Writer Turgenev said: Do you want to be a happy person? Then you must first learn to endure hardship. Those who can endure hardship can endure all misfortunes, and there is no difficulty in the world that cannot be overcome. Far-sighted parents, no matter how much they love their children, are willing to let them endure these four kinds of suffering. Here are some real stories about family education that I will share with you. Welcome to read!
1. The pain of independence
Do you still remember the story "Fried Eggs with Tomatoes" that hit the circle of friends last year?
A new arrival in the United States An international student wants to make tomato scrambled eggs to entertain his classmates.
However, he neither knows how to beat eggs nor cut tomatoes, nor does he know whether to put eggs or tomatoes first when cooking.
So he sent a voice message to his mother in China for help. Her mother quickly sent voice guidance, but the boy still didn’t understand.
There was no other way, so the mother had no choice but to demonstrate it herself, recorded it as a video and sent it to her son.
Under the detailed guidance of his mother, the boy finally completed the most common and basic traditional Chinese food, and was praised by his classmates.
It wasn’t until the end of the video that the boy realized that his mother got up at 4 o’clock in the morning to show him how to make tomato scrambled eggs.
Many people were moved by the video and praised: "There are no quiet years, it's just that someone is carrying the burden for you."
But what more people saw was Boys are not independent at the age when they can get married and have children. When encountering such a trivial matter, the first thing that comes to mind is to "find a mother", a proper mother's baby.
Nowadays, children in primary school all know that if they don’t understand anything, they can ask Baidu. If they are abroad, they can ask Google. Why do they have to get their mother up in the middle of the night to demonstrate it in person?
Some people feel sorry for the mother in the video. It is undeniable that she loves her children, but they also have to admit that they are the ones who caused the current situation.
When the children are around, they are not taught to be independent. When the children are far away, they have to suffer the pain of "not being independent".
Peng Kaiping, Dean of the Academy of Social Sciences of Tsinghua University, said:
Real education is not to cultivate plants in a greenhouse, but to help children build a complete personality and teach them to face the world alone. .
But parents often love their children very much and often say: "Just study, don't worry about the rest."
So they do everything for their children and think about everything for their children. , this is not wrong, but can parents raise their children for a lifetime?
If not, it is better to let go and teach the child to be independent so that he has the ability and courage to face the world alone.
In this way, even if one day they lose the strong support of their parents, the children can continue to move forward along the original track of life.
2. The pain of studying
On the way back from the Dragon Boat Festival, I met a fellow countryman and chatted for a few words. I found out that he had just finished the college entrance examination.
Ask him how he feels about the test? He said it was much better than last year.
Last year at this time, he finished the college entrance examination, but his score was only enough to go to a vocational and technical college. His parents asked him to repeat the exam, but he refused.
Instead, I went to work with a group of classmates. I didn’t have much expectations at first. I just wanted to earn tuition before school started in September.
But I didn’t expect there to be so few. They work hard every day and can only earn 1,000 yuan a month. Although room and board are included, the accommodation environment is very bad, and there is always a faint smell of urine.
Within a few days, several of the classmates who came with him ran back in despair. He was thinking about fighting for a breath and felt that he could still hold on.
One month later, it was time to pay wages, but the factory told them that they would wait a month before paying them. He collapsed instantly.
At the right time, his parents asked him to repeat his studies again, so he went back. However, it was not easy to repeat his studies, but no matter how hard it was, it was not as hard as working at that time.
He said: "Studying is hard, but it is hard work with dignity. When working, I often feel that I am not a person, but a working machine."
This For one year, he got up at 5:30 in the morning and went to bed at 12:30 in the evening. He persisted for 365 days, and the completed test paper was one meter high.
When I was young and frivolous, I always felt that studying was the hardest thing in the world. Only after I passed that age did I realize that studying was the best way in the world.
I watched the admissions promotion videos of Peking University and Tsinghua University a few days ago, and I was deeply moved.
If I could go back in time, I would really like to tell myself when I thought studying was hard: work harder and get into a better school, it will really make a difference.
Children are ignorant, but their parents are experienced.
When your child wants to be lazy, force him. When he wants to give up, encourage him. One day, he will be grateful for the hard work he endured to study today.
3. The pain of growing up
In the variety show "Fengwei", Jay Chou once vented his bitterness to Nicholas Tse. When he was a child, his mother used a cane to urge him to practice piano.
At first, Jay Chou told his mother that he liked painting, so her mother enrolled him in an art class, but he gave up after persisting for a while.
After he changed to piano lessons, in order to keep his son going, his mother would stand behind him with a cane every time he practiced.
If he got tired of playing, or secretly looked at his friends playing outside the window, the cane in his mother's hand would be knocked down hard.
In addition, his mother also hired a very professional and strict piano teacher for him. Whenever he made a mistake in playing, the piano teacher would hit his hand with a cane.
Jay Chou said that he felt very painful at the time and even wanted to give up.
Thinking about it now, I am very grateful to my mother: her strictness in the beginning made me what I am today. I even wrote a song "Listen to Mom" ??to thank my mother.
Coincidentally, Liu Xianhua also said frankly in "Longing for Life": "I am very, very grateful to my parents."
When he was a child, his parents forced him to learn violin. He was also very resistant, but his parents did not allow him. He gives up.
He didn't like playing the violin until he was eleven or twelve years old, then he entered his first competition and from then on he started to like it.
In essence, everyone is similar. They will instinctively resist and avoid things that are difficult or require hardship, and children are no exception.
But after they have gone through that painful time and gained new opportunities, they will often thank themselves and their strict parents for their courage to start.
"Gintama" said: "On the road to success, there are no shortcuts or techniques, and the only secret to reaching the end is - never give up and move forward!"
If you endure hardships for growth, you will eventually transform into a butterfly.
4. The hardship of life
Director Jiang Wenzeng spent a whole year taking his two sons, aged 6 and 4, to Aksu, Xinjiang to receive militarized training.
The temperature difference between day and night is huge in the Aksu area. At 6:30 in the morning, the weather was extremely cold. Jiang Wen asked the children to get up and dragged them for a run. They were not allowed to go home until they finished the run.
His sons don’t like to drink goat’s milk, and he doesn’t tolerate them. In addition, his daily diet also follows local customs.
Slowly, the children gradually adapted from being unaccustomed to it at first. Jiang Wen said that the children have grown from "bean sprouts" to "yew trees".
When his wife Zhou Yun came to visit, not only did the children's skin become rough, but they also had two patches of plateau red on their faces.
But it is obvious that their self-care ability has improved. They can tidy up their own rooms and help with cleaning.
Jiang Wen said that the food that children today lack most is not nutrition, but suffering.
Fu Peirong said that enduring hardship is not to surpass others, but to face the true face of life, because in suffering, life has no cover and can show its depth, breadth and height.
Children who have experienced hardship understand that life is not easy and that every meal is hard-earned.
Their impression of life is no longer limited to the "sweat drops in the soil, every grain of hard work" in the textbooks, but is truly based on their current experiences.
Children who have experienced hardship cherish their current life more.
They know how to be grateful, are more considerate of their parents’ difficulties, and are more resilient. When encountering difficulties, they are stronger than their peers.
Zhang Ailing said that because she understands, she is compassionate. This sentence is also applicable to children.
Teach them the hardships of life and lead them to understand the ups and downs of life, so that they will naturally understand that everything is hard-won.
Mr. Yang Jiang said:
If you want to train a person who can do great things, you must make him suffer hardships and be unsatisfied in order to develop a persevering character.
After a person undergoes different levels of exercise, he will obtain different levels of cultivation and different levels of benefits. Just like spices, the more you pound them, the finer they are ground, the stronger the fragrance becomes.
No hardship in the world is in vain. The hardships you endure today pave the way for a better tomorrow.
Never let your children choose comfort at an age when they should endure hardship. Only by being willing to let your children endure hardship can you gain a different life.
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2. True stories about family education: Don’t Give up disciplining children
3. Family education stories about patience
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