First of all, you have to be convinced that you can overcome this difficulty. There are many people, both men and women, who have overcome it, and if you are determined, you can do it too. Making up your mind is the first step, the starting point. You must resolve to stop masturbating, and when you do, the problem is to a large extent solved. This resolution must be more than a hope, more than the knowledge that it will be good for you, it must be a real resolution! If you resolve to heal yourself, you have the strength to resist your bad tendencies and any outside temptations. After you have made this decision, follow this method:
Guidelines for Self-Control
1. Touching the private parts of your body is strictly forbidden, except when you are on the toilet.
2. Avoid being alone as much as possible, find some good company and stay among them.
3. If you have a close friend who has the same problem, you must stop seeing him. Do not associate with anyone who has the same problem. Don't think that two people can quit together, it can never be done. You must get away from such people. Because when you see them, you cannot help thinking about your problem. This fault must be strictly removed from your mind. Your mind must be set on something else or something more wholesome.
4. When you take a bath, do not look in the mirror and admire yourself. The shower should not take more than 5 or 6 minutes, which is enough time for you to shower, dry off, dress and get out of the shower and back to your family.
5. If the bed is the place where you are most likely to make a mistake, dress properly enough for the night so that you can't easily touch key parts of your body, which makes removing clothing difficult and laborious. By the time you start to remove your protective clothing, you'll have enough time to control your thoughts and stay away from temptation.
6. If temptation seems uncontrollable while you're in bed and you have to get up immediately, you can go to the kitchen and fix yourself some dessert, even if it's midnight, even if you're not hungry, even if you're worried about gaining weight. The purpose of this is to distract you. You are in control of your consciousness, so to speak.
7. Stay away from pornography. Don't read about masturbation. Don't think about masturbation. Remember: "Once you think about it, you do it." It is necessary to change the way you think, to get that thought out of your head. Once you do that, you will quit him.
8. Healthy things should always be on your mind. You can read a good book, or better yet, read a passage every day that is morally uplifting.
9. You can also pray and make wishes. But don't talk about masturbation, because it will make you think about it all the time. Pray for sincerity, for understanding, for your relatives, friends, family. Don't think about masturbation, don't mention masturbation, don't talk about masturbation with others, don't mention it in your prayers, let it leave your mind. The attitude towards the problem determines how easy it is to overcome it. The key is to commit yourself to overcoming it. When a person understands the reasons for doing so, conditions and circumstances are created to help put it into practice, and he will have the power to control it. Masturbation can bring guilt and emotional stress. Excessive masturbation kills and maims the body. It is a completely self-centered act of secretion that does not at all express the human being's own ability to reproduce. This masturbatory behavior can lead to a loss of self-esteem, can weaken one's faith, can feel that one's responsibilities become burdensome, and can see one's obligations as charity.
Other suggestions:
1. One should do more spiritual exercises to overcome temptations in general and not wait until they are at their strongest to pray.
2. Develop a vigorous daily exercise program. Exercise reduces mental tension and frustration, and it is absolutely fundamental to problem solving. Exercise can be doubled when you feel increased stress.
3. When the thought of masturbation is strong, do your best to stop it in your head. You can recite famous quotes or sing an uplifting song. The most important thing is to turn your thoughts away from indulging in selfish needs.
4. Set an abstinence goal, starting every day, then month by month, year by year, and eventually reaching total abstinence. You can't truly overcome temptation until you are completely abstinent.
5. Imagine yourself as a changed person on a regular basis, which will make it easy for you to make radical changes in your behavior and attitude. Take time each day to visualize yourself as having enough power and self-control to easily overcome the temptations of your environment.
6. Make a day-by-day improvement plan. Combine this program with participating in charity events and improving your relationships. Work on building your strengths and talents in this area.
7. Be friendly. Force yourself to **** things with others, to learn to work and communicate with others. You can learn how to make friends through books, such as reading How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
8. Understand the circumstances that frustrate you, that make you feel alone, bored, lost, and discouraged. These mindsets can tempt you to masturbate to escape. Be prepared for these downturns by reading a book, visiting friends, or playing sports.
9. Make a card-type portable calendar and carry it with you, don't show it to anyone. Once you lose control on a particular day, color that day red. Your goal is no red. The calendar will be a strong visual signal to remind you to exercise self-control. You will notice it when you are attempting to add red color. Keep the calendar until you have no red for three months.
10. You should carefully examine when and under what circumstances you are most likely to masturbate. Recall details such as exact times and specific circumstances in detail. Now that you know how it happens, free yourself by breaking the pattern through opposite behavior.
11. One type of psychotherapy is called "aversion therapy". When we associate the disgusting with the pleasant but unwanted, the disgust will cancel out the pleasantness. If you associate disgust with a loss of self-control, this can help you end masturbation. For example, once you want to masturbate, you can imagine having to take a bath in a tub full of worms, scorpions, spiders, and centipedes and being devoured by them after you masturbate.
12. When you go to the toilet or take a shower, leave the bathroom door or shower curtain open a crack to avoid being completely alone. Take cool showers.
13. Get up in the morning as soon as you wake up. No matter what time of day it is, you can't stay in bed. Get up and do something. Start each day with enthusiastic behavior.
14. Empty your bladder. Avoid drinking a lot of fluids before resting.
15. Use less spices and condiments in your food. Keep dinner as simple as possible.
16. Choose pajamas that are hard to get out of, but loose and don't stick to your body.
17. Avoid people, environments, pictures or reading materials that stimulate your sexual urges.
18. It is useful to set a goal of physical activity in the process of overcoming.
19. In very severe cases, it is necessary to tie one hand to the bed frame, which helps to end masturbation in a half-sleep state. Wearing layers of clothes that make it difficult to remove them in a semi-sleeping state can do the same thing.
20. Create a reward system for your success. It doesn't have to be a big reward. For every quarter of the way through your program, a reward will cheer you up and remind you to keep getting better.
21. Don't allow yourself to fall back into patterns that cause you problems. There will always be difficulties. It is prudent to remain calm and confident. Keep a positive mindset. Have faith that you can be victorious. When you do this, you will feel joyful and full of strength, which will make your life radiant and will bring you fulfillment and satisfaction in life