Zhao Benshan: My husband's pig, with black background and white flowers, suddenly flew forward at a speed of 80 miles per hour one morning and crashed into a tree and died. Excuse me, what is this?

Tang Priest: That pig has poor eyesight.

Friar Sand: There may be some mental illness.

The Monkey King: That pig can't make sharp turns.

Pig Bajie: You curse!

Fan Wei: Please listen to the question. After the Spring Festival, we didn't buy any new year's goods at home, only a pig and a monkey were left. Do you think I should kill the pig or the monkey first?

Tang Priest: Kill the monkey first.

Fan Wei: So are pigs.

Friar Sand: Kill the pig first.

Fan Wei: So are monkeys.

Wukong and Bajie: When did we ever think like this?

Shi Shuo

Cui Yongyuan: Master Tang, how did you all go to the Western Heaven?

Tang Priest: Of course, a big shot like me took a special plane.

Cui Yongyuan: Sun Xiao, I heard from Master that you went by special plane?

The Monkey King: Yes, I went there by a tractor pulling bricks.

Cui Yongyuan: What did you do after you got the scriptures back?

Tang Priest: I sign books. This is a lively scene with red flags flying and a sea of people. (right hand swings back and forth on the chest)

Cui Yongyuan: Is it true, Sun Xiao?

The Monkey King: No, I didn't sign the book. Aren't they all free? Take it home and stick it all on the wall, one on the left and one on the right, one on the left and one on the right. (right hand swings back and forth on the chest)

Honggaoliang model team

Fan Wei: Monkey walking is not a monkey walking, but a monkey walking in a straight line.

Pig Bajie: Teacher Fan, I think whether a monkey can walk in a straight line depends entirely on the monster. If the monster turns a corner and the monkey walks in a straight line, are you talking about the blind monkey walking in a straight line?

(Wukong goes after Bajie and hits him)

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Cui Yongyuan: I heard that there was a conflict on your way to learn from the scriptures? How did you solve it?

The Monkey King: After a show of hands by Bajie and Friar Sand, everyone agreed that I was.

Cui Yongyuan: You're right.

The Monkey King: Apologize to Master!

Cui Yongyuan (turning to Tang Priest): Apologize must come from Master.

Tang Priest: That night, Mao Mao knocked on my door. As soon as I opened the door, I stared at me and insisted on reciting a poem for me: Ah! Master, Wukong apologizes to you. When I come to your door, please open your eyes and see how pathetic I am. Today, how can you and I repeat yesterday's story, and whether my old boat ticket can still board your wrecked ship!

Cui Yongyuan: Sun Xiao, what happened?

The Monkey King: (covering his face shyly) The sound of the waves is still there!

hourly worker

Princess Iron Fan: People say that you have a jade-faced fox outside. Is it true?/You don't say.

Niu Wangmo: Forget it. If she is beautiful, it's worth it! That fox is uglier than you.

Princess Iron Fan:

Niu Wangmo: Ah. No, she's not as ugly as you!

Princess Iron Fan:

Niu Wangmo: I mean, you are uglier than her!

Princess Iron Fan:.

Niu Wangmo: I'm sorry, madam. I always hurt your self-esteem. . .

Princess Iron Fan: I know exactly what kind of man you belong to, old cow-you definitely belong to the kind that goes looking for trouble!

the thief company

Guanyin: How do you feel about being arrested in the South China Sea?

Black bear monster: me. . . I regret it! You said that I, a handsome seven-foot man, didn't do well. How did I become a thief?

Guanyin: It's good to know.

Black bear monster: it is better to grab the road.

Guanyin:

heart disease

(the Monkey King is crushed by Wuxing Mountain)

Tathagata: Wukong, life has 36,000 days. Like a meteor in the sky, it comes in a hurry, goes in a hurry, and swishes-if you don't say it, you won't say it. Thousands of tall buildings, sleeping three feet. No matter how good the heavenly palace is, it is only a temporary residence; This mountain is your permanent home.

(Wukong snorted and drew it. )

kidnap

Zhao Benshan: No introduction is needed. I know what you are doing on the Western Heaven Road.

Pig Bajie: Then tell me what I do.

Zhao Benshan: You are the big boss in business-

Pig Bajie: What-?

Zhao Benshan: That's impossible.

Pig Bajie: Hey, the big boss has become a monk?

Zhao Benshan: I see, and you are. Somebody!

Tang Priest: Hey, how do you know that he is a burden bearer?

Zhao Benshan: Big head and thick neck, either rich or porters!