A girlfriend bought her boyfriend two ties as a birthday present. The next morning, the boyfriend happily put on a new tie. The girlfriend saw this and said angrily, "What do you mean, do you not like the other one!"
My boyfriend loves me very much and thinks of me for everything. Today for the first time to go to his home, I worry that I took off the high heels will let his parents see that I am too short. He took me by the hand and said, "It's okay, I told them you have smelly feet and can't take off your shoes."
On the subway, a man felt familiar with the girl across the street, and stared at him all the time. The girl was tired of looking, and asked, "What are you looking at?" The boy said: "I think you are very familiar, like my former girlfriend." The girl said angrily, "I'm your old girlfriend." The boy was confused.
Colleagues plus a sister WeChat, plus after the sister asked: you are which one? He: the passer-by. Then the girl came a sentence: then you go over it. The next thing you know, you're pulling the plug on him.
I am a cab driver, is traveling normally, was stopped by a traffic police. I was angry with the traffic police: I did not drink, did not violate the law, did not run a red light, and did not hit anyone, why did you stop me? The traffic police calmly said: I took a taxi...
I remember when I was in school, there was a question on the exam, Li Qingzhao is what school, I wrote is the Wu-Tang school. The teacher said that there is a student's answer can go to the parents, then I was very nervous, looked down my desk wrote the yolk pie, instantly relaxed a lot.
Found an ant at home, I put some sugar in front of him, it surveyed for a while should be running home, and then I got rid of the sugar, I want to make its companion think he is a liar.
One of the male students in our class, who scored full marks in math and failed in English, was punished by the English teacher to stand in the corridor. Not a moment later the math teacher passed by and took him to another class for a math lesson.
Colleagues home renovation house, go to the building materials market around, the best wallpaper even offer 3000 yuan / square meter. A look at this price, we counted, suggested that you might as well directly with 20 yuan bills paste wall, less than 2,000 yuan per square meter, you can also save more than a thousand dollars, looks also dominant.
Small Ming took a small child home to play, children go after the mother asked: "Small Ming, just now that student, in the class, how many ah?" Xiaoming: "the penultimate first" mom angry, snap, caught Xiaoming a beating: "let you do not learn, let you do not learn, I did not say do not play with the children worse than you, you have to play with the first! Xiaoming: "When I first started playing with him, he was number one ah!"
Xiaoming received his summer homework and complained to the teacher: "This is too thick!" Teacher: "Really, how about I make it a quarter thinner then?" Xiaoming: "Sure." So the teacher flipped to the end of the book and nimbly tore out all the reference answers
Store clerk: "Haircut? "Customer: Yes, a haircut. Ordinary washing, cutting and blowing, do not dry cleaning, do not ignorant little sister blind pinch neck, do not chief do not designers, do not perm hair coloring to do positioning, more do not charge 2000 to play 50% off to charge 5000 to play 30% off the membership card, but just ordinary cut short on it, from now on we who first speak who is a son of a bitch good.
Men who have money become bad, finally understand those girls always say to me: "you are a good person" meaning.
The two Beijingers encountered. "Your name?" "I don't dare to say, I'm afraid you'll eat it." "Fan?" "No." "Yu?" "That's not right." "Then what's your last name?" "Shi."
Q: "What should I do if I have an impossible person living in my heart?" A: "Raise the rent sharply and force him to move himself."