Coping methods of emotional out of control
Countermeasures 1 Remember that the child is not personal.
Many parents feel disrespected when their children are disobedient. The child is angry and crying, and many parents feel that "the child has a bad attitude towards me." This may be a natural reaction, but it is wrong.
Children deal with emotions and information differently from adults. Children don't know what "attitude" is before going to school, let alone judge whether their attitude is good or not. Even primary school students will be angry and make a scene because they have not learned self-control, not because they are malicious to their parents.
If parents interpret their children's anger and crying as "bad attitude" and punish their children, it will cause practical problems.
Countermeasure 2: Don't have unrealistic expectations for children's ability to obey the rules.
The child's "concentration period" is very short and it is easy to be distracted. They still need a long time to digest language instructions.
So when you give your children instructions, don't expect them to follow them immediately and effectively. It also takes time for them to switch from one activity to another. Suppose the child is playing, don't suddenly interrupt him: "Now put down the toy and wash your hands for dinner." They need a clearer and simpler explanation. Get his attention first, for example, "Let's eat egg-filled rice today! Your favorite! Then guide him step by step: "to prepare dinner, put the toys away first." """Now wash your hands." "Come to dinner! 」
Countermeasure 3: first help children build a sense of security, and then teach children to learn to empathize.
Children spend their whole childhood learning "emotions", including how to manage their own emotions and how to observe others' emotions. The younger the child, the less experience and the stronger the dependence, so he is more committed to self-protection, overbearing and angry. By the same token, older children are easily upset if they are in an unfamiliar environment.
Every child's socialization speed is different. Parents should have patience to guide their children to learn slowly, and don't force them to share and put pressure on them. Children must have a sense of security to learn empathy and kindness.
The fourth countermeasure is to establish a positive parent-child relationship.
When children often cry, parents often focus on dealing with these contradictions. Every time the child is not good, the parents will punish the child more severely. As a result, the parent-child relationship is full of these negative interactions.
The more punishment, the more insecure and irritable the child is, and the more punishment, the vicious circle is created.
Pay attention to when the child has a positive reaction. Seize the opportunity to praise him. Facing an angry child, it is not easy for parents to keep calm. But remember, it is more important to manage a positive parent-child relationship than to teach a "good boy".
Countermeasure 5 Don't sacrifice your mental health.
Fighting with grumpy children is also the pressure of parents. A child's temper may make parents very tired and confused, and destroy the parent-child relationship. Negative emotions are contagious. Even the youngest baby can feel that mom and dad are in a bad mood. Parents report great pressure, parent-child conflicts add fuel to the fire, and children are more angry.
Therefore, it is also very important for parents to check their psychological state from time to time. When you feel stressed, please consider seeking professional help.