.
4 1. Yun-peng Yue's son asked Yun-peng Yue: Dad, what do you mean by eager to try? Yun-peng Yue replied, "That's where Dad takes a bath!" !
42. I went to buy oysters On the way home, all the oysters jumped out of the bag and got into the mud. It turns out that oysters like mud!
43. "Why do you often feel dizzy when riding?" "That's because you didn't recite the multiplication formula."
44. Nezha asked Wukong, "Demon, dare you!" Wukong: "Love me like … like you said?"
45. Why are there pianos and mailboxes in the room in horror movies? How many medicine boxes does Qin Gang live in, and how many demons live in them?
46. You seem to have gained weight. I can lose weight with you. Let's give up meat (get married) tomorrow!
Humorous homophonic jokes
Humorous homophonic jokes (1) 1. Some frogs will touch your stomach, because Conan said that all frogs of the mind have been touching your stomach.
Xiaoming didn't feel well and went to see a doctor. After diagnosis, the doctor said his throat was "inflamed" and he said "hi".
Yongqi helped the grandmother to bathe and even pulled out the grandmother mud.
4. I asked my friend in Chengdu why he loves to wear Rei Kawakubo so much, and he said, it's because if you wear it for a long time, you can keep it zero.
Be sure to eat midnight snack before going to bed, so as not to have hungry dreams.
6. I am a little sheep. I sheared the wool once today and it fell off.
7. Zhang Fei and Guan Yu rode together, with a cliff in front. Guan Yu said, "Stop your horse." Zhang Fei said, "I'm happy." Guan Yu said, "Stop your horse."
8. Look, I have two erasers here. You don't know, do you? Why? Because you have no object (oak).
9. One day, the duckling was reading a book. Mother duck said to close the book after dinner. Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off. Did you hear that? Make up.
10. The dragon thanked the crab for cooking it, and it was kindness for the crab to cook the dragon.
1 1. I accidentally trampled an ant to death, and the little ant said unjustly, that's the queen, meowed, we don't have a queen.
12. When you touch the scene, you occupy the word "touching the scene".
13. Even I don't love it. What do you love about Qiyi?
14. I won't say anything beautiful, but I said beautiful.
15. Even I didn't coax. Hong Shixian, what are you kidding?
16. Okay, bad, whatever. Three people are good friends. One day, well, go out with something bad. If it's bad, call something, say who it is, and if it's bad, say, let's make up.
17. Even I don't cherish it. What do you cherish? Biography?
18. Zhang Fei escorted Liu Bei back to Jingzhou. Unexpectedly, he was ambushed by Cao Cao's army on the way. Liu Bei fled hastily, and Lu Yu fell off a cliff. Zhang Fei shouted, master, stop your horse quickly! Liu Bei: I am very happy with your mother!
19. "A piece of glass is ready to jump off a building. Guess what it will say? " "What?" "Good night, I'm broken."
20. I have a great job. What? Digging the lotus root
Humorous homophonic jokes (part two) 2 1. A Japanese man came to China to see a dentist, and they got into a fight. When the police asked, they knew that the dentist and the Japanese had said "pull out a tooth."
22. You didn't even hurt me. What did you hurt? Tengger singer singer?
23. Guo suddenly called the agent of his wife with kidney calculi: Yudong Stone. His wife was shocked: look at the sea?
24. One day, the bear planted a strawberry and mango and found that the strawberry grew so slowly. The bear said, you can't be a berry, you can't be a berry. Did you hear that? No, you can't.
25. What's good about men being lewd? Okay, what about you?
26. Once upon a time, an illiterate was walking. He suddenly became literate when he was walking. It turned out that he came to a crossroads.
27. Girls who love to laugh can't be bad. Why are they so happy?
28. One day, the bear bought an ice cream. The sun is like fire, and the ice cream melts to the ground. The bear said, "It looks like mud. It looks like mud." Did you hear that? I miss you so much.
29. A quail was late for the dance, and everyone called him ~ Late Quail.
30. We can't feel the pulse of the times by ourselves, nor can we let your mother feel a blog. I wanted to give my life a try all day, so I turned around and asked your mother to give it a try. "
3 1. One day, the pig and the little leopard went to eat. The boss said, what do you want to eat? The pig said, give me some pig food. The boss said, ok, a pig food. What do you want, little leopard? The little leopard said: leopard food. The boss said: Beijing time is eight o'clock sharp.
I haven't washed my hair at home for four days. I turned out to be sexy and oily.
33. It's 36 degrees hot today. I went to buy two ice creams, one for you and one for me, and then we cooled off the heat. Did you hear that? It's over.
34. Neighbors sing KTV at home. I heard a loud voice, so I asked what brand this microphone was. He said it was louder than wheat. I ate a roasted oyster, which had no taste at all. I cried while eating. It turns out that this is an oyster.
35. The child asked his mother, why can't the candle flame stop for a while? Her mother said it was because it was a little spiritual fire.
36. Do you have an English name, Paul, because Paul is very scary?
37. If Cai Yuan doesn't pay, go to Huang Ting to pick it up.
38. Candle: Mom, why does our flame jump? Mother Candle: Silly boy, because we are a little angry!
You don't even love me. Iqiyi, what do you love?
40. I said I liked Li Bai's poems better. Lu You was so angry that our family couldn't get online.
Humorous homophonic jokes (Chapter 3) 4 1. Embarrassed, I wore a mask and hat to buy a snack, but I was recognized: What do beautiful women eat?
42. The crab accidentally bumped into the loach when going out for a walk. The loach is very angry: "Are you blind?" The crab is very wronged: "no, I am a crab!" " "
43. Crabs and mussels took the exam together. When the crab was caught cheating, the teacher asked the crab whose copy you copied. The crab said, "I copied mussels." The teacher said, "You are a fart."
44. You have to fill in your personal information when you enter the door, so your identity becomes a secret: "Fill it in quietly and leave a little secret".
45. I hate being asked how much I earn. There are many ways to humiliate me. Why did you choose this?
46. There is a piece of glass, and I feel a little sleepy. Then it jumped down from upstairs and said, good night, I'm broken!
47. You seem to have gained weight. I can lose weight with you. Let's give up meat (get married) tomorrow!
48. Hello, a cup of pumpkin almond dew, no melon, no apricot and no dew, and Nanren.
49. Want pumpkin almond dew, not melon, not apricot, not dew, but Nanren.
50. One day, when I was playing king, I died all the time. I told my teammates not to go on the road, not to go on the road, not to go on the road, not to go on the road, do you hear me? Put it down.
5 1. I know three kinds of berries. Strawberry misses me. Which one do you like
52. I don't like it if you don't like it. Who should I send the selfie to?
53. This is the back of my hand, this is my instep, and you are my baby.
54. You were admitted to Tsinghua and he was admitted to Peking University. I baked sweet potato, baked sweet potato, baked sweet potato, sweet and fragrant baked sweet potato.
55. If Huang Ting can't find it, go-ah.
56. Do you know how much the stars weigh? Eight grams because of Starbucks.
57. Puffs are squashed, and my mother says I can't eat them. I asked why, because they are flat puffs.
58. When you see the goddess online at night, send her a message: Are you there? Ten minutes later, the goddess replied, yes, why?
59. When I was in Gucci, my tears were always Parapara Dior.
60. Xiao Ming quarreled with his mother, and Xiao Ming made a dash for the door, so Xiao Ming's house had no door.
46 sentences about gaining weight that make people think you are humorous.
Your humorous copy about weight gain (Part I) 1. I used to be young and aggressive, but now my youth is gone, so I am so aggressive.
God gave me every chance to gain weight, and I took it.
The child is getting fatter and cuter.
4. Say I'm not fat, but I have a chubby face, which is really cute. I want to bite MengMeng's bread face.
5. Losing weight is a life topic that will only be remembered when you are full.
6. Eat or not, what you eat will make you fat.
7. In all these years, I have never found a washbasin bigger than my face.
8. The three most beautiful words in the world are not "I love you", but "you have lost weight".
9. I'm just curious about the world of fat people. I went for a walk and got lost.
10. It's such a cold day this year, but I actually feel fine. Maybe I'm getting fat, fat. Ha ha ha ha.
1 1. You feed me and eat hard. Nobody wants you when you are fat. You are mine and I want you.
12. People become fat in middle age and reach the top when they lose weight!
13. oh, my god If you can't make me thin! Just make my friend fat!
14. Only pants are the only criterion to test whether you are fat or not.
15. Compared with me, I am fatter and more capable.
16. At two o'clock last night, I woke up in a dream with difficulty breathing. Maybe I've grown too fat recently.
17. I wanted to eat my sadness bit by bit, but I ate it into meatballs bit by bit.
18. I am fat because many things are difficult to lose weight.
19. Eating fat, whether talking about environmental protection or democracy, seems unconvincing.
If you eat a little, you shouldn't gain weight.
2 1. People who don't dislike me when I am fat. I will definitely repay you when I lose weight.
22. People are dumbfounded because they are fat, but I am angry because I am thin.
23. The only way to resist the cold winter is to store fat. I mean, I'm getting fat again.
A humorous essay on weight gain (part two) 24. Long time no see, you have grown into two people!
25. My three shortcomings are: first, I am fat; Second, fat; Third, so the fat can't be reduced!
26. Don't call others rude just because they are a little fatter!
27. Other people's figures are all measured and counted. You just need to report the diameter.
28. Don't try to catch up with me. The calories you and I consume are not an order of magnitude at all.
29. Fei Kuang is really fat, rolling around Wang Ling like a ball, standing in front of her like a barrel, but her voice is like a thread, thin and low.
I was too thin last year. I thought I was fat. No one can stop me if I am not pleasing to the eye.
3 1. Sell me by the catty, and I can still maintain Wang Sicong.
32. Fat has grown on my face and fingers recently. How can I lose weight?
33. Every woman who fails to lose weight for a long time has a girlfriend who has been fat for many years.
34. I didn't like to eat when I was a child, which led to my short stature now; I love eating now, which makes me fat and short.
35. How cute chubby girls are. They can play with their bodies when they are bored!
36. I told myself that I couldn't get any fatter. If you can't control your body, how can you control your life?
37. I found myself a little fatter, so I bought a slim skirt to urge myself to lose weight.
38. Your shortness is lifelong, and my fatness is temporary.
39. Fitness is hard, but it's cool to have a healthy and beautiful figure. It's not good to gain weight, but it's cool to gain weight.
40. I'm not fat, I'm cute.
4 1. This is delicious, too. I want it, too. It's time to gain weight in the new year, so sad.
42. Don't say I'm fat, you can grow to 250 if you can!
43. In fact, if you like a girl, buy her more food. If you get fat, it's yours.
44. You can't see your feet when you look down. ...
45. Every fat man is a potential stock. You have no idea how beautiful it is to lose weight. Let those who think you are fat and look down on you regret it.
46. Every day, when you shoot toner, you will slap yourself hard! I hope I can shoot a little.
Homophonic terrier funny jokes cold humor recommendation
Funny jokes with homophonic stalks are cold and humorous (I) 1. I asked my friends in Chengdu why they love to wear Rei Kawakubo so much, and he said it was because they wore it for a long time and there was no pollution.
2. When I was in Gucci, my tears were always Dior in Parapara.
3. The song that fried eggs sing for poached eggs "This is a little love song of fried eggs ~"
The tiger in the zoo gave the lion green. Why? Because the tiger has a green lion qualification certificate.
It is raining. I stepped on the mud and fell. I hate mud. Did you hear that? I hate mud.
6. Yang was poisoned and Ouyang Feng detoxified. He said to the little dragon girl: Don't look at me. The little dragon girl received: Green … green grass has become more fragrant to me?
7. If I call a toad Chuchu, is it cute? I call the coyote a wolf, and only Gina thinks it's cute.
8. One day, the bear was playing with the balloon bear, shouting and chasing. Don't drop the ball, don't drop the ball, you hear me? Please don't leave.
9. After burning firewood all day, I asked my mother what was steaming in the pot. My mother laughed without a word, and finally I couldn't help but lift the lid. It turned out that steaming was boring.
10. One day, the elephant ate ice cream and ate a lot. The more he eats, the more he wants to throw up. Then the mouse said, "The elephant is tired."
1 1. "I have a great job." "What?" "Dig the lotus root."
12. I prefer Li Bai's poems. Lu You is so angry that I dare not surf the Internet.
13. Even I didn't answer. What are you answering, the temptation to go home?
14. You don't even love me. Iqiyi, what do you love?
15. Two grandfathers are playing chess. Child: Grandpa, your car is missing. Grandpa: What kind of car? It's called ju. Child: Oh, Grandpa, you rode away by yourself.
16. When the deer takes pictures of the rabbit, it gets nothing. The deer made the rabbit jump. "You are too short." The rabbit is anxious to cry. "I'm not short, I'm not short at all."
17. Just now, I met a foreigner who speaks English fluently. I asked him if his pronunciation was English or American, and he said that he really wanted to go out and watch electronic music!
18. The girl said to her father, "Dad, where are we going?" Dad didn't hear, but mom smiled. The girl said to her mother, "Mom, what are you laughing at?" Her mother slapped her.
Do you know why the sea is blue? Because the fish in the sea are spitting blue bubbles.
20. I said I liked Li Bai's poems better, and Lu You was so angry that my family couldn't surf the Internet.
Humorous jokes (2)1. During the festival, the white rabbit said angrily to the deer: You see other girls can receive flowers, why not give them to me? The deer said piteously, because I am a sika deer.
22. Driving through a small quagmire, the water splashed by the small quagmire was loud, so it turned out to be such loud mud.
23. Both shrimp and mussel got 100. The teacher asked whose shrimp you copied. Shrimp said, "I copied mussels." The teacher said, "What are you good at?"
24. Don't love me. There is no result. I have a lot of things to do, and I still love my job.
25. The doctor prescribed me some pills. I accidentally knocked over the bottle and the pills rolled out, screaming that they were good pills.
26. One day, I found a little dust on my body. I patted hard, but I couldn't fall, the dust didn't go, the dust didn't go. Did you hear that? I can't go back.
27. Want Want Snow Cake becomes a Want Want quilt when it is hot!
28. It's hot at 36 degrees today. I bought two ice creams, one for you and one for me, and then we cooled off the heat. Did you hear that? It's over.
29. "What book did you buy?" "programming." C++ or java and Shen Congwen
30. I want to take you to eat roasted purple potato, and then whisper "I am purple potato, and you are" in your ear.
3 1. Puffs are squashed, and my mother says they can't be eaten. I asked why, because they are flat puffs.
32. It's cold, but my bed doesn't want me to lie alone. It said I had to lie next to you, and then I realized that I loved you because it was called Wo.
33. Look, I have two erasers here. You don't know, do you? Why? Because you have no object (oak).
34. I went to school today, and the teacher asked me where the books were.
35. You don't like it, and neither do I. Who should I send the selfie to?
One day, this duckling was reading a book, and another duckling said it was time to eat. Close the book quickly and make up with the good duck.
37. One day, the duckling was reading a book. Mother duck said to close the book after dinner. Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off. Did you hear that? Make up.
A hunter killed a fox, and then the hunter died. The fox said, ha ha ha, I am a reflection fox.
39. Neighbors sing KTV at home. I heard a loud voice, so I asked what brand this microphone was. He said it was louder than wheat. I ate a roasted oyster, which had no taste at all. I cried while eating. It turns out that this is an oyster.
40. Be sure to eat midnight snack before going to bed to avoid having hungry dreams.
Homophonic terrier funny jokes cold humor (Chapter 3) 4 1. Pumpkin almond dew, not melon, not apricot, not dew, but Nanren.
42. Now is really the next four tights: tight masks, tight clothes and tight trousers.
43. Nobody understands you. Very wronged, right? Do you think anyone understands this math problem? Wronged?
44. My old colleague signed "God is a girl". I asked him why he was so literary, and he said it was called "unfair heaven".
45. A little mouse stayed at home for too long and wanted to go out and dig. His mother sighed when she saw it. Alas, what a waste of love.
46. I am ironing clothes today, but no matter how I iron them, they will wrinkle. I said don't wrinkle, don't wrinkle, don't go.
47. A duckling said to the chicken, "I like you." The chicken said to the duckling, "You don't have to squat down."
48. Rabbit and Bear's WeChat group was disbanded. The bear talked privately. Bonnie said not to build any more. Did you hear that? Don't say goodbye. ...
49. Yongqi helped the grandmother to take a bath and even pulled out the grandmother mud.
50. I am a little sheep. I sheared the wool once today and it fell off.
5 1. The crab accidentally bumped into the loach when going out for a walk. The loach was very angry and said, "Are you blind?" The crab is very wronged and says, "No, I am a crab!" " "
52. How is the door handle of the company meeting room broken? The boss is worried.
53. If you won't kiss me, what will you kiss, Qinghai-Tibet Plateau?
54. On an island recently, my friend asked me which island I was on. I am on a poor island.
55. Don't even add my WeChat. What else do you want to say, pirates of the Caribbean?
56. Teacher: What is four plus one? Xiaoming: Six minus one Teacher: Why do you say that when you know the answer? Xiaoming: Because we young people don't talk about martial arts.
57. "A piece of glass is ready to jump off a building. Guess what it will say? " "What?" "Good night, I'm broken."
When I went to the zoo today, I saw an elephant eating a child's cheese. It's called eating children's cheese.
59. Falling in love is not that easy. Everyone has their own mobile phone.
60. I felt a little bitter after eating the pills given by the doctor, so I put some dates in my chopsticks. After eating, I became impatient. It turns out that I ate chopsticks, dates and pills.