People often say, "Treat people sincerely and do things appropriately." Sincerity can deepen the feelings of both sides and improve the popularity index, but being sincere to others is not regardless of occasions, opportunities and objects. What is worthy of sincere treatment must not be handled rashly; People who shouldn't be sincere should be treated as appropriate. Think twice about what you don't know, so as not to be used.
Sincerity is a virtue, and being honest with others can gain good popularity; Sincerity is a kind of mind, being honest with others before interests; Sincerity is a realm, and we need to face our mistakes bravely. Sincere people are easily favored by opportunities, and these opportunities may be created for you by friends around you who have been treated sincerely.
The story of Yan Shu, a famous poet in the Northern Song Dynasty, deserves our deep thought. Yan Shu took part in the imperial examinations before he came of age. During the exam, he looked at the test questions and said, "I did this topic ten days ago, and I still have the draft article." Please ask the emperor to change the subject. "
Song Zhenzong appreciates Yan Shu's honesty.
One year, Song Zhenzong's privileged courtiers chose a tourist attraction to hold a banquet. Officials, large and small, actively signed up for this activity. Due to financial constraints, Yan Shu stayed at home and studied with her brother. When Song Zhenzong selected officials to assist the Prince, he chose Yan Shu from the crowd, which was not understood by the civil and military officials in the Qing Dynasty. Zhenzong explained: "I heard that officials at all levels go sightseeing, eating, drinking, singing and dancing endlessly." Only a diligent and studious person like Yan Shu can shoulder the heavy responsibility of assisting the prince. " When Yan Shu heard this, she told Song Zhenzong frankly, "It's not that I don't like playing or eating, just because I didn't have money at that time. If I have money, I will also attend these tourist banquets. " After listening to Wan Yan Shu's explanation, Song Zhenzong paid more attention to him than to be angry. Song Renzong and Yan Shu were promoted to prime ministers.
In ancient times, officials took the position of prime minister as their lifelong goal. Yan Shu's sincerity won him the trust of the emperor, and he finally became the prime minister, which can be described as natural.
Sincerity is the foundation of doing things and success. If others are sincere to you, but you have ulterior motives, it will inevitably be abandoned.
Once there was a young man who lived by the sea with his old father. Being withdrawn, he seldom plays with his peers, so he sits by the sea and plays with seagulls every day. Over time, he formed a tacit understanding with seagulls. As long as he stands by the sea and whistles, hundreds of seagulls will fall beside him. He ran and seagulls circled over him; He sat with seagulls on his shoulders; He was lying on the beach and seagulls landed on him. People will be surprised when they hear about it.
Later, someone said to his father, "Your son is so close to seagulls, please let him catch some to play with." Father also felt fresh, so he said to him, "The villagers heard that you often play with seagulls, and the relationship is very friendly. Grab one for me, I want to experience the taste. " The young man agreed to his father's request.
The next day, as usual, as soon as he got to the seaside, he blew a long whistle and a flock of seagulls immediately appeared above him. However, something strange happened. No matter how hard he whistled, seagulls circled overhead, but refused to go near him. Young people can't help burying their heads deeply.
Birds are like this, how can people feel inferior? This story tells us that only by treating each other sincerely can we win the recognition of others and do things well, not only for animals, but also for people.
How can I be a sincere person? (1) Be sincere.
If you are dishonest to others, no matter how beautiful you say, it will be useless. Different opinions and clever words will only make him feel disgusted. No one is a fool, and sooner or later he will expose your conspiracy, because he is insincere at heart, and even if he speaks well, he will be discovered by the other party. On the other hand, if sincerity comes from the heart, even if you are clumsy and inarticulate, you are practical and sincere, and others can feel your sincerity. This is what Yan Shu did.
(2) Don't cheat
When dealing with people, the most taboo is to treat friends in a deceptive way. Deception may be a temporary gain, but it will never last. What's more, it will be discovered by others sooner or later. Once the scam is exposed, your image in the eyes of others will plummet. Even if you treat him sincerely in the future, others will think it is a hypocritical gesture and lose trust in you. The lesson learned by the young man who can't catch seagulls deserves everyone's attention.
(3) Distinguishing situations
If the other person is a calculating person, but you are intimate with him and speak freely, it can only show that you are a stupid person.
There are three restrictions on sincerity: first, people, second, time and third, land. These three conditions must be met when you really open your heart to others. It's a person, but the timing is wrong, so I can't get it off my chest quickly; When the time is ripe, the object to talk to is wrong and you can't say it; The object and time are mature, but the place is wrong and I still can't say it. Only by meeting these three conditions at the same time can we be sincere and not be deceived.
Treating people sincerely is the foundation, but on this basis, we should also treat things appropriately.
The so-called discretion means that everything should be treated as appropriate. Doing things will inevitably produce favorable or unfavorable results. At this time, we should deal with it as appropriate:
Naturally, the more things that are beneficial to others, the better. It's okay to be selfish, but don't interfere with others. If it's not egoism, it depends on your ability. If it is egoism, try not to do it or do it less. If it is not good, resolutely put an end to it.
Everyone is familiar with the story of Mr. Dong Guo and the wolf. Be sincere to people, but be clear about the target. If we are dealing with that kind of sinister villain, it is natural to treat it differently.
All successful people know how to treat others sincerely and behave appropriately. You gave the other person a sincere heart, and the other person will definitely return you a sincere and strong feeling. Of course, while treating others sincerely, we should also pay attention to making use of the situation to avoid being betrayed and helping people get money.