To judge mental state, we must first distinguish between death and life. This kind of life and death is not a traditional life and death, but a psychological life and death. What does that sentence say: nothing is more sad than the death of the heart, which is psychological death.
So how to treat "what is death and what is life" from the psychological level? It depends on how one's ego grows.
From birth, a person can't use his hands and feet, and he can only rely on his mother to support him. The baby can't tell who is mine and who is his mother. Until he was 7 or 8 months old, one day he found that his nose was his own and his breasts were his mother's. Touching yourself is different from touching your mother. At this time, his physical self was established.
Children who have just started learning English will touch their stomachs and tell their mothers that "baby" is hungry, and they will also point to a small cup and say "baby" to drink water. When he was about 3 years old, he would suddenly say "I" want to drink water. At this time, his social self was established. He began to know that I was different from others. I should adjust myself according to other people's requirements and start to get rid of egoism.
Since adolescence, people gradually begin to understand their emotions, and they can adjust their views on one thing through cognition. At this time, the psychological self is established, and the construction of the psychological self will continue until the end of life.
People's psychological growth is carried out in chronological order, so when a person comes to the end of life, it also ends in the order of the earliest development. The first is physical death, which begins with the doctor declaring the patient brain dead; Then the family took the death notice issued by the doctor, went to the place where the household registration was cancelled, and informed relatives and friends to hold a memorial service for the old friend, and a person's social psychology came to an end; N years later, the ancestors buried in the ancestral graves will still have descendants to pay homage. If future generations forget it, it means that the psychological self has completely disappeared. If you are interested in the above description, you can search for the movie Dream Travel. After reading it, you may have different ideas about your life.
Just like the poet Cang Kejia's work Some People: Some people are alive and he is dead; Some people died, but he is still alive.
Su Shi and Master Su have been dead for thousands of years, and his Dongpo elbow has been in the recipes of gourmets. "Don't listen to the leaves in the forest, why don't you sing slowly. Bamboo poles and sandals are more dexterous than riding horses. What's to be afraid of? A hemp fiber and a raincoat, regardless of the wind and rain, still live my life. " This heroic spirit still deeply affects modern people.
Having said that, I just want to express one meaning. Life and death here are psychological and have nothing to do with reality.
For example, when I give a lecture on the podium, I interact with my eyes and listen carefully. At this point, his heart is alive. I talk about mine, he plays with his, and doesn't listen to my lecture at all. Why do you knock on the blackboard and people are indifferent? To me, his heart is dead.
Distinguish between life and death in mental state, put the dead aside first, and then live further.
Living is divided into normal mentality and abnormal mentality.
What is the standard to distinguish between normal and abnormal? According to medical standards: whether there is any disease in the brain. According to statistical standards: Is it like most people? According to the standard of introspective experience: whether there is a painful emotional experience inside. According to the social adaptation standard: whether you can work and study normally.
Guo Nianfeng's Three Principles are the criteria for distinguishing normal from abnormal in psychology:
First, whether the subjective world and the objective world are consistent. If a person has hallucinations or delusions, then his subjectivity and objectivity are definitely inconsistent. If a public official can protect his income through drought and flood, and he can't get out of the storm and complain about his work every day, it will be bad and bad. We judge his subjectivity and objectivity from the psychological level.
Second, whether knowledge, emotion and meaning are consistent. Knowledge is cognition, emotion is emotion, that is, will behavior. If a person meets a pleasant thing, he will have a happy mood and will dance to tell others about his inner experience. We said that it is normal for him to know that his feelings are the same. If a person knows that his friend is a good man, but hates him as soon as he sees him and avoids him, then his cognition is no problem. His feelings and intentions are consistent, but his knowledge and feelings are inconsistent, so we say that his mentality is abnormal.
Third, the personality is relatively stable. Personality includes temperament and character, temperament is innate, and character is cultivated and relatively stable. For example, every time a person gets together, he just shows up at dinner and disappears at checkout. We say that he is stingy. If one day, he suddenly becomes generous and grabs orders, we will say that his personality has changed and he needs to be vigilant.
If one of these three criteria does not meet, we will judge that the person's mental state is abnormal.
Mental health we will further decompose: mental health and mental unhealthy. There are ten criteria for judging mental health, such as psychological endurance and flexibility. Pure theoretical knowledge, you can search in Baidu. I'll give you a practical and easy-to-remember judgment method: three conditions and three acceptances.
The three conditions are prosperity, adversity and despair, and the three conditions are enjoyment, patience and acceptance.
Mentally healthy people can enjoy in prosperity, endure in adversity and accept in despair. Of course, this is only an ideal state. 100% healthy people do not exist. Generally speaking, some people can enjoy it, but they can't accept it; Some people can bear it, accept it but can't enjoy it; Some people can enjoy it, accept it but can't bear it. Let's take a closer look. Is there such a person around?
Some people work hard when they are young and don't complain when they are bitter. When I am old, I dare not enjoy happiness and keep tossing people around me. Others have had a smooth life, and a little spray has knocked themselves down.
These are all examples of three hardships in life, but what is prosperity? What is adversity? This requires a smart heart to distinguish. There is a prayer that says: May God give me a brave heart to change what can be changed; May god give me a calm heart to accept what is acceptable; May God give me a wise heart to distinguish what can be changed and what is acceptable.
We have identified four psychological states of people. What should we do with them? As the saying goes, consulting without teaching others how to deal with it is pure hooliganism.
The following are specific coping strategies:
First, the state of psychological death, we can try to activate, if the other party is paranoid, oil and salt do not enter, we must learn to shut up.
Second, psychological abnormalities must be followed. One person said 3x7=28, and I know 3x7=2 1. If I argue with him, I will be the one who gets hit by the board. So I followed him and said, Yes, you are right! This will be harmonious. Some people say, aren't you confusing facts? Listen, you forgot to talk about psychology again. Right? It depends on who you are talking to. Psychologically speaking, validity is more important than correctness.
Third, mental health, we can be reasonable, from the ethical, legal and moral point of view, can be explained.
Fourth, mental health, to talk about psychology. Reason and psychology are opposites. People have lived in a rational world since childhood, and they can't do it if they understand the truth. We need to start from the psychological level, channel his emotions and understand his desires.
We say that people with mental health will express their reasonable demands; People with unhealthy psychology will suppress their emotions and cannot express their demands; Psychopaths will act directly.
Is it easier to operate this way?
Do I make myself clear? Is everyone clear?