Many parents in Yongxing County, Chenzhou found that their children had eczema, deformed skulls and "big-headed dolls", and even some children kept beating their heads with their hands. After examination, the doctor found that these children had symptoms such as vitamin D deficiency and stunting, and were diagnosed with rickets.
What is the problem? Parents found that the two-in-one formula powder of amino-sensitive lactose-free deeply hydrolyzed protein that children drink every day is not milk powder at all, but a protein solid drink!
But why do parents give protein solid drinks to their children as milk powder?
It turns out that these children are allergic to milk, and doctors advise parents to give their children amino acid milk powder. Parents bought this product under the recommendation of a shopping guide in a baby-friendly store. A parent questioned when buying, isn't this called protein solid drink? However, the shopping guide told parents that this is another abbreviation of milk, thus dispelling parents' doubts.
In the process of taking the child, many parents found the child's abnormal situation and were ready to stop using it. However, they were discouraged by the shopping guide of Aiyingfang Maternal and Child Store, indicating that the parents did not give the child enough to drink, and even asked the parents to increase the dosage. Some children drank it for two years, which seriously affected their growth and development.
At the same time of consternation, I can't help but think of a news last month that a baby girl who was only three months old suffocated because she practiced lying down. The mother in the "Cheese Wonton" paid sleep guidance group, according to the operation she learned, let the children lie down and watch the children in other rooms by herself. Originally, the child was crying, and the mother was worried, but when she asked the teacher in the group, "Is this crying going to help her turn it over?" At that time, a mother in the group replied, "this problem is not big, so why panic?"
When the mother said, "I was so anxious at the door that I was afraid that she would get bored," the group friends told her "no, no" and discussed the "glorious" process of unlocking her children's sleep. So the mother really didn't take care of the child again, and even after the child didn't move, she excitedly shared the child's "unlocking sleep." It was not until the mother planned to breast-feed that she found that the child had lost her breath.
Why do so many parents blindly believe in these so-called "IQ taxes" that science is actually brain-dead? Do parents know the origin, authenticity and ulterior motives of these people who provide advice?
When parents find and tell the manager of Baby Friendly House, their children have symptoms and are being treated. The store manager immediately said that it was a slip of the tongue that said the special powder was milk powder. The clerk said, "It's no harm if you eat too much, but it's no good either."
When parents questioned the store manager, "If you just made a slip of the tongue, why didn't you let me buy it for two years?" At that time, the manager's answer was, "We all rely on milk powder to eat, and we will definitely follow the sales." In other words, the sales staff simply didn't consider the consequences of letting children eat drinks as milk powder, and the interests came first, coaxing many parents into buying cans of expensive solid drinks for their children to drink!
Let's take a look at the "Cheese Wonton", a parenting consulting organization that teaches children to unlock sleeping. They claim that all the team's parenting teachers have been certified by the American Red Cross Senior Parenting Teachers. In the introduction, to obtain the certificate, you need to pass the examination, and only with the certificate can you legally carry out infant care in the United States. So, what is the real situation?
According to WeChat official account's "Bad Review" search of the original webpage, this is a training course for teenagers. As long as you pay $49 and punch in the online class, you can get the so-called electronic version of the "Advanced Parenting Certificate". There is no need for exams, and there is no technical content at all. Even, the learning content does not involve maternal and child courses at all.
However, the Shanghai Changmei Cultural Communication Company behind "Cheese Wonton" did not open any consulting business before March 12 this year, and now it only vaguely says "Health Consultation and Retail of Maternal and Child Supplies". The company address is also a registered address of the park, and there are 10669 companies hanging here.
In other words, this seemingly tall "cheese wonton" is a "three noes" player-the teacher has no parenting knowledge certification, the company has no corresponding business projects, and even has no fixed address. It can only be obtained by holding a punch card and fooling parents with a youth care training certificate for children who run away from home.
Sales in order to make money, to seize the parents' trust that sales know more about milk powder than they do, and talk about it in Kan Kan without verification; In order to make money and cater to everyone's knowledge panic, institutions use some so-called overseas academic qualifications or foreign theories. Fade away these seemingly glamorous masks, they are not necessarily better than us ordinary parents!
Therefore, in today's era when it is too easy to speak, once parents are scared and too dependent on others, direct harm will be reflected on our children!
It is not easy for our generation of parents. They often study with the mentality of "scientific parenting", but they are often brainwashed. Apart from the instinctive love for children, what are the reasons for falling into the routine involuntarily?
In my opinion, today's environment has also put a lot of pressure on parents. With the inflow of western scientific parenting ideas, the society attaches great importance to education, but it is accompanied by more and more investment in parenting costs and energy consumption. The pressure on parents is increasing, and they dare not act rashly. The names of "father" and "mother" are like a curse. As long as the children don't grow up, parents dare not relax for a day. Under this anxiety, they are more likely to get confused.
A hot search on the video of Sun Li's daughter Huang Duoduo's fitness before triggered a heated discussion among netizens. It's not the first time that Huang Lei's family has made a hot search for education. Before that, Huang Lei allowed her daughter to have puppy love, Huang Duoduo dyed her hair, pierced her ears, wore earrings, made her nails and applied lipstick ... These behaviors were criticized by most parents and called "inappropriate". In the education of the Huang Lei couple, they were tolerant and understanding of their children.
Therefore, every time Huang Duoduo "appears", it will cause a wave of envy and complaints from netizens. "If my parents are as open-minded as Huang Lei, I will be better than now!"!
The enlightened education of Huang Lei's family is really good, but what is worse than our education in Huang Lei is our enlightened attitude?
Huang Duoduo studied in an international school in Beijing, with a 12-year elementary school, junior high school and senior high school, so she didn't need to worry about her junior high school and junior high school. After graduating from high school, she could study abroad, and the annual tuition fee was nearly130,000. Not only that, violin, piano, painting, design, and all kinds of hobbies that burn money have not fallen behind.
Not only the material conditions are good, but also the resources provided are excellent. I have seen all kinds of celebrities since I was a child. At the age of 2, I began to take part in dramas, under the personal guidance of director Lai Shengchuan. At the age of 7, I began to write English scripts, and at the age of 8, I began to translate English books. 10 voiced English animated films such as The Little Prince and Ice Age 2, and10/0/0 was a luxury catwalk ...
We can see Huang Duoduo and his excellent resume, and we can also see the powerful family conditions. Obviously, Huang Lei is training her daughter according to the princess's standards. She doesn't have to consider any material problems, just try boldly. She doesn't even have to care too much about her grades, because she probably won't take the Chinese college entrance examination. She doesn't need to study to change her destiny, because she was born at the finish line that many people can't catch up with. She just needs to cultivate her personality and comprehensive quality.
This kind of education is not bad, but it is not universal. For children from ordinary families, the current exam-oriented education is basically the best way out. If you can't go to a good primary school, you can't go to a good junior high school, you can't go to a good high school, you can't go to a good university ... If something goes wrong, your child's future may be rewritten. Under such circumstances, how can parents not be anxious? That is the reality. If ordinary families learn from Huang Lei to raise their children, they would have gone bankrupt in the process of raising them.
In fact, it's not just a matter of material basis to support the poor and the rich. Even being a tiger mother and a wolf father or providing a free parenting attitude to the maximum extent varies from family to family. Therefore, there is no need to preach Huang Lei's education, and you don't have to make yourself breathless because of the Excellence of others. There is no absolute good or bad education. What you really follow is the ability of each family and the efforts of parents at present. There is no point in worrying too much about children's future, and self-reproach can't give children more things. We have provided the best for children, which is enough.
Having said that, I want to share three things with parents:
1. Every child, as an independent individual, has his own growth rhythm.
Don't question whether it is our or our children's problem just because of some external judgments. It is we who get along with children for a long time every day. The growth of children and the efforts of parents really witness each other.
We are not Huang Lei. At the age of seven, a child may not even recognize a few English words, but his language expression ability is very good. So he can still learn English well in the future, even if the child's expression ability is not strong, but he should watch more, listen more and recite more. We should pay more attention to training, so he can still master this skill even if he is one step behind other children.
If parenting is a competition, it is definitely a marathon, and the transcendence and backwardness for a while will not determine the future of children.
All the so-called scientific parenting ideas or parenting experiences can be used as an aid in our parenting. We can try and not believe it. You know, it's still time that can really change the quality of children, and some things are really urgent.
If the mother who believes in parenting understands this, she can hold her daughter in time when the child is crying, so she won't see the horrible appearance of her daughter's purple lips. One day a few months later, she is pleasantly surprised to find that her daughter can turn around and sleep on her own.
In the face of this unclear "IQ tax", parents had better be conservative.
There are endless routines for merchants. As an ordinary parent, it is almost impossible to completely avoid the pit. Children can't judge whether it is true or not, but they are direct victims. With the protection of children, our parents must take responsibility for their children.
The safest way is to be conservative, use it later, and consult more information before using it, although it is easy to speak out in today's society and there are many ways to obtain correct information.
In the face of ambiguous answers, I would rather believe that all of them are credible, and accidentally pay the "IQ tax" and "break away" in time. Especially when it comes to the safety of children's lives, we must identify the source of information. There is a simple principle for the choice of food and medicine. Show it to a professional pediatrician, ask about the dosage and taking period, and confirm that it is harmless before giving it to children. When the child has an abnormal situation, go to the hospital immediately to check the situation. The incident of drinking fake milk powder was discovered and dealt with in time, also because the problem was found in the hospital.
3. There is no universal educational treasure book, only scientific educational ideas.
On the way to being a parent, there must be a process of trial and error, whether parents or children. For parents' problems, timely stop loss is the first. For children's problems, it is most important to give children the opportunity and time to correct them.
Some children grow up, in fact, parents can't help, they can only accompany them. It is the best support for children to provide parents with a more tolerant environment as much as possible.
You don't have to envy the parenting style of high-class people like Huang Lei. You know, letting children grow up unconventional and boldly live their own personality sometimes means that their comfort zone in the face of society may be small. This kind of chic can't be done without some capital. Relax, after all, as a parent, you have given your best to your children.
In fact, what I like most about Huang Lei's education is, "I have never regarded her as a child. She is a thoughtful person. She has her own ideas and her own life. We are independent individuals, and I will not impose my will on her. " We can't provide as good resources as Huang Lei's family, but we can give our children a comfortable circle as much as possible, so that they can grow up as loosely and comfortably as possible. May every child live to be the best self.