1. Don't fall in love with me, hypocrisy, and we can get married if we can.

2. I'm losing weight. I don't diet or exercise. I use my mind. I'll lose weight. I'll lose weight.

3. I've always been brave enough to admit my mistakes and will never change.

4. When I walked to the examination room, I completely collapsed, and I saw that the paper was full of tears. I don't test anything I recite, and I can't test anything.

5. Some things don't need to be argued, but they are ostensibly obedient and secretly rebellious.

6. Adolescence love is like spiritual opium. Whether you smoke or not, there is a group of Lin Zexu standing behind you.

7. Brothers are brothers and women are clothes. I'll strip whoever touches my hands and feet.

8. After Liu Hai has been in the street for a long time, he suddenly feels insecure and feels that others are watching him.

9. I have been getting lost in the long road of life.

1. Smurfs sing to Avatar: When I grow up, I will be you.

11. I like dogs more and more after being in contact with people for a long time. Dogs are always dogs, and people are sometimes not people.

12. Putting a cross on a mosquito-bitten bag is to tell Jesus: cure it.

13. in order to save water, try to take a bath with your girlfriend

14. I'm curious: what did the first guy who knew that milk could be drunk do to the cow?

15. Life is like making a phone call. Either you hang up first or I hang up first.

16. Seeing my boyfriend flirting with my sisters in my group, I silently broke up the group when they were chatting.

17. Are you tired? Just be tired. Comfort is reserved for the dead.

18. It turns out that there is no favorite person at school, so there is really no motivation to go to school.

19. Every time I take a shower in the street, I feel that someone is spying on me.

2. Freshmen's opening ceremony is all nonsense.

21. Today, I saw one or three people posting a message saying: Don't be so mean as to rob other people's boyfriends, and I immediately laughed.

22. The school taught me what the temptation is to go home.

23. Mothballs are the worst hard candy I have ever eaten. How can anyone buy them with such a strange taste?

24. You exist, in my staying up late last night, in my night, in my dream and all night. Goodbye, my summer vacation. Funny talk about mood phrases

1. Actually, confession is not good, because it looks black.

2. You are frozen into a ghost in the north, and I show my thighs in the south.

3. I earned 2 million yuan, one with amnesia and one with memories.

4. He was born with a small figure, a narrow forehead and a long mouth and tongue.

5. Eat more celery without asking, and lower your blood pressure.

6. I don't want to last forever, as long as you give me happiness.

7. Brother, I'll throw a brick first. If there is jade, just throw it at me.

8. Everything you like seems hard to keep, such as money.

9. I'll let the old lady put on red mouth and give you some color to see see.

1. others wear shorts to show off their legs, and I wear shorts to show off my fat.

11. Those born are not afraid of death, and those who are killed are not born.

12. It's strange that I am so lazy and miss you very diligently.

13. Thank you for stealing my date and letting me know that he's putting on airs.

14. Make me try and watch me teach your teeth to walk on the ground.

15. Without a strong owner, don't think that you can bite people just because you are a dog!

16. I hope to hold your hand and walk with you one day, which is romantic.

17. The most honest moment in a man's life is when he signs a marriage certificate.

18. You should be better than anyone, but you have a mobile phone.

19. People who say good night to sleep are often still showing off in an ostentatious manner half an hour later.

2. How did the pig die? How should I know if you're not dead?

21. Smart people are unmarried, and it is difficult for married people to be smart again!

22. Boss: Please take it for me first and give it to me later.

23. We have to toss and turn while we are alive, because we will all die for a long time.

24. Don't pretend to be forced in front of people with little influence, but show it in front of people with great influence.

25. What is the minimum standard for making friends with you? It has to be human.

26. We can't be born together, but we can harm people together.

27. I regard money as my grandson, and you regard money as your father. Who do you think I am?

28. I don't know much about music, so sometimes I'm unreliable and sometimes I'm out of tune.

29. Others point to your sore spot and laugh, but you can only laugh foolishly.

3. I am not beautiful, beautiful or gentle, but I love you more than just saying.

31. I want to be an elegant lady, too. It is life that makes me a bitch.

32. The world belongs to us and our sons, but in the end it belongs to those grandchildren.

33. After quarreling with others, I always feel that I didn't play well and want to quarrel again.

34. It's hard to attend class at noon on weeding day. A little broken book, sitting all morning.

35. If I can travel through time and space, I must plant a durian tree in front of Newton's house.

36. I want to spend an umbrella with you. I have had every hot summer and rainy day!

37. The word I love you is ecstasy, and how many people have lost their souls and only their bodies.

38. If you are willing to rip my heart off layer by layer, you will go to jail, I'll tell you.

39. It is said that your hair is long and your knowledge is short. Why are you bald and your knowledge is so short?

4. Behind every successful man, there is a woman who is full and has nothing to do.

41. If you ignore me, I will become a steamed stuffed bun, and I am the most famous one in Tianjin.

42. After the sports meeting, some people won the ranking, while others became expression packs.

43. Except the cold front is the warm front, I hope our relationship can become a quasi-static front.

44. In fact, I worked so hard to gain weight just to occupy more space in your heart.

45. God, I will never call you grandpa again. You don't love my granddaughter at all.

46. depending on men, men can run. If you lean against a tree, it will fall down. You can't run by yourself.

47. On that day, I put on a wedding dress and you put on a suit. What did I realize about the satisfaction?

48. Who is your mother? I want to ask her why she has so much courage to give birth to you.

49. I have a good temper, and I won't be angry at all for my bad temper.

5. Love is a cheap project. Love has no truth, no truth and no dignity.

51. It's our business whether to mix or not. Then don't worry, you don't need to compare behind your back.

52. Earning money is a kind of ability and spending money is a kind of level. My ability is limited and my level is really high.

53. Before there was an iphone in the world, vanity was not so portable and the threshold was not so low.

54. There is a kind of person who only does two things. You succeed, and he is jealous of you. You failed and he laughed at you.

55. When my good friend has a date, I feel that my hard-earned pig is being eaten.

56. When I want to shake hands with someone I like, I can only say: Let's arm-wrestle.

57. Today, someone said that I was a handsome guy. I rushed up angrily and it was a slap in the face. TM, isn't this nonsense?

58. Don't be complacent. Only young people know how to play dirty. Don't admit that you are that identity so quickly!

59. Dear, I don't love your past or your family. I only love you now.

6. When we are in love, we call what we say an oath. When the love is gone, the oath is called a death.

61. My girlfriend ate a kebab in one breath, and my boyfriend said a word. What word did you say? Your mouth is so coquettish.

62. Some people said my photos were ugly, but I smiled. That's because you haven't seen me in person. That's ugly!

63. The teacher always teaches us to take care of trees, but I want to tell you: trees seem to have been made into test papers. .

64. My dream: I have something to do as a secretary, but nothing to do as a secretary. The reality is: a secretary can't do something, and a secretary can't do anything.

65. If your classmate suddenly fainted, what measures should be taken immediately? Slap first to see if it's fake!

66. What does it mean to repay the kindness of a drop of water with a spring? It means that if someone throws a drop of water at you, you will throw it to death with a bucket of water.

67. You will have no regrets if you have loved it. Although it hurts deeply, I think of your tenderness, and I will see spring and miss you on snowy days.

68. In high school, I spent enough money, but I didn't sleep enough. In college, I slept enough, but I didn't spend enough money. After work, I didn't sleep enough and didn't spend enough money.

69. In fact, the most disloyal thing in the world is money. We agreed to go out together, and then it won't come back with me, wasting my heart and lungs on it!

7. If something happens to you one day, please be sure to call me. I won't withhold words or block your knife, but I can come out and be handsome to death.

71. The furthest distance in the world is not the distance between life and death. It's that I stand in front of my future mother-in-law, but I can only call her aunt!

72. At the beginning, the swallow became the director, Ziwei became the director, May became the director, Jin Suo became the goddess, and only Erkang became the expression pack.

73, the right shoes, only the feet know, the right person, only the heart knows, take a thousand roads, only one is suitable, meet all kinds of people, one person is enough.

74, Samsung fell to the ground and broke not the screen, but the heart; When the apple falls to the ground, it is not the screen, but the kidney; Nokia fell to the ground and broke not the screen, but the floor tile.

75. If there were no moon, I would not miss you. If there were no sun, I wouldn't care about you. Even if the sun and the moon go round and round, how can I forget you?

76. Do you know that you can walk out of my field of vision, but you will never walk out of my ardent yearning for you? You can stay away from my shadow, but you can never stay away from my deep attachment to you.

77. Someone asked how big your school is. I replied that the reason why the aunt who sells mala Tang in the west gate of our school refused the pursuit of uncle who sells rice noodles in the east gate was that she didn't like long-distance relationships.

78. The teacher asked Xiao Ming a question in class, but Xiao Ming stood up without saying a word. Teacher: Xiaoming! What's wrong with you? Do you know the answer or not? At least let me know! Xiaoming: cheep ~

79. The courier called me early in the morning. As soon as he got through, he said, Hello, I booked it for a few seconds at this time, and then he added, Wait a minute, I'll see what I know!

8. A friend of mine worked in Wechat business for more than a month and then quit, earning 38, yuan. Now he is working at home. I asked him how he made the money. He said that he was selling fake goods, and his leg was broken. The insurance company paid for it. 81. There was a girl in the class. One day, I quarreled with another classmate, and the other party humiliated him and said, Hello, mother! He said, Hello, son. The whole class was silent. After 3 seconds, the applause was thunderous and prolonged.

82. In biology class, the teacher said: Actually, weasels don't eat chickens. Scientists did an experiment. They once locked a chicken and a weasel together. Guess what the next day? The classmate interjected: Is the chicken pregnant?

83. Just after leaving the gate of the community in the morning, a little girl of five or six years old hugged my thigh and cried: Uncle, marry me! I was in a mess when I suddenly heard a voice behind me say, even if you are married, you have to go to school today! QQ Classic Funny Talk, Funny Talk about Mood Phrases

1. I used to be a schoolmaster, but I was just curious about the world of scum. I went in to have a look and got lost.

2. Don't treat me as a rival in love. Don't worry, I don't like your partner.

3. The typhoon is coming. Please close the doors and windows. If I am blown to your house, I won't leave.

4. It's raining in the city where you live. I really want to ask if you have an umbrella, but I held back because I was afraid that you said no, and I laughed out loud.

5. I play mobile phone late at night, besides being sentimental, I get hit in the face by my mobile phone.

6. I am a person who is good at reflecting on myself. For example, after I slap you in the backhand, I will think about whether I hit you lightly.

7. Do you know how good I am in bed? I can lie down and sleep for a day without eating or drinking. Classic funny talk about mood phrases.

8. I remember when I was a child, my brother and I planned to steal money to buy something to eat. Once my parents found out and asked us to repeat the case. When I pointed to fifty yuan and said, "Look, brother, let's buy something to eat." This product actually said, "No, brother, we can't do this!

9. when rolling is described as gung-gung, I know I can't win this quarrel again.

1. My class is, at best, colorful and rapidly changing, at worst, insane mental hospital.

11. One day, lady white snake farted, and Xu Xian suddenly realized: Lady, are you a rattlesnake?

12. what is a master? Is to be able to judge the opponent's intention in an instant, and then kill the opponent in the invisible. For example, I: Mom, I think my mom: No money!

13. I am so beautiful. First of all, I want to thank my parents. If they hadn't given me a pair of skillful hands, I would have made myself so beautiful.

14. Life is not only about the present, but also the invitation sent by the ex.

15. Kidnapper: I have your head teacher. Student: I won't give you money. Kidnapper: I'll let him go immediately if I don't pay him. Student: I'll get the money right away.

16. Just now, I was lying on the balcony upstairs eating pie, and I heard a man and a woman talking downstairs. The boy said, Can you fall in love with me? The girl said coldly, you want to talk to me, unless pie falls from the sky. As soon as I heard this, I threw the pie on the girl's head. Come on, brother, that's all I can do for you!

17. It is a rare heroic moment in my life to put my life and death at risk while holding a hot mobile phone that is being charged.

18. Women don't have to quarrel with each other, as long as you are more beautiful than her.

19. You are only twenty years old, so it's normal for you not to meet someone you like. The later you find out, you probably won't meet them.

2. I like to have dinner with learned people. As long as I ask a question that they are good at, then the dishes will be mine for the next two hours.

21. After you get married, if the groom is not me, I will.