In life, we always see many funny sentences. Now please enjoy the super funny sentences I brought!

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Super funny sentences:

1. Green mountains and green waters are so lovely, and everyone is beautiful. Love, for the sake of the next generation of our motherland, we must fall in love.

2. Everyone is a blank piece of paper when they are born, but after many years, some people become manuscript paper, which helps them to be happy or sad for a while; some people turn into stationery paper, hiding their secrets. For one person's mood; for more people, it becomes a scratch paper, scribbling and writing, muddled and chaotic. And you became fat paper.

3. My girlfriend, who had just established a relationship, was on a business trip. She told me on the phone that she had bought a pair of pajamas, which were so sexy! My brother immediately became obsessed with it and I said: Send me a photo to see! I miss you! Girlfriend: Should I take the photo with my clothes on or take it off? When I heard it, I was secretly delighted, so I took it off! Then I received a semi-transparent sexy pajama photo, D! It was hung on a hanger.

4. One woman loves you, and you are a husband; several women love you, and you are a man; ten women love you, and you are a love interest; a hundred women love you, and you are an idol; a thousand women love you, and you are an idol; A woman loves you, you are a hero; tens of thousands of women love you, you are a leader; women all over the country love you, you are RMB; women all over the world love you. Oh! You are a sanitary napkin.

5. Going to bed after twelve o'clock in the evening is equal to chronic suicide, not eating breakfast is equal to chronic suicide, frequent barbecue is equal to chronic suicide, leaving the mobile phone on for hours is equal to chronic suicide, staying indoors for a long time is equal to chronic suicide, and complaining too much is equal to chronic suicide. Chronic suicide, lack of exercise equals chronic suicide. I suddenly realized that I had done nothing all day and just committed suicide!

6. Yesterday I went to a female classmate’s house. I used to have a crush on her, but now she is married and has a daughter. The little girl is very cute. If you wanted to recognize me as your father, I said: What are the benefits of being your father? The little girl said: You can sleep with your mother. Suddenly her mother blushed and lowered her head. I want to say that the little girl has someone to teach her?

7. People are cheap for a lifetime, pigs are cheap for a knife. Living is a waste of air, dead is a waste of land, and is a waste of RMB at home. There are so many weapons in China and you don’t learn them. , you prefer to learn the sword; you don’t learn the upper sword but the lower sword; there are so many moves for the lower sword, so you learn the drunken sword; you don’t learn the iron sword, but learn the silver sword! Finally, you have mastered the unique skill of martial arts: the drunken silver sword! Finally, you have achieved The realm where man and sword unite.

8. Every night before going to bed, I read stories to my son. My son listens to them with great interest. After listening to one story, he always wants to listen to another one. That night, I read several stories that my son had never heard before. The more he listened, the more energetic he became. The more I read, the more sleepy I became. Finally, I begged my son: Can I stop telling them? I was so sleepy that I couldn’t even open my eyes. The son replied: Mom, you can read it with your eyes closed.

9. Eggplant: Whether you are as green as blue or as red as purple, just remember that you are just an eggplant. Lotus root: Don’t look at people by appearance, look at things without looking at beautiful packaging, and be careful when dealing with things. Cabbage: You can’t turn around on a straight road, you have to do things in a hierarchical way. Bamboo shoots: You must always take care of yourself, there is a long way to go, and you must stay young at heart.

10. Today, it is so hot that life is worse than death, but there is only one fan in my house. My mother brought the only fan from the living room into my room. My mother has always been like this for so many years. Every time when it was the hottest time in summer, she would bring the fan into my room and let me use it alone, while she silently turned on the air conditioner in her room.

11. We were practicing pie pressing at the driving school, and everyone kept making mistakes. The instructor yelled at us until we were confused, and then he demonstrated by himself. He did it seven times without deducting points. Everyone almost peed with laughter. , the coach got angry, kicked the accelerator, used his special skills, and made a drift. Under our worshipful eyes, I found that the driving school dog was hit and killed.

12. It’s noon on the day of hoeing. It’s very painful to grow fat. I look in the mirror in the morning and cry all morning. I can’t put on my clothes. I feel so painful that I can’t do it without wearing it. It’s even more painful if I wear it. I want to be free from pain. The most reliable thing is to eat less. Just when I made up my mind, something happened at the dinner table! First couplet: One white thing can cover up a thousand ugliness. Second line: Being fat will ruin everything. Hengpi: What a painful realization!

13. While taking a nap, my friend’s husband rubbed his temples and said: Wife, my head hurts. My friend asked if I had a cold! As a result, my friend’s husband said: No, all I can think about is you. The friend was very happy after hearing this, but her husband said again: You used to be so thin, I could barely bear it, but now you are so big, it gives me a headache.

14. In the morning, my son saw the neighbor girl getting married and asked: Dad, why is my sister crying? Dad said: Because she is getting married and goes to other people’s homes, she will rarely come back. The son thought for a while and said: Dad, mom always bullies us, how about we marry her too! Just let her come back to wash our clothes occasionally.

15. I remember when I was in college, one night during a self-study class, I wanted to make a fool of my classmate, so I stuck a piece of paper behind him with a pig drawn on it. There was a very fat girl at the table behind him. The fat girl laughed fiercely when she saw it, and her laughter became louder and louder. The monitor asked her why she was laughing. The fat girl smiled and pointed at the monitor and said: There is a pig behind you.

16. Unknowingly, we have formed a terrible habit. The first thing we do when we open our eyes in the morning is to touch where our mobile phones are. The last thing we do before going to bed at night is to play with our mobile phones. It seems that we are far away. You are as lonely as being isolated from the world when you have a mobile phone! So, try turning off your mobile phone and hugging your friends, and then you will be surprised to find that you have no friends.

17. The manager of the company asked people to hang a slogan on the wall saying that if they want to do it immediately, they hope to stimulate the enthusiasm of employees! After a while, a friend of the boss asked him how effective this measure was. ?The boss said angrily: The cashier took 10,000 yuan and ran away, the office director eloped with my female secretary, and dozens of employees asked for a raise!

18. Treat your wife like a princess, and you will be a prince ; Treat your wife as a queen, and you are the emperor; treat your wife as a nanny, and you are a security guard; treat your wife as a maid, and you are a eunuch. Therefore, whether you want to be an emperor or an eunuch depends on how you treat your wife. Jingxianshen’s reply: Treat your wife like air, and you are God!

19. A Russian came to the coffee shop and ordered a cup of coffee. After a while, the waiter walked up to him: Sir, this is the coffee you want. This drink is excellent, pure and natural, shipped from Brazil! The Russian took a sip of coffee and praised: Not bad, not bad, it has been shipped all the way and it is still hot!

20. After doing my homework for a long time, I turned on the radio: If the skin color is pink and the hair on the face is soft, it means you are healthy. Hearing this, I couldn't help but touch my face, look in the mirror, and smile again. I looked healthy and cute. At this time, the announcer said again: Dear listeners, this is the end of our pig raising knowledge lecture.

21. Nothing is impossible in this world, the key is persistence. Just like me, I knew that the person I liked regarded me as nothing, but I still insisted on sending him text messages saying good morning, good afternoon and good night every day. I persisted like this for a month, and I finally used up the original text messages every month. My SMS package has been used up. We city dwellers all do this.

22. You girl has a pressure cooker lid on your head and a rag sack on your body. You claim to be undefeated in the East, but you are actually perverted in your heart.

23. Explanation is to cover up. To cover up is to be dishonest, and to be dishonest is to be dishonest!

24. Some people like to take advantage and hear about painless abortion. He wanted to have a baby even if it was discounted.

25. Erection is not a panacea, but the inability to have an erection is absolutely impossible.

26. It is said that this is the state of a foodie when he eats like crazy: he enjoys it in his mouth but wants to lose weight in his heart.

27. Even if we are unhappy, we should laugh heartlessly to cover up our sadness.

28. What you are most afraid of is that the person you always think is very important, but the most important person is not you.

29. The school doesn’t want us to fall in love, but it still wants us to wear couple’s clothes.

30. The math teacher is like showing off his skills when he talks about a question. He talks about it for a long time and still can’t stop at all.

31. There is no such thing as being inseparable, only that you don’t want to leave. It’s not that I can’t think about it, I just can’t let it go.

32. The departure of the stool is the pursuit of the toilet, or the lack of retention of the butt.

33. When looking at beautiful women on the street, if you look high, you are appreciative; if you look low, you are a gangster.

34. When I saw you for the first time, my heart beat and beat, and I got cramps.

35. Handsome guys can be viewed from a distance but not played with. Beautiful women can be viewed from a distance but not far away.

36. I am not good-looking, but I am not as arbitrary as you.

37. The thing that is dropped by gravity is an apple, but if it is a coconut, it must kill Newton.

38. I told my friend that I wanted to fart, and my friend said: Hold it back and burp.

39. If I can jump into the sea, can you let me go to the Dead Sea? I want to die special.

40. I fell in love with my bed, but the alarm clock was jealous and always wanted to separate us.

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Selected super funny sentences:

1. I finally know why I have so many gray hairs. It’s because I overuse my brain when I get up and struggle.

2. If a person is willing to make you sad, he won’t care whether you cry or not.

3. If you are hungry and sleepy, please don’t miss the mosquitoes; if you get entangled, you will kill every one of them.

4. I also want to be an elegant lady, but life has forced me to become a shrew.

5. You walked into my world quietly but walked away indifferently after hurting me.

6. In the spring, I don’t wake up, yawns and comes to my door. I can’t sleep at night and can’t wake up during the day.

7. You are calm because you are not afraid of death. I am calmer than you because I am not afraid of your death.

8. This is a world where leaving is popular, but none of us are good at saying goodbye.

9. Even if your brows are covered with dust, you may not be able to let that person know that you have been waiting.

10. Introduce yourself: My surname is Lu, celebrity A. He is the protagonist of this story.

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