1. Youth is like toilet paper. It looks like there is a lot of it, but once you use it, it won’t be enough.

2. The first party after graduation was at the zoo. The reason is: Only here can I feel that I still have a sense of self!

3. The farthest distance in the world is not life and death, nor is it not knowing each other, but we are sitting together while you are playing with your phone.

4. I decided to straighten out the earphones and put them aside, then hide them and secretly watch how they wrapped themselves up.

5. Learn Feng Shui when you have time, and occupy a good tomb after death, which can make up for the regret of not being able to afford a good house during your lifetime.

6. Some people dare to laugh at me in front of me for being cowardly. They are too courageous.

7. Eating together is called sharing a meal, and going home together is called carpooling. You leave the rest of your life to me and live together from now on. This is called desperately.

8. "You actually have 1.2 million fans, that's amazing!" "What's so amazing? I bought 1 million." "Isn't there 200,000 left?" "Buy 1 million and get 200,000 free!" 9. Me

I signed up to participate in the World Lying Contest. As soon as I came on stage, the host said: "Wow, you are so beautiful!" I shyly replied: "You are not beautiful, you are just average!" As soon as I finished speaking, the organizer sent me the winner.

Trophy!

10. People who smoke have worries, people who drink have stories, and people who smoke and drink are getting their hair permed!

11. Going to school means watching sleeping pills of different flavors walking around in front of you every day. There is always one that can make you sleep soundly!

12. People who love to laugh will not be too unlucky, because people who are too unlucky cannot laugh at all.

13. The little snail said: "Dad, I want to be a soldier and patrol the border!" The snail's father said: "Okay, I will go next door and buy you a small map tomorrow. You can patrol next month." 14.

, the most annoying thing is when the shopping guide chases me and asks: "Hello, how can I help you?" To be honest, I just want him to help me pay!

15. Chatting without the same language is like a piece of loose sand. There is no need for the wind to blow it. After chatting for a few words, I want to take a shower.

16. "Why do parents only look at scores?" "Nonsense, do you think they understand the questions?" 17. The teacher asked angrily: Who ate the banana peel on the ground?

Xiao Ming stood up and said: I don’t know who ate the peel, but I ate the banana.

18. Bajie, don’t think that you are a night-light pig standing under the street lamp.

19. You have the nerve to lie, how can I have the nerve not to believe you?

20. If you like a girl, study hard, find a good job, earn a lot of money, and when she gets married, you can contribute more.