New friends, please click the blue word to follow me. Young Dai men and women get married. Generally speaking, it is the custom to live in the woman's house, that is, the man goes to the woman's house, so the wedding is mainly held in the woman's house.

Before the wedding, the bride and groom will go to the Buddhist temple to worship Buddha and pray for good luck and happiness and grow old together. There are many ways for young Dai men and women to fall in love, and there is a popular activity among Dai people called "string divination".

That is, unmarried boys find unmarried girls to fall in love on festivals or occasions such as * * *. This kind of activity is usually carried out during the water-splashing festival, dragon boat race and rush pendulum. Young men and women are singing and dancing, starting in the evening and ending late at night.

In addition, there is a more peculiar form of "selling chicken". When the festival comes, some Dai girls kill their own fat chickens and stew them. If the young man who comes to buy chicken is not satisfied with the girl, the girl will double the money.

If a girl has a crush on a young boy, she will bow her head shyly and avoid the boy's eyes. If the boys are interested, they will walk into the quiet Woods with chickens and stools and pour out their love to each other.

The courtship of Dai boys is also very strange. No matter spring, summer, autumn and winter, boys will wrap themselves in a wide blanket when looking for a couple, showing only two eyes. They stood by the roadside, waiting for the arrival of the girl, which is also a temporary sign of unmarried boys.

The sign of a girl without a partner is to wear a light-colored coat, trousers and a small waist. As long as a young man sees a girl dressed like this passing by, he can go forward and make love.

If a girl has a crush on a young man, he will take off the blanket and take the girl's hand and leave the road to discuss in detail. When the relationship between the two parties is mature, the man usually asks his uncle or menstruation to propose marriage, and the other party can get married after agreeing.

On the wedding day of Dai wedding custom, many relatives and friends sent by the man's family came to the woman's house to attend the wedding. Accompanied by the groom, they knocked on the elephant foot drum and the Tang drum all the way and happily came to the woman's house. They also set off firecrackers and birds along the way to increase the festive atmosphere and drive away evil spirits.

The wedding begins at the woman's door: a carpet is laid on the floor, a small altar is placed on it, and flowers and fruit wine are placed on the table. The bride and groom, dressed in beautiful national costumes, sat side by side in front of the tapestry and asked the monk to recite the scriptures.

After reading, the monk tied colored silk threads on the wrists of the bride and groom respectively to show their blessings. Then, if the man wants to walk into the woman's house, he needs to go through several checkpoints: first, when he arrives at the door, the bamboo door has been closed, and he needs to set off firecrackers and pay a gift before opening the door for the man to pass; Second, when climbing the bamboo building, the man was stopped by the woman's people, and the man had to pay to climb the building; Third, after entering the house, the bride was hidden and could not see the bride.

The man had to make a ceremony and propose a toast. After several entreaties and twists and turns, the bride was sent out. This series of processes contains the meaning of testing the groom and is full of joy and festive atmosphere.

Tie-thread ceremony Dai wedding custom A small table was placed in the hall of the bamboo building. On the table were two conical hats made of banana leaves, and a cooked male hen was placed below. There are also gifts from the man to the woman on the table, such as clothes, skirts, silver belts, bracelets and so on.

In addition, there are glutinous rice, brown sugar, bananas, salt, white lines and so on. At the beginning of the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom knelt side by side at the wedding table to receive the blessing of the old man and the congratulations of the guests.

Then, the wedding ceremony will send a congratulatory message, and all the people present will put their right hands on the table and bow their heads to listen to the congratulatory message. After the congratulatory message, the bride and groom each tear off a ball of glutinous rice from the table, dip it in wine, then order chicken, salt and white thread three times, and then put the rice ball back on the table after the order.

In this way, the officiant picked up a long white line on the table, bypassed the shoulders of the bride and groom from left to right, and put both ends of the line on the wedding table, indicating that their "souls" have been tied together and will never be separated. Then, the old people here also picked up white lines and tied them on the wrists of the bride and groom respectively, wishing the newlyweds happiness and good luck. The born son will farm and build a house, and the born girl will weave and plant trees ... After tying the thread, one chicken on the table will be dedicated to the ceremony, and the other will be shared with the boys, wishing them to find their beloved girl as soon as possible and tie the thread happily.

The rest of the things are placed next to the curtains of the newlyweds and can't be eaten for three days. After tying the thread, we began to entertain the guests.

Most of the dishes on the table are bland, and a bowl of blood-nourishing stew symbolizes the auspiciousness of marriage. During the dinner, the bride and groom should politely propose a toast to the guests, and the guests will also ask various questions to answer, and some people will ask the bride and groom to perform programs. It will make everyone laugh from time to time and the atmosphere will be warm and active.

In the process of the wedding, A Dai singer Zanha's singing is absolutely indispensable. Dai people often say that a wedding without Zanha is not lively and the wine is not good.

Therefore, the wedding is an opportunity for men and women to show their talents. When people are eating and drinking, listening to the songs of praise and singing to a wonderful place, people will burst into cheers of "water, water, water".

Listen, this is Zanha's song: Today is the time for the phoenix to dance,/Today is the time for the peacock to be proud,/On auspicious days,/All the guests are the most respected. /Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,/I want to sing the best and most beautiful songs.

/First of all, I wish the newlyweds,/They are good children in the world,/As beautiful as bananas,/As strange as coconuts. After Zanha sang, the wedding guests danced with the bride and groom.

In the sound of drums and elephant feet, people gather in the courtyard or square to dance all night. At dawn the next day, the groom will return to his parents' home and his wife's home at night.

On the third day, the man's parents came to the woman's house to recognize relatives with cold noodles and other things, and sent a piece of cold noodles to relatives and friends respectively. On the fifth day after marriage, the bride and groom took cold noodles to the man's house to recognize their relatives, and at the same time gave a piece of cold noodles to relatives and friends, who also gave gifts to the bride.

At this point, the whole wedding is over. After marriage, the man usually has to live in the woman's house for three years before he can take his wife back to the man's house. After living in the man's house for three years, you can return to the woman's house. This is called "three years to go, three years to come".

It was not until the couple built their own house and became financially independent that they left their parents to stand on their own feet.

2. How old must Dai boys get married in Xishuangbanna?

Dai people are still in a "matriarchal society", where women are the masters and women marry men.

Boys were sent to Buddhist temples as monks when they were very young, where they studied culture, but they learned to write in Dai instead of Chinese characters. Only at the age of eighteen can they return to vulgarity. There is not much difference between a boy's marriage and our daughter's marriage, and there is also a bride price. The boy's dowry is not prepared at home, but organized by the collective (Dai or collective ownership).

Dai men and women can also fall in love freely. After the love is recognized by the woman, they must work as coolies in the girl's house for three years. In the first year, they went up the mountain to cut wood, in the second year, they did farm work, and in the third year, they went to the river to find gold. After three years of marriage, men are mainly looking after children at home, so they don't have to do coolies anymore. Men can take their children back to their parents' home for a few days when they are free. Every day, men do housework at home and women go out to work to earn money to support their families. Therefore, Dai women look older, but their family status is also high.

3. How to judge the marriage in Xishuangbanna?

According to the theoretical explanation, marital * * * refers to the behavior that the husband forcibly has sexual relations with his wife by violence, coercion or other means against his wife's will during the existence of the relationship between husband and wife (especially in the case of abnormal marital status, such as separation and filing divorce proceedings). However, in Shanghai, Sichuan, Henan and other places, there have been cases in which husbands forced their wives to have sex with them, and there are also many differences in the handling of such cases by judicial organs. Whether there is * * * in marriage and whether "marital coercion" constitutes a crime has always been controversial in theoretical and judicial circles.

The so-called marital * * * refers to the behavior that a husband forces his wife to have sex with him by violence, coercion or other means against her will. The phenomenon of * * in marriage is not strange in real life, and it has always been controversial in jurisprudence. In principle, the criminal law of our country excludes the behavior of a husband having sex against his wife's will during the legal marriage relationship from * *, which causes other serious circumstances such as injury or abuse, and can be combined with other crimes such as intentional injury and abuse. China's marriage law only provides for domestic violence, not marital * * *. There has been no good and clear explanation in legislation, and there are great hidden dangers in safeguarding the rights of couples, especially wives.

4. Dai marriage customs

Family marriage in Dehong and Dai areas in the mainland has a more distinct feudal color, and marriage is completely based on buying, selling and arranging.

Generally, there are many other fees for the bride price of 300 yuan, such as "opening the door", "closing the door", "going to court", "Buddhist fees", "dowry fees" and "matchmaker fees", which add up to more than ten yuan. This has essentially become a woman's value.

Many young men from poor families, unable to afford the money, took the method of stealing their relatives to get married, that is, when the feelings of men and women were mature, the date of "robbing marriage" was determined. A young man twice his partner, armed with a machete and copper coins, ambushed at a predetermined place, and when the girl came, he "grabbed" and ran.

The girl pretended to shout to inform her family that the man took the copper coins and fled. After the fait accompli, please ask the matchmaker to propose marriage to the woman's house, and both sides invite leaders, relatives and friends to discuss and solve it. After the dowry was fixed, they officially got married.

In addition, in these areas, the phenomenon of adoption is also very common, but it is completely different from Xishuangbanna. It is not a legacy of primitive customs, but a product of feudal marriage. The adopted son's social status is extremely low, and his children have no right to inherit property.

The wedding of the Dai people is called "golden debt" by the people, which means wedding banquet. The wedding date can only be set from the "opening day" to the "closing day" every year (after the Dai calendar1February 15 and before the following September 15), and the main content of the wedding is the blessing and string tying of the bride and groom.

The wedding will be held at the bride's house. At that time, pigs and chickens will be killed (some people even kill cows), and rich banquets will be held to entertain relatives and friends and villagers in this village. On the wedding day, a "Mao Huan" (literally translated as a soul table) was set up in the bride's hall, with one or three tables, banana leaves, a pair of cooked male hens, glutinous rice filled with banana leaves, rice wine, salt sticks, salt, bananas, red cloth, white cloth and white thread.

Both male and female chickens need to be covered with leaf caps made of banana leaves, which is called "Suolei Cave" in Dai language. After the wedding is ready, the bride's girlfriend will accompany the bride to freshen up and wait for the groom to come to the door.

The groom also washed and changed at home, accompanied by relatives and friends, and held a wedding on the bride's bamboo building. At the beginning of the ceremony, the wife who presided over the wedding sat in the middle behind Mao Huan, and the elders sat around the table. A couple knelt in front of the wife who presided over the wedding, surrounded by relatives and friends.

The person sitting in front of "Mao Huan" put his right hand on the table and listened to the wedding ceremony. Take off the leaf hat that covers the food at the wedding, and bless the bride and groom first: "Today is a beautiful and auspicious day, and now is the best time of the day. You two get married with love, Jinfeng and Tongfeng get married, and life will be happy and beautiful. I hope children have children, and I hope you have daughters. I wish you happiness and never give up. "

After the wedding, the bride and groom each grabbed a ball of glutinous rice and put it on the table, dipped it in rice wine, salt, boiled salt and plantain, and put it on the table.

The officiating person picked up a long white line, wrapped it around the shoulders of the bride and groom from left to right, and put both ends of the white line on the "Mao Huan" to show that the hearts of the couple are tied together. Then take two white lines and wrap them around the wrists of the bride and groom, wishing the newlyweds a hundred years of harmony and no disaster.

The elders present also took two strands of white thread and tied them to the hands of the bride and groom. They tied the thread and read some wishes. After tying the thread, the wedding is basically over and the wedding reception begins. The bride and groom toasted the guests.