Zheng Haiyan, the Central Plains Focus Team, insisted on sharing 1184 days of 2121.11.2

Full of harvest and full of emotion!

1. Tonight, the peer supervisor of Senior Seven is me as the host. So when I came home from work, I hurried to put the rice in the pot to tidy it up, and it was time to start supervising. Then, in the whole supervision process, my daughter carefully finished her homework alone, filled her own rice from the pot, and then served me rice. In order not to disturb my speech and host, you also wrote me a note. Mom, are you still hungry? Still eating fruit? Finally, the child boiled water and brought me foot washing water, and heated two bags of milk. The child was very quiet all night and didn't speak loudly. There is nothing to ask my mother for help, but to do what I can first. I am really moved, moved by the child. She will do such things, such as serving food to her mother, handing her a note to ask if she is still hungry, and giving her foot washing water. These are all things I will do for her at ordinary times. Now that the child is different, I am very warm and gratified when I do all these things and give them back to me.

Before, my children didn't support me to study psychology very much, because I always had to attend classes, always invited to practice, and always went out to study, which took up a lot of time with her. She had some complaints, but every time I needed to speak in the process of study, my children always encouraged me to say that mom was talking. Then, when the child heard me hosting last night, I kept talking and interacting. I believe that the child should be very happy for her mother, so in order to support me, she silently took on all other things, so that I could host and study with peace of mind. My heart is full of emotion.

2. I was moved by my partners' enthusiasm for learning and everyone's tolerance for me. I have never hosted, nor will I host peer supervision, and even I have never hosted other activities. I always think that I can't speak, dare not speak, and am afraid that I can't speak well. So I asked Mr. Taoge about the presiding process in advance last night. Although I didn't know what to say, last night I felt that everyone interacted very well, very positive and very willing to share their ideas. We are a small learning and growing team with love, temperature and depth.

3. Thinking about the case

It is really not so easy to do fee consultation on the platform. There are many settings and restrictions, and it always feels that it is not the home of consultants, and visitors have many rights. Especially if you have compulsive thinking like this, and you have been diagnosed and taken medicine, it is very challenging to communicate. I admire the intelligent teacher's wisdom, love and consulting skills to accompany visitors for four or five times.

Consultation should be slowed down and detailed. Only by slowing down will we be more detailed and in-depth, and we will have specific discussions on more points. Instead of anxious to see the change of visitors and see the effect of consultation. Only we can get rid of the utilitarian heart, get rid of our motivation to change others, and walk with him slowly. Find out what visitors really want, care about and pay attention to. Seeing his resource advantages, his successful experience, the support system around him, his growth experience, etc., you will understand him, support him and see him. Constantly confirm the visitor's perception, what he thinks, what he thinks, and why does he feel controlled? What kind of control is specific, etc., we will have a clearer context.

feel it from the perspective of parents, visitors and consultants. Really different roles, different positions will have different views, everyone has their own reasons, and everyone wants to be better in the moment. The feeling of this role allows us to understand the visitor's heart and the feelings of important people around him more deeply. Can understand what kind of thinking the consultant has in the process of consultation. It is possible to broaden some ideas for consultation and find some different faces.

The relationship between consultation and visitors is particularly important. If you establish a trusting, inclusive, accepted and supported relationship with visitors, there will be more sticky consultations that will last longer. Therefore, during the consultation process, the counselor's listening, accepting, understanding and support definitely respects and encourages, and every positive feedback, seeing the successful experience of the visitor's resources, seeing his positive side, giving feedback and encouragement, will make the visitor feel supported, understood, paid attention to and seen, and will also enhance his inner strength, and will be willing and willing to have a deeper and more frank chat with the counselor.

objective setting of consultation. Every consultation needs a direction and goal, at least a big theme. With the theme, we will know the scope of our key discussion, and learn more about the visitor's needs, motives and wants under the theme. You can discuss with the visitor where his goal needs help. In this way, every consultation is to move forward step by step, rather than just staring at the ultimate goal. Every time I want to achieve the final goal, I think it is still relatively difficult. I can refine it, refine the big goal into each small goal, and realize the small goal step by step in every consultation. Then, after a period of companionship, it is possible to achieve the big goal unconsciously.

As for obsessive-compulsive thinking, there are two kinds of obsessive-compulsive disorder in abnormal psychology, one is obsessive-compulsive concept, and the other is compulsive behavior. Obsessive-compulsive thinking belongs to one kind of obsessive-compulsive concept, that is, some people repeatedly enter the patient's consciousness field with words or beliefs, which interferes with his normal thinking process, but they can't get rid of it. This includes compulsive exhaustion, and you want to get to the bottom of it and think again and again; If you have forced doubts, you will know that it is unnecessary, but you always doubt whether you have done repeated inspections; Forced association, always have this thought of another; There are also compulsive memories, so I repeatedly recall some past experiences.

here, the visitors were diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive thinking, had medication experience, and had suicidal thoughts. So what visitors complain about is the conflict with their parents, the parents' control and finally asking their parents to apologize to them, and so on. Can these things complained by visitors be more detailed and specific, or can the counselor make an assessment, to what extent is the control, and is the parental control in a limited range? Or are these all the visitors' subjective thoughts? This is his cognition. Therefore, there must be confirmation in consultation.

Thank you again. Thanks to the intelligent teacher for bringing us such a representative case that is far and near from us, so everyone is very interested in discussing it. Thanks to our warm and supportive team in Grade Seven.