06:52) Ming Feng is walking down the street.
Star: That's not how the ball kicks. (Make a word horse with pigtails)
Ming Feng: What are you talking about?
Star: when I say ball, I don't mean kicking D.
Ming Feng: So, how should I kick it?
Star: In a word, waist and horse are one.
Mingfeng; What is the combination of waist and horse?
Stars:
What about the combination of waist and horse? That is, Mr. Bruce Lee, a late martial artist who lives forever in my mind, has explained D.
But if you want to know more, then learn kung fu from me twice.
Ming Feng: What are you studying? Look at you. Aren't you sweeping the floor here?
Stars:
Sweeping the floor is just my superficial work, and my real identity is a research monk.
Mingfeng; Study the wind?
Stars;
Engaged in the research work on how to effectively develop Shaolin martial arts. This is my D business card.
Ming Feng: Shaolin authentic omega supreme leg?
Star: Yes, it's very powerful! !
Ming Feng: Kill you and find someone else. I have a higher education.
Star: Wrong! ! Look at that pretty girl.
Ming Feng: What about a pretty girl? I am a reader. ......
Star: No, no, no, look, look, look. ......
(Pretty girl falls on banana skin)
Two people at the same time: YEAH!
Stars:
If he could learn Shaolin d-flying, this wouldn't happen. Look! So, martial arts is indeed, God! !
Hey, Miss, are you interested in learning Kung Fu?
Pretty girl: crazy!
Stars:
Look at that lady over there ... If she knew Shaolin D iron sand palm, the PARK car wouldn't have to worry so much. So, martial arts is really.
Yes, ok! !
Alas, madam, are you interested in learning? ....
Madam: Go, go, go there.
Ming Feng: Alas, I also have a share of this dime 1
Star: Hey, don't be such a wet blanket! ! Look at that side again
A worker was trying to cut down a tree, but he was kicked out because of his inefficiency.
Stars:
If that worker knows Shaolin D and nine swords D, why bother?
Ming Feng: Dugu Jiujian, that's Huashan School!
Star: Shaolin is a martial art in the world. Haven't you heard of it?
(Ming Feng, pretending to be an old monk, flies to write down four words of authentic Shaolin)
Stars:
Kung fu is really suitable for men, women and children. Killing is just a misunderstanding of it. Kung fu is an art and an unyielding D essence.
God. So I've been looking for ways to repackage Kung Fu so that you stars can have a better understanding of Kung Fu.
A deeper understanding ......
Ming Feng: Ok, ok! !
Star: I'm not finished yet.
Mingfeng:
Almost, almost ... I still have a few guests to meet. That's it for today.
Star: Hey, will you seize the opportunity? The lame can also practice kung fu d ....
Mingfeng:
Lame. Lame for what? Lame your mother? Who are you, fool, to call me lame?
Star: Sorry.
Ming Feng: Lame? Yeah, I'm lame. What's up? Do you have a limp? Lame!
Lame your mother! ! ! (thrown out of the beer can, kicked into the sky by the stars and disappeared)
Ming Feng: What? What? Are you kidding me? Afraid of you?
Worker: Will you accept this garbage or not? I won't give it to others.
Star: Receive, receive.
Worker: Take it quickly.
12:38
A: Hey, help me carry the refrigerator up.
Star: OK, come on! (Kick the refrigerator on it)
A: Oh! The legs are so powerful!
12:55
Scrap station: Twenty cents.
Star: Twenty cents? I have cups and plates here. ...
Scrap station: OK, OK, it's a lot. Hwa, move it there! < ! -printpage.asp # # {$ bbslist} loop part -->
Stars:
This is my sixth brother, who floats on the water with lightness skill, and this is the famous football coach, Brother Feng.
Sixth Senior Brother: Hello, Brother Feng.
Ming Feng: What is floating?
Stars: Floating on the water with lightness skill.
Ming Feng: Hello, Mr. Light.
Sixth Senior Brother: Hey, Senior Brother, are you going to play football?
Stars:
Yes .. If you are as light as a swallow floating on the water, we will attack on both roads, which can be said to be flawless!
Ming Feng: Are you really so sure?
Star: Yes.
Ming Feng: OK, do you have any special weight-loss drugs?
Sixth brother:
It's no use. My brain droops because of a cold. I've been so fat since the death of my master. Now don't talk about flying skills.
You can't walk faster if you want.
Star: Fat is a little fat, but the problem is,,,,, not big. ..
Sixth brother:
Forget it. Look at me before, okay? You can't understand the feeling that you can't even get a girl since this happened.
Star: I see, so am I?
Sixth Senior Brother: No, newspapers and magazines say that you have many girlfriends!
Star: No, what newspaper is it?
Sixth brother:
I'm sorry, I put my foot in my mouth again, so after this disease, I often lose control, so leave me alone and go.
Star: Brother!
Sixth Junior Brother: Huh?
Star: give yourself some confidence, you can do D.
Sixth Martial Brother: Now everyone calls me Pig Fat Biao, only you call me Junior Brother.
Thank you.
Customer:
Hey, pig, help me take down that roll of red toilet paper on it! (Toilet paper piles up like a mountain)
It's the red roll. (Pointing to the top roll)
Sixth Junior Brother tried to reach it, jumped hard and threw himself on the pile of paper.
32:36
Second Brother: Playing football?
Stars:
Yes, second brother. If your whirlwind gladiator leg was used as a defender, I'm sure,
Ming Feng: Is there no flaw ... (contemptuous)
Star: That's right.
Second brother: Look at my virtue now, and I'm still beating my legs like a whirlwind.
Stars:
Hmm ... It doesn't matter if you are a little rusty. As long as you have fighting spirit, martial arts will definitely come back!
Second brother:
But a while ago, I saw that you were still washing the toilet. Why did you do the dishes again?
Second brother:
Why? I also want to ask this question. I don't understand why my father is not Li Ka-shing. Why am I so handsome, but
Want to lose your hair? You two are so ugly, but you don't lose your hair? Why did others have books to read when they were young?
And when I was a child, I was forced by my dad to practice what nonsense martial arts?
Practice until now, wash the toilet! Wash dishes! !
Stars:
Hey, second brother, calm down. Actually, fate is in your own hands.
Second brother:
Calm down? I'm not calm enough? If I don't calm down, I'll kill you two bastards with one knife. (Raise your knife to cut) Calm down? Hum! !
34:23 (rooftop of Times Square)
Mingfeng:
Wow! Really good! Although the sparrow is small, it has everything! I didn't expect you to be a garbage man at 59
The roof of the building lives on the sky! What a taste of life! Now this kind of unit is very popular. I have been looking for it for a long time, but I can't find it. Hey, here it is.
A cold air is a little noisy, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. Hey! Can I put an extra room in your place? Hey! Hey!
(Sitting beside the star) Forget it. None of your other disciples are decent either. Forget it if you don't come and find someone else.
Stars: It's all my fault. I can't convince them.
Ming Feng: Don't say that. I thank you for trusting me as a cripple!
(Senior Brothers Wu Yusen enters the venue)
36:27
Mingfeng:
I will train you into football players in the shortest time. So you should be serious and United!
Star: I see, kick the ball! (A big foot, football without a trace)
36:50
Fourth Senior Brother: Hey, the ball has fallen! !
Star: Are you finally willing to come down? Let's wait for over an hour!
Ming Feng: What are you doing?
Star: Kick-ball! ! !
Ming Feng: The ball is over there. (Everyone chases it) (Blowing the whistle and calling on the stars) You, stand still! You shoot a ball here for me to see.
．
Star: But the ball is over there.
Ming Feng: You know, the ball is over there. You didn't even touch it. What are you kicking? Alas! In fact, playing football is nothing more than four.
Basic: Pass, Stop, Tape, Shoot ..
Star: I understand! !
Ming Feng: Don't move! You should start with the basics.
Ming Feng: Yours, hey, yours. Control it!
Do a fake action, a little more fake, fake action is fake! A little more fake, a little more fake! ! !
Star: Coach, why don't you let me practice?
Ming Feng: Hey, your feet are too strong, and you can't put it back and forth freely. Kick the ball into the sky with one foot, and you will pay for it if you get off the plane.
Up?
Star: I can't afford it.
Ming Feng: Fatty Biao, let me borrow your eggs.
Sixth Junior Brother: Ah!
Ming Feng: You can control the eggs as well as the ball.
Star: OK, come on.
Ming Feng: Come on.
(Eggs break on feet)
Mingfeng; It's difficult!
(Six senior brothers come from afar)
4 1:36
Mingfeng:
Well, the game lasted for 30 minutes, and there was no break at halftime. Everything was based on international rules, and I was the referee. Do you mind?
Glasses:
Of course, Feng Ge, who was called the golden right foot in those days, brought some young people to play some friendship games with us today. You will be the referee, right?
Our pleasure. Everyone is called Brother Feng.
Everyone: Brother Feng!
Mingfeng:
Hey, okay, okay, okay .. This young man had some collision with your players before, so he planned to play a game and learn about his skills.
The past grievances will be written off, and they are very sincere!
Glasses:
From their neat uniforms and friendly eyes, I can totally feel the sincerity and sportsmanship. Thank you!
(drops a wrench)
Don't be nervous, everyone. I am a car repairman myself. This wrench is used by me to screw up. It's reasonable!
Ming Feng: Yes, yes. ...
(Another hammer falls)
Glasses:
As I said just now, as a car mechanic, it is logical to have a hammer around.
Mingfeng:
Come on, your team's style is very famous in the amateur world, I fully understand.
Glasses: Those are just empty names, just like floating clouds. ....
Ming Feng: OK, OK ... Be careful anyway! ! !
Star: Hmm.
Ming Feng: Everybody shake hands!
There were bullets on the pitch and bodies everywhere ... like landing in Normandy.
45:46
Stars:
Call base! Call base! We're under intensive enemy fire! We need immediate reinforcements! We need immediate reinforcements! !
(A sudden thud of a helicopter)
Ming Feng: Get up. Get up! ... get up quickly! ! ! What are you doing?
Star: They are shameless, coach! ! Blow the whistle quickly! !
Ming Feng: I'm the referee. I don't brag!
Star: Is there a king's law? Is it still fair? ! !
Ming Feng: (red card) You, come out! !
Mingfeng:
This is a test. If they can't even pass this level, don't play football in the future! !
Star: It's just playing football. Do you think it's a war?
Ming Feng: The real game is to fight ...! ! !
The stars are silent ... The field is a mess <; ! -printpage.asp # # {$ bbslist} loop part -->
Star: Big Brother is back.
Ming Feng: What are you talking about?
Star: I feel it. It's all back.
5 1:4 1
Senior Brother: Thanks to you, we have a chance to play.
Star: Welcome to your places!
Brother: Thank you.
Mingfeng:
You are welcome, I want to thank you all! I am rich this time, thank you, thank you, thank you!
Glasses:
We give up, please let us join the your team. Please, please.
Star: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! !
53:34
Qiangxiong: Who are you talking about? Dead cripple?
Ming Feng: Why not?
Staff: I'm so sorry. ...
Mingfeng; Little sister, you weren't born when I played football. What are you embarrassed about?
Qiangxiong: Golden right foot! Are you here?
Mingfeng:
Brother Xiong! Brother Xiong, I want to bring my team to the competition. Is it open? Does everyone have a chance to participate? ..
Qiangxiong:
Alas, not everyone has a chance. I am the chairman of the Committee. I say you have the right. Understand?
Ming Feng: Yes, yes.
Qiangxiong: What is your team?
Ming Feng: Come on, come on, call Brother Xiong!
Team member: Brother Xiong! !
Qiangxiong:
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, these are the best! ! ! I really want to see it. What's the story?
Ming Feng: This team is called Shaolin God. .....
Qiangxiong:
Whatever ... hurry up and sign up. I really want to see it. Is there a registration fee? I'll give it to you. Are you and I brothers?
, dead lame! Gee, my shoes are a little dirty again.
Mingfeng: White is easy to get dirty. ..
Qiangxiong: What should we do?
Ming Feng: I'll wipe it for you, I'll wipe it for you. ..
Star: I'm good at cleaning. D. Let me do it!
People poured in: let me, let me, let me! ! ! (take the shoes away)
Qiangxiong: This bastard!
55:27 Tianxin mantou branch
Star: hi!
May: What are you doing? Who are you?
Where are you taking me? Why don't you talk? I went back.
Star: Come on, come on. ....
(entering a shopping mall)
Worker: What took you so long?
Star: I'm sorry, just for a second, ah! Soon!
(Ah Mui is dazzled)
Star: Give it a try.
A-Mei: No, no, no, I'm looking at what material it is made of.
Star: Then touch it.
May: No, no, no, it will get dirty. ..
Star: Never mind.
May: No, no,no. 。
Star: Come on, touch it. Come on, touch it.
May: No need.
(Hands pressed by stars on clothes)
Star: How about it?
May: It's slippery.
Star: I give it to you.
May: Just touch it.
Star: Hey, I'm telling you, I'm going to play football tomorrow.
May: Really?
Stars:
I'm going to be half the sky red, D! ! ! But if you hadn't mended these shoes for me, I wouldn't have played football.
Do you know how important you are to me?
Tell me everything you like! ! I'll send it to you soon.
May: If you are popular, give me a pair of sneakers.
Star: This is no problem! ! !
But I think you should also be a little confident!
In fact, you are very beautiful, D, and you have high martial arts. It's perfect! ! But don't you always cover your hair ... Come on, come on, come on ... Look.
Look at me, look at me. Look at me, look, how beautiful! !
(attracting a bunch of flies)
May: Really?
Star: Yes.
May: Oh.
The star slapped me in the face.
May: Is it a fly?
Star: Yes, but not yet. (Another slap in the face)
May: Did you get it?
Star: Got it.
May: I'm sorry to get your hands dirty.
Star: Nothing! ! You are the most beautiful d, you know that?
May: Hmm. ....
Star: Do you really know?
May: I know.
Star: I really appreciate you! ! (Hugging) You know what?
Worker: Hello! Where have you been? You promised to help me wash the floor before I let you bring the girl down a peg or two. Don't look so long, I'll take the fall. Come on.
Live! !
Star: Hey, you go first, and I'll find you later. (begins to wash the floor)
Be confident! You're the best, D. You know that?
58:4 1 stadium
Star: I like this dress very much. ..
Fourth Brother: I like this sock very much. ...
Mingfeng:
Stop playing, smelly boy, have you never seen a big scene? Just relax and practice like you usually do. There will be a large audience later.
And reporters, smile for the camera! They take pictures of us, and we should greet them warmly.
Team member: Thank you.
Stars: Thank you! ! ! Thank you for your support! ! Thanks a lot! ! !
Big Brother: Hey, it seems to be mowing the grass!
Star (a slap in the face): Isn't the audience mowing the lawn? Thank you! !
Worker: No-no-noisy! ! !
Second Brother: Hey, hey, hey. The venue is so small and empty, didn't you say? ....
Ming Feng: Is it like this in the qualifiers? So we must work hard and play in the final! !
Everyone: Good! ! Kick into the finals ! ! Kick into the final ....
Worker: No-no-noisy! ! !
Everyone: (whispering) Kick into the final! Kick into the finals
The broom fell from the sky and hit them on the head.
59:3 1
Fat man: Hum! Shaolin soccer team? Look at this, look at this, haha.
Look at that, look at that, hahaha! !
Second Brother: Why? Can't smoke?
Fat man: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Start the game ... the star shoots with one foot and the ball goes into the net.
Star: ah ah ah ah! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Fatty: What for? .. (to himself) No problem, it's an illusion.
The star shot angrily and the ball went into the net again.
Fatty: What are you doing?
Don't be afraid, it's all an illusion. It seems that our Tofu King Kong team is going to do its best this time.
The stars rushed up and they looked at each other.
Fatty: What are you doing?
Another goal ............................
Fatty: What are you doing? I want to play football.
0 1:00:52
Hello: Brother Xiong, phone call.
Qiangxiong: What? Forty to zero?
0 1:03: 17 sweet heart steamed bread shop
Star: Dear other disciples, from today on, we will tell this pile of rotten shoes BYE BYE! !
Attendant: Hey, will you stop littering?
Everyone: Sorry, sorry …
Ah mui with heavy makeup
May: HI! !
Star: ah mui?
May: Why?
Star: Wow! I cann't believe you're like this, D.
May: What?
Star: You think I don't know what you think?
May: Say what? Do you hate it? You ... (Sitting)
Star: you can't scare me, D. I'm afraid of everything, so I'm not afraid of ghosts! ! ! !
May: What do you mean?
Star: Ah, ah, here you are. ..
A-Mei: I think I'm particularly different from the previous A-Mei today.
Star: Yes, Ah Mui is a very confident girl now!
May: Well, I want to tell you something.
Star: What is it?
May: I like you.
Star: I like you too!
May: Is it love between us?
Star (one leng): You, are you kidding?
May: Really, I'm serious.
Stars:
Of course it's not love. We-good friends forever! Wouldn't that be better?
Ah mui:
Then you can come to me often in the future! I can mend your shoes if they are broken.
Stars:
No, my shoes are broken, so I threw them away. Should we all move on? I will never wear out my shoes again.
Don't you do this? What, are you crying? Don't be like this!
Ah mui:
I see, thank you. (running back) Come on, let's all drink together! ! Come on, cheers!
0 1:06:3 1
Jade-faced double dragons: We jade-faced double dragons are not the hollow name of the waves! If you want to enter the finals, ask us first! (flies by)
Sixth Martial Brother: Is it so fast?
Star: Hanging wire, right?
0 1:08:07
Ming Feng: Hello, Brother Xiong!
Qiangxiong:
Come and sit down. Hey, you're lucky, son of a bitch. I can't believe you found such a team of unique skills. Actually, what are your iron achievements?
Breaking a big stone in the chest is the kung fu of a three-legged cat. It can actually break into the stadium. It's good! Cut the crap. On the day of the final, don't
Kicked! Come on, team!
Hey, this is not a bad check. You can sign the contract after receiving cash.
Ming Feng: That's a lot of money. You can't spend it after breaking your leg.
Qiangxiong: Of course! Are you and I brothers?
Ming Feng: Thanks, Brother Xiong, but I'm afraid I can't stand it.
Qiangxiong:
What do you mean, you think I'm afraid of you? Hey, I think that team is interesting. Do you want to make it big together? Be an open-minded person and move forward.
Look, don't hold grudges, okay?
Mingfeng:
Brother Xiong, I really don't hold grudges. When I was young, I didn't understand. Everything goes around comes around.
Qiangxiong: Don't play dumb with me. I have seen through you. Hey, will you be greedy?
Mingfeng:
Really let you see through, not only me, but my whole team is greedy, but it's not this check, it's the national champion, see you at the stadium! ! < ! -printpage.asp # # {$ bbslist} loop part -->
Tianzaixin mantou pu
Star: ah mui! ! !
Wife of shop-owner: dead! !
Star: How did she die?
Wife of shop-owner: I killed him! ! !
Stars:
I don't believe it. Ah Mui is so good at martial arts that you killed her? ! She must be dead. D is wronged! ! !
Wife of shop-owner: Then what do you want?
Star: I want to help her-revenge! ! ! ! (Break the door panel with one punch)
Wife of shop-owner:
Stupid! I'm just kidding you. She's not dead, but she doesn't work here anymore.
Star: Why?
Wife of shop-owner:
Alas, we clearly call this sweet steamed bread! I don't know why the steamed bread made by that silly girl is bitter and salty, and the guests don't come.
I was forced to fire her, too
Star: Bitter and salty?
Wife of shop-owner: Yes, ah, what's your name? What's the matter with her?
Star: Ah, it's all right.
Boss: (whispering) psycho! ! !
0 1: 18:55
Mingfeng:
A foul ball? Kicking on the head is a deliberate attempt to hurt people. How do you make a ball certificate when you award a foul ball? Qiangxiong, are you playing football or hitting people?
Qiangxiong:
I'm hitting people. How about that? I'm going to beat your whole team as crippled as you are, crippled! Disabled! ! !
Fight me!
Fourth Senior Brother: Sorry, everyone, I'm going to take a break.
Star: Never mind D, you just leave, and the spirit will always be here!
Four seniors put on sunglasses.
0 1:28:0 1
Referee:
Shaolin team, there are only seven players left. If there are no backup players, I will stop the game and announce that your Shaolin team has lost.
.
Is there any backup?
A-Mei: Hey, there's me. I'm the backup of Shaolin team, and I'll be the goalkeeper.
Star: How do you make D look like an alien?
May: I can't cut my hair. It's quicker to shave it off.
Star: What are you doing here?
May: I'll help you with the game!
Star: How can you help? Hurry back to Mars! The earth is dangerous, D.
May: I really want to help you. Trust me, let me try.
Star: No!
May: Really! Look, your shoes are all broken. Wear this.
A pair of colorful old sneakers.
Finally, Ah Mui helped the Shaolin team win the game with Taiji Kung Fu.
Shaolin Kung Fu can be seen everywhere in the street.
Building <; Time magazine > Huge billboard "Wulin lovers, set off a kung fu craze"