First, two foreigners ate jiaozi in China during the Spring Festival. One said, "I was so stupid. I peeled jiaozi for the first time."

The other one said, "You are all right. I thought it was spitting out the nucleus."

Second, every family posts the blessings upside down during the New Year, which means that the blessings have arrived.

Today, I wrote a piece of money on a whim and stuck it upside down on the door, which means the money has arrived.

When the daughter-in-law saw it, she slapped it and said, I asked you to post money backwards, let you post money backwards, post money backwards ...

Tough guy

Third, there was an illiterate local rich man who asked someone to write a couplet for him during the Chinese New Year. Mr. Wang wrote a pair: days increase years and people increase their lives; Spring is full of dry kunfu.

The local rich man couldn't read, so he asked his husband to read it to him, and he read it to him once. He shook his head and said, No, I wanted my mother to prolong her life, but you changed it! Mr. Wang said: however, the upper and lower links are antagonistic, and the upper link should be changed, and the lower link should also be changed.

the rich man said: change, change together! As a result, the couplet was changed to this: days increase years and mothers increase their lives; Spring is full of dry kunda's father.

Fourth, when I made an appointment with others that day, my brothers all took out knives and sticks from their bags. When I took out the magic wand of Balala, I knew I couldn't be a big brother anymore.

V. A: "Why is the manhole cover round?"

B: "Boring, if it's square, you must ask why it's square, then it must have a shape."

C: "Because you can get out when you steal!"

Let go of the second child, and this product will be mine in the future.

Sixth, a man called 186 customer service and asked, "What should I do if my mobile phone card is dropped?"

The customer service said, "Bring the relevant ID card to the business hall to reissue the card."

The man said, "Can't I pick it up?"

customer service: "..."

VII. A: "Do you know the four famous brands?"

b: "yo! I don't know yet! It's just Beijing duck eggs, Gaoyou salted eggs, Shandong goose eggs, and Australian ostrich eggs! "

8. A lady chooses a hat in a fur shop: "I like this white rabbit fur hat very much, but I wonder if rabbit fur is afraid of rain?"

The shopkeeper replied, "Of course not. When have you ever seen a rabbit with an umbrella?"

9. Going out for a walk, when passing by the park pond, I saw a young man lying on the pond with a straw stuck in the water to suck. There was a girl standing next to him, holding her hands and looking at him coldly.

I walked over curiously and asked, "What is this? Fishing for shrimp? "

The girl snorted coldly: "Leave him alone. If you drink too much, you have to say that you are the Dragon King of the East China Sea, and you have to suck up the water in the pond."

1. In class today, there was a female classmate who burped all the class. Seeing her painful appearance, we were all giving her advice. As a result, a sleeping classmate next to her suddenly got up and said, "What's the matter, why are toads barking all the class?"